I lived, I died, and I didn’t concur a thing
Even love evaded me
When angels fall, they don’t have a wing
But I fell, so I could hear him sing
I broke, for he is a king
© Delia Ross. 2019
Shadows
I don’t have alot to sustain me
I guess that it probably shows
I always prefer the shadows
This is the cons and pros
You can find me under a tree
Writing a bit of prose
I am a living zombie
Trying not to decompose
I live near the sea
I love how the wind blows
I listen gently
And think of him I suppose
© Delia Ross. 2019
Words
Words got my tongue
Down deep they run
Rushing into sun
That’s where you’re from
© Delia Ross. 2019
Sundown
I love you best in waning light
When all conditions are so right
While conversation eats the night
How darkness takes away the blight
You whisper in my ear instead of fight
I love you best in silhouette
When real life hasn’t struck us yet
The resting world is on reset
But darling, this is our Corvette
You know the best to come is here to get
I love you best before sunrise
When all the world’s before your eyes
Where dreams are ours to analyze
There’s never pain, and never lies
It’s where the fever rest and darkness dies
© Delia Ross. 2019
Consequences
People grow, people change
You can stall or rearrange
But the journeys all the same
And mostly people are to blame
We can fight or we can pray
Or we can find another way
But the dark will come to play
Death will come to all one day
Was it worth all these fears
That you brought all these years
We’re living ghosts with too many tears
It’s like I’m speaking on deaf ears
© Delia Ross. 2019
Alien
What message are they trying to send?
Is it even a lesson I can comprehend?
Why do I always feel so alien?
I know you’re speaking English but I don’t understand
Arms are flaring, lips uncaring, that’s not even my name!
Now I’m under threat, and this is not a fucking game!
You’re yelling, acting crazy, saying that I’m insane
Battles come at you and it’s important for knowing
I know I’m marching right but the exits where I’m going!
Pick your battles wisely or they’ll constantly be flowing
© Delia Ross. 2019
Reflections
I saw you in the reflection of my smile; decided to linger around awhile
It’s not the same as living in denial; not by a long-mile
© Delia Ross. 2019
40 Years
40 years been packing and on the explore
Can hear his cries bounce off the distant shore
Stranded in deserts and pulling on my core
I would go there, if only for the lore
But I would search for forty more
If it meant I’d find his door
© Delia Ross. 2019
Net It
I would give you all and not even sweat it
Every single word and not even regret it
I would lose it all so you can net it
There’s space for healing if you let it
© Delia Ross. 2019
Nine Lives
I’ve lived so many decades
I’ve lived a hundred lives
I’ve let down so many faces
I’ve met a thousand knives
I’ve ran around in places
Where nothing else survives
The weight of my own cases
Carry all of my nine lives
© Delia Ross. 2019
Distance
I don’t understand how it is we’ve got so far
The distance so demanding I can’t get there by car
Spiraled out to feed you and you turned into a star
Everything erupted now I’m feeling so bizarre
© Delia Ross. 2019
Fort Worth
I will follow you like budding winds wherever they may blow
We can get there quickly or else we can take it slow
I know we both are driving, but to what direction though?
Time we’re always biding and how much no one can know
Some never realizing we don’t choose the highs and lows
Death can waltz right by, and what shall be our final pose?
I can feel my body dying or perhaps I’m paranoid
Been functioning in life like I’m a rusted, broken droid
T.V. on at night, and they proclaim an asteroid
I want to follow you maybe until the end of Earth
Sunlight from your body puts my soul through a rebirth
But, still, to me you’re worth more than the gold that they secure within Fort Worth
© Delia Ross. 2019
You are fabulous! Thank you for visiting my blog and reading my words! Thanks for your likes, comments or shares! Thank you for returning to read more! Thank you for following me if you are! I am grateful for each and every one of you no matter where you are in the world! It means so much to me that you take the time to read my poetry.
Here is a quick thank you video because I wanted to be able to tell you verbally how much it means! You also get a chance to meet me very briefly. Direct link to my thank you video is here: https://youtu.be/IcNLKgwjL_U
12,000 visits!!! I LOVE YOU!!! MORE WORDS COMING!!
p.s. I’m aware this should have probably been completed at 10k but I am always late to the party! =)
My Favorite Lie
It’s what I tell myself to get by, my favorite lie
And one I never use but on myself
If said with a sigh, it’s likely I’ll cry
So I smile and draw a cross upon my chest
There may be a time, I hid more in rhyme
But now there’s really only one left
If put in a book, I know you would look
So I hid the only one on my shelf
© Delia Ross. 2019
Trying to Forget
You’re coming to town, I heard in the news
You mention her name, it gives me troubling blues
I’ve been that girl, and I’ve fell in her shoes
I forget why I care or how I still hate you
They don’t think I’ve moved on and it’s probably true
But I don’t want you back, I’m the one who left
And the only one who apparently felt
It makes no difference now how many women you get
I was number one and your best asset
I spend all of my time just trying to forget
© Delia Ross. 2019
Lesson Number One
The first lesson in life there’s not a soul you can depend
You’re standing on a slope and you think you have some friends
You see an edge of hope and you try to rope it in
You have a moment, feast on it, and hope it never ends
You build it up, then break it down, and wish it works as it intends
Laughing all the way while you write your long amends
This will be enough, you hope, to finally settle all the winds
Soon you’ll find it shocking there’s even less who attends
Apparently you’re not the only one who pretends
You shouldn’t ignore lessons that the uni recommends
I gave it to you straight but you took a thousand bends
Now you have a list of a lot of ex-girlfriends
© Delia Ross. 2019
Nothings Impossible
No I don’t dream, I beam with possibility
As fragile of a thing it may seem
There are things better than a king
A princess no, heaven maybe
Of things that I see and feel
Even you can make me kneel
These things count to zero
When I see you as a hero
Underneath your mask and cape
A gentle heart and one that aches
There is a girl who can fix the scrape
She may even cause you a few earthquakes
© Delia Ross. 2019
Revive
You take as if I never meant to give
You retreat when nows the time to really live
You forget when all I ask is you forgive
You shine a light when the coast it isn’t clear
I regret but I’ll change another year
You can fret but I’m still around to cheer
I did laugh but instead you saw a tear
We could try but you took a different road
Our lives tied to the lies that we sold
I could love but I’m really not that bold
Their touch it has always been so cold
It was never a dwelling where I could survive
I live in a shell but I’m barely alive
My feet are planted and ready to thrive
I may be depressed but I’ll likely revive
© Delia Ross. 2019
Could Have, Would Have, Should Have
I could have been a lawyer
But I studied instead to mope
I could have loved you better
Now instead I hate you most
I would have wrote a letter
But this poem instead should work
I would have ripped your heart out
And put it on a perch
I should have sought out shelter
When it started to get worse
You should have loved me better
But now instead I’m broke
© Delia Ross. 2019
Last Call
I hid my heart so it wouldn’t get stolen
I got an injury and now it is swollen
Can feel it throbbing though it never was open
I stored it away so it wouldn’t get broken
It’s never been loved and I’m not even joking
Now it’s getting late and the window is closing
© Delia Ross. 2019
If
If you never leap
Our hearts will never be fulfilled
I will slowly be climbing
This hill until I’m killed
If you never wake
I will always stay asleep
Trapped in a nightmare
With only fear that I can reap
If you never jump
My heart will always be on stall
Waiting on a spark
Where no one ever heeds the call
If you don’t believe
I will never love at all
You may take in hope
But it’s likely that I’ll fall
© Delia Ross. 2019
Things
I don’t need a fancy dress, I don’t need a king
I don’t want a gold headdress, or a diamond ring
I won’t ever make you guess, just keep me near your wing
A kiss or two though I confess, would make me feel something
© Delia Ross. 2019
Pieces
Here, here are all the pieces
I’ve donated them to you
For you to assemble and mend
I’ve signed all official forms & releases
Your package will soon be in view
It’s stamped and addressed to you my friend
Hopefully you can teach me what peace is
My heart is now yours to attend to
Please make all this loneliness end
© Delia Ross. 2019
Viral Outbreak
I’ll never be anything to anyone you see
I’m not even certain I’m anything to me
I can’t sell you on something I do not believe
God didn’t equip me with eyes that can see
But he gave me the ability to feel
I feel it all without being able to heal
This was never ever part of the deal
It’s like daily I’m having to bow down and kneel
But not for you and not for him
A vast ocean without the knowledge to swim
A country on decline and it’s all looking grim
I’m tired of aching with a broken limb
Everything I do is a potential mistake
Every move I take another reason to ache
Any chance I give you just another heartbreak
Love it needs a vessel like a viral outbreak
© Delia Ross. 2019
Sad Empty Pathetic Lives
One from my private vault, and from two years ago (April 2017). Completely raw and untouched for April Poetry Month.
sad empty pathetic lives… what reruns they are
he’ll never have my love or respect again. he’ll never have my forgiveness and he’s never going to be worthy of my friendship.
but now, to get up and move again… i need to mend.
sometime in the years end
i need to mend
sometime in the years end
i’ll need a friend
you said you would never hurt me again
a weight off my shoulders
yet seven feet in…
sometime in the years end
i need to mend
sometime in the years end
i’ll cry again
behind those large blue eyes
a monster lurks
never a day that ends-
always at work
he said he would never hurt me again
he said he would never
i hate you
and no amount of time
will ever change that
you know what you are,
you know what you did
how would you think
i’d not wish you dead
how did you think
i’d not wish you dead
i need silence inside my head
but there’s violence inside your bed
how did you think i’d not wish you dead
sad empty pathetic lives… what monsters they are
lurking and lusting and
draining souls
i will never relinquish control
i was head deep in
before i could swim
i’m learning how to live again
i’m learning how to live
oh for a brief moment you made me believe
in a fairytale
(but you’re really a monster from hell, tell tell)
oh ye sloth
you were treated like a king
even out of cloth
and lying on your knee
one or two or a thousand
how many hearts now bleed?
i didn’t want to be her, i plead
but you’re still not listening
you have no heart, you see
oh, and good luck on the baby
what hurts most of all, i believed you
and the thing that hurts most is, you knew all along
you knew
this is cruel deception
you are evil incarnate
the dead, risen again
he has no soul
(might as well call me a widow, i’m mourning my soul
the death of my heart)
nocturnal mourning
every morning
i should have seen
all the warnings
hating you is the only way to get through, it’s the only way i will survive. but is it wrong to hate a monster?
© Delia Ross. 2019
Lies
It doesn’t stop the ache
At night when I’m awake
Or morning’s when I’m broken
And words are barely spoken
My eyes will say I’m fine
Even if I’m on decline
You’ll never see me crying
But now you know I’m lying
© Delia Ross. 2019
Depression is Real
Recently I was asked if I would do a short VIDEO on depression awareness and you can watch it on the JoyforJan Instagram direct by the link below:
https://www.instagram.com/joyforjan/p/BwuvjQagf-Y/?utm_source=ig_share_sheet&igshid=18yzgj2zdg08y
Ingredients for Ruin
Pulled straight out from the mire
One sweet heart now gone sour
Leave it to cower for an hour
Diminish the balance of power
Make it feel your fire
Left unattended it should expire
© Delia Ross. 2019
Lines
I never know when it is that I’ll cross a line
Between each state, my next mistake, or maybe when I rhyme
It’s guaranteed, I will succeed, it shouldn’t take much time
I’ve been practicing since I was young like I’m meeting a deadline
Some would even say that I was born without a spine
It’s difficult to receive help even if I hold a sign
If given any choice they’d likely toss me with the swine
Do they know it’s not the mud from which I begrime
© Delia Ross. 2019
Transfer Request Pending
I’ve never had anyone look at me the way they look at her
Although I am fully grown I must be an amateur
I wonder when they look at me I appear to be a blur
Similar to a black hole, is there nothing to observe?
Many times I have been told I’m just not what they prefer
But why do they always get to decide what is that I deserve?
I applied to move to Mars, I hope they put in my transfer…
© Delia Ross. 2019
Emotional Cargo
I wish I didn’t know what it is that I know
I’d stop myself from going down a path I never grow
Then I’d never sneer when I see an old photo
I’d never ever wonder who I’d be without the woe
I wish I didn’t know what it is that I know
I’d stop myself from packing all of this emotional cargo
I seem to carry it with me no matter where it is I go
I’d gladly give it to you but there’s no place left to stow
© Delia Ross. 2019
HEADCASE
Mostly clear with periodic downfalls
You can reach out but I’m ignoring most calls
If you drop by might find me clawing the halls
I’d communicate but my voice it just stalls
I don’t want to go out or browsing the malls
Just say goodbye, it’s better to avoid any pitfalls
© Delia Ross. 2019
Rejection
Tired of dudes hitting on me and then rejecting me
Most of them probably need a vasectomy
They shouldn’t make children no matter the necessity
I’m over you and that’s a guarantee
© Delia Ross. 2019
Tomb
She laid down her head on top of his tomb
It’ll quickly be over, it’ll be over soon
She’d been planning for days, it’ll happen by noon
Finally time for a nap, resting below is her groom
© Delia Ross. 2019
RSVP Declined
Why send an invitation if it’ll just be declined
I want to be seen but I stand with the blind
Every rejection makes me more aligned
I still look confused though I’ve made up my mind
You warned you were bad but you are the worst kind
Oh teacher, oh teacher why’d you leave me blue
Another desertion what more can I do
We barely had started but now we are through
I may have been late but I can’t outrun you
Give me the full movie not just the preview
© Delia Ross. 2019
HEARTLESS
Your words are so sharp, they cut like a blade
These sorrows march at me and come in brigades
You move through life like a game of charades
I guess you discovered I have nothing to raid
© Delia Ross. 2019 / @PoeEternal
DEPRESSED 101
My depression is working overtime and charging me extra. Can’t bribe him with a day off no matter the weather. Told him to get moving but he dropped the anchor. This lake is filled with tears and I ain’t getting better. I put it in a memorandum and even wrote it in a letter. He just laughed at me, shouted, and gave the middle finger. The only way I can quiet him is with some liquor. He follows me every year but here’s the kicker.
He mirrors me and worries me and is in every picture. The funny thing, the longer he dreams, the less I remember.
© Delia Ross. 2019
Love Story
It’s a love story from the dead to the dead
Rotating cyclones of he said, she said
It isn’t what I meant here’s what I mean instead
Constantly sending each other gifts of dread
You wanted to be heard, now your face is turning red
But I’m sorry, you’re sorry, it’s all we ever had
Now we’re feeling worse, we are always feeling bad
Our circles quickly dropping unless we stopped trying to add
Try to greet you all and you respond like you are mad
I’m certain all I wanted was for us feeling a tad less sad
Actions and words never meeting in the middle
And every single wound leaves us all so very brittle
Consequences come at you hard to read like a riddle
But everyone thinks they know how to love just a little
You swear it isn’t you but here it comes another missile
I know we’re all in hell it doesn’t take a degree
You’re always on the run, you barely ever take a knee
I know I’m paranoid the devil’s always after me
Blinding us with hate or lust I can’t convince you all to see
I’m just curious if any of you really do feel free
You build these walls and cages but who do they protect
You haven’t convinced me that your life is so perfect
I wonder if any of you clearly understand yet
It’s doubtful though so I’m passing on this bet
I’ll try again and maybe this time I will be more direct
Okay another verse, perhaps a message you can understand
None of this can work if we don’t give a helping hand
I live here, you live there, we all share this land
Love is not something to hoard, set it free unmanned
Love it knows the way so let it lead our command
© Delia Ross. 2019
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house of sadness
dreary of loitering in the house of ache
found abandoned & rotted next to a bloody lake
stopped by to visit when i needed me a break
thought i could stomach being wounded by another snake
broken statues forgotten in my honors sake
you’re terribly rotten for pinching me awake
i was resting soundly til you pierced me with a stake
now fully aware my existence is a mistake
every move wrong no matter which i take
10 reasons to hate you and on that hand i can shake
so if you’d like to visit, a new road you’ll need to make
i’m just a ghost at least you know i never was a fake
© Delia Ross. 2019
BROKEN TICKER
I do not want it back
This broken heart of mine
It’s been broken now
For the longest time
Tried to fix it
But it has a tick
Under me where it dwells
The tick so loud
Sometimes I want
To kick it straight to hell
Even froze the thing-
Can’t feel anything
But it knows my address well
It’s a subtle ding
Yet I hear it ping
And it makes me want to yell
Tried to send it home
Won’t leave me alone
As far as I can tell
Put a sign outside
With the words FREELOVE wide
Not one fell for the sale!
Watched everyone walk by
Not a tear in their eye
But they all wish me well
© Delia Ross. 2019
Why won’t this heart leave me alone?
Love Is
Love is-
Leading them to an empty well
Deserting us someplace in hell
Love is-
Building them up before they fall
You never loved any ever at all
Love is-
Demanding devotion eternal to you
Lying no matter what you have to do
Love is-
Tainting everything you touch
I really never loved you much
© Delia Ross. 2019
Permanent Winter
She owed them a pretty picture
Her soul was pretty injured
She sold it but never got richer
She kept it hid under a fancy fixture
The ones who buy it always get triggered
Pointing at you with their middle finger
Too far away you can’t hear them whisper
The season there is a permanent winter
With a sign that reads “winner winner”
You’ve been fed that lie since you were a beginner
© Delia Ross. 2019
Cross Your Mind
Crossed our wires, wrong hands for hire
and now they’re blaming me
Shooting blanks and loading tanks
with riots in the street
I’d rather bid my precious hours
where two lovers greet
And if it seems it’s worth my time,
perhaps I’ll move my feet
Into the light, we sail tonight
I brought for us a treat
You’re feeling sour, my mood can tower
it’s best that we shall meet
I promise skies, and never lies
we can be discrete
You can’t deny, I’m on your mind
I think that’s pretty neat
© Delia Ross. 2019
Just a Number
Congrats, you make me feel just like a number
Can’t hear my voice for the crowd and thunder
It’s time I put my soul to slumber
Touching me must have been a blunder
Would you even notice if I fell under
My dreams of you are full of wonder
My heart it aches being just a number
© Delia Ross. 2019
Never Thought
She never thought she could again feel
Her heart was paralyzed with fear
His words weighed heavy & cut through steel
Wounds so deep one had to kneel
It never seemed the wounds would heal
The lessons never appeared clear
Just gashing pain brought from his spear
The crowd behind him full of cheer
Lashing out at you every year
She must hate him a great deal
© Delia Ross. 2019
Sheepskin
Falling, falling, falling again
Into another vortex I spin
Down, down, down I’ve been
So far below there’s no light within
The pressure it builds & rattles my skin
It’s like a daily battle I’m in
The system is built for it to win
Remember the enemy is in sheepskin
© Delia Ross. 2019
Hard To Assemble
He’s hard to assemble with instructions vague
You should avoid him like he is the plague
Jekyll at night and Hyde by day
The bull is always out to play
He wrote the script, ignored the signs
Made me want to commit some crimes
I hate he’s even still alive
Erase him from my archive
© Delia Ross. 2019
Love & Whiskey
I grew up on Tennessee whiskey
Tequila Sunrise, Bloody Mary, Long Island Iced Tea, daiquiris
I’ll have love on the rocks please
© Delia Ross. 2019
Unearth
You don’t think you are what you’re worth
You get with these girls who treat you like dirt
Riding down the wrong lane since your birth
Building walls to avoid being hurt
We’ve both flown all over the Earth
Our souls dryer than the hottest desert
I bet we have some love to unearth
© Delia Ross. 2019
The Darkness
The hardest thing in life for me to accept is death
It fills me with dread and quite often regret
Chasing memories one day I’ll forget
I’m racing towards death like we’re in a duet
My mind constantly putting me under threat
All the suicides I’ve yet to accept
Since I was a teen I have been depressed
Losing her was my biggest debt
My soul will never heal I bet
It’s fine, I’ll light another cigarette
And simmer down after sunset
Love might be my largest asset
© Delia Ross. 2019
PoeEternal 