poeeternal

Posted on October 10, 2023 by poeeternal

Kite

Happy as a kite
The words you write
Like succulent cake
What a pair we’d make

Fell down the rabbit hole again
That’s where you’ve been
Like tumbling down the tower
Need you any hour

Posted on October 9, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Lights

He lights my whole future
He threads my wounds with suture
Life starts and ends with his blues
If only I was his muse

Postscript: I broke down and renewed my medical card. Instant approval. Ordered my goods online, they called immediately letting me know my script was expired. I have an appointment in the morning with the good doc and she said, “okay, will go ahead and fill it”

Haven’t smoked since May and come tomorrow I’m gonna be on the moon.

They had cartridges for $18. *sigh*

I thought it would takes weeks or more before I could smoke again.

Nope. Less than 24 hours. 🎃

Maybe I’ll start writing again and going to the beach.

I need to disassociate.

All this death and dying.

All my lingerie sitting in a drawer.

Boo season is here 🎃

*casts spell on bad neighbor*

Posted on October 8, 2023 by poeeternal

Gypsy & Ghost

Where did she go?
Wandering in a sea of abyss?
From the words off his lips?
Like a gypsy moving with the wind?

What hath sailed?
Lies foretold we reminisce?
Love is rare like an eclipse?
Reasons we can’t comprehend?

Maybe you’re lying dormant
Winter’s a time to cool
Maybe I’m not important
When others give you fuel

I wish I could remember my own worth
I’m like your shadow always following
Be the one you’re living for on earth
Instead a ghost always wallowing

I WANT TO SEE WHAT YOU SEE / LOVE WHAT YOU LOVE ❤️

I miss making photography. I hope I’m in a space to do so again this lifetime.

Apparently Kat Von D denounced her witchery and burned all her witchcraft books and got baptized yet still performs with stripper polls on stage.

I like the baptism and burning of the books.

I’d rather see her follow Christ and listen to the Cure than be all Satanic.

Can we talk about how the Bible has been re-written to be Satanic tho?

Now I need to wash out my tongue for mentioning the Unholy One.

🎃

Posted on October 4, 2023October 5, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Green

I want to make amends
I wasn’t myself back then
I’m not myself again

I wanted to be seen
Your grass is always green
Watered and serene

I want us to be friends
Pay back all dividends
I want a different lens

I want it all like queen
Not asking much it seems
But you’re like Halloween

Where darkness descends
And all my words offends
Sins multiplied by tens

More places I linger: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

P.S.

I hate blocks. I hate WordPress. I can’t sort out the about me page no matter what I do. Even though I pay for a plan, I’m not privy to chat support cuz it’s a personal plan.

I hate how I treated you.

Even though I wasn’t in control of myself.

I just started group therapy once a week for six months and others in group say “like” and “uhm” every other word. I’m not exaggerating.

They have zero self-awareness and the conversation makes me wanna end all existence.

People do this on social media too and I wanna jump from a bridge.

It’s so hard to engage or have compassion when all I hear is terrible speech patterns.

Helps.

You’re like a little piece of string in a dark cave I can’t let go of.

Posted on September 30, 2023 by poeeternal

Under

The fact that he drops in
Like moonlight in the cracks
He likes her writing
It gets under my skin

I guess I’m a ghost then
I guess we’re parallax
And I’m still searching
For where my life begins

Find me here: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

Posted on September 27, 2023September 27, 2023 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Obituary

Would you write my obituary?
And lay to rest all the sins I carry?
For to sadness I am married
And our love it should be buried

They come
They go
It’s my fault though
Status too low
Weep like willow

You’re always on the run
Never stop running
You’re never having fun
Complain the sun is sunning

I’ve never had anything, and now I’ve got too much.
And I could lose it anytime, that’s always been my luck.

I’m sorry but I’m not
I said what I thought
Feelings come and go
Sometimes I take a shot
No matter lesson told
I say it on the spot
You know I can be cold

People already think so lowly of me, I can’t get anymore low.

But it’s easy to judge when your grass is always green.

I’ve been on this earth unmarried for eons, it’s literally hell.

I like being naughty sometimes but I never was that naughty.

We’re literally born nude and we can’t take our clothing to heaven.

I miss doing spicy photography.

I don’t know what to tell you

I just wish I was already moved.

But I’m holding out for land instead of spending uppers of $6k to jump apartment’s.

I am overdue a new environment.

It’s hard to be inspired and motivated in a place I can’t stand.

I’ve only ever posted nude photos, never compromised myself by doing anything other than photography. Though many requests came in with $$$ offerings and I ran folks off.

I have some very cute outfits and have been working out despite growing old.

95% of my household items are gone. Either sold, donated or dumped.

Things are in boxes minus my closet.

I still sleep on the floor.

So think what you will of me, but I miss my tribe.

My accounts were active and I had a lot of traffic.

Now everything is stagnant.

I’m tired of stagnation.

I don’t see anything wrong with nude art.

It teaches me how to be a woman, something man has failed at doing.

But they gave me my username back, and that makes me feel better. 😘

I’m terrible with secrets.

I don’t know where I’m going, I just know I don’t want to be here.

Stuck in a literal black hole.

Need some routine and inspiration in my life.

Don’t even like this city.

Wanna burn all the bridges down.

Stuck in purgatory

LOST 😞

Find me at: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

Posted on September 19, 2023 by poeeternal · 3 Comments

Barely

I’m barely holding on in breath or words
The spaces where we fell I’m never sure
Apologies are song in flight that carry with the birds
And longing comes on full moon where the clouds they will obscure

Posted on September 4, 2023 by poeeternal · 8 Comments

Landscape

Could be mars
Waiting on you
Or falling stars
The distance you do

Healing scars
When sky is blue
Earth should be ours
But you’re as far as moon

So I’m 130 pounds now. The protein shakes and doughnuts are definitely working. Photos from yesterday.

Posted on August 31, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Almost Pt 2 (freestyle poetry)

I almost followed you
Down dreary days
And thicket forests
Searching rainbows
Behind sullen skies

Peering hopelessness
Digging up rotten regrets

I nearly ran to your sorrow
And planted beneath
The light that followed

So only calloused calls
Would echo from the hollow

I almost heard you cry
The grumble of Apollo

But only darkness lies
The beating of tomorrow

I WAS NOT TRYING TO WRITE A RHYME

I MADE HUGE EFFORT TO NOT RHYME

BUT MY MIND HAD A MIND OF ITS OWN

I STILL LOVE HIM

Plant me a rose garden dear? In our cemetery.

Posted on August 30, 2023 by poeeternal

Almost (freestyle poetry)

Like all of the dirt was swept under the rug
And tongue twisted lies were a shadow of smug
For the pressure of meaning was soft like a quilt
But the weight of the wrong was as heavy as guilt

And we speak in code like our lives are a riddle
But the circle of destiny is not in the middle
And try as we might the cross has been hung
But only regret can measure our tongue

I almost hit like on your post 😩

By accident 😩

Weighed in at 130. The protein shakes are working.

Sorry about the weird start of the poem – like lines are missing – an incomplete idea – but this is what was flowing out and I wanted to get it down

I hope you like it

Find me at: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

Posted on August 23, 2023August 23, 2023 by poeeternal · 7 Comments

Please

Please pick up a feather and write me a letter
Please open your eyes and bring us sunrise
Please do right a wrong and don’t take very long
Please deliver fall and give me a call

So this guy turned 12 on Saturday. Mostly a good boy. He hates the neighborhood and I don’t blame him one bit. There’s nothing to like. We wanna move. He’s trying to make it to 13. And despite the ups and downs, I didn’t give up on him. Tribulations.

I contacted my mom on my birthday. She was happy to hear from me. She said she loved me but I never said it back.

Just wanted her to know I made it to 45.

She also kept bringing up my sister who died and I also never responded about her.

She wants to see me so I might be getting a visitor this year.

Maybe.

P.S. I’m obsessed with Pinko blazers and clothing and getting a new wardrobe. Never wore a blazer in my life and now I got a weeks worth. Even got a Beetlejuice looking one. Cuz.

I may or may not share my new wardrobe at some point. Doing it for me and no one else. Not dressing for views. But it kills the blues (shopping).

People want me posting more but it’s so much work and I can’t break 300 views.

I think I’m just exhausted in all areas of life and would rather sit outside. It’s hard for me to connect.

I’m literally dead inside.

No empathy, no sympathy.

Pissed off at the world.

Just talk to God mostly. Cry. Pray. Regret. And then practice gratitude.

I am grateful for my closet.

For owning clothing I wanna wear.

But I don’t wanna go anywhere.

Time to just be dressy cuz.

“What’s the occasion?”

“We’re in hell and I’m alive….”

Can’t take nothing with me to heaven.

Would be 10x happier if I moved somewhere the mold wasn’t killing me.

Posted on August 15, 2023 by poeeternal

Mapping

There’s something in my life that I’m still lacking
And during full moon hear the devil laughing
But maybe it’s just sorrow
Weeping louder than tomorrow
Still I cannot grasp the destiny I’m mapping

But maybe that’s the fallacy of trying
I know that failures never gratifying
You fall from roof
Then chip a tooth
And laughter sounds the same as bitter crying

You ever been stalked by some psycho bitch? Who sends her psycho friends to also stalk you? Then threatens you with a lawyer if you mention her?

Challenge accepted. Send your lawyer psycho bitch.

You’re as delusional as a Christmas fruitcake.

I’m not the type to be silenced or stolen from.

Be careful the strangers you buy from on TikTok.

Her lives were so damn depressing, after awhile I felt uneasy tuning in. 😬

Eventually cut the cord and she went full psycho.

Poem unrelated just an afterthought.

TBH his poem likely inspired my poem.

Posted on August 13, 2023August 13, 2023 by poeeternal

Everything

Everything is made to collapse
Everything is made to fall
It’s like the earth is made of glass
And nihilism is protocol

So I got my little stand put together and my TV set up to be spied on. I’m still awaiting my PS5 impatiently.

I want a big stretch out lay down bean bag. Not a couch. Something like this.

Apparently people have a couch AND these.

I want the dessert first tho.

Wanna stretch out on a giant cushion to watch a movie or play a game.

Also, I’m sick of all the narcissism in society.

I don’t believe Hawaii burning was an accident.

We are under attack, one malicious attempt after another.

You voted for this.

I no longer think voting right will accomplish anything.

Gen X are the only ones capable of fixing this mess, and we’re tired.

We’ve been ghosted from society and trashed on by every demon in the world.

Millennials are still sucking on their mothers tit, Gen Z don’t know which sex they are, Boomers are responsible for the end of society.

I do not “love thy neighbor” in any capacity or form.

All I see are demons.

The immigrants do not have our best interest, they do have our best jobs.

Yellow fever is a condition in which man is cursed.

They are under a spell they don’t want broken.

Porn activates the primal side of the brain. They get off on killing. They get off on ruining good people. Over 51% want love with a prostitute. It’s been made legal in Nevada. More murder will happen.

In college, I learned subliminal messaging was used at the grocery stores (should be illegal).

Imagine what they are putting into porn.

“We don’t know why he would do such a thing”.

STOP LYING

PORN has ruined mankind.

I’m learning to set boundaries and ghost people too.

Tis the season

Posted on August 11, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Nothing

Nothing is as before
The sun ain’t yellow
The way people plead
And bust down every door
But they don’t bleed
When they bellow
They just unravel
And yell at me
Offer poisoned apple
That I don’t need
Still I’m under cover
Collecting seed

Linkys: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

P.S. I finally stopped losing weight and gained weight and am now 120 pounds (still size small)

Women look at me with contempt often. I guess they need someone to blame. I had a basketful of treats and doughnuts 🍩 while ordering a footlong sub at Publix and could feel their eyes burning me. I tell no lies. They were not happy with me at all. Or were projecting their own unhappiness. Either way, I’m still fitness rebounding and plan to include skating before I die (hopefully not soon). Have been going on more walks with my dog too. Don’t let them lie to you and say “10,000 steps don’t count”. My motto when rebounding for a minimum of 10 minutes is “every step counts”. Cuz even if you can only take one, eventually it will be 3 and 5. So keep going, keep moving. Spiral out. 🌀

I’m upgrading my rebounder soon.

Still waiting on the ps5 notification of “ready for pickup”.

Cake is in the future, but right now it’s candy bars, doughnuts, brownie bits, and muffins. Don’t judge me.

Cuz there were 5 staring me down while ordering food.

Like chill yo. I’m famished and dreaming of sweet treats.

I don’t want it to be my downfall cuz junk food is junk food.

It’s terrible for me. I’m gonna learn to make my own sweet treats to satisfy the cravings.

Anyhoo

P.S.S. Me and him (him and I) are so in sync, that I managed to order the exact tv stand as him, same color.

I even made a second trip to Walmart to find a stand, which they didn’t have one for my size. So reluctantly got back on Amazon and did a search and read through many reviews and fought with myself on color, and slept on it, then ordered.

Sent him a text of what I got (cuz) and he responded with a picture of his entertainment area. Same fucking one.

SAME ONE

He also ordered some shit that I got mad at him about but once it arrived said he was gonna return it (so glad)

He imprinted on me in my twenties and I had a dream about him as a child.

He’s a nihilist and most days I hold him in contempt

But I ain’t returning my TV stand just cuz it happens to be the same as his.

Maybe the algorithm is to blame.

AI is always watching

If we discuss a name via text message, TikTok will show me loads of content of shit I don’t wanna see

And I yell at him for it

We had not discussed tv stands tho

I just like to show him things I buy

And yell at him for things he buys

(Like random hotel rooms by “accident”)

“I didn’t realize I reserved a room” kind of shit

Or buying flags of another country cuz he’s a traitor with yellow fever but pretends he don’t know what I mean…

I’m a fucking oracle

I know everything but in fractal formation so nothing at all

AI did not decide on the TV stand I wanted

I even drove places hunting one down

The one I decided on came in many colors, but somehow I got THE EXACT one as his.

He’s probably my twin flame

Something weird is going on….

Tis all

I also ordered this bat wing purse thing and wallet – cuz I’m gothed out in pink these days (and my obsession was before the Barbie propaganda bullshit). I probably will stop spending money soon. I have nearly everything I need.

TikTok made me buy it. Check out Wicked Misfit for cool accessories. This is my 2nd purchase from them. Recommend.

Except a playstation membership and headset for social hours.

*sigh*

Anyone wanna gift me? 🤪

P.S.S. setting up the modem soon. Gonna be utilizing the living room again. Eating at the dinner table now instead of my bed. Adding more routine to my routine.

People miss me going live too, and now that I’m regaining weight instead of losing, I kinda wanna…

Dr. Peterson says you need routine – and there’s only so much cleaning and cooking I can do.

And my life is still disorganized after letting 95% of my belongings go

Posted on August 8, 2023 by poeeternal · 9 Comments

Sinkholes

This is how sinkholes form
Faith dissolved
My guess lukewarm
Your hate involved

A lake of drought
Swales and sorrow
No way throughout
Hell’s here tomorrow

Thanks for checking out my blog & socials: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal

(No filter and lost followers after posting)

P.S. got a new 4k TV today & ordered a ps5 which shall be ready for pickup in a few days! Birthday pressies! 🥳

Posted on July 30, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Maybe

Maybe I should move to Boston
Maybe I should move to Maine
Maybe there’s another option
Maybe I’d be less insane

I ordered a new phone finally and it’s on its way soon. Maybe I will hate it as much as I hate my racist neighbors. Maybe I got Spartan blood…

Posted on July 27, 2023July 27, 2023 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Stern (freestyle poetry)

Did you build me a house on sand?
Did you kill all the ferns?
Left clouds for me to stand?
My poetry did you burn?
Did you post a sign where I am banned?
Are we waiting to take turns?
Are you flying a spaceship that is unmanned?
Do you think your hand’s too stern?

Guess how young I’m turning in August!?!

Posted on July 26, 2023July 27, 2023 by poeeternal · 13 Comments

Do You?

I miss the stars
Rotating
Around your love
And do you ever think of me
Far above?
When silence is howling
And there’s not enough?
Do you call my bluff?
Have thoughts to discuss?
Or am I just a memory
For your hate to engulf
Do you regret giving up?

Guess whose birthday is next month?

I miss you…

Posted on July 18, 2023 by poeeternal · 8 Comments

I still don’t know what’s growing

They weren’t looking too hot so I rehoused them

I still don’t know what’s growing aside from the Forget Me Nots that are slowly dying

I’m trying not to kill them

Too much sun, not enough water

Who fucking knows. But they all got a new house to stretch out their roots – which weren’t looking bad. I added magnesium salt cuz we all need it in our lives.

Someone said don’t get attached to your plants but I haven’t learned that yet.

Posted on July 17, 2023 by poeeternal

Judged (poems)

Better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6
And your enemy won’t let you forget
You remember this?
You remember that?
The enemies on my throne
He’s wearing my damn hat!

You can’t unbreak the broken
Take back words spoken
The spell in your eyes
The holes that you hide

They were bred to kill and steal
I’m behind the wheel
Driving full speed
And it ain’t you’re automobile

Bred to kill and steal
Like they made the Devil’s deal
I will send you back to hell
That’s the real ordeal

When one door closes
Nail a board over it
Plant some roses
Don’t submit

The fury inside me
Hot as the sun
The fury inside me
Someone’s gonna burn

You can’t escape from prison
Until you realize you’re in one
Like the Devil’s maze
Calling shotgun

Remove yourself
Put your tail between your legs
And get some help
Support withheld
Look in mirror and do foretell
We’re parallel
The way your lies do spin
You’re a carousel

I’m gone
Fucking replace me
Won’t let you face me
I’m racing
Dust in cloud
I’m hasty
Like laced lace
Revenge is tasty

Too cold to care
Fuck me with I dare
You build despair
And I linger there

Sometimes I think I’m talking to a ghost
And he’s dropping breadcrumbs
Like he’s the one that I love most
But I’m still hungry…

Regret will eat you alive
Nightmares become visions you wear

We are going forward in reverse
Like the truth makes it hard for the knowing
Or where we’re actually going
Like living in a hearse
The spell is his verse
And try to break this curse
It’s poison that we’re sowing

My parents ruined my life
They only sought to bring me strife
Smile at me then stab me in my back
Complain it’s God I lack

Say I’m full of darkness
Laugh at me regardless
I wish my parents were dead
I’d piss on their grave instead

Already being trolled by a Boomer cuz my student loans were forgiven that he thinks I should pay so he can enjoy his retirement at GEN X expense

College was a scam met with government furloughs and hiring freezes

Government programs favor giving our best jobs to the immigrants cuz they work harder and are smarter (according to their accord)

I’m aware only X amount of people will qualify for student loan forgiveness

And I should keep secrets to myself

But a reporter know-it-all on TikTok said you’d get an email from the Department of Education if you qualified.

I haven’t received any emails at all

I’m not even certain if I paid anything on my loans or just kept them in good standing

Cuz I’ll get it paid back if I did and will need to pay taxes on it again, like I won the damn lottery – and it would probably put me in a different tax bracket

I’ll worry about that toilet clogging when it clogs

I’ve only just received two letters informing me that my debts were cancelled and that my obligation to pay them is over. Tell the Boomers to deal with it.

My loan providers are no longer allowed to contact me, according to the letters.

The weight is off my shoulders but the worry lines remain…

I’ve been in fight or flight mode so long now I don’t know how to shut it off and just be.

My birthday is next month, on the 19th

I’ve already spoiled myself

I have goals of paying off my 2 credit cards and buying some land not land locked and far far away from a city of despair and demons

I want it to take 15 minutes to walk to my mailbox times two squared

I need an umbrella, not for the rain but for the sun

People will look at me like I’m crazy

Byeee

My student loans were forgiven despite the Boomers wishes…

Posted on July 4, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Color (poems)

He’s the color of rufous
An absolute doofus
He’s the color of sky
With black in his eye

Wish we were exclusive
Instead of reclusive
Like dreaming is lucid
He’s the color of life

21 inch porthole
Thick socks for the cold
The vessel did implode
I guess it didn’t hold

They got crushed
Their vessel was rushed
Now they’re all just dust

Victories not just
The dangers were discussed
Labeled with mistrust

He never told me how much he loved me
Hot sun above me
Make me swoon
Left me for doom

There’s something in the water
I won’t barter
The coverup is worse than the crime
We’ve all lost our mind

Only the beginning
Can’t tell whose winning
The cold is chilling
Earth is spinning
Sun is not forgiving

The rich are the cheapest people
Definitely not my equal

SOS only
And I’m so lonely
My home ain’t homely

My shadow leaves me when it’s dark
When I’m shattered into pieces
And I feel I have no heart

My breath it nearly ceases
A landscape growing stark

I’m running out of patience
I’m afraid I’ll miss my mark
There’s very few releases

Immured in bitterness
It makes no difference
I’m dull, won’t take a risk
Skipping deaths kiss

The sun comes and goes
The ebb and the flows
Midnight lows
The oh’s and the throes
He could heal my soul
Or let it decompose
In the meadows
With the crows

Got the hexes on my exes
Nothing here perplexes
They’re reckless
My math is only guesses

I want to be her
The girl he swoons for
The one he adores
I want her blood on the floor
I want to see her die
Wouldn’t find a tear in my eye
But I’m an amateur

It’s hot and humid
I hate his hubris
Thinks we’re all clueless
Will betray like Judas

I don’t know what’s going on, says the captain
Knowledge lacking
Inside the cabin

Right is forward and left is back
Experts they lack
Inside a tiny shack

The question makes his blood run cold
He’s the Devil you know

If they’re not already dead they will be
That’s what the sources tell me
And I have a feeling that is sinking
With that submarine

I learned a new color name when I ordered a romper and so now it’s in a poem cuz

This rhyme scheme is all over the place just like the chaos in my life

That’s all

More cute rompers incoming

I’m apparently obsessed with buying clothes I will never wear

(Cuz I am a hermit)

Also, why am I so heartbroken over the unsinkable Titan sinking?

It kinda feels like our love?

Exciting but doomed to fail?

Do we get a fancy title?

I’m still completely sober and definitely still fighting off CUD

This is not the cute rompers I mentioned although this too is a romper but more like loungewear – the others are fancy pancy

I ordered this in small and it shipped so hopefully it fits and I got a good bargain for it

It was the last one in stock

OBSESSED and I’ll probably wear it to church or grocery shopping

IT’S NOT LIKE I’M DATING ANYONE

Dying and many people like to be best dressed during their final days

None of my uniforms fit anymore and I sold them at the surplus store for a humiliating price

Ever since TikTok gave me a free coupon, I stopped getting coupons – even though I had many coupons pending, they all disappeared

I hate TikTok and will no longer be shopping over there

Globalism and immigration has destroyed the Land of the Free

There’s nothing to celebrate today

Byeeeee

Posted on June 24, 2023 by poeeternal

Trouble

I got in trouble
For being nice
I guess the good girl
Gets sacrificed

Double penalized on TikTok for leaving a positive review.

Gotta walk on eggshells to avoid a ban.

TikTok rewarded me with a $15 coupon for the ass beating tho.

Then during the live chat to figure out WHY I’m in the doghouse, I was nearly booted for inactivity after being asked to wait 2-3 minutes to sort it…

Damned if I do, damned if I don’t

But the 15 dollar coupon helped…

I was pretty heated after taking time to review and upload photos to help support my review as it’s allowed – only to get penalized for giving a 5* rating…

It’s hell down here…

I bought a romper from the TikTok shopping

And some other things. Better photos when/if I stop breaking out in hives. 🙂

Posted on June 24, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Halo

I can see your halo
Far beyond the payload
Where you might implode
Your sanity erode

I can see your halo
Written in lost code
Changing course the road
Where you rest below

Photo doesn’t belong to me but neither does my hard-earned money.

And I’m finding my most viral videos uploaded on YouTube without my permission, without any payment, without any request of use, without any way to message or contact those using my work, without having downloads turned on for anyone to use at will.

I film a particular way – when I’m shooting the sea, or whatever I’m filming.

It’s all a fucking shitshow and I need 100k followers or something to turn ‘tips’ on.

Recently someone wanted to send me $200 – but they also have invited me to ‘live free’ at one of their condos they own.

Nothing about my life sounds safe or too good to be true.

Furthermore, I had to delete my PayPal, Cash App, and Venmo accounts due to spam and whatnot cuz not even my money is safe.

Banks are shutting down. Billionaires are being offed or are maniacally suicidal risk takers, at the expense of our tax dollars.

I’m not even certain if the IRS is legal.

And the Lie House is funneling our money to criminals in the Ukraine and God knows where else.

I finally put a work order in to service the AC for mold.

Cuz maintenance is always “I don’t smell any mold” but I’m fucking still breaking out in hives, either from a nervous fucking breakdown or actual moldy conditions not noticeable “it’s in the walls” reviews will say…

And I haven’t smoked any weed since May – so I’m past the two week window but it takes a minimum of 4 months to recover from CUD (Cannabis User Disorder) and I still have brain fog.

I’m doing a lot of cleaning tho – and I actually do my laundry and put it away immediately, a slight miracle to not be sleeping next to clean clothes.

I still have no furniture and sleep on the floor and I made another clothing purchase – albeit I slept on the decision first – like I nearly always do.

And even tho the flash code of 25% had already ended, it was still valid further sealing the deal.

I’m obsessed with Dolls Kill boutique and hunt down the cotton stuff, though have bought a few cute sets that were poly blends.

I also got house thangs and shoes which I’ll likely never wear and will stay in the box…

I’m pushing myself to go skating despite the hives and nervous breakdowns.

I bought bath rugs and kitchen oven mits from DK – cuz obsessed

And sales + discount codes on top of sales

You should see the jogger set’s I’ve scored and maybe one day you will

I think I’m looking less hideous than my recent TikTok posts but at least I’m not lying on the bottom of the seafloor in pieces.

So there’s that.

It feels nice getting things in the mail other than spam and bills.

I can’t opt out of the spam and the US post office is selling our data, just like I learned Papa John’s was doing – so I deleted my account (like 2 or 3 years ago) and basically stopped supporting big business.

I should be allowed to order pizza without my data being sold.

I hate (even worse) how society is ran now.

All the pencil dick dictator leaders brownnosing Big China – who wants to nuke us and have us live in fear 24/7

I had another nightmare last night, this time trying to escape zombies.

I’ve not been watching any horror movies or zombie things.

My nightmares always consist of me trying to escape something and finding myself in a closure I cannot escape.

Whether it be a room with no windows or doors, or something else. It’s always the climax I wake up on.

Have to reassure myself, “pew, it was only a dream”

I was consistently going down – hills – roads – grass – indoor walkways at incredible speeds all while trying to avoid the numerous zombies coming after me.

My dreams are always fucking nightmares…

It doesn’t help that the Devil is always after me when I’m awake

I hope I leave the house for something other than food or doctors visits of medical malpractice

Maybe to do something within the community like church or skating

But then I risk the chance of catching Covid or some other disease being spread with malicious intent and purpose

People are always coughing

I literally roll up my car window when I hear a bystander or another rider coughing

My immune system was compromised

I just wanna be home

But this don’t feel like home

It feels like a deathtrap

Just like the unsinkable Titan

TITANic

I take a shit ton of vitamins like immunity support supplements that I have to order from a different country cuz everything is poisoned here

I’m trying to fix my eating habits

And I’m still obsessed with his stories

Which are probably responsible for my nightmares

(I blame war FYI)

My laundry is almost done and I’m craving a shopping dopamine boost

“We have everything we need bb”

“I know but I really want it”

“Okay but this is the last time”

“I’m almost done getting the things I need and at least I’m spending less”

“We get paid soon again”

*sigh*

“Okay but just one more thing…”

I got rid of everything in my life cuz I hated it and told myself we could replace it with things we want/need

I’m in replacement mode but refuse to buy a bed or furniture until I move

The neighbors make me wanna do bad things

The city drives me insane

The entire earth could be Eden but naw, invasive species left and right

“This country was founded on immigration” and they vote with malicious intent and purpose

I may like your stories but I know you voted for Biden and I want to punch you

I’m still homicidal and suicidal but I’m no longer signing waivers

For anything…

Posted on June 24, 2023June 24, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

OceanGate received $450K in pandemic PPP loans to cover payroll costs

OceanGate received $450K in pandemic PPP loans to cover payroll costs
— Read on www.msn.com/en-us/money/other/oceangate-received-450k-in-pandemic-ppp-loans-to-cover-payroll-costs/ar-AA1cWYT4

That’s some fucking bullshite. Stole money from the civilians pockets to fund a future murder/death.

CEO wouldn’t even hire experts. I’m annoyed and angry!!! Voting means absolute shite. This government is nihilistic!!!!!! Satan’s society!!!! Over it!!!!

Posted on June 23, 2023 by poeeternal

The Lie House (The Titan saga)

The Lie House – I mean White House was notified and knew that the explosion was heard and happened on Sunday – yet drug us along – giving us false hope and sensationalized the story – probably as a false flag while other pressing issues were happening – they gave us false hope of a recovery mission knowing damn well the explosion was the Titan and that they were dead

Furthermore this…

Forward Starboard (a poem)

Left and right might be forward and back
Right is forward
Rotate controller
Left is back

Skill issue tbh

Basically something was installed backwards and people in the Titan were stuck and the solution was to reprogram the controller and the guy in the sub said he needed to write this all down

Had to turn the controller sideways to drive the sub

There were so many issues with the unsinkable Titan

But for the Lie House to drag us along is bullshite

THEY KNEW THE EXPLOSION WAS THE TITAN ON SUNDAY

Yet we all worried they were down there suffering or potentially could be rescued

The GoT damn gaslighting this administration does

Urzlutxlutdlutuljg lufzhfxlutxlljgxyrxjfxuxxdo lutzxgi

I’m highly emotionally invested in this saga

Even though our government is funneling money to Ukraine and approving lab grown meats or some shite

I need to disassociate from politics and turn my cheek to the unsinkable Titan

Hopefully I can write a better poem than the one above which is basically word for word nearly of the insanity unfolding about the Titan

I was convinced they were dead Sunday when coms suddenly stopped but they convinced me otherwise that hope might be near the vicinity when they knew damn well of an explosion

“We hear banging sounds every 30 minutes”

Fucking criminals need to be hung *insert something* from the tallest tree

I was convinced they were dead on Sunday when coms were lost but noooooo they made me doubt myself when I knew

They withheld pertinent details about the case

We’re living in a manmade hell

Putsutclutzlurzuzyrjv ufzfsluruslyr

That’s all…

I did more shopping and more cleaning and that’s basically how my Friday went

I found a skate center AND CALLED

So hopefully I’m closer to my goal and once I go it’ll be hard to stop

Just gotta make that first step

Admission is like $8 bucks I think but I only inquired about hours and if I could bring my own skates…

I might even get a piece of cardboard pizza cuz who goes skating without eating the junk food?

I haven’t been skating since I was a kid/teenager and tbh don’t know why I stopped doing the things I love

They even have “adult night” which goes til late but I’d rather go during daylight

Nothing good ever happens after dark…

P.S. they died in fear – don’t be fooled by “there was no pain” – they absolutely felt pain briefly – and the cracking was enough to put fear mode on

The goal is to not die in fear

Pain is inevitable

Unless you’re lucky enough to go in your sleep

P.S.S. Here’s a TikTok video from where I grabbed those screenshots: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8JpJ8gh/

I hope I can come up with a better poem or maybe him…

P.S.S.S. I wish some of my neighbors were on the bottom of the sea…

Posted on June 22, 2023 by poeeternal

The son didn’t want to go…

Y’all the son was terrified to go – didn’t want to go – didn’t listen to his intuition – only wanted to bond with his dad – as the trip fell on Father’s Day weekend – he died in fear – as if it couldn’t be anymore heartbreaking

The parents first priority should have been keeping him safe

They could have bonded over dinner and a movie – it shouldn’t take extreme events to form a bond with your parents

My God…

Gut wrenching

Bless his heart

He was only 19 – a teenager – and the frontal lobe doesn’t fully form until age 25

He was just a kid…

A young man just getting into manhood

Not quite an adult yet

And fuck anyone who says otherwise

NINETEEN – TEEN – TEENAGER

How fucking dense are you?

I think those little red flags are messages from God – our intuition – that gut feeling

That we all seem to ignore

And often it cost us our lives

He shouldn’t have been allowed to go on an unregulated experimental deep dive sub – with zero experience

He didn’t even want to go…

And, there’s a video of the CEO bragging that you would hear “creaking sounds” and alarms warning if the hull would implode

You shouldn’t have to risk your life to get the love and care you need from a parent

As if, I couldn’t hate parents even more…

The aunt said he had a “terrible feeling” so sad

Parents aren’t worth dying for

And now they’ll never bond again

He died in fear, I know he did

His dad likely didn’t give a fuck about his kid – or his safety

Making him sign all those waivers…

Peer pressure

Fuck everything…

“Why do you care about the kid”

BECAUSE I DO

People aren’t worth dying for

Listen to your intuition

Little messages from God

Or 6000+ years of evolution

But he was smart enough to know something was off…

He kept crawling in that hole – for others

Only his hole was a sealed up tin can

And yeah, you absolutely feel the pain of being blown up – you do – even if it goes fast – you experience hell

That tin can started making all kinds of noise

He died in fear

19… just a fucking baby

Meanwhile, some elder just turned 100…

ONE HUNDRED

There are many ways I don’t want to die.

Posted on June 22, 2023 by poeeternal

Worse Case Scenario

Worse case scenario
Not the way to go
But it happened so
12,000 feet below

Vessel or coffin?
You be the judge then

The hope is very thin
And little stretched within
Hope is not high
It’s barely surfacing

They’re starting to find debris from the unsinkable Titan…

I don’t think a teenager is capable of mitigating the risk involved.

This comment is terrible but why did I laugh? Like damn….

People absolutely hate billionaires. The comments unfolding…

It’s safe to say, they’re no longer suffering.

I haven’t slept in days so probably some spelling mishaps.

I’ve slept a little that were filled with tossing and nightmares.

Grateful to still be fighting for my life. Having shoppers guilt and I don’t understand why.

Mostly think “what’s the point, will I even live long enough to enjoy it”

Followed by “my sister died at 45, buy the stuff”

Followed by “we could be dead tomorrow so what’s the point”

Followed by “I really want it”

Followed by “I know”

Why am I having buyers guilt? Not remorse? Cuz I do not regret anything in my closet.

I mostly regret being sick and dying…

I told myself I’ll stop shopping eventually

LIKE WHAT ELSE IS THERE TO DO

I’m not even doing it for views…

It’s the first time I’ve ever owned clothing I actually like

I’m no longer spending hundreds of dollars monthly on medicinal that made me worse

And I know I need to move but it ain’t happening overnight

Long ago I could pack up and drive around, look at a few places, and get a key

It’s no longer that easy or affordable

I’ll likely be just as miserable and my AC is probably full of mold

Putting a work order in…

Rent increase in August but it’s still 3 or 4 times cheaper than a 1 bedroom elsewhere

Damned if I do, damned if I don’t

And I did get new carpet here

I’m just gonna keep fixing it up

Until I have land + a tent

But there’s cracks in the ceiling

CRACKS IN THE CEILING

I fear sinkholes

Also Florida is in hurricane season nearly again

I’ve lived through THREE hurricanes here

2 of them I lost power over a week…

In the summer heat…

I’m sure that’s excellent for moldy conditions

And Wolfy hasn’t shown her face since I screamed bloody murder twice

She probably wanted me to feed her like I do the other house spider

I have terrible arachnophobia

I’m pretty much scared of everything

I think she’s gonna have babies and need to relocate the sack

But she’s guarding it

This isn’t going as planned and I keep feeding her

I’m turning into a witch and Halloween commences August 31st this year – hopefully still alive to wear my cute Halloween themed outfits (throughout XMAS)

Clothing gives me a reason to live

Do other people feel guilty spending money on things they want and need?

I did say I wanted to start over and got rid of 95% of my belongings which I hated and brought me zero joy

It sucks because I have zero family or friends to confide in

I have to be my own best friend and say “baby girl buy it”

And then I thank myself and God and God and God when I do…

Cuz I’m grateful but ain’t allowed to let my neighbors know…

Any time I drive I bless my car and thank her

Do other people talk to spiders and machines?

Posted on June 22, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Last Breaths

Taking their last breaths now
And hope
I don’t know how
But will they ever be found?

They didn’t even glimpse the thing they died for…

Or are dying for currently

The only up-to-date realtime updates was a page of ads and a “download app to read more…”

Journalism is dead

The Internet has died

So I’ll stick with my TikTok newsfeed

Everyone is a fucking submarine expert now

Jesus it’s awful how they’re dying

I preferred thinking they died via implosion

Being buried alive is literally the worst way to go

Maybe someone had a watch with a little light….

Still it’s not promising

I’m so distraught I had to disassociate during the night

I don’t do anything to disassociate with anymore

No alcohol, no drugs

Does the hull implode when the o2 is completely gone?

The less they have the quicker it goes?

I need answers we will likely never have

We had laws that existed for a long time that protected people from doing stupid shit

Now anyone can sell anything anywhere

And they are hiring psychopaths who are damaging our food supply

This country was founded on immigration!!!!!!!!

I’m sick of it all!

I hated watching everyone do what the Boomers told them to do when I was 5

Boomers hold most of House and sold America out long ago

“Sins of the fathers”

Florida no longer requires a carry permit

Pro 2A

Armed and dangie…

That CEO was able to convince a few that his unsinkable submarine was the safest vehicle of all vehicles

Delusional

Lots of evidence coming out to support this

Narcissism is a plague

A drowning man will drown another

That teenager who was only 19 – hence TEENager should not been allowed to go

The Titanic should be left alone as a gravesite

Otherwise, let’s go see John Jones!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Think of the $$$$$$$$$ to be made

People have lost their souls

Fuck everything

Miracles don’t exist

Just dumb luck

I liked the idea better of thinking they went quickly, as cold as it sounds

96 hours of regret in something you can’t get out of

Sealed in

Naw, not worth dying for to see the dead

They failed their risk assessment

And that kid didn’t have the frontal lobe developed fully to weigh such consequence

Sometimes sheer luck saves you

Sometimes

I think God can save your soul but he doesn’t intervene with freewill

Some people escape death through circumstance, sheer will and luck

I don’t want to burn in hell cuz the Boomers are leading the world off a cliff

FUCK CHINA

Posted on June 21, 2023June 21, 2023 by poeeternal · 3 Comments

Question (and poem)

How does a battery work in the cold?

That tin can submarine was electric

The CEO stated in an interview, the battery was being worked on, so he didn’t want to turn it on, right before he tossed the controller

The battery died? Not the controller battery but the main?

So they would’ve lost buoyancy and sunk to the bottom

They’re not floating in the middle

They’re either top or bottom

I just have a bad feeling about all this

So poem…

The risk doesn’t outweigh the reward
They’re stuck on the sea floor
With nothing to explore
I wonder what they’re living for

They may not be gone yet, but time is nearly out…

It’s either up or down, there’s no middle ground…

This thing spells bad luck, many don’t give a fuck…

More chitter chat cuz squirrel is my spirit animal

Grateful to have a floor to stretch out on

New bed when I move, that’s the deal

Meanwhile, more clothes were bought today.

Just a few…

And… the face serum I’m using from Victoria Health, is actually improving my skin tone, some of the weathered spots aren’t as dark – but I woke up to a nasty comment – in which I immediately blocked user – he stated, “nothing worth moaning about”

First off, I moan about everything

Secondly, the vitamins are saving my life

And my skin has improved

So will likely get something for my hair and body next, as I learned most shampoo and conditioner causes hair loss…

And that missing package cost a pretty penny

The mailman didn’t even put the correct term as it stated it was left with an individual, which meant some motherfucker stole my package

Turns out it was in the lockbox, and I wasn’t given the key

I shook hands with the mailman and all was forgiven

But I lit a fire under the post offices ass and it was a pain in the ass filing out that declaration of honor for the UK – but I was happy to email VH back and say package found!!!

It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to…

They have about 9 hours of air remaining

That robot submarine they are sending down, can’t bring them up, only help get them unstuck if they’re stuck

I think it’s safe to say they’re stuck regardless

But some answers will be nice

Have they imploded?

Are they still alive?

What an expensive way to die

Honestly, I’m hoping for the best

I learned another sub was saved with only 12 minutes remaining

But they weren’t on the sea floor

I don’t know if they gave us false hope just to $$$$$ use more resources and bill the government whom the tax payers will pay

This is coming out of our pockets, this rescue/recovery

RIP John Jones

The experts are trained to not become a casualty

They don’t do shit…

But sit on the clock $$$$

Time/energy is $$$

And I ain’t Einstein…

They say don’t eat late at night but it’s when I’m most hungry…

I’m HUNGRY

And I can’t stop thinking about that damn electric submarine – I mean submersible

He was invested in his electric toys

He was in debt

A drowning man will drown another

If a Baby Boomer jumped from a bridge would you follow

Wait, that’s not how it goes

If a boomer led you off a cliff, would you follow…

Wait… I forget how it goes…

5 bucks says that CEO is a boomer…

Posted on June 21, 2023 by poeeternal

Sources

If they’re not already dead they will be
That’s what the sources tell me
And I have a feeling sinking
With that submarine…

I need to move from this shithole before I die

Posted on June 21, 2023 by poeeternal

Deep

They are deep in trouble
With moments to spare
Or maybe blown to rubble
Is there any hope down there?

Posted on June 21, 2023June 21, 2023 by poeeternal

Astronomical (poem)

It’s astronomical odds
To be saved
I hear no applauds
At the depths they braved

Free speech, prayer, and rage…

Their oxygen levels run out 7 am Thursday morning – 96 hours was all they had

Maybe shouldn’t have brought the teenager

Wonder if they’ve panicked and used up O2 or remained calm, if still alive…

So much effort to find and save the crew

It’d be an absolute miracle and maybe one we need

I feel so bad for them, I do

But my go-to is to get angry when someone dies or is dying

The audacity

To die on my watch

I don’t deal with death well at all

Sometimes I go silent

Sometimes I laugh

Mostly I get angry

And then cry…

I can’t imagine being stuck in that tin can

He swore no matter what happened it was safe

Lying and gaslighting should be illegal

I fucking hate this world

Demons everywhere

No wonder I’m so miserable

And was before I was born

I had awareness

Understood language

I didn’t want to be born

All my life tragically suicidal

They’ve made assisted suicide legal in Canada

Folks getting approved for anything

Nihilistic environment

Nihilistic government

Separation from God

Science is nihilism

My heart is so heavy for them, in that tuna can

One person said, “they have no water” followed by “it’s dripping with condensation”

*rolls eyes

They all took a sandwich and bottle of water

And if the tuna can is dripping with condensation – uhm – drinky?

At least they have a toilet with a view they can’t see through

I’m not getting any sleep tonight

Bless

The ocean terrifies me

I got my kitchen tidied up and plan to shop for God grown foods soon – hopefully not poisoned

Need some comforting homemade soup

Glad to have feet on ground

And able to keep moving

Not ready to die

I am breathing deeper now, like can get air to my belly

Must focus on the gains

The fact that I can take deep breath’s again

Terrified to do anything cuz people are unhinged and insane

My neighbors make me want to commit some crimes

Without remorse

The will it takes to not snap

All these monster men killing their children and family but keeping the mom alive – for revenge

Need hung immediately

Narcissism is a plague

But these monsters need to be rid of the earth

Let’s start with Chyna

And the de-lites

Bless their hearts, the ones lost at sea

The regret they must feel

The anger

The delusional CEO is probably convinced they will be found

Probably will gaslight them until the end

It will be nothing short of a miracle if they are found alive

I don’t know what lessons God has for us here

We have freewill

I don’t know why John kept crawling in that fucking hole

“I thought I was somewhere else on the map”

“I thought it would open up”

Panic – he was thinking and he was given an incorrect map

That section should have been blocked off after two boys got trapped inside

I’m just so fucking mad!!!!

At the nurses, at the doctors, at the Chinese!!!!!!!!!!

Don’t want any of them in my feed!!!!

Give them angry looks when I’m out and about!!!!

IDGAF

The first Bible can be traced back to Asia

You think I’m gonna smile at the Devil!!!

I have fury!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop micromanaging me!

Stop hacking me!!!!!

Fuck off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have you ever seen lightning on the ocean?

P.S. I think earth was a frozen planet, we maybe hit another planet and was pushed closer to the Sun’s orbit, things melted – but why is this never discussed in science?

And does science take into account that objects are closer than they appear – with those mirrors they use to peer?

I’m telling you, the math is fucking wrong

The darkness can act as a mirror

And the famous speech from the moon happened on earth

Aliens aren’t real

Area 51 is where they rehearsed the moon landings

Aliens aren’t real

It’s American propaganda

Most “alien sightings” happen in America

The dumbest nation

Thanks to China

Ch ch chyna can burn in hell

For all eternity

Our enemy is Asia

And most disease comes from Africa

And white people are less prone to disease

White slavery is real

The Great race war is real

I wanna fuck them up

You don’t know the dreams I have

The nightmares….

God scares me but the Devil don’t

WEAK CHARACTERS – wake up!!!

Get right with God

The great judgment is coming…

Hell is already here

Posted on June 21, 2023 by poeeternal

Sunk (poetry)

I am absolutely invested emotionally in this lost submarine

So poetry…

All the money in the world won’t save them
And there’s banging from the deep, there’s mayhem
All the prayers for them now, feel like a sunken gem
Who do we fault, who do we condemn?

“It has one button, that’s it”
Says the narcissist

5 are dead or dying
While some are crying
Other’s are denying
Trouble underlying

Remote
Like our love
A breach in hull
Shipwrecked is soul

Crushed is hope
But do you know the scope
An uncertified submarine
Nightmare or dream?

Dark waters turn crimson
But no one will listen
When you hear the cries
The thunder in the skies
The dead have gone missing
They were on a mission
Straight to extinction
Race against affliction

It’s a dead giveaway
You’re going to die today

Sorrows sorrows prayers
The state of affairs
Endless nightmares
Electric chairs
Tell me someone cares

You need to leave but you’re not free to go
The cop combo

Never get on the bad side of a good girl
You will see her form
Like hail in storm
She ain’t lukewarm

I need to focus on the gains
And not the mishaps
Sometimes I think I’ve gone insane
But no one gives a crap

He’s like driving on a floating road
And I ain’t going slow

He’s like riding in a truck without breaks
That’s the speed it takes

Walking in the underground
I’m a ghost and he is the crowd

“Loose lips
Sink ships”

It’s unfortunate
The people who need help
Can’t be helped

It’s always the same color crayon
The same con
The Devil’s spawn
Hanging on my lawn
So they get a yawn
Wish they’d move on
Back to Babylon
Where they’re coming from
Fucking hate them all

I wish I had no father
Why even bother
Poison like still water
I wish I had more honor

Why does the sun
Travel in a straight line
Like your lines
From pen to mind

He hits on his own reflection
He’s gaslighting every direction
He says he loves with affection
He’s in love with his own perfection

Some need more than one chance
To change the circumstance
Don’t want the last dance

Michael Leavitt deserves to crawl into a hole he can’t get out of
As below, so above

I’m just barely existing
Time is ticking
Grave persisting
Death resisting

I don’t want realistic
Fuck sadistic
I’m humanistic
Ain’t optimistic

I must be dead inside
Soul paralyzed
Know not to cry

She’s not me
Still do I slide into her clothes
Like midnight over moon
I am all
And I am none

I start the trends
I rarely follow
I live in pretense
Hard pills to swallow

Til death do us part
We ain’t got the heart
Black and full of rot
We’re both distraught
No grave for plot

I don’t get the physics
Or why he never visits
Says it ain’t my business
Why he acts suspicious

Why are you under my teeth?
Beneath my seams?
Between my dreams?
Light like moonbeams?

Time moves slower in the cold
His heart is indigo
Take me where blue blood will flow
His undertow
The place I grow

He steals the sun and turns it into limelight
His pen will give me frostbite

Collecting comments
Crashing comets
Trashy content
Make me vomit

Demons look like humans
Cheaters look like keepers
Users look like friends
Children look like men
Do not attempt
To understand

I want you well
But not better than me

Some thoughts….

I haven’t been able to sleep and my entire FYP is the lost submarine

I actually hope and pray they are found. It would be nothing short of a miracle. However, they sent two subs down (unmanned presumably) that got crushed at 6000 ish meters

I had a comment get over 1600 likes – and got annoyed with all the notifications – so deleted it

I commented a teenager shouldn’t be on board, many said he was 19

I replied NINETEEN – TEEN

And still – they denied

Had to block – got annoyed

I wish we could mute comment notifications but naw

So delete – it just wouldn’t stop getting likes or comments

I’m an introvert I suppose

Sidenote

Apparently the CEO was in a lot of trouble and he was a good gaslighter and salesman to convince those people to die with him – I don’t think a teenager (yes nineteen is still a teen) should be allowed on an experimental submarine dive 12,500 feet below the sea. It doesn’t matter what fancy title you give them.

That CEO stated over and over that sub was entirely safe, “if this goes… “safe”, if that goes… “safe” but sign this waiver

Look, I signed a waiver getting that motherfucking vaccine and I will never trust another doctor or nurse again – I was asking all the right questions but I was gaslit, gullible, and lied to

And even tho the first vaccine fucked me up, I crawled further in the hole, just like our dear John Jones…

It nearly killed me and I’m at risk for Adult Sudden Death syndrome

I cannot stress this enough, adrenaline spikes to the heart is a no-go

I workout but not to the extreme

I fucking ran through the Dollar 25 tree with 2 gallons of spring water and it was a no no and that was recently

I was in my car going, “it’s okay we’re safe now, I won’t do that again”

So I can run and jog but not with added weights

It’s ridiculous but if you knew how far I’ve crawled – to get better, you might be a tiny bit proud

I’m feeling stronger but can’t do adrenaline spikes at all…

And I’m only 108 pounds

I also have to be careful with extreme temperatures, the hot and cold

I’m like Goldie Locks, need everything just right…

I’m not out of the dark yet and may never be…

The light is so much more powerful than the dark

Also, they stated you wouldn’t be able to hear banging that deep down – something about sound not traveling through the cold

I find that interesting

Isn’t space cold?

I hope God can hear my screams…

I do feel bad about them being stuck at the bottom of the sea

Maybe they didn’t explode

Maybe they made up the banging to keep the search ongoing and the $$$$ flowing

A fast death seemed a little less cruel than suffocating in the dark and cold in a sealed up tuna can

Where you can’t even stand…

Or hyperventilate

With only a sandwich and bottle of water

The one window was plexiglass

A freaking fish tank

You couldn’t pay me a million to get bolted in that tin

I need to get back to my FYP and I feel less guilty about buying clothes now – that’s a much better decision than sinking to the bottom of the sea to explore a graveyard

But I was fucking stupid for getting that 2nd vaccine

I’m learning to forgive myself for a lot of things

I have been dying a slow and painful death

And there are people on my black list

Lucky buying clothes is all I’m planning to do…

LUCKY

Cuz the daydreams are filled with revenge tenfold

I promise when I’m feeling better than dead I will post some of my cute clothing

Mostly dressing comfy for now…

And appreciative I have a floor to sleep on

My sister died of Covid age 45

I don’t want to die…

But everything is actively trying to kill me

The water, the food, the air, it’s all been poisoned

I HATE CHINA

Posted on June 20, 2023June 20, 2023 by poeeternal · 10 Comments

Billionaires

All these billionaires dropping dead and he thought it was a good idea to visit a graveyard at the bottom of the ocean?

Money can’t buy common sense

They went down in a little tincan “submarine” – the “unsinkable sub” – sounds like by the expert that it imploded about an hour and a half in…

So they didn’t even make it to the gravesite, I mean Titanic

Do you think orcas were involved?

I’m kinda team orca

And, they were watching it from a little TV from inside?

Hope he likes his grave buddies

I don’t really have a good solid feeling about this

I don’t have any feels at all

Dead inside

Blame the boomers

The news is all about this billionaire being rescued – when no rescue is actually possible

Meanwhile, China wants to nuke the USA

A poem or two…

When billionaires go missing
So do my feelings

But I don’t care how much he is worth
I don’t care you are butt hurt

Why are you ghosting me
Do you love me endlessly

Let the dead be
It shouldn’t be a novelty

The expert says imploded but I think the orcas were involved but what the fuck do I know?

No amount of money would get me in that tincan and go to the bottom of the sea (12,500 feet?)

Formula: feet ÷ 5,280 = miles Calculations: 15,000 feet ÷ 5,280 = 2.84090909 miles Result: 15,000 feet is equal to 2.84090909 miles

(I cheated)

So it’s nearly 3 miles deep underground

That doesn’t sound too deep – but you got the crushing pressure of the ocean

Yeah it’s a big fat solid NO for me

You couldn’t pay me a billion to go…

And they controlled the submarine with a Nintendo controller

And parts from Amazon

Surprised that thing lasted 4 times

There are some really good salesmen out there

They controlled that thing with a game controller

“Made in China”

Do you think it caught a leak and imploded?

Did the orcas cause the leak?

Did the controller die?

That was a disaster waiting to happen

China is threatening to nuke us…

Why isn’t that all over the news?

Fuck China and those little rats

People comment “God first” when I have no feelings

I serve God, not demons or man

They won’t understand

Delusional

Let’s not talk about the dead?

People think they are suffering in fear with X amount of oxygen remaining

Naw

That ping disappeared – they were crushed (maybe)

Probably happened so fast they didn’t know what hit them

An orca?

The curse of the Titanic?

Dumb luck?

The did have a little window near the shitbox

I don’t know how many red flags you need

NASA let the space shuttle implode despite 99% of the team warning them that bad weather was a no no

I remember watching hoping it would explode

It did

I’m not to blame

Just wanted everyone as miserable as me

I was 10

I’ve had many predictions come true

NASA – welp 1 person – was more concerned with image than safety

They knew the ship needed repairs

But told the civilians it was safe and like a commercial flight

Just like they took that unsinkable submarine down with a game controller

You ain’t fooling me

I am fucking gullible tho

But thank goodness I fear everything and am a land animal

I especially fear the ocean

Team Bear and Orca

Stop killing the bears cuz you get too close

God 1st

Man zero

Blame the Boomers and the demons who fearmonger and keep us in fight or flight mode 24/7

Delusional

WAKE UP

Posted on June 16, 2023June 16, 2023 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

TikTok is going to ban me (poetry)

Content restored
After it was deleted
And just for record
I’m fucking heated

Free speech like sword
I feel defeated
Where’s my reward
Always mistreated

They ain’t getting another dime from me

Also, I blocked said user & every one they were following

I’m hardcore

*goes shopping anywhere but TikTok for a dopi boost*

K, thanx, bye

T3 Sara mode & Florida no longer requires a carry permit *weapons nearby*

Posted on June 16, 2023 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Muse (poetry)

He’s still writing for his muse
Under the full moon
I’m still walking in her shoes
With the cold blues

Oh hi

Freckles brought to you by the sun (no filter or sunscreen)

Byeeee

Posted on June 13, 2023 by poeeternal

Web (easy rhyme)

Web of secrets
Facetious
In sequence
No thesis
He’s my weakness
Lost allegiance
Sin’s leakage
I’m sleepless
A grievance
Stupid genius
Love Jesus

Posted on June 12, 2023June 12, 2023 by poeeternal

Distractions (easy rhyme)

There’s too many distractions
Can’t even read a book
Unless it is your writings
Then I may get a second look

🙂

Why does light travel in a straight line? Why does something round move straight? I haz questions.

Free speech below be warned

The way John Jones died keeps me awake at night.

Maybe get some land in Utah. Do a low crawl. Whip out the hacksaw. Call me an outlaw.

I’m still breaking out in hives. I did a 30 day raw ginger detox and hit it TOO hard. I’m not a sweater but first shot broke out in sweats. Kept going tho.

Nearly fell asleep last night until the consequences of John’s action really settled in.

Must be the worst way to go.

He didn’t even wanna be there. Just thought he could show off a little. He was wanting to eat some Turkey. Or maybe dressing.

I’m not gonna be able to rest until somebody pulls him out of that hole.

Recovery mission.

Use a robot, I don’t care!

Get him out of there!

Cuz I don’t learn my lessons well either.

2nd week felt nauseous after every shot and by the third, hives.

Guess I’m preparing myself for the end

I really really don’t want a traumatic ending

My whole life has been a tragedy

So Cracker Barrel has a cancer warning on their website that eating their food will expose you to bad stuff

And when you click on more info, it won’t tell you exactly which foods

This is what happens when other countries rule us and the Great Race war theory is reality

Check the fucking CENSUS

Reports say certain Chinese Americans (how they prefer) identify as “the new white”. They even get common names like John or Michael.

Certain Mexicans also identify as “the new white”

And BLM is up 230%

I don’t know where I’m going, but I can’t stay here

Land is cheap near Yellow Stone

Pros: cheap

Cons: near volcano

People have been boiled alive at the acidic hot springs

They are my favorite natural wonder and the one’s I fear the most

Always wanted to visit but have this feeling it would pop

Many scientists and people have died from volcanic eruptions randomly

I would have been driven mad living with demons inside a cave

Who constantly gaslight

I don’t know if I believe in reincarnation but sometimes I feel like I’m still learning a lesson from 6000 years ago

China needs to take a chill pill

Most of us are fairly fed up

Eating raw salad today

Maybe just need to stick to a raw diet forevermore

Fucking sick of dying a slow tormentious!?! death

You ever be drifting off to sleep until something bad makes your eyelids pop wide?

For me, last night, it was JJ.

I need an old typewriter

I probably could just use pen and paper again

Ink sucks these days

I hate AI

I’m always writing from my phone

One little tap at a time

Constantly correcting the algorithm

It likes to not space

It likes to change words on me

I’m basically sick of the narcissism which is a plague

But any article you read will state, “narcissism is rare”

Believe none of what you read and less of what you see

He was suppose to take the one that had claw marks all above

But he probably was dared or gaslit to go in the wrong one

It was 9pm at night

He should have been in bed

His wife re-married 3 years later

I ain’t been married once

Some people have it too easy

China has the most ridiculous dictator’s who are nihilistic and their own policies have made it hard for them to recover as a whole due to the “one child law” and I hope they fall but they are stealing white man’s identity with malicious intent and purpose and American names…

I’m allowed to be angy….

I’m sick of being micromanaged

And poisoned

Got some more rhyme incoming but freestyled this as soon as I opened my eyes

Couldn’t even brush my teeth first – already rhyming

Brain still foggy

When I was 16, I would break out in hives every night because of the stressors

For several months, I had to take Benadryl at bedtime

I was even put in a rehab against my will for a month solid, wasn’t able to communicate with boys, had to do stupid meetings

Escaped the insane asylum so many times they had to re-write the rules every time

Sometimes locked myself in my room and refused to come out, using my body and feet against the walls to stop them from breaking in

Demanded air time (fresh air) cuz I was on suicide watch most of the time, not allowed to go outside, not allowed to shave my legs

Broke out in hives every fucking night there

Left the leader tho…

Eventually I was released

My parents were the only ones to not show for the final week to do therapy

It was clear who the fucking problem was and why I was breaking out in hives

I wasn’t supposed to be there

The same John wasn’t supposed to be in that hole

“There are things that happened down there that will never be disclosed”

Yeah like what though?

I can still remember the name of the boy I sat next to in 2nd grade

We made up a game

We’d draw little maps of roads and the other would hold the pencil while the other held the paper to “drive”

We did this quietly and after assignments were done

And every time the teacher re-arranged where students sat, we were allowed to still sit next to one another

Cuz we both got angry and probably refused to do assignments lol

I went skating a lot back then

And even at 16, had rollerblades and would go street blading for hours

I bought me a brand new pair of skates at Christmas, but still haven’t been 😦

So I really hope I change that soon

I know I have a valid excuse “dying” but damn

One day we won’t be able to do the things we want, even if we wanted

I don’t want that day to sneak up on me

It’s like I’m still stuck in a hole I can’t crawl out

And no one’s coming to save me

We have to save ourselves

But God does listen

And prayers do come true

Sometimes

Within reason

Or it’s just l-u-c-k (labor under controlled knowledge)

But I still believe in God

And I don’t know how I survived my teenage years

The quarries, the 50 foot bridge jumps, the standing in front of trains

Suicidal yep

Even in the womb….

Didn’t even want to be born

And don’t want to die….

Posted on June 10, 2023 by poeeternal · 9 Comments

I gave up weed

So yo

Remember how the state gave me an addiction with malicious intent and purpose

And I regretted voting for medicinal

And the Russian hydroponics was making me MORE suicidal and homicidal

And I wasn’t getting any sleep

And it was making my anxiety worse

But I couldn’t quit

But it wasn’t working

Albeit the CBD did help my heart

But then it no longer worked

And God was like, “I don’t want you dissociating anymore”

And someone where I live was busted with 37k in their car, with fentanyl laced street weed

So I knew I couldn’t/wouldn’t fall prey to the cravings

And it was posted all over the cops social media

So I let my card expire with malicious intent and purpose

And I thought I was gonna die if I didn’t get a drag

And I started looking in places where I knew there wasn’t any weed

And it got ridiculous the places I was looking

Even tho I never hid any cuz quitting

Well, I’ve been off everything for awhile now

The brain fog is lifting

I still get cravings

But then I buy some clothing and get a dopamine boost

Because God said I didn’t have to die broke or naked

And, my closet is nearly full with clothing that fits me

Mostly cotton clothing and not polyester

But now that I’m nearly done with my shopping spree

I can figure out where I’m moving

And hopefully it’s on a plot of land 1-5 acres

So I can leave this moldy infested dump which is actually killing me

But moving isn’t as easy as it once was

And I’m actually still dying

So don’t wanna live in my ride or die

So yep

Officially weed free like 2 months + now

It takes a minimum of 4 months to recover from CUD (cannabis user disorder)

And sometimes I’m looking in random spots

I hopes to find a cartridge

That will never be there

And tossed out my pipes n papers n things

I did buy a jar worth on 4/19 and kinda weened myself

But it’s practically low grade once you’ve been puffing on the 80% thc bits like a bottle

But eventually that too ran out

I tossed out the dirty pipes to not clean the resin and taint my lungs

My lungs are still healing

And my heart from those damn vaccines

So it did serve its purpose

But I knew with the amount I was buying and the amount I was smoking and still not falling asleep that something was wrong

I knew I had to quit

It’s not that I can’t afford it

It was an absolute waste

I was tossing my $$$ in the wind

And just chasing a dragon I was never gonna find

I followed the $$$ trail back to Russia

It was Russian weed

(Stay away from Curaleaf)

(Unless you want to become homicidal and suicidal)

(More than you thought you were)

Also, there are 2 spiders living in my house

1 is unwanted and roams around

The other is stationary and I feed her

She understands me

The other one is fast and jumps and harmless (wolf spider)

The other is unidentified but I help her feed

A few weeks ago she had her web connected to my trash can lid

And 3 times I got in it and she popped down

I told her “no, you’re gonna starve, that’s me, you gotta fix yer web”

She immediately did

Today I told her I was gonna find her a meal, to fix up her web

An hour later I returned and she was working on her web

I have fed her twice now and it creeps me out

She could be a harmless Florida house spider or a dangerous one

But she’s chill

And enjoys collecting the dew when I’m taking extremely hot showers

The wolf spider is scared of me

I tried catching her the other day

She jumped

I nearly died

She’s not dangerous but she’s mobile

And I’m a good/bad witch depending on the day

I killed her mom once and cried for six months

It didn’t want to die and I was yelling “I’m sorry” while murdering her

So I’ve decided to learn to live with them

Wolfy doesn’t want to be relocated

This is her home now

I’m moving out

Come April

If the mold doesn’t kill me before then

I got an air purifier and reside in one room

I should post a sign: No spiders allowed

The one that isn’t dangerous terrifies me

They get mistaken by *im not summoning it*

The other one could be dangerous but she listens to me

I’ve fed her two live meals

It freaked me out to see her go into kill/eat mode

She mostly lingers underneath the top edge of the bathroom sink with her web along the wall and toilet

I have 2 bathrooms but she likes mine

My home isn’t really dirty but it could be better

This place was built ontop a swamp

Sick buildings exist (even new ones)

For 30 years folks were diagnosed with Sick Building Syndrome

Until they forced the doctor to stop doing his job

Maybe I can find a run down place and fix it up

Happy little clouds

And walls

I’m gonna leave this place better than I found it

And I’m sleeping on the floor

As 95% of my furniture and belongings are gone

Starting over but not here

Anyhoo

Tis all

I’m entirely sober

No drinky

No smokey

No escape

Will probably stop buying clothing soon

And keep looking for the escape route

The cop said “all of Daytona is bad” so already know I don’t want anywhere near this county

Need in the country

Of Florida

Would legit feed the gators

And there’s some sort of possum enjoying all the treats I toss out

Spotted her again today 🙂

Worry about them so much

They cut down most of their habitat

Kept hearing cries that bothered me

So started feeding them my trail mixes

And the cries turned into chipping and song

My ark will be land ho

Anyway there’s yer boring update

I live with spiders and fears

There’s no escaping here?

Spiders are animals

I even got a nat to understand me

So either I got some sort of special power

Or everything is sentient

You should see how Squirrel looks at me

She will even eat with her back turned away

She’s trusting

One day I hope a squirrel will crawl on me like a tree

I have goals you see

6th mass extinction

Science is nihilism

Scientists reduced the honeybees lifespan to 50% so they would work harder

Unethical

No one is talking about that when they say “save the bees”

Mold and fungas interchange /shapeshift

They like sugar and starch and nihilism

The Great Filter is alive

It’s the fucking devil

Tell me I’m wrong

They say you have to leave the environment to get well

I’m in hell

No one is saving that forest in Oregon? being eaten by fungas for 2500 years?

Still, I won’t kill the shrooms with teeth when they pop up

I hate mushrooms, never liked eating them

They ain’t yer fucking friend

And I won’t sleep tonight with Wolfy running around

*sigh* spotted Wolfy again

~~She~~ I needs a new home

Got some cute pants that quickly sold out! Love them!!!!! Small is almost too big where XS is almost too tight but I have been getting lots of shorts in xs!

They stopped making B cup bras. So bralettes I guess forevermore

Petite people don’t matter

“Eat a burger” they say

I’m like “are you buying”!?!?!?!

All I do is fucking eat

I don’t live in the gym

I’m going to upgrade my rebounder soonish

And still haven’t gone skating 😦

But desperately wanna

I ain’t safe here

I’m gonna hit the rink or skate park soon I pray

I wish I had friends other than spiders….

And ghosts….

P.S. I heart God

Posted on June 10, 2023June 10, 2023 by poeeternal

Tarmac (poem)

“We want your feedback”
Too bad my feelings you lack
Like roses are black
Take the tarmac

My opinion comes with a price. If you ain’t paying, I ain’t slaying.

Stop leaving reviews for companies to control you

Whatever you like, they will fuck it up

Over society

Posted on June 10, 2023 by poeeternal · 3 Comments

How? (poetry)

How do you do it?
Take my mess?
And turn it into puzzle?
Six foot hole with shovel?
Buried deep is trouble?
Humming like you’re humble?
Dear it’s never subtle?

Collecting comments
Crashing comets
Trashy content
Make me vomit

Cross with commas / burned diplomas / stank aromas / pajamas /

We are two plus one
Minus what we’ve done

He steals the sun and turns it into limelight
His pen will give me frostbite

I HATE APPLE / unholy chapel / nowhere to travel / UNRAVEL

Posted on June 10, 2023 by poeeternal

I don’t like Smart Post

Apparently if you have a package shipped with UPS, they won’t actually be delivering it, as they hand it over to the USPS for the “last mile”

More fucking gaslighting

I fucking hate USPS

Now I hate UPS

And it’s not as if I have a choice on who delivers

USPS ruins packages and misplaces them

Not to mention, it adds several more days to your delivery as it gets handed over – to the dreadful USPS for its “last mile”

China can burn in hell

They literally ruined everything

Why did Jesus wear a robe?

Cuz he was ANGRY

But I ain’t allowed to overturn the money tray in church

And now they pass it around more than once

I get agi

So stopped going

I hate everything

But your fucking writing

P.S. I would rather pick up my package from UPS for the “last mile” since they can’t do their fucking job

But that ain’t an option

More hands on my goods cuz China are filthy nosey lil spy cunts

Fuckkkkkkkxufzfylzydzhzkgd

I know I’m not supposed to hate other races but now I despise at least 3

Posted on June 8, 2023 by poeeternal

Do Not Press Enter (says the Devil) poetry

I didn’t press Enter
I pressed Return
So the Devil will linger
Like he has concern

I’m a recovering passive nihilist
I’m always acting childish
Just ask my stylist
Fired for being biased
We’re not an alliance
Fall dead to silence
But I’m full of violence
Underrated and defiant
Won’t find me quiet

In an alternate universe
I didn’t jump soon enough
Guess the train caught my bluff
My friends had already given up

Stick a needle in his eye
Listen to his fake cry
Pooling from his alibi
Set a spell so he may die

The water smells like chlorine
I bet he thinks I’m boring
I guess I’ve lost count scoring
The hate is over pouring

The devil loves my bitterness
Right now I am rigorous
It makes not a difference
Heading for the wilderness

We’re the worst crash
That never happened
Like lightning flash
But we’re still laughing?

The feeling of imminent death
Took the wrong step
Made a wrong left
Death is terrifying
He knows I ain’t lying

Pretty toes
Because the highs are lows
And colored rose
I’ve changed tempos
Searching the afterglow

God loves a good joke

And the Devil being mad

*sigh* despite having video downloads off, found my best viral TikTok video posted by another on YouTube (he did credit me – but where’s my $$$ for it going viral on YT) (fuck you)

Society is a scam.

Poem inspired by a scammer scamming a scammer

Why does it aggravate me so much when people copy me? Because I’m Gen X? And we’re the only generation who are individuals? Yes? No? Maybe?

Please return

Posted on June 8, 2023 by poeeternal

Resets (TikTok gripes 101)

After multiple resets, the TikTok algorithm is finally showing me the content I was watching before the first reset.

~~I will never again~~ complain about my feed

Thank you

P.S. you gotta have 100k followers to turn on tips

*rolls eyes*

I guess rich people are the only ones rewarded in society

Posted on June 6, 2023 by poeeternal

Resetting the TikTok algorithm

I regret resetting my TikTok algorithm

Cuz now I get Asian and other nationalities content – despite having “English” only

AND…

Nothing but TikTok shop

*sigh*

I made it worse

*rolls eyes*

Reset your algorithm if you want to regret it

Posted on June 6, 2023 by poeeternal

Triangulation (bitchmoancomplain)

Amongst the rich, middle class, and poor

Need I say more?

Fell down the rabbit hole

Sharing all I know

I got some poetry incoming!

I’m several days/weeks/months off weed

No getting high

No escaping reality

No dissociating

Breaking out in hives

Got another rent increase incoming

This ain’t home

This is hell

Maybe moving into an RV

Need some land

NEED LAND

Can someone please tell me how to do all caps on an iPhone cuz holding the key down no longer caps lock

I fucking hate AI

And nurses and doctors

I don’t like you

Medical malpractice is COMMON

The Devil runs this ship

I’m gonna get his head and toss it at God’s feet

“I’m home”!

“Sorry it took so long”

This society is literally a web of narcissism

And I’m still trying to remove all the Great Filters man has plugged over everything in an attempt to claim himself as a God

Frauds!

Fuck youuuuuuu

(I also nearly was unable to locate your page again cuz I cleaned some shit and forgot the tricky name)

And the bookmark disappeared

And I’m not allowed to follow/like/curse you out over the things you write that I like

Fuck youuuuuuu

Alice in Wonderland

Completely sober

108 pounds of solid fury

Still feeding squirrel & pretty bird

It pisses off the BLM nihilists out here

6th mass extinction

Fuck you

Some poems incoming just wanted you to know I woke up pinpointing more narcissism in this web we weave

The webs we weave – new poem coming

Also, I’m feeding the house spider cuz I’ve lost my damn mind

Helps

Posted on June 3, 2023 by poeeternal · 8 Comments

Grandiose (poem)

He takes my ideas
And turns them into grandiose amusement thrills
He steals
The yellow daffodils
He’s got too many skills
Landslides and foothills
Rotting thrones
Where he fucking kills

I don’t know what you are. But I definitely know you are the devil.

More poetry incoming if I don’t fucking dieeeee from this battle

108 pounds of solid fucking fury

Good thing I haven’t boycotted my favorite boutique yet and got my nails painted instead

God save me

Posted on June 1, 2023June 1, 2023 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Stay (rant & rhyme)

“Made in China” and should stay there
Like your feelings, I just don’t care

Kayaking all by your lonesome?
Not cuz you’re wholesome?

Those who play by the rules are the mark
I’ve got out my chalk
Refuse to talk
Right hand my glock
Born out of wedlock
Married to my walk

He thinks she should be paroled
Once she is dead

I’ve spent all my life
In captivity

Love will never blossom here again
Tie the knots
And tie the endless twigs
But love –
It won’t blossom here

Sleep in a cloud of prayer
Like running into a server farm
Have no idea if I have come to harm?
Like sleeping on a prayer
With halo in my hair
I’m so dumb I will sound the alarm

So I’m just baggage
Armed with a camera
Can do some damage
It’s an advantage

Centenarian
Want to live to then

He said it’s safer
In the lion’s den
Like hate is my neighbor
But he ain’t friend

Father,
There’s almost nothing left
My sister is dead
I’m bereft
Sick in the head
Near out of breath
Got money in the bulkhead

Compartments upon compartments
Secret dirty pockets

He’s a no outlet
I’m driving full speed
Like he’s a preacher for me to confess
But he’s a no outlet

Am I walking to the gate of resentment
Where there’s no contentment
I am so relentless
It’s a consensus

Below: rant and rhyme

Weighed in at 108 pounds today despite eating $100 dollars worth of Cracker Barrel over the last 3 days.

My new small clothing is already too big, and the extra small are loose. Extra extra small exists but I’m probably too fat for it.

108 pounds because “my labs are fine” despite cancer eating me alive

Medical malpractice is common

I don’t want anywhere near a hospital when dying

And like Bob, I would call 9/11 and hang up.

I recently did that, after giving my 201? (location) and she had the audacity to ask me the location.

I responded, “I just fucking told you” and click.

Call disconnected

I did not answer the return

And spoke with the cop when he arrived who informed me that “all of Daytona is bad. Move.”

My lease is up in April

I really don’t want to renew

I also don’t know where to move?

I need land (1-5 acres and a down payment of like a lot)

Can you start dropping coordinates

Of potential places

Where there aren’t many faces

I’m stuck in stasis

Skipping over bases

We’re tied just like laces

Let the sign read faceless

Erasing traces

Following the void

God is gracious

But my neighbors are so racist

I ain’t complacent

Need new spaces

(Help pretty please)

I hope TikTok gets banned

I made my account private and uninstalled the communistic spy app cuz I’m in trouble again for sharing LGBT fashion and stating I was boycotting it

My hate extends all the way to “Made in China”

Stamp it

Engrave it

I fucking hate it

The Great Wall of deceit

WordPress too

The phone is dead come September

Don’t want a new

Not dropping $500+ every two years to be punished on social media

Literally ready to just disappear

By Uncle Sam

My parents are still alive but I don’t know their phone or address

Like a kid, I feel helpless

Acting out of will

Guess I’m growing feckless

Avoiding road of reckless

And feeling so desperate

Just need a quiet place to rest

Maybe God’s chest?

I love him the best

God 1st

Fuck AI

Stop training the AI

I will fuck him up

The Chinese will use AI to commit crime as they are attempting to avoid karma

I do not comply

With any change happening

You fucking asshole

You voted for Biden eh

And have the audacity to say “I can’t trust you”

Oh do-do

I can’t be in the same room as a man

Hardly any women

99.9% of the population denounced God

Stop gaslighting you soulless pricks

“I’m not having children”

Yeah cuz you are bad witch

Nihilist

You all went grey in your 30s

Cuz you removed yer sex organs

For plastic

To look like you’re about to have a baby

But you can’t

And are not

And I’m still bleeding

My life was stolen from me

God feels pain

The dog is driving me insane

I know who is to blame

There’s only one name on my blacklist

*insert shit that could hurt me in the future*

So which path do I take?

Revenge or forgiveness?

It ain’t none of your business

Sincerely as your witness

Kisses sealed with suspicious

Pepper sprayed cuz I’m vicious

What if all these freckles on my body are shadow burns from other stars we can’t actually see cuz our own Sun

Like how the shadow of people were burned into the wall when they were nuked

Like an xray

A mirror reflecting the cosmos

If we could really leave earth, we would

Man killed the dinosaurs

6th mass extinction

You’re gonna burn in hell

For all eternity

Reincarnation is another word for cloning

*sigh* I spend so much time fixing the algorithm

And don’t get paid for it

I no longer answer surveys or give my opinions

Unless you gonna $$$$ me

I’m not racist, I just don’t like you

Be someone worth liking

You’re a walking HollyWood soundbar

Propaganda is all you spew

Cox and his cocks, I mean clocks

Science is nihilism

I wish the dog was dead

I want my life back

Sorry not sorry

People changed him

I’m a passive nihilist in recovery

God save me

But the darkened ones in Generica

The majority

I don’t want to save

Would step back from my own family in flames

Have done and did

Regrets? Oh yeee

Going dark for 6 months or so

There are demons running this world

Satan’s domain

I’ve overstayed my welcome

Losing faith but seldom

Sharpening it like weapon

Cuz devil is depression

As above so below

You ever worry about just being ones and zeros

Like Pinocchio hoping for a soul

Like jumping in a hole

I ran out of stories of cave dying

And have moved onto “crocodile’s eating humans”

I’ve done some seriously dangerous shit as a teen

Nothing like jumping off a ship into shark infested waters at night

This one guy wanted to visit the nudest colony in Death Valley

By miracle he was rescued

But opted a second time to go again

HE DIED

There is a pattern with the seconds

Like how I got the second shot

I’m at risk for Adult Sudden Death syndrome

My immune system was compromised

I’m alive by sheer will and the grace of God

If I knew I only had X amount of time remaining

I’d probably exact my revenge

It’s extremely hard walking a path of holy

In the devil’s land

What dimension are we in again?

It’s a proven fact that Gen Y and Z are dumber than previous generations

I can’t relate to anyone but Gen X and him and him

Him and Him – new book name

I identify as a GIRL

Men cannot have babies

Everybody is a fucking pedo

Fuck LGBT

Fuck TikTok

Fuck “Made in China”

The cops: indecent exposure

Me: the clothes make me burn

Cotton or au gratin?

Apparently most cheese isn’t cheese

Why does God spare some and not others?

Potential?

Not an NPG?

Anything that can happen does and will

Possibility?

Both wave and particle

Timeline jumping

I was going at least 80 miles an hour when I moved into the middle-lane at the exact moment thousands of hands of lightning struck my Jeep, all 4 windows down, arm out

“Fuck” I cried as I whipped my arm in and looked through my rearview and side mirrors taking my foot off the pedal

The sound deafening

Lightning touched my arm

The whole Jeep was surrounded by arms of lightning

God is behind every miracle

Deny him three times no never

My love you can never sever

God gave me the cosmos

Man gave me counseling