Today is my WordPress anniversary! I’m not doing anything special to celebrate the day but I did take some snaps for you! With messy hair and a t-shirt. My basic, every day look. But now my hair looks messier than ever because my roots aren’t matching my drapes. BUT this is the year I am ATTEMPTING to love me as I am. And because I love me, I don’t want to put any more chemicals on my hair that I’ve been carefully growing out for nearly 3 years (the length of time I’ve been out of the Army). Once my ride is paid off, TATTOOS shall become me (I have 3 already). I would like some more piercings in my ears as well! Things I couldn’t do while serving honorably for 15 years!
I gave up lots of rights y’all probably take for granted. But now, I am attempting to enjoy those rights that y’all had that I didn’t have. And some folks don’t like that because it doesn’t serve their needs. But that’s okay too because this journey is teaching me who my real friends and family are. Who my real fans and supporters are. And exposing enemies wrapped like allies. And I appreciate those who allow me room to grow because there are many who are still holding onto versions of me that no longer exist. A narcissist may not be able to change but I can. I just wish I could forget a lot of the things they have done to me. Those things primarily being abuse. Anyhoo.
Thanks for the love and attention y’all. It’s non-existent in my real life. And dudes truly only care about the dirty gals. They pass me over like trash. They make me feel invisible and make me wish I had never been born… Or they are only interested in sex. Nothing more. Like, I’m a person with real feelings. But I’m either trash or a sex object, to them, that’s it. Depression is an understatement. What self-esteem? They’ve killed it. It’s a daily struggle to go on, to even want a purpose anymore. I can’t hide the sadness in my face any longer. Disappointment is an understatement. There are no words…
Except, I love you. Thank you for supporting me. For your follows. Your likes. Your re-shares. Your comments. Your pledges on my Patreon. Your encouragement. I need it more than ever now. You matter. ❤
PoeEternal 