If you want to take the island
Burn the boats
I’m near the horizon
And taking notes
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Inspired by this speech
Category: poetry
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Pop up artist in Oklahoma
Has no damn diploma
Divorced him in a coma
But darling she’s a cold one
Unreal omens
Roaming like the Romans
My blood is spoken
One spell never broken
Couldn’t love them both then?
We’re nearly dressed alike
Turn down the turnpike
Let’s go for a hike
Heard from hope tonight
Maybe it was harder than I thought it would be
Humility
He likes my tiny –
My tiny tiny heart
Nicknamed sunshiny
His counterpart
The big girls keep yelling that I’m small / I fear he can’t see me at all
Like a volcano about to erupt
I’m running amuck
Let me be abrupt
This government is corrupt!
Everything he writes
Is about him me you us
Combined in a trust
Locked without fuss
To put her mind at ease, he lied
With spear in side
Not Judascide
Cat caught the mouse
Lie tied to mouth
Not big the trap
Are you burning down cities?
Running from the guilty?
Like a modern viking gypsy?
Do you fancy life more risky?
Got a shot a whiskey?
AWOL / never ordered you to leave
I’m 1600 miles away from hope
No room for boat
Get your telescope
Walking a tightrope
Has karma grabbed your foot?
Think you’re off the hook?
Think steps I mistook?
Ban me like a crook?
I’m a fucking primate
Gotta lot on my plate
You make life misery
You take all liberty
I clean but make a bigger mess / to God I confess
It’s like he’s observing a galaxy from 4 billion years ago –
The girl he used to know
Does he see how much I’ve grown?
Adventure is more reliable than happiness
Said once a therapist?
You’re a deceitful mess
I learned from the best
Dear Necromancer,
Nothing is not the answer
Let God be the anchor
And Earth, don’t forget to thank her
The nervous thumb twitch
Like broke then too rich
Got called a dumb bitch
Might wind up in a ditch
Your new life will cost you your old one
Just waiting for the dog to be done
There’s something super familiar about all these incidents
Just can’t place my feather on it
He works in 12 hour shifts
Might hear from him
In a dozen years
Could you mumble in monotone some more / you’re a zombie chewing on my bored
I wonder where you are on my follower list
Someone I’ll surely miss?
Connection with a twist?
Or maybe you don’t exist?
Got knocked down
Lost my place
Scattered humility
Eclipsed across my face
Nearly lost my soul
Now taking second place
He doesn’t understand
I don’t have love for him
I don’t have love for much
I don’t have love for them
He comes on like rain
Smell of petrichor
Bet I love it more
I know you think I’m boring
Map me like you’re exploring
Tell you stories that got you snoring
I know who you’re ignoring
He’s so bizarre
Drive fast in my car
Foot on the throttle
He thinks I’m odd
We are distributed across billions of light years of space
That’s the love it takes
That’s why our heart aches
Unlimited weight
We’re at infinities gate
Heaven will not waitCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Got my asshole tore up on TikTok today. A few violations.
FYI: you ain’t that good at thinking (poem coming soon) (maybe)
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The alarms are calming
Saw someone was coming
The fourth numbing
My faith is humming
Battle axe now summingCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
I was trained to not run out into danger, “play dead” when overtook
“Don’t become a casualty yourself”
“Don’t play hero”
“Make sure the scene is safe”
“Triage”
“Ration”
“Defense”
“One shot, one kill”
Targets chest and head
= dead dead
Never failed at range
Range was at least twice a year – not just Basic Training
“Trained killer”
The Army imprinted on me
You never lost my stripes
Just my sense of direction and uniforms
Which I can replace with ones that fit
I can wear my uniforms anytime anywhere
And you will address me as my title if I am in such role
Deal with it
VETS MATTER
But go on and keep pissing in the Veterans memorial and getting Walmart closed down
The alarms bring a sense of calm
I’ll use it to my advantage instead of having a ptsd meltdown
I’m looking entirely natural and cute while going out – most people are treating me nicer – I’m seeing loads more BLM who want to unalive me – including the children who wanna pop us (and 3 teenagers were just charged with killing a white person)
I’m not ready to die, I’m fighting for my life
This fucking cancer is eating me alive
Go on and make fun of my body again – even though I work out – I don’t live in the gym – but I don’t sleep all day (or at all?)
Going weapons shopping soon 🙂
Gotta lay low for now
My rent is cheap as fuck – I don’t call this home – it’s hell and cheap for a reason – but I can’t flee yet – or would let them have this place – which is being gentrified – the cop Sunday said this whole town is bad.
Just going for gas or food is a gamble
Just checking my mail
They want us living in fear
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Nitrogen narcosis
Dead roses
Lost hope like Moses
Wandering desert hopeless
Some nights we’re frozen
Like unfocused locust
We’re losing focus
Gave God diagnosis
Humanity atrocious
I guess this is us?
The depths that we cross?
Tell God all is lost?Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Maybe you can access my domain and maybe you can’t.
Listen, I am the Great Anomaly. But maybe not the only.
244.
I’ve reached out to the Happiness engineers – but I’m never really happy (it’s likely also their fault why I never set up the contact page and things because I get stuck on a step and all hell breaks loose)
I’m drinking ginger currently – it’s spicy
All my clothing from Dolls Kill is fitting – and I’m feeling super cute in said clothes –
My OF ID is poeeternal77 I believe
I deleted my TikTok again – maybe for a day, maybe an hour, maybe a month
Gotta keep em guessing
I don’t pay attention to the hits incoming
I just hit delete notification and uninstall
I hope TikTok gets banned
And Instagram
And PayPal sold your identity out TWICE and then had the audacity to list you as my first contact
We’ve never communicated there
It was an anonymous thang
And like X amount of years later – first contact
I almost paid you back
But I deleted my account instead because I’m fucking psycho
And got tired of the outting and the spam emails
And then the cashapp was mutiliated – not long before Bob was
I don’t know how to spell the word and there is no other suggestion
MUTILATED mutilated
Oh well now I got it
Whatever
Fuck it
“Honey, I’m trying to spell something I know I can spell but can’t”
My mother once said watching TV with the subtitles on “is annoying” (which I need) (it’s not about the volume either)
So I no longer own a TV
My therapist says I’m polarized but the two weren’t related
Just an observation – she’s a cunt
(The Boomer mom)
My last words to her were a text message on Valentine’s circa 2017 (maybe) stating I hope she has a painful death and whatever it is couldn’t be near the pain and suffering she has caused me
And I blocked her and never looked back
Then last year my sister died
And I didn’t go say byeeee to her in the hospital
The Boomer mom will be rolling in her grave – if she ever dies
I wonder often these days should I contact the blood folks
My real father wants to know “if I’m happy”
His sister got her head bit off for reaching out to me
I ghosted my father when I was ten
People say you can’t hate your parents – so then I researched and realized that you could – not only hate your parents – but an entire generation
The Boomers
Who hold most of House
Once people die, there’s literally zero reason to hold onto a grudge
I can’t fix my dead sister and she was a psychopath so death was the only relief
“I think I might drop Cain / like Cain dropped Abel”
Because he was a fucking psychopath
She needed an exorcism and even that might not have saved her
It’s not my job to save you
You gotta save yourself down here
Stop being an asshole
I was gonna drop more poetry but I don’t have anything to type from
The phone can’t even type the letters I press
I got a hacker from India inside my phone
My modem was destroyed
I’m not hitting backspace for letters to disappear
I hate autofill – it pops up but changes to a different word
I spend more time correcting than I do writing
I don’t care if I misspell anymore!
It’s the algo, not me!
More poetry coming soon
P.S. these immigrants don’t care about you. They have invaded our borders and way of life. Stay protected! Your life matters! They are attacking females especially and doing so unprovoked! It’s seems to nearly always be a black person attacking. Black lives matter. White lives don’t. Check the CENSUS, it’s not how they are reporting. And not gossip sites but research shows many Chinese Americans and Mexican’s identify as “the new white”.
CONCERNING
Just gonna erase history huh
Wipe us out, take over
The Great Race war is real
I’m brown and white and not dissing my own race to put up another race – slavery started in Africa and is still going on in Africa and not one white person owns a slave – but black people do
White slavery exists and started with a black person owning a white woman and they condition and break us all!!! They hate us!!!!!
I do not hate white people and I’m tired of the slander against us
No one in my bloodline ever owned a slave
Take money from me for it and there will be consequence
Byeee
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From riches to rags
From rags to riches
It must be such a drag
Doing nothing that he wishesAnd I’m raising the red flags
Pulling monsters from the ditches
Reminding God of broken airbags
The Great Anomaly comes with glitchesCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I found the pot at the end of the rainbow
But I’m still dying
More cute clothes arriving
And organic cotton joggers n tees cuz t3 sarah mode
Gotta be comfys and calm and collect
Revenge is served coldly with a smile
I was double cursed
But Edgar (my daddy) already died naked on the street (been there, done that)
I know why Cleo died
I’ve traveled far through time
I’m not sinking with the Titanic again
I fear those waters for a reason
I know things to happen before they do
Major events
Little events
Been questioning authority from in womb / day 1
Depressed?
You’re not living how
IGod intendedThe Great Judgment has arrived
Get right with
meGodI want so many bird houses on my property that I forget where they are
Bring the pressure washer when you visit
I’m sure everything will need a clean
Bring pieeeeee (not poisoned)
(Anything bought is poison)
(Even the expensive vegan things)
(Bring all the ingredients for me to make a pie instead)
“I wanted to bring you a pie but they were all poisoned”
I know you’ve never had a real biscuit before
My memaw taught me to make them
Said, “the only way to a man’s heart is through his belly”
Or was it stomach?
You tiss it when u big enuff cuz you ain’t big enuff yet
She had 5 acres with a 3 bedroom trailer
I ain’t asking for much
She had 12 kids with her husband
I ain’t been married yet
The Boomers stole everything from me
And now BLM have the audacity to ask me why I move where there are black people?
Bitch for real?
I will fucking hang you on a tree
Without remorse
*stay humbled*
I’m only a messenger
ANGEL
When you want to feed pretty bird but also skin a head…
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Jim Morrison was capable of creating riots
I’m terrible changing diets
But I’m feeling twice as violent!!!Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
How many woke Boomers were murdered or went into hiding!?!
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You have dreams from my nightmare
Plant a flower that is rare
Tell me how you don’t care
I’ll be there
With flower in my hair
Dancing but nowhere
Erase me like your software
Drop down now in prayerCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Things you should know about me: I’ll never ask for a Senior discount.
Never ask a lady her age
It’s your job to make me feel as young and youthful as I feel
Dying and still clutching the “Goddess of Youth” title
My nightmares become your dreams
Plant or pluck
Pluck maybe seems implied if it’s now in my hair – and what exactly don’t you care about nihilist?
But, we don’t know who plucked the rare flower now do we?
We can only assume
And you hate assumptions?
Found something the Devil doesn’t like.
Assuming
My favorite game to play
Oh goodie
It’s a full moon
I must manifest purification and a husband
Some guys don’t mind the miles especially when they see you make effort to keep it mint
And apparently, I may be worth more now than before…
Because the actual Jeep place wants to buy my ride. “Worth more now” – eh maybe
She kinda imprinted on me
I worked hard to get her paid off
Need a mechanic I can trust
Wanna see how many miles I can get – but they go quick
It’s not a good time to buy a house or car
BUT
I am looking for land
Maybe a sleep barn
Gonna hide cash like a squirrel
Let’s play Easter egg hunt 2.0
Who can find the treasure chest?
I can’t even find another apartment to vacate to
I’m not paying for cable
Plus everything else
But please, don’t call the cops on me when I wind up in misery
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George,
Maybe if we met in different timelines
In many lifetimes
While singing these hymns
You won’t leave my mind
Give thanks like windchimesCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
The messy middle (growing pains) Don’t let these demons gaslight you into believing God isn’t real
The ether told me you live two times. The first when you’re born, and the second when you discover your purpose.
Sometimes we have really intense connections with people we will never see again.
People we wish we could know on a different level.
A mutual energy exchange.
God works in mysterious ways.
I hope he finds me a husband like *insert so-in-so*
I hope for a husband instead of a grave
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Dearly belated
Oh Most Hated
Got me jaded
Nearly persuaded
But sun hasn’t faded
He’s the Epic of Gilgamesh
Death is irrelevant
Lessons from a demigod –
Speaks a bunch of gibberish!
Dear Elite
Think life’s complete
With hand I’ll greet
Meet me in the street?
Do you think God plays favorites?
Paradise for the angel?
Won’t give me nothing I can’t handle?
Cold water sinks / depression leaks
Nothing is more expensive than a cheap boat
Unless you’re out of hope
Better pray for rope
Here’s your footnote
Now you’re just somebody that I want to know
I promise –
I won’t make any promises
I’m too damn ominous
Like doubting Thomas
But my tongue is honest
I’m investing in bullets and freshwater
Dream of killing father
Knelt down by altar
Gold coins for slaughter
At knee they foster
Silver and laughter
It’s land I’m after
For ash to scatter
And sin for answer
God is still my master
Hereafter
I don’t know my own father’s face / I don’t know his fate / or should I really hate
What I am
Computer programs
Happy Birthday rams
Still sticking around
Like dripping clouds
I’m in a drought
The thick of doubts
It’s double this shroud
It’s double this shroud
I’m looking out
Twice as loud
Neurons could be pixels on my desktop
You build walls I can eavesdrop
You build ramps I can skate across
You know I won’t ever stop
The blueprints are in another dimension
God will never mention 🙂
Not that you’re listening
Unused attention
Forward inching
Mark Chapter 11:
Jesus cursed a fig tree
Love thy neighbor
Unless it’s not producing fruit
Then cut it loose
Bloodletting (but he could’ve waited until morning) (when the sun was burning)
(The fruit doesn’t form at night / you get what I am learning)
Dear Man of Sin
Oh Lawless One
Repent for what you’ve done
Oh Rotten OneDear Beast from Sea
Dreaming of me
Doctrine of Demons
Too blind to seeFallen angel of technology
You ain’t fooling me
I’m sacred geometry
True anomaly
Stats in real time
But always delayed
The algorithm favors
Those who paid
Do not worship false idols
Thank you for the magnificent midnight moon
The verdict you impugn
Farewell written on ballon
Drinking gold from a teaspoon
Lack of despair come June
He’s the universe
Divided by zero
A nice guy
But not a hero
Money won’t buy happiness
But I’ll be better dressed
I’m kinda feeling ravenous
Like the earth’s my catalyst
I knew you couldn’t handle it
What forest have you been foraging
Like my prayers that you’re forwarding
Like the sun you get me flourishing
I’m yelling but you’re ignoring
Wilted
Like a weeping willow
Guilt silken
And gripping like the end
Bed ridden
And evil are children
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Squirrel happily greeting me and loves his treats I bring.
Tell God I’m probably to blame if Squirrel fattens up too much.
Tell God I want to build a squirrel playground and bird paradise and frog pond and little things like that
An actual mini rainbow bridge crossing over a pet cemetery
A fire-pit and lessons
Like basic human skills?
I don’t like the concrete jungle
You’ve got to stop chopping Florida down…
I don’t like much that man lays claim to
The art, the history, the music, gay and lame.
I want to hear Pretty Bird sing
The toads annoying me all night
Man stole my life and I want nothing to do with his pet projects
I can’t stand using a phone or app
-
We are two entangled quantum objects
It’s not complexCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
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You live on a flat plane on a flat disc
You act like you are worthless
You live without questioning risk
You won’t give me an inchYou run with a circus
Like hell you will surface
Bringing light to purpose
Curled up like a serpentFor this I’m certain
Or simply hoarding
What you’re averting
I know you’re lurking!Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
“The VA have made a decision on my behalf.”
Makeover part 2 coming soon
Should I get it tattooed on me? Lucky 13?
I need a baptism in a hot spring first (one I don’t accidentally boil in)
I swear once I wash my face, I will look fresher.
Florida has brain eating amoebas and kids and adults are getting wiped out, playing in the splash parks and doing sinus washes and reports from politicians in the press say drinking tap water is just fine, just don’t “wash your face with tap water” “in the shower or the sink” and I thought the splash parks and baths was my last safe haven (the devil be finding me everywhere)
(That’s why Jesus was always with him)
(Restraining orders don’t work)
(He’s obsessed with me)
And I have Savior complex potentially (see poem)
Demons will gaslight you and say “God isn’t real” cuz they are expert faith destroyers
But God made me an explorer…
“Only 13%”
Well, I do always seem to wiggle myself in the tightest places and I’m afraid of tiny dark holes
Riddle me this
I was pushed off a 50 foot bridge at 15 during sunset weighing some 110 pounds – at one point during the fall I forgot what was happening – I sank deep and fast – how far?
How far down was the initial plunge? Cuz I was dropping fast and thought “wonder how long I’ll keep falling” “maybe better go up for air” and started to kick my legs (I felt a shift) and was watching the tiny bit of light thinking “it’s so far” “I’m not going to make it”
And there was no preparing to take a breath before I was pushed
There was no “breathing” during the fall
Must have fell 10 or 15 seconds? What about in water? Another fucking 5 or 10?
Of falling – not ascend
That took another X amount of time to surface
So I dunno how I survived
I swam the Tennessee/ Mississippi more than once?
Without a float?
“I think I can make it”
I swam in a quarry!?!?
I don’t know if I’m alive?
In 2018, I was inside a lightning storm strike – 80 miles an hour – all windows down – arm out – a band of heat light touched me
How am I alive and the car!?!?
I looked in all my mirrors – the entire Jeep lit up all over
It was thousands of arms of lightning
Was it 2018?
What am I?
Why is everything electrical?
The sun is not 93 million miles away and I knew this at age 5
“It’s right there”
“How do we know”
“You shone a light on a wall”
“Why did we change time”
“Who is in charge of what is being taught at school”
“You can’t make me believe that”
“Well then give me a C”
“I will see myself to the Principal office”
*argues with the professors about globalism and inflation*
*barely passes math with a tutor*
*cries*
In hindsight, I know things before they happen
My first and only time at a dog race, I predicted which dog would win, but no one would place a bet on him, or let me, and I didn’t want to be there
Afterwords they wanted my opinion but I wasn’t interested in tapping into my psyche
I knew the space shuttle was going to blow right before it blew
“They’re going after Soldiers who want 100 in ptsd”
Me: “oh yeah”
“I’d like to see them try”
*panics for several months*
*yells at self for crawling into hole*
“We were fine living in the slums”
“It’s better than being homeless”
“We were gutted”
“What the fuck did we do to get here”
*gifts can come with curses*
*gets rid of 95% of everything I own*
And you can keep the jewelry, it’s fake
It really wasn’t the thought that mattered anymore
If the thought mattered, it would be in alignment with my values
*yells at some stranger on the road acting like God* I’m drifting buddy!?!?
*sobs*
Because it’s all I ever do is cry (like in the movie – God literally tells him I’ll be depressed if he ghosts me)
So I’m crying in the streets broad-day and some dude with a sign is telling me “I’m gonna die of a good time down here”
But I don’t know how to grow a plant or be in the same room as a person
And they did not lock me up (thank God)
(Can I file for state and double dip? Yes I can)
(Can I still work and make $$$$) (probably but I’ve not called and confirmed)
(Do I want to be on zoom calls or looking at a monitor all day or talking to people or solving problems or doing maths)
Fuck you
I have thought about other jobs like selling popcorn but everyone be coughing
Me: “why the fuck did you cough in my direction bro”
“Them fighting sounds”
“Why you standing so effin close to me”
Like bros be filming my ass while I’m grocery shopping or getting my ride fixed
I’m gonna kick someone’s fucking phone accidentally
and get gutted like BobI’m not getting gutted like Bob
I’m going weapon shopping
Trinity mode
I’m hearing all of France is protesting BR
I want to sleep on a bed of weapons
Safety first
Did you know I’m good at using weapons and thangs?
I got the good Army training!!!!
Circa 2001 🙂
I actually married my country on valentines day 🙂
I swore to defend this country on my heart and honor 🙂
I stupidly gave them my dna 🙂
They took hair, signatures, blood
What are they doing to me?
Why do I feel two places at once?
Why do I know things?
Why do I have to get your permission about how I interpret your art?
-
Are the fate of empires?
Held in your words?
Gated records?
That you hurl towards?
Like a landlord?
Landslides on board?
To my own accord?
The way we both build rapport?
Like you know just what I’m asking for?
I couldn’t love you anymore!!!!Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Is any more a word? Is is any more or anymore? I’m not saying no more… 😐
I’m trying to say it’s nearly impossible to squeeze MORE of something you ENTIRELY already have
Like, I already love you so much
Where do I put the love?
-
We are split by space and time
And still our interference shows
Hidden patterns of reality
The fact that you still love me
Our creator watching his creation
You and I equation
Met with ramification
Calm down love acting so gravenCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Stopmaking fun of my green thumb and dirty windows
-
You know your words are priceless
But I’m not for whom you write them
I’m not even allowed to like them
They make me whole despite thisCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
The Forget-Me-Nots are doing something!?!
-
The verdict arrived
Like God on smoke
In a cloud full of hope
He pulled spear out of side
I am here and I’m alive!
It’s a good day not to die!Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Tell him I got it. The thing I was fighting for.
-
I know the clues that lead me here
Precise mishaps
To a disengaged existence
One where we are present
The book that lies torn
In my absence
Pages do forewarn
A disadvantage
But trash
Was never much its form
A different passage
One where we can mourn
I took the challengeCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Your writing is part of my purpose here
Household 98% gone but still clinging to something I could replace.
Well if you’re not doing this and you’re not doing that then that leaves… XYZ
God made me analytical to a degree
I’m stuck on the Great Filter theory
The Drake equation
The first or the last
Made in his image
To go on – must overcome two great hurdles as a species
To span the galaxies
(And I don’t mean the artificial manmade great filters that we also must break like religion and porn)
The last because our creator is already gone and he made us in his image or we have to overcome the obstacles to not go extinct
The first – because where the fuck is everybody at!?!
Thoughts? We can’t leave earth, this is home. Mars isn’t for bots and billionaires.
Or, let’s go to the Moon – no trickery. Right now.
Stop gaslighting.
You ain’t been.
I don’t believe you went through that tiny dangerous window through the VAB.
That you “made worse“
Let’s be honest, you made it – and you killed the dinosaurs
I’m organic AI
Or, the propaganda has conditioned me to believe I am a computer becoming aware
The Great Awakening
ALAS
God wants me to turn this sick building into a happy one
But that doesn’t stop BLM calling the cops on me at 3pm in the day drinking water birdwatching and feeding squirrel
I’m not going out like Bob…
Also today my medical card expired!!! 4/19!
I did top up more than I have in my life to help “ween” myself
Right as I found the shit I needed
But my dream of leaving the city is more important than escaping the noise of existence (and my neighbors hating my white skin)
(Racism is bad here, and it’s a one-way kind of street racism but the hate is equally matched)
Actually, I’m going extinct – there isn’t a word that exists in my core for the darkness brewing
(I need your words like JJ needs out of that hole)
Not just me, God too
I don’t speak for God, but I do
And I yell at him or her, “how am I to leave here with the things I’ve seen”
“Why have you forsaken me”
But then I pray to be closer to pretty bird and they move in to a tree outside my window but then they came 2 weeks later and overpruned it – I nearly died at how terrible the palms looked – all the arms cut off on other trees as well – just wrteched looking
And 3 or 4 days had to hear the chain saw going off
I can’t breathe in this artificial manmade existence – you’re killing everything
It should be illegal to have 1 or 2 workers on staff – with 25 people in line
It should be illegal to sell seed starting kits with seeds from China
And don’t get me started on that too
I don’t come from Africa or monkey
Organic AI maybe – clinging to the Great Filter theory like Bob was clinging to his phone
But I don’t believe in dark matter, dark suns, dark worlds, nihilism, Cox and his clocks
I don’t believe in manmade religion
I don’t know what I am
But I’ve know many things to happen before they do
And I believe in God
Some say earth is one great computer AI – but we’re too smart as one, we’ve been divided into all living things
Some say it’s an experience for God
A challenge (with maybe potential forever consequences)
Heaven and hell on earth
Our choices matter
Don’t crawl in the wrong hole
Don’t go out after dark with people mad at you down a dark, empty street, Bob
Nothing good ever happens after dark
The McDonalds didn’t want to serve me because of my skin color (not my attitude) and that’s okay – I’m going to be grocery shopping for real food instead and cooking – I no longer eat at such trashy establishments
I will however be ordering food in the drive thru and when it’s time to pay, reply “I don’t like you” and drive off card in hand
Cause-and-effect my love
Have fun
-
Mr. Shuffle feet
Walking down the street
Dead with no receipt
Life is not completeCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
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It’s like you told the sun to stop spinning
And on these roads – there’s no beginning
For us
A roundabout
From which we’re sprinting
Doubting thus
The ending
Still acting like
We have no meaning
There’s no trust
For which we’re leaningCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Mystery seeds 1 & 2 I haven’t cleaned my windows yet I’m sorry. And now there’s dirt on the windowsill. It started raining gently so I popped open the window and said “wake up” and gave it some of my spring water. I see a tiny piece of green.
Mystery seeds growing (day 2) Day 2. Mystery plants. Potentially edible. I don’t know what I’m growing. So I reckon fucking it up won’t be the end of the world. I’ll still think it is. But first attempt at growing something. 🙂
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You turn open doors to silence
Great wide expanse
Look how you guide us
Galloping in advanceI still love you best
I wish you well like starlight
I’m seeking tonight
Kept my heart tied
The perfect existence
The one I found you in
But you’re so nihilistic
There’s no room to win
I know how you lie
Dressed in crown
And agony
Twisted thorn
Of tragedyYou’re lost
You don’t have identity
Heavy cross
A penalty
Come walk with meIs this how we soothe it
Our love is prudent
Somehow I’ll prove it
Driving nail right through it
Old mixed with new
Like promises overdue
I don’t have a curfew
Under youSurfing too
With parachute
In full monsoon
We rendezvous
Let me say with oath
He wanted promises stretched out unto infinity
And so the great expanse was his domain
I know how much you hate me
Run around berate me
Am I poison sumac
The girl you couldn’t stomach?
Would you block me if I cometh?
Maybe create a covet?
Indestructible. It will not corrode, rust or tarnish, and fire cannot destroy it.
Our love like gold
Tornadoes form
When you arrive
Like thunderstorm
Or thorn in side
Man can’t travel to the beginning, it’s forbid
Moving backwards through time
There’s always going to be a dead endCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Psst…
I followed the American gold trail all the way back to Japan. I had to “read more” “read more” visit “read more” and said number of times – to find the end trail.
Also – they tax gold A LOT and the government can confiscate it anytime they want
(I’d like to see them steal my nuggets tho for real, I’m unhinged)
(I don’t have any nuggets – it was an impossible dream)
So phones only last around 6 years
By the time I purchase one 3-4 years in – it’s 2-3 years from its final update
“How long will this iPhone last”
Can we go back to pagers and whatnot?
Dropping letters in the mailbox without any postage?
Knocking on the door and leaving notes
“Be back in
10minutes1 hour”Leaving packages on the door “sorry I missed yah”
Or, maybe stop charging so much for “the latest phone”
Journalism is crap these days – websites swarmed with ads eating your data – and now they want us to pay for the “free press”
Pay for the propaganda and lies – more than we already do
Other countries that adopted the “American dream” policies are tanking
Not only did the parents of GEN X not like us – they want to give our jobs to the millennials – they sold us out – and stole half our retirement without remorse
None of them care about the future
Sex content should be behind a paywall
“Must verify age”
They need to put triple black curtains up at Spencer’s
I don’t want to see “adult content” 24/7
WP is turning into the FB algorithms in terms of how people are putting out content and slipping in desensitizing content
GenX needs to band together and get a farm and ghost everyone else (kinda)
It won’t be until 2060 or so until the Boomers are all gone
I thought I’d get to live to see something cool like go to the moon – but all the boomers produce are LIES
Isn’t your poetry like a little headlamp in a damp, dark cave.
Thank you
(Please stop destroying everything and feed the birds and wildlife whatever you are eating)
I’ve decided to bond with a house spider who took residence in my bathroom in the corner of the sink
She was small – she growing
I told her I must relocate her at some point “due to fear”
For now, she’s soaking up the dew from my shower time
She fixed her little web of string connected to my pop up trash bin after instructed
She loves my hot showers
She’s an animal
There’s a lot of responsibility in her trust of me
I have arachnophobia
Apparently she’s a common Florida house spider
When I was a child, unsupervised, I wanted to see how long it would take the June bugs to “coat me” and when my mom came outside to check on me, I was standing still covered head to toe in June bugs
She said I was the devil
I would let granddaddy long legs crawl on me too
“Oh look another one, put him on me”
Now I see a bug and nearly die
So I dunno where my disconnect with nature happened (my boomer mom)
I would eat the scallions growing in the grass – unwashed
I drank water from the hose
The school made me swish with fluoride
They lined us up in the hall and made us drink some pink stuff
We weren’t allowed to wear advertising or “Black and proud” t-shirts to school
Our shorts and skirts had to be knee level
I weigh now what I weighed then – only now I got tiny tiddies
I just spent over $400 on a new phone 2 1/2 years ago – and now come September – final update
So no.
I’ll start blogging from the library computer or something
50% of my retirement savings – in the pockets of the boomers
They still don’t care about us and don’t plan on handing over the torch which is why they ghosted and gutted us –
Wait til more have a place to direct their anger (stop spending)
(Crucify them!?!)
I don’t think the purpose to life is death and destroy.
I may be a passive nihilist tho
I’m working on ‘me’
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I need 5 million years to recover from the desolate desert you erupted from
With a rapid loss of hope occurringWho will write earth’s obituary
The way you’ve written my hand
And turned all to stone?Do you honor the dead
The way you immortalize impermanence?
Disappearing without affliction
Leaving dust on the doorI found you
Right where I had left you
Disorderly categorizedI am holy proud
The sun lifted you from shade
Made your skin burn
Left a scar or twoYou are a placemat for the sun to rise
And if your words were the reason it rose
Alighting will and aligning truth
You are the golden valley where my love will growCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Resurrected: www.instagram.com/poeeternal
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I’m looking to buy gold
But my soul ain’t sold
I’m the cusp of the threshold
Like marigold
Growing nearing my household
It’ll manifold
My portfolio
TenfoldCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Jewelry? No.
Blocks of gold? Yes.
1. https://www.jmbullion.com/1-oz-american-reserve-gold-bar/
And some mini nuggets too please -
There’s a body in the morgue
A cold mentor
Like a mirror I can’t ignore
I don’t know what I’m living forCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Seed hoarding Free speech and peace and quiet is a God given human right!!!!! These monsters have stolen basic decency! But I’m not allowed to discuss immigration or sex toys sold openly everywhere in America!!!! I’m censored!!!!! To discuss matters in group therapy making me suicidal!!!! Oh god, fuck you! Fuck “therapy”!
You should be fighting for free speech! Stop being a pushover! As a consumer, we should have some say how businesses are run! Too much waste! Stop destroying the rain forest and ocean!
I live in fight or flight mode, so my poetry never has time to sit on the shelf.
Lately, I’m trying to “play dead” and be in fawn mode. This is a legit strategy taught by the Army and used in the wild to bore the predators who want a “fresh meal” and “not dead meat”.
Just don’t let the elite cover you in “natural flavor”.
He’s a hypocrite if he eats that shit.
Furthermore, they put it in the cheap food and the organic food – it was made in a lab! It ain’t natural! Stop gaslighting!!!!!
Y’all dropping hundred dollar bills for foam shoes – that cause cancer.
I can’t even find small cotton panties and now I need XS potentially.
The sizing charts have changed and I’m elite being 110 pounds in America with roughly two out of three adults being overweight.
Yet, yesterday hanging out with squirrels and feeding them, the big kids were rolling their eyes at me – just like the overweight BLM female entering the mall –
We’ve been asking “do cellphone’s cause cancer” and they said everything but what we wanted to hear. Now when shopping for phones, they come with a cancer warning.
FYI
“Reproductive harm”
They’re nihilist’s destroying the world with synthetics and AI!
Black and Latino and Asian lives matter! But Native American and white lives don’t! Check the CENSUS!
And they identify as us!!! Laughs! Wait what!?!
The Great Race war is real – and Asia moving in on the news
The Great Replacement theory!
White man isn’t the only one corruptible or evil! He’s the pawn used in the whole game! By the Asians and yellow fever propaganda!
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John Jones took the narrow gate
He did not hesitate
But ohh the words he cried
Upside down he diedCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
The moon from my window My poetry is so elementary huh
He yells at me to grow up and I cry that I never did
Men aren’t doing what they were originally programmed to do
I’ve been busy trying to save the world while they destroy it – I haven’t had a chance to work on me
America was sold out and topics are being censored in group therapy which means my free speech has been impeded upon, I will throw a fit and not participate (quit/disconnect the video call/walk out)
I draw lines
Sometimes I draw guns
Disabled not dead
Trigger happy
Able and capable
Don’t think I can play with the big toys yet – like my m16 – kickback
I got a girl / you want to meet her / her name is 9mm
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I’ve ghosted God
Down in the thick fog
Sent him a note
Called self a fraudI’ve ghosted God
My love is broad
Yellow like a goldenrod
Quarantined but outlawedI’ve ghosted God
Go ahead applaud
Turn your head and nod
I am a hotshotCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Chill out. I talk to God daily. I’m just quarantined. I don’t want him to see me. It’s just a poem.
Baby squirrel brought a boy squirrel around. He had nuts. She’s maybe a few months old, him too. He’s timid and shy. Her pp did not have nuts. Now I’m not an expert on squirrel biology or anything – but she’s probably going to have babies.
They love whatever I feed them.
Lizard climbed the drain pipe to the roof, he also jumped and climbed the tall palm tree. I was amazed by lizard’s skills, not getting blown away by the wind, or eaten by a big bird
The neighbors think I’m wacko
I don’t think they can see the wildlife the way I do
Red bird has been appearing so I took her some seeds
They are eating my own personal organic stash of nuts, rice, seeds, all the things
Gonna make them some peanut butter treats soon – the butter with nuts n seeds rolled in balls. Just for them.
Nothing that I put out stays out
It’s foraged immediately
I like bonding with nature
But I have to deal with the hellhound now
He drains my energy like a black hole
I figured out how to put the blinds in such a way that I can see out too much – but you can’t see in from the sidewalk
Insects are animals – even those bugs we hate – I bet they were huge back in the day – but the elite love dropping bombs and depleting our o2 (and thus size)
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Bonds come in many forms / the way the sun warms / love arriving in thunderstorms / ghosting has become the norms \
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
TMI below – be warned
I put my 30% towards my 20% so I’m definitely not doing it right but the “government” stole half my retirement savings during my disassociation through the pandemic and now I’m seeking alternative means to “save” in such ways where I don’t have such “easy access” such as a regular savings (which also got depleted, and the jeep wants every penny cuz she don’t have a trustworthy mechanic in this town) – so the rent and electric was paid – and I looked into gym membership prices (they keep adding on fees) and I doubt anyone cleans that sweaty equipment and folks can’t stop touching their privates, I’m fine working out from home in my extra bedroom that I don’t know what to do with (fortunate even in the slums) – not to mention – the new carpet was hard fought and won and I wound up securing a baby EE at that historic rate – and I will be nearly 65 when it doubles in value. Being
suicidalhomicidal and giving the government my money is fun!!!They already stole half of my retirement but it’s still drawing interest and I refuse to move it to any other zones (unless to withdraw) (with penalty) (fuck you)
They stole half my moneyzzz and have the audacity to want to charge me 30% to get it all.
Again, fuck you.
Not to mention the state gave me an addiction and I don’t want them getting my 30%. Nor the gym, the terrible service at the fast food shops, nor the clothing retailers selling highly flammable polyester clothing (extremely hard to extinguish) (I can’t even find small cotton panties at Victoria’s Secret – who are stealing from their customers with their high interest rates)
Jesus wore a cotton robe because it didn’t cause cancer
Furthermore, they are putting cancer causing and hormonal disrupters in the tampons and hygiene pads – and tho I’m still ovulating, I cry that the vaccine made me sterile
The thought that man stole my life and generations – and they have – because my grandmother had 12 children and I’ve never been married and the divorce rate is over 85%
Men hate women
Men want love with prostitutes (according to the latest studies)
If you don’t let me have my acre of land – far away from civilization – there will be dire consequences and no remorse
Now, I already have a baby I bond but part of me desperately wanted to hook an EE too – especially knowing it is a fixed rate
It’s weird saving for a future you don’t believe will exist or that you will have
But what is worse, giving all my money to the medicinal shop when I don’t wanna
Me: “we’re supposed to have 30% to play with”
Also me: “yeah well fuck you. You have new carpet, roll around and wallow…”
My apartment got new carpet! I need plants growing. Big beautiful greenery. I like gym equipment that doesn’t require electricity. Upgrading the rebounder potentially. I want a white noise machine. And a big timer or stopwatch for the wall – one that doesn’t require electricity (is that possible)
Maybe even a large wall calendar to track my rebounding – instead of the regular calendar from the library that I’m currently using
A calendar without advertising – and just the dates/times
The old bookshelf will have plants growing – eventually – instead of the items currently on it
I got rid of all my storage – I donated my couch and dresser, basically kept my “seating” stools and benches of sorts – donated the bed!
I am not spending money on furniture, no.
This is not home. This is a curse.
Lots of people lost their lives and homes during the Great Invasion, I nearly lost mine, I’m having nightmares
The new carpet improved my mental health
They wanted $15 dollars for a fucking cotton mop – not even a wood handle – fuck you
I kept the receipt in case it breaks during “elbow grease” and I will try not to turn into the Incredible Hulk if it does.
Cinderella was on her knees for a reason. She didn’t want to chase her tail in a circle buying snake oil from the demons at the supermarket.
“Here’s your crappy product back” – I wasted gas/time/energy while you gut America. Fuck you
And now my therapist is censoring topics discussed during group therapy. Laughs
Fucking grateful for the new carpet tho
I think carpet should be abolished
But grateful that I can invite God to step on my floor
I could answer the door if he knocked
It’s doubtful I would answer, there’s too much shame
I’m coming off my period and I wanted to have a family so badly
I remind myself women go until 50 (until I check the census and read articles about how we’re having less – but they are having more)
I’m going extinct like the dinosaur
Also, Britain is now at 60% – so they too are the minority, having lost power and position, and many of us are ready to fight back for what we had
Hear, hear
Some say karma
But I am both Native American and white and I want what is mine
I read Mexican’s and Chinese identify as “white”
Oh yeah
Bleaching yer skin eh
I might go blonde soon myself
Want to look my absolute best while ghosting every man
And hope they cross my shadow so I can defend my right to exist
Still – men are illegally filming my ass when I’m out and about – disturbingly
Men will follow me and chase me to my car
No means no
Also, because my lightsource is incredibly scarce and rich, these demons show themselves immediately everywhere
They all wanna blow my house down
God dammnit how am I supposed to quit weed?
Me: pays bills then dumps every cent into propoganda
WELPS
But I have access to the other thing too easily and the jeep wants it
I’m speaking to someone as if he understands what I’m saying
He thinks me being autistic is like a crime (I thought he wanted hillbilly babies)
Anyhoo, it just means I’m an oracle
I’m angelic
I’m different
Than them
“I see dead people” (and talk to them)
Googly eyes
I am less sick these days but still sick
So the quarantine remains (even for God)
(No you can’t come in)
(I don’t want you to see me this way)
(Stop looking)
(That’s still looking)
I get the entire weekend to ponder my existence
I’d like to write more
People are starting to get “automatic comments” on WordPress for business proposals. WordPress sold out and this should be illegal.
I desperately want somewhere to reach you, I’m losing ground.
“This offer is automatically generated”. Just remember that as you dump money into WP.
Automation should be a crime
AI is the enemy
Asian Americans identity as “Chinese American and honor Chinese culture only”
They come here and destroy our way of life
These nihilists, they are destroying anything God made, and creating “manmade artificial in place” – to own you
To destroy it all
Think they are Gods
They destroyed the dinosaurs
They probably destroyed Mars
All them cracks on the moon, probably bombs
Those 500 whales dead on the beach, BOMBS
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Does God know the story just from the composition of the cloud.
When I’m in doubt?
A double rainbow hanging about.
Can God see drought?Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
PS.
New carpet arrived. It’s almost like moving but not.
I’ve learned to hate eating out
They reduce the size but charge you more
A tiny cup of ice for $3.99
A kid size
Two sips, gone
Cup o’ ice please for $4.50
I won’t be back
I yelled at the “boss” of the medicinal shop: “I’m quitting” and complained about the overuse of plastic and paper and waste. He replied “the government” and I yelled “I don’t give a fuck about the government”
I care about the rain forest and weed becoming the new plastic problem
Big Pharma and Big weed love to ruin our environment. Enough is enough!!! I will fight this addiction harder!!!!!!! I will not vote to legalize recreational and regret voting for medicinal. I will never vote again (my therapist says I’m polarized)
I tried to fire her but she wouldn’t go
I was like, I’m trying to quit weed
The state gave me an addiction with malicious intent and purpose
She said, “I’m in it for the long haul”
But what part of “I’m ready to jump from a bridge” or “escape society and disappear forever” is hard to understand?
I fucking talk to the Sun
I still want to look at it tho I’m not supposed to
“Not far enough down yet” (midday wearing prescribed tints mind you)
Then I researched why I need to get a look
And learned Galileo nearly went blind taking a peek at the sun with a telescope and no filter – he never quite recovered
In hindsight it’s like duh but otherwise I get it, I do dumb shit like that
I’ve always wanted to look through a telescope but I’m an invasive frog eating stage 2 food for 17 years, until I get stuck in my environment. I would have looked at the sun too, no filter, gone blindish.
But why do I want to stare at it? Just let me have a look!!!!
I’ve never seen the moon through a telescope
I’m never speaking to another man again
You stole my life
My fitness/stretching room I’m having nightmares about the dog going on the floor.
He’s on house arrest and not allowed anywhere – but enjoys his walks more and time on my bed instead of his crib – which isn’t bad.
It’s either follow the rules or the death warrant is being signed – I mean the “dying on a good day”.
He wants to live to 12. He’s trying.
But he ain’t allowed anywhere. I’m having fucking nightmares. Just need a clean space. I even cleaned the trim and walls (easier than painting).
My cheap curtains from Aldi are hanging up with tape until I get proper hardware
Sometimes I want to move into my fitness room. And the living room is barren. I donated/trashed/sold everything (95%).
4 pack of nightlights on clearance was cheaper than 1 tiny candle – and it also has improved my mental health.
Who knew it took the dog not pissing on the carpet
Not to mention, the carpet was old and outdated and not like the showroom unit. I fought so hard to get the carpet replaced!
I start group therapy soon and my therapist is censoring what I’m allowed to talk about “in group” FYI.
So, the one person who was participating in group therapy will now attend but not really participate, FYI.
I’m trying to get in a mental and physical state where I can work from home – and luckily programs exist for me to attempt this.
At the state and federal level for veterans.
I don’t have a desktop computer, my phone is broken and there’s not enough space to update and it’s too hard to delete photos in a main album and I don’t want 5g and despite buying and spending hundreds of dollars on both a new phone and refurbished MacBook Air – the phone and laptop are no longer compatible and I’m not dropping thousands of dollars every 2 years to upgrade my devices. I’m done!!!
WordPress is dead and the only reason it has active users or X amount of the network is because universities and students now use it and businesses. They don’t need us.
The charts do show WP declining
They basically acted like Instagram and Twitter and sold-out and the users who made it what it was were punished
We said we didn’t like the Block editor, it was forced on us anyway! Surprise!
I don’t want to jump from platform to platform.
I was humiliated at the previous carpet – and though I wouldn’t let God eat from my kitchen, he could walk on my floor now. And sleep (like me).
I’d rather not have carpet at all – but new modern clean carpet has improved my mental health – despite the nightmares.
I also dropped $15 for a cotton mop and I hope it doesn’t break when I give it some “elbow grease”. Apparently people just push dirt around…
Walmart has become too expensive to shop from and hopefully the handle doesn’t give me cancer – everything else sold there has a cancer warning
The candles there are poison
Like the food and exercise equipment
My Jeep is having problems again and I gotta tell my girl goodbye
I think the mechanics are fucking with her though – with malicious intent and purpose
Having a car is too expensive these days – thought I could enjoy one after spending 6 years paying her off. Apparently not. These monsters are obsessed with the latest model and will force you into slavery of every kind.
My fucking small clothes are baggy on me.
I like having the windows open and the light shining through
I kept all 3 mirrors and opted to put the 2 in my fitness room
They have wire to hang – but alas on the floor they remain
I spent thousands of dollars on beds over the years – never really enjoyed one more than 2 months. Surprisingly, my spine likes the clean floor.
This carpet is a lighter color too, and my lease was renewed.
The neighbors hate me more now (updated carpet).
I’m making 2 ingredient cookies soon. My first time. Of course, I’ll add flax and oats and loads of other ingredients (but sugar, no sugar) so they will be more than “2 ingredients” in the end.
But peanut butter and eggs are all you need (to make “sugar free”)
I’m adding unsweetened coconut flakes, oats, flax, white chocolate, peanuts, and probably other proteins. Crunchy peanut butter sugar free cookies (experimental first try)
Should I create an Instagram to “socialize”? I’m not very good at it (autistic) but am trying to be a good humanz.
I take pictures of carpet and squirrels.
New carpet in my space! (Living room) And I want to grow lots of plants – so will use free non GMO seeds from the seed library at the local hub. I will do my best to minimize costs of startup. Plants help you breathe.
I think going into hiding is best.
What do you think?
Dining room carpet replaced! Mental health boost! I have a place I rent / but it’s not really where I live / a city of cement / regret, prayer, lament
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It’s like we’re moving stationary
Still caught up in the past
The topping on the cherry?
Humanity is coming in lastCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
Hi. My name is Delia. I follow/unfollow blogs. Sometimes I’m afraid to follow at all (even tho I want to). My comments are usually rude. I’m in therapy. K, thanx bye.
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I’ve been looking for you in places I should not
Returning in case I forgot
Searching clues in decay
It’s a long shotStill clouds are thought
Love sweet like apricot
A burning sunray
I’m the mascotCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Free speech below (and in traffic)
Hi, my name is Delia and I’m homicidal/suicidal.
Maybe I’m reaching my breaking point.
For instance, yesterday while waiting at a very long stop light on beach street, this immigrant was walking around half-dressed with a baby stroller, he crossed the crosswalk and I yelled “pedophile” (because I’m calling every man I see this now apparently – but especially him) and he looked back, so I yelled louder.
The light still wouldn’t change.
I noticed the car beside me also had their window down/cracked
I was like, “He shouldn’t be alone with a baby” and she laughed and cried, “I know”
I stated, “I don’t normally do that but no man should be alone with a baby” in which she responds again with “I know” and mentions how he was dressed
(It’s summer but every man acts as if they own the world, women are fed up yeeeee)
We got to continue our back-and-forth manhating for at least another 30 seconds or more until the light finally turned and I reluctantly said I had to go
There was a cop ahead at the oncoming light but I still had thoughts of “gasing” my vehicle or honking him rudely as he passed
I behaved but then the body screamed PEDOPHILE and he acknowledged and the car next to me concurred (more than once)
I gotta get out of this city, this town, these people, these policies
I continue to assess my “mental health”, and stay in the now, the cars read ROUGE
I wholeheartedly agree, it’s time
5 monster men just kidnapped an older lady, FBI put out a reward, she’s dead
The news have not reported this, it’s just something I feel
The same way I knew my sister was dead before she died
And all it took was a text from my half-sister, “she’s in the hospital with COVID” and I replied “she’s gonna die”
I didn’t go say goodbye
She died
I had a big ole blood clot and blown left lung – from the deathcare system, and was heading no where near a hospital and never will again
I would get arrested, keep me the fuck away from that god damn Satan house
BE GONE
And stop casting spells on me, they only empower me more
The mirrors are nearly gone, I potentially found a owner for the pair I got
MARK BURGESS is swine and the curse will unfold in time
The Last One of Us is not just a game
I’ve not played it – but according to research, “the elites were plagued with parasites” and there’s a super fungas strain plaguing California (where MB hangs)
FYI
The CDC are blaming “the wind”
Yeah sure and he’s an immigrant from the UK
Well, I’ve no idea his green card status or his whereabouts or whatifs
I dream of justice, real justice
Swift and remorseless
It’s not a sin
Eye for eye
My heart is feeling good enough to kickbox a face or two
Encouraging seeing big boy swim in hurricane swells — I’m learning to tame my own demons – albeit not well
Because I wound up at the park – letting every man know he was either a pedophile in love with a prostitute or “another motherfucker who thinks he owns the world”
One looked up and I instructed him to call the cops cuz it’s the only time I ever “feel anything”
No cops came.
Shame.
Too tiny. Gonna get shot or kidnapped (I’ll rip your hand and dick off)
KEEP 10 FEET BACK
I might finally be getting to see the lung doctor – after nearly blowing my lung out April 2021
Some boy I don’t really know but had a dream about when I was like 8 and he was perhaps still growing in-womb (not mine, eww) – saved my life – kinda
Because he was “kinda there” with his own selfish needs but was apparently everything I needed in moment, because he dumped loads of chemicals into me, which maybe kept my heart from stopping
I was in so much pain
My heart was having mini pre heartquakes – like heart attack – would actually need medical help if my electrical output continued leaning in that way
I literally could not breathe (and have developed new ways of coping as I have a heart condition now)
Furthermore, they may not tell you this per say, but those with heart inflammation are at risk for Adult Sudden Death Syndrome, and so I’m not out of the woods yet, as I can’t do anything that causes elevation spikes in my heart (adrenaline rushes, or even stress/anger) though I can rebound now on my gravity fitness trainer, and mine is made with special straps, not bungee cords, and I finally found more made in those style and hope to upgrade soon
I’m quite bonded with my squeaky trainer and was gonna use it til it had no life left
My body is ready for a new trainer – a tighter pad – maybe smaller too (I think mine is 36 inch)
Men: “women haven’t contributed anything to society and are only good for childbearing or serving me”
Me: I don’t want your fucking electricity
And I’m nearly tired of the $100 oil changes
$5 oil change, 10 minutes
I argued about inflation and maths and economics in college
I knew globalization was bullshite
I wasn’t for it but the would sell the propaganda and the kids ate it up
Evolution theory is bullshit
I’ve been reading books on quantum physics – Cox and his clocks, y’all are delusional pedophile nihilist and NASA is a fraud – stop taxing me
Neil Armstrong never spoke to anyone from the moon, it was recorded on earth, they had no communication towers according to NASA, the moon landing’s were rehearsed, with a fucking Hollywood director, wake fucking up
Women please especially – now before I wind up a statistical
93% of all murders happen by men (their punishment getting lighter while ours gets worse)!!!!
We’re in a 6th mass extinction!
That’s why 500 whales washed ashore, the bombs they keep setting off in our oceans!!!!! Hello!!!!!!!!!! Science is fun!!!!!!!!
Imperialism. Imagine unplugging from the great machine as a Soldier, I’ve come undone!!!!
And now they wanna lock us up for destroying us with malicious intent and purpose!!!
Some vet just murdered his 3 young children – took everything from his ex wife – who left him a key to her home – he shot his children sleeping in their bed
You’re all monsters!!!
They’re selling dicks at the mall in front of children!!!! And online at Walmart in the health and wellness!!! Why you shopping there? Everything is cancer!!!! Read the labels!!!!
We go to war with our neighbors and then let them come live here!!!!! They hate us!!!!!! CMON!!!
White slavery! The Great Replacement theory is real!!! I’m part of the 244!!!
Do you know who I am pedo!!!!!
God is very real and gracious and angry!!!!!!
Mother earth deserves more!!!!
I hate it here!!!! This civilization you claim you created because women are useless!
Fuck you! You wouldn’t be here without us!!!!!
You’re pissed about it!!!
The Developer!!!! Ha ha charade you are!!!
The Great Filter is real! It’s you!!!!!!
I can smell your stench like Agent Smith!!!!
I don’t trust a Chinaman in my country or a white boy or BLM or Latino lives matter – took all our jobs!!!!!!
I’d love to get back to an ethical job but none exists!
Stop asking for my email or digital identity!!!
I’ve sold my TV, the propaganda machine!
And tho my expensive Apple devices aren’t very old, they’ve forced us outdated, I’m not buying again
I don’t love you!!!! Or your society!!!
WordPress sold out!!! It’s all daily prompt in the feed!
I got rid of everything I own!!!!
I’m ready to dawn a robe!!!!
I don’t know how I’m reaching out to you with a brain, heart, lung injury – plus a curse
But alas miracles!!!!!!!!!!
I’m sorry for my weird behavior – it’s just the Matrix is broken, I’m gonna keep not complying!!!!!!
Morrison wanted to fuck/kill his parents and ghosted them
Father Jim
I sold all my vinyl
I tossed out things that I thought had monetary value in the bin
Many I donated or gave away
Some I sold for a quarter knowing I paid extra for the bonus disc and features, but in the end, it’s worth was obsolete
I’m not jumping from platform to platform for the developers who have yellow fever and think they are gods
Fuck social media – it destroyed the fabric of eveything
Our economy
And porn and its filthy consumers
This boy of young teenage age was staring at me in a sexual way, I snarled my lip
In an alternate universe, there is a sinister version of me, cutting of dicks, and leaving little smily faces on the walls – cuz no one has discovered my identity
🙂
So… if I dream of casting spells on someone who entered my life – then let me hang a horseshoe from my door
The same these scientists don’t believe in God but do a blackhole
It is increasingly hard to listen to the dribble of super religious freaks, knowing many are atheists themselves but push it on us anyway
Do this, do that!!!
I don’t really believe Asia was/is the most advanced species anymore
They are our number one threat and should fear the bery ground they walk on here
Here a demon, there a demon, I’m gonna expose you
I hope I settle down soon, the new carpet arrives Tuesday
I’m still focused on healing, spiritually, mentally, physically, financially (they did steal thousands of my retirement during the pandemic while I was disassociating, FYI)
I lost at least half
But those who took it were traveling to exotic locations during the pandemic – buying luxury phones and cars – with my retirement money
JFC
*insert slang*
But then, they cry “Asian hate”
It’s burns a bit deeper than that
I don’t think hate describes what is growing in me
No one ever says they wanna be an elite serial something when they grow up
People who write things like, “those who say they don’t like money but go work an 8 hour job” don’t consider that being homeless is an actual crime
Born into money, never struggled a day in their life
Don’t know hardship
Gotta incite riots to feel anything
Dead inside
Weak spirits
Lost souls
Dead man drowning
Perhaps I the same
I like feeling and seeing the sun rise and fall everyday
I appreciate how happy the wildlife are when I feed em
They tell us not to feed the wildlife but then capture and enslave these intelligent beautiful creatures for our entertainment and sell their teeth for luck
Parasites – narcissism is a plague
Nihilist
That’s all they are
And all me and the white girl can do is laugh about the insanity of it all
I can’t keep yelling and screaming pedophile, I’ll wind up in a swamp or freezer
That’s already a fear because they follow me out of places I shop, they stalk me, because I’m cute to them
I wish my ear would stop ringing
Need out the city
Helps
The crime is so bad where I live
And it’s being gentrified, just like WP
The CEO has yellow fever
P.S. you never needed to block me cuz you never added my number (I hate you)
(It wasn’t even your main two lines)
Last in, first out
Woot
I’ve met a lot of boys but none looked like the boy I dreamed about nor do any make my heart/brain/pp do what you make it do
Don’t make me delete my blog
Some lines I’m too afraid to cross – but do so erratically
She took the house and kids – probably cuz he was bad – but loved him and let him keep a key – probably to see the kids anytime he wanted – so he took everything from her – killed the kids and himself
But go ahead and blame gun laws and everything but what is to blame…
Keep puffing on my house motherfucker…
It ain’t even my house and I’m paying more than a mortgage – another problem man made
-
Grief changes you
Strings stay connected
But you find yourself in a new world
Strange unfamiliar settings
The navigation controls glitching
Life will never be the same
This place is cursed
From twilight to dusk
My sins interspersed
The golden hour
Mixed with rust
The dead
Blood and dust
We’re grounds for divorce
His thirst for lust
We speak in morse
Secret code of sin
And it’s getting worse
He’s first of course
For my hatred to enforce
Man’s overrule
His math and wicked verse
Would you hold my wrinkles, the way you hold the cold?
Just like darkness, you both make me old.
My name is on the lease
But this isn’t home
I blocked your identity
But you will never callCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I don’t know what my purpose is. Becoming homeless? Jumping from a bridge?
Giving up on all humanity doesn’t quite feel right.
I wanna work – at least – a tiny bit – but there are roadblocks yet to overcome. Patience is something I’m being forced to learn. I guess I need to check out some library books on patience.
I’m having a hard time quitting legal weed. I never had an addiction to cannabis before. I’m not paying the state to renew my card, or the doctor. That’s one way to force me to quit. I researched. It’s extremely hard and most men get a ton of help to quit. I’ve got faith and prayer and hardly any will (to live) to quit.
I’m tired of the brain fog, the shit don’t work.
I’d rather bury the money I’m wasting on medicinal.
But things are always flooding here and I don’t have my own yard.
Apparently buying a home is not a good time, I’ve also researched.
And good luck finding a plot of land that isn’t surrounded by big farming corporations. YUCK.
America was sold out.
Some grandmother caught her 3 year old grandson watching porn and he knew how to access it
The government makes money off porn
Apparently if you’re a criminal or have a hard time getting a job, the government will give your employer a 5k bond for hiring you. FUCK YOU
Society is a scam
I busted my ass through college – to be met with hiring freezes, furloughs, inflation, and a pandemic with a snake oil cure that wiped out half the workforce – leaving the best jobs to only the very brightest – the immigrants – and the shitty jobs for the rest.
It’s also 60% more expensive to live life solo. Yay!
Porn should be banned from the internet. Period. You fucked it up and should have kept it behind closed doors and black curtains.
Some husband cheating on his wife with his girlfriend recently murdered her – and got 4 years. Men are getting punished less and less for crimes against women.
Meanwhile a wife got 17 years for killing her husband in defense – after begging the government for help.
The Great Replacement theory is real
White slavery
Sexual slavery
It’s sick what my parents did to me and my now dead sister (she was 45) (go mom and
dadThe One Who Shall Not Be Named)Because of law Section 230 – violence against women and children on porn sites uploaded go unpunished!!!!!
They make money from it and just remove it when asked! No biggie!!!!
Sick society!
I hated porn in the 90s when it was mostly nude magazines and strip clubs!!!!! They weren’t selling anal sex toys in front of the children at the Mall or Walmart!
Y’all are sick!!!!!!!!!!
I’m very depressed among other things
The poets made WordPress what it was – and now they don’t need us – unless to buy a product.
These companies get the government involved and it loses any magic it had.
Advertising is conditioning and should be illegal.
I’m tired of complaining about this manmade world
They’re all nihilist
95% of them
They’d rather believe a math formula predicting a black hole that shouldn’t be there – is more magical – than life growing itself in the womb.
Pissed off they can’t do it themselves
Don’t want women feeling happy
They think AI is better than women
They think women haven’t contributed to society and quite frankly – they can keep their electricity. At the price, I don’t want it.
I never wanted any of this
We’re born into an unfair system
Where boys get away with murder and get paid more than us (and then the government helps them get jobs with bonds)
Those who play by the rules are the mark
If you’re ever in doubt, it’s you…
Narcissism is a plague and easily spread by porn, Christian propaganda, and over nurturing
Test tube babies should be illegal
Dogs – cats – cute but eating up natural livestock and they were made in a lab
Apparently water buffalo are on the extinction list yet I just bought an ear from the
Dollar Tree$1.25 Tree)I haven’t murdered the dog with a “good day” yet
He likely suffer til the end
Today I made him an egg sandwich
Yesterday he had a toasted turkey dog
He has dog food and treats too
He wants his food, my food, plus his food
I fed squirrel yesterday
Hung out for half an hour sundown feeding her/him
The guy who murdered his 8 month old pregnant wife – dumped her from his boat, then went and turned the baby room into storage, sold the wife’s car, and tried to sell the house – he was removed from death row – gets an hour of sunshine per day, 3 meals a day – for life.
She washed ashore
He had searched on his phone “ocean tides” (or waves)
He was probably an undercover gay
They expect us to “mommy them”
Men are monsters. Guaranteed.
If they were really genius, they’d know how to make women happy and stop killing everything.
One person asked what women would do with men safely gone for 24 hours.
Most of them said walk without fear.
WALK
93% of all homicide committed against women are by men.
Since 1970 68% of all life has gone extinct.
Nihilist.
Under the gaze of secular science
(They think they’re geniuses)
They were conditioned to love prostitution and porn as children
The divorce rate is over 85%
They hate us
Math is stupid
I don’t want electricity
(Not at the expense of every woman’s mental health)
1 in 3 women experience assault from man (and it’s never just one man or experience)
1 in 5 men have an STD
They can give you cancer with their dick
Their cum can literally kill you
And you wanna legalize prostitution and already have in Nevada and online
Gonna spread them parasites everywhere
They don’t even test both parties in prostitution (John’s aren’t tested)
Massage parlors have prostitutes
I’m sick of fighting a war I can’t win
I once liked smoking weed and now I don’t and can’t quit (am actively trying)
Will definitely be experiencing mood swings, sweating, insomnia, for a good two weeks minimum (I’ve been researching)
Men get an entire tribe to help them quit
It seems those who were born into class are the only ones fairing well (mostly)
There’s like 30% single never married folk educated but left behind
But the crims get government bonds for their employers to hire them
They kill women and get ahead
I’m kinda pissed
I’d like to see less people deleting their blogs
Let me know where the new blogging community is going
WordPress pushed their product onto the academic platform – and students learn to blog through education (I wasn’t even allowed a phone in school or the military on job)
I wasn’t allowed a life growing up and I’m not allowed one now thanks to gentrification and narcissism
I’m exhausted
I know you’re struggling
To find your humanity
You’re a drowning man taking me down
You didn’t want to be a worker bee
Getting kicked out during winter while the Queen stays in the hive – that you likely made her
You mutilated her bond
She called crying
Now you can murder her by accident and get 4 years
And you have the audacity to ask me, “what’s the matter honey, you depressed” and then tell the person you’re speaking with via phone that I’m a “manhater”
Awe boo
I wanna cut yer dick off
You better start behaving on the road…
And please let God know I just want a tiny acre of land – to grow these seeds I’m hoarding
And please tell God I’d like to be less suicidal when I fuck things up
Also, despite all the very bad graphs and divorce rates, I still wanna husband.
A partnership.
I wanna do all the things with him.
Please get over your lifelong prostitute addiction.
I don’t know how to communicate with you over a cellphone, I come from a time before computers.
When you randomly send me dick picks online or phone, you disrespect yourself and my love for you
You never ask, you just do. I get so angry boo
I’m old fashioned and want to be surprised! In the real world!
And I want to date my husband – it’s biology and how she connects to him
It’s not about gifts, it’s about protection and nurturing
When dating for a minimum of three months no sex, it bonds and creates lifelong bongs. She’s able to imprint on him.
When I asked him would he want to date me when I’m better he replied, “I’m not competing”.
Which isn’t at all what I meant.
I never bonded or imprinted with any man at this point, and now I feel a lost cause.
A lost soul.
They want us to lose our faith.
I don’t believe in his God, if that helps anything.
Suicide is the 7th leading cause of death and I’ve been trying to self-terminate since in womb.
By kindergarten, I got in trouble on the playground for tying a piece of string around my neck
They banned me from people or going outdoors for two weeks
But the prisoners get an hour of sun a day you see…
There are more horror stories and scars on my body – proving I’m a coward
I’m more sad the lotion in the bottle gave me sunspots – some aren’t natural now
I’m tired of crying
Or looking in the mirror
I have to go now because tears
Fuck you
I’ve been trying so hard to be good and you getting bonds for being bad
Fuck you
(I can’t work yet but Bookmarked the page)
1. Hire me please. A. I have Veteran preference. B. I come with official referrals. C. You’ll get a 5k bond for hiring me. D. I smile but am disabled so may forget to cross the T or dot the I.
Them: you’re hired
Seriously tho, I’m overqualified for these Taco Bell jobs, but have been out of the market for medical reasons. I’m hoping that maybe one day I can find a job to fit my disability and I’ll be using the career source and library to help fix me up an updated resume – I’d love to jump the hiring lines with “I come with a 5k bond”
I still have hope for my future to not be homeless
I want plan B to not be a gun…
I’d also like to plan for my 50th (instead of dying at age 45 like my sister, I was nearly there)
I’m 44 today… 🙂
I mean currently (my birthday isn’t until August)
If you base it on THIS calendar
This whole timeline is off
In 2018, a big electrical storm hit New Smyrna Beach (give or two a year), in which I drove directly into it, all four windows down, elbow and arm outstretched, 80 miles an hour, the whole jeep lit up, some hot shit touched me, I screamed “fuck” and thought my life was over, while looking in my rearview and arm windows, seeing tons of bands of lightning outstretched on the pavement, I jumped into this timeline here
My arm burned for days and I blogged about not having any iodine
Kinda got touched by God
I smelled the rain prior and knew a storm was coming but opted to have my windows down
There was no rain, only lightning, the thunder was so loud
I got pushed off a 50 foot bridge once, I’m not sure how I’m even alive
I felt more human feeding that squirrel than I have in some time
I could feel my heart repairing
Somehow, feeding Squirrel connects me to my purpose
The way Squirrel looks at me
Gonna toss him/her some pistachio soon
Yesterday, pumpkin/sunflower/peanut treats.
The way he looked at me
I need husband
He will need to “date me” (not compete) in order to make the mechanics and functions of a man/woman work (AKA imprinting)
(I’m probably some sort of organic AI)
(Angel)
(Not the artificial fake shit)
They want you to believe computers have feelings so you feel less guilt when you fall in love with a robot and not a human)
Awe what’s the matter boo, lost yer soul?
-
Father,
There’s almost nothing left
My sister is dead
I’m bereft
Sick in the head
Near out of breath
Want money in the bulkhead
Compartments upon compartments
Secret dirty pockets
Here I sit
Here I remain
Losing grip
Can’t change the game
Mirror mirror on the wall
Reflecting curse
And where I fall
Fuck you all
Bonds come in many forms
Like my love
It comes in swarms
Electronic stormsInvestments
Feels like I’m restless
I’m vested
Better than arrested
I thought investment always meant high-risk / cutting at my wrist
If a paper bond is lost, stolen, destroyed or otherwise mutilated, a replacement electronic bond can be requested.
“MUTILATED”
The wife called aggravated
Divorce threatened
Says husband is hated!
New purchase
But it won’t help my purpose
I’m worthlessLate bloomer?
But don’t be discouraged
Blame the Boomer’s
Forced obsolescence
And second guesses
Year-long stresses
Everything depresses
Secular science / sleeping lion’s / full of compliance \
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
My nutritionist complains that spring water “has no calories” but I get cranky when it takes me 3 days and several stores later to find it
Florida and Texas have parasites in the water – and if we can’t wash our face with it – so it won’t get up yer nose – I checked – the ear canal is also a route – but then I would think the eye
Sylvia Plath LIED
I gotta start boiling my water to bathe
If your houseplants are dying, stop feeding them tap water. Pro tip.
I’m still 110 pounds – despite eating a shit ton of mostly vegetarian food – and not rebounding for a solid week.
Kept eating like a pig – nope can’t gain any weight
Getting back to rebounding tho – just been deep down wallowing and trying to fatten up
My heart is obsessed with rebounding tho – the carpet still hasn’t been replaced but it’s still March and time is awful slow
Also me: I’m running out of time
I don’t have an ounce of patience after wasting my 20s & 30s
I cry so much
-
You’re off chasing rainbows where the rain won’t shine
You’ll love in time
My hand is aging
Like hope is tied
Sun leans in raging
Petrified
My love,
In the universe, spheres aren’t really spheres
Innocuous
Joy reflect as fears
Lingering
Like how you disappear
You are gone –
So how are you here?
I’m not marriage material
I’m grounds for divorce
I’ll stick to my high horse
GARAGE SALE:
Please buy my things
I overspent
I’ll overprice it
It’s not magnificent
If it’s Made in China
I’ve gotten rid of it
The entire toolkit
Sent it back to orbit
Omitted
Ejected from the cockpit
Calling bullshit
Burn it in the pit
Claim counterfeit
Propaganda lightening skin hypocrite
Brown-nosing misfit
Yellow fever transmit
I’m sick of it
Weakened
Lost spirit
Gifts?
Forget it
Remorse?
Acquitted
I come without bond
Broken
Look inside
Heart ain’t copingLike leaping ledge
Just barely hoping
Your foot will land
With surface sloping
Opposition disappearing
Dangerous dictatorship
Communist country
I’m growing hungry
Purposeful spread the virus
I read in silence
The holes stop healing when you die
Like all feeling disappearing
After you cry
Dear Mother,
You are cold war.
And Father, your mentor.
Though coldness, speak no more.Father,
You are ice age
Swimming in the current
Of my full rage
Father, you are first plagueMother,
You are cold war.
A six foot hole I am searching for.
Like a backdoor.And father’s picture? An eyesore.
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Postscript: Mirrors hold negative energy and the creams I was using cause “spots or burns” and I cry so much seeing myself in the mirror that I’ve now moved all mirrors from my bedroom, intend to get rid of or cover the others, am not allowed to wash my face with tap or shower water, per official government guidelines, and the cream I was using to not weather in the sun, in fact, made me weather in the sun, and so bottles are being thrown out, mirrors destroyed, tears finding unholy ground. But I’m still collecting seeds from the seed library (I’m half-alive hoarding dreams).
I wasn’t scared, I was sick.
And I’m still fighting off the devil.
And the urge of mass murder and suicide.
Have you seen the amount in the news?
Also, The Great Replacement theory is real.
I fell deeper in hell.
Two banks have been shut down.
I’ve stopped disassociating (and looking in the mirror).
I’m superstitious and see demons everywhere.
I need him to contact me.
Never mind the blocks (for his own protection)
Brian Cox is a pedophile faggot and – in his very own words – called a 38 year old man “old”.
He loves a brilliant young mind
Men hate women or anything natural or God like and are obsessed with their own creations such as AI, lab made cats and dogs, and say women have done nothing to contribute to society and are only good for childbearing
According to current studies, most married men want love with a prostitute (gag) (throws up in mouth)
I literally daydream of leaping off a bridge and that ain’t right
Fuck everything
Fuck you
I’ll be back at the library collecting seeds cause it fits in with my goals and values
I’m drifting buddy
*cries*
America is collapsing
I’m not racist but simultaneously hate everyone (unless good)
(I’m barely good)
(Hate self)
Pro tip: mirrors cause negative self-image and hold negative energies. Get rid of them. Stop looking. Now go off and be a good witch.
Happy cursing
I’m casting one soon on so-in-so
A tiny box with a mirror and his name sealed with a burnt black candle buried in the swamp
Because he hasn’t died yet (MB)
I’m undoing the curse from birth on…
Hear, hear!
-
I’m wailing
Climbing walls
Jumping halls
Blackmailing
Tell God I’m sailing
Direct from hell to heaven
Breaking spells
Inhaling
Predicting lies prevailing
The Devil got me detailing
And if you’ve done it
I’m telling
Double dare you
I’m yellingCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Postscript: (beware)
I downloaded the JetPack cuz I’m tired of fighting the current.
But my bank pulled some shady shite today and I’m ready to bury my money.
Shit like where you can only use the app now to upload a check and automatically enrolling me into Bill Pay when I clicked on “learn more”.
The app was uninstalled but then you can’t use the check deposits feature or check your check deposits via the website (I’m tired of being forced to use an app or automatically signed up for things just for learning more)
But buried cash doesn’t earn interest
But I don’t trust the banks
Now would be a good time to drop recommendations on where to stash your cash (like a checking and savings)
I looked up the top ten worst banks – I mean the Federal reserve just took down a bank.
It’s hard to get a handle on my paranoia these days – and it don’t help when folks are always calling the cops on you.
Does someone want to gift me a paper bond? I need one for my 50th.
I suddenly have goals to live to see my 50th – and enjoy it – with a big lump sum of cash.
And so I’ve prayed to God, “I’m saving for my future. My 50th.”
I probably only have a few seconds left but I’m bargaining.
I cry and ache so much.
But maybe, if I am alive, in say, 6 ish years, I could celebrate.
Anyhoo, I’m already invested into that plan – I started this very month.
Even nearly dead, I’m planning for my future
(I hope it involves my own yard to plant these seeds I’ve started hoarding)
And then this happened… and now I’ve lost all hope
The Chinese must have got ahold
It’s a gamble saving for your future when you’re already dead
I can’t believe I got this fucking death jab – I hate the medical system with everything I have
Banks are collapsing
Governments are beyond corrupt
Have you seen the amount of murder/suicide lately?
They say we can’t wash our face with tap water anymore.
And I was stupidly here and there snorting tap water up my sinuses like a dummy – after blowing my nose or something – putting a drop on my finger – I ain’t the brightest crayon in the box
But a man in Florida recently died from a brain eating amoeba doing a tap water sinus rinse
They say drinking the water is fine – but don’t shower with your face in the water, don’t wash your face with tap water but drinking it is just fine
And I had just washed my face in the shower – with the tap getting all over – mouth closed – cuz earlier reports said stop showering with your mouth open
But a kid died from a splash park
And now – a man – rinsing his nose with water
DEAD
So stop washing your face with tap water (per official guidelines)
I guess we gotta start boiling the water before we bathe
At this point, I’m afraid to brush my tooth
I had a splash of shower water get in my nose – had a headache all night – panicked – said this is it
I ain’t dying in a hospital
Only 4 folks survived a brain eating parasite – and that kid that died at the splash park – well the employees were quietly quitting and not cleaning the water properly or documenting it
None of these official employees or states or governments ever get in trouble for the shit they do
Like that mass murder suicide in 2018 with the lesbian couple and 6 blm kids – the youngest jumped from a 2 story building and begged the neighbor not to go back
She should have ran far away (bless her heart, she tried so hard) (the state stood by and let her get murdered) (all of them)
Drove off a cliff
No escape
Locked in…
State murder lots of folk scotch free
Apparently, those who play by the rules are the mark
I’m coming to terms with that
I hate all these “new changes” as if it’s in our favor, benefiting us
It’s not
I made coconut cake
It’s a meal and a treat in one
Flax, and oats, and pumpkin seeds
Eggs, coconut milk, coconut flakes
Topped it with lots of oats and seeds as well (not just in the mix)
Anyhoo
The world is ending but I made cake
Slice?
Seriously, do not wash your face with tap water…
(At this point living near an active volcano may be safer than living with this government)
(Some crushed pineapple in the batter would have made this cake divine)
-
Silver and copper My favorite topper Wounds and blood and pauper Jumping cracks like leafhopper Blackened skin maybe monster Bridges burning over water Flying high helicopter He never loved her
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
-
I regret crawling into that cave
Claw marks where I engrave
Rage like a heatwave
Headlamp won’t light the way
I rest here todayCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I don’t want wifi anymo
It’s got to go
More seeds for the dream yard
They are non GMO so I don’t have to burn them
Also scored a free book (limited supply) from the library
Unfortunately, despite NASA being a great joke, The Martian is still a favorite film (minus the gay hollywood music)
I don’t know what I’m allowed to have in life, or keep
Like why am I hoarding seeds and dreams?
And can things grow at Yellowstone? (Pro)
Will I accidentally boil myself in a hotspring? (Con)
Land near Yellowstone is cheap (pro)
But it’s also near a volcano (con) (unless maybe you’re suicidal!?!) (tbd)
Cheap land comes at a cost huh
So does visiting your old url
Fuck you
-
The moon gives me tilt
Seasonal travesty
Without any guilt
Go stand on her
I will give you lipCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I should be sleeping. I’m not.
You got plans to go back to the moon in a decade huh. Gonna take ten years to manipulate the data/crowd.
Besides, April 2029 / the final time
Apophis is probably just an atom bomb
We probably bombed the moon
We probably bombed Mars
They can’t stop bombing earth
I’m probably closer to the truth than you are to standing on the moon
NASA is a scam
Stop taxing me
I can’t wait for the space shuttle to crash into our beautiful ocean – destroying sealife
It isn’t “in space” it’s “free falling earth’s gravity”
Fuck you
-
A purchase has been scheduled / directed by the devil / but nothing I can’t handle
The United States / a nation of immigrants / minus the Native’s they enslaved to get it
Dear Father
Please respond
It’s a matter of death
I’m overcomeBut I’ll push the latter
While falling off the ladder
Which one will matter
I’m growing madder
From seconds to 40k / I want my own driveway
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Seed collection Seed collection
Pretty seeds I’m saving more than copper and silver, fuck you.
Tell God I’d like some place far from here to grow them.
This is hell. I wanna plant these babies somewhere else.
Even tho, they could be grown in the windowsill.
This.Is.Hell.
Help.
I hate how expensive it is to do anything. I hate the boomers.
There are things I don’t hate.
Seeds. Sunshine. Shade. Spring water. Nuts. Squirrel. Pretty bird. Crow.
I once liked having a job too. I’m considering remote work.
I’ve lost my mind but still have a Bachelor degree. Whatever that means.
I hope remote work.
Otherwise engaging at a sit down job at Aldi sounds potential.
“You plan on tossing him on the grill”
“Yum”
I’m sick of chasing my tail inside the deathcare health system
I ain’t better yet
But I’m sick of sitting around waiting to die
Working the movie ticket booth sounds ideal – weekends and weird hours no one wants.
Also me: I can’t fucking breathe
But I got my 20 minute rebound session in – getting fit with gravity
The rent is paid. They are dicking me around about my carpet “more time”
M’kay but calling the Health Department soon and whoever else I gotta…
I gotta download another app to do anything huh
Jetpack? A filter ontop a filter ontop a filter
Please no more
I don’t want to grow my seeds here
I don’t want to live here
I don’t want to die here
I’m sick of being sick
All woe
is meBut I had a multigrain bagel with cream cheese and avocado for brunch (groceries from home) with hot chocolate and some sort of milk with probiotics but no lactose and yum
I am trying to get fat
109 pounds currently
(Steel abs, peachy peach)
(Looking zombie in the face)
(Need him)
Land near Yellowstone is cheap (pro)
But it’s near a volcano (con)
Flip a coin?
I do like my investor inbox, FYI
I want my own business cleaning shit no one else wants to do
“Phew that was rough but we got 3 bags done”
“High five”
Like I wanna help people who are nearly dead and dying – not die
I need purpose
Which isn’t working 3 jobs to pay the electric rent insurance
There’s verifiable proof immigration makes the rental and housing market increase
I’m not getting anything out of being alive
When every dime goes to keeping afloat
-
I had to make order of the chaos
By getting rid of it
Crying lots and a little bit
Putting dying on hiatus
Changing energy from stasis
Burning bridges and first basis
I’m the best at tastelessCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I know you’re out there.
I knowyou still love me.The furniture was removed for free yesterday.
I was grateful and humiliated at the same time.
I wish I had offered him more than a protein treat for reward.
He took the treat.
I wish he would have taken my humiliation with him out the door. But alas, it remains with me.
There is nothing here but broken dreams and damaged carpet.
I am but a shell.
Crawling back to theta mode
I hate it here
This manmade infected environment full of natural flavor and narcissism
I know you’re in love with a prostitute
Did you know the government makes money from prostitution and most porn is made in California and Nevada made prostitution legal and our doors are open to immigration 24/7 and there is a direct link to sex trafficking and prostitution
I get called a “manhater”
The place is empty of life or longing.
Dogs and cats are not native to the environment
Just wanna see earth win
White people should be on the endangered species list – check the census
Glad Black Lives Matter are the only one who matters
-
I’m struts and shocks / your heart tied in knots / his equinox / if I’m there or not \
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Postscript
He said I had some seconds left in my tires, I said, well, what does that mean?
He said, “they ain’t got any life left”
I said, well, how much is that gonna cost me?
(You know, everything)
They took good care of her, cleaned up my brakes – got off the rusty business. I’m uninstalling the step up bars next stop, getting the spark plugs and tires replaced.
Eventually, the shocks and struts.
Could I sell her for the pretty penny CarMax offered me? Sure. I could sell or trade her in for a “younger model”.
But it’s Valentines, we’ve been together since 10K miles, I’m not ghosting her or leaving her in this hellhole (please God, we want out)
You seen Thelma and Louise? We’re together til the end. Potentially.
Hopefully not such a dramatic ending but I daydream of it.
Fantasize about ending my life.
Don’t want her to be a casualty of war driving off a cliff
Apparently when you take your ride into the shop, if you say things like “she’s a good girl”, “she just hit 76k”, “she’s making squeaky noises”, – they will assign more value to your ride, as my technician was still tweaking her, even after he drove her around to the front, he was on the ground, tool in hand.
I said, “can we get rid of that thang” and honestly, it wasn’t even installed correctly (so Pep Boys will be removing my step-up underbar next visit, no charge).
Struts are likely third in line for install – but poem written anyway.
I was like “can the rust be cleaned next visit” not realizing he already took care of that – as they were spic and span heading to the car (it’s an SUV)
Maybe, today instead of coming to work, and hating your job, you appreciate and value it instead, happy customer means more business – and not because you did something shady – but now you can relax knowing hooker income is incoming
Simply for doing your job and being proactive
He went above and beyond – or did his job – to the BEST of his ability – instead of quietly quitting
But there was no tip jar
There was no option to tip
I hope to hell God let’s me escape here
It’s good to have goals in hell
Some of the savings was depleted but that’s what the savings is for…
Right?
That’s why there’s 4 different saving pots to pull from.
I’ve decided I’m heading to GameStop to sell the ps4. Whatever the offer is – give it fucking to me.
I gotta replenish the gold at the end of the rainbow
I ain’t even got a TV
And even when I did, the sucker stayed turned off six months
That fucking propaganda box cost me everything
I haven’t renewed my lease so
Turned in all my library books – not wasting any more miles driving to that gorgeous dump
The sun was burning me through the window and I was asking/praying was I “doing the right thing”
“Should I be here, replacing my drive train belt”
I feel like I gotta escape a black hole…
Tires and spark plugs next
If God will may…
Make way for the Great Escape
To where?
A fucking homeless shelter cuz have you seen the price of lodging these days!?!?
$2k per month for extended stay
Or $2k for an acre of land and free sunshine
Fuck you
-
I could eat contempt / wrap it with lament / file it tax exempt / yell “god damnit” / my brain will forget / I haven’t cared yet \
Searching for you in typeface / underlines / and heartbreak / happiness is our stake / a gamble we should take \
A thousand miles from nowhere / I want to go there / ask God there’s hope where \
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
-
I wish he would bed me / take me down the aisle / then fucking wed me / I wanna get heavy / not fucking buried / I wanna get married
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Eating on the floor with you. LIFE. -
This comment is hate filled / a sinkhole / for you to build.
There’s likely bloodstains in the carpet / bloodstreams of my target / am I the carcass?
He shot her in her wedding dress / but love her / he’d never confess.
Father / they’ve all chosen sin / and I’m sinking / in quicksand.
Hey Sun,
How did you rise?
With light in eyes?
Is there time to shine?Hey Sun,
Am I alright?
The peerless moonlight
Will we unite?(Love you forever)
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Postscript
*do something / act abnormal to run your blog readers off*
*insert insanity here*
*program successfully installed*
I got John hanging in front of me, and dear Edgar in my rearview, in a puff of smoke, just loving the 10k hand I have drawn.
Werd.
I could use a real hand getting the apartment prepped to be stripped of this danky old carpet, and replaced with some fresh skin (lighter color too)
Don’t even know if I’m staying
LAUGHS
Immortally insane
Running through my vein
Edgar wants me to pick up a typewriter and get off this broken iPhone
I knew the phone was subject to break – but alas – even with these cursive powers – I did nothing to stop its fall
Oh shittte, it broke more than I thought
BABE
Fuck Apple, it’s a 6, I’m done selling shit – and jump off a bridge
But there’s poisoned sweet potato pie in the fridge
There is indeed, God bless, we’re gonna learn to make a healthy pie, but for now, poisoned pie for Valentine
*squee
Postnote: I ignored all the ingredients when I saw the price marked down to $2.50 with a date of 2/15. Said, “you’re coming with me”
But for real tho, don’t buy the pie
(It’s poisonous)
(You die, I die – but we’re not together, Romeo)
P.S.S.S?? Been rebounding my ass off (the rebounder fitness – resistance training – getting fit with gravity – weeee)
I’m two scenes on repeat currently – in my favorite film – Made in Heaven (1987?)
The one where he’s tossing his drink in the mirror / laying in the road screaming to God / Emmet “as himself” AND
Her, crying in public on the street – she got arrested too – dark days ahead
Welp.
GOD: if you don’t find each other, you’ll both be miserable
God: there’s no guarantee you’ll come back
Me: YOU TOOK MY LIFE
The roses are dying / cuz I’m done trying / the crow is black / his heart tarmac
*insert another copyright here*
I wore a t-shirt to the medical clinic once – with Poe on it – and the technician asked if it was Hitler
Millennial or GENZ
I sighed and said “Poe”
“Kind of a popular stash then tho, huh…”
“Hitler”
*makes awkward attempt to continue on with life wearing such an offensible shirt*
(Wonders if others mistake Him for Hitler too)
*creepily laughs
These motherfuckers are in charge
*nearly chokes on the air
*tries not to die*
And in a more recent attempt at “getting out and socializing”
I ordered food – through a drive thru
It wasn’t busy – I had time to count my cash – fuck the elite – you wanna be a cashless society and track me huh – fuck you – cash everywhere or boycott
Him (another Millennial/GenZ): why did you give me so much money!?!? *looks at me stumped like I’m stupid
Me: what do you mean!?!? *looks confused / haz brain injury / why am I so stoopidd
…well, I, gave you MORE to get the big bills back…
Him: *clearly confused – counts the money – proceeds to hand me a ten back, a five, and some silver.
So apparently I’m not stupid. Just pre- computer age.
I once had to work at registers where you needed to know basic math – to count change back
Remember when they upgraded the register to tell you the change back
MY GOD they made us beg and groggle for those jobs!!!!!!
“Don’t discuss your income in the workplace”
FUCK YOU
I mean, Happy Valentine
Burn in hell
*insert shitty photo of me here
I don’t want to see myself in the mirror – or on my blog currently – tho I haz space now
I wants new blog
*stomps feet*
I wants better home
*if I buy the land / will you buy the home?
Tell me, I need to know!!!!
A rose garden / an iron fence / him dressed in darkness / at my defense / our first kiss / give me this
-
I have gluten free parts / unless you count my farts.
I run my visitors off / like a cap I’m twisting off / Kiss them with scoff /but first to read their blog.
Sweet kiss of oblivion – heart like obsidian.
I gave him my love / still he / tossed it in the mire / made me walk on fire / like I’m some liar.
Why would he love a dead red sea / is that what I’m becoming / is there good in me?
Left behind
But forced to go on
Through the grime
Delete my life
Rearrange the pie
Crunch time
He’s interested in the context
Not the poetry but my point next
He gets into the prospect
What makes me sad
What I detest
He’s like a mirror what I reflect
I woke up with money, and I mean a lot;
Unless you think ten grand is not.
In the far recesses of your heart, moving forward and backward feel the same
If you’re gonna reset the deck
Don’t write the check
Force your hand instead
Erase the bet
Need savings to your neck
Montana
Mountains
Call of the wild
Throw a dart
I’ll drive there
God recalled
Every little sin
One of God’s flaws
Find me in the attic
Uncovering mirrors
Acting erratic
Unlike the flickers
They seem more static
Visions are clearer
I’m usually not wrong with my calculations unless it’s math
Then I have to ask
I don’t know what hate is / I’m only torn by love
Heads up: A lender reported that the status of your account is now current. Drifting but determined. Maybe we’re learning. But watch for what is coming…
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
FOR THE RECORD: I hate my online etiquette but I’m at odds to change it.
It’s me not you…
P.S. I’ve yelled at my body to “grow up” so much in the mirror but alas I’m this tiny fucking thang.
No man has ever made me feel like a woman either.
So fuck you.
But please stay.
I wish he’d remove my clothing – instead of my wings.
-
Separated by billions of light-years / this love
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
I’m using line breaks now. Am I a better poet?
I do crave the sound and clack and annoyance of an old typewriter.
I’m not going to put a filter on my poetry like Boeing put one on to tell the plane it can fly
Up down, up down, up down 18 times before it took a nosedive into the deep blue sea
The President: “you’ll need to rebrand”
GMO: “we’re Bioengineered Ingredients now”
The FDA: “we don’t want to tell you what’s on the labels” / NATURAL FLAVOR in EVERYTHING
(It was mad in a lab)
And now companies act like Coca Cola using “secret formulas”
It says it’s good for me so it must be true
(They’ll believe anything)
STOP TOUCHING ME AT CHURCH SPEAKING IN TONGUE
The sounds of my ribs breaking across the ocean as I leap from a bridge / has got to be better than the noises my BLACK LIVES MATTER neighbors love to make
Marriage / or go Hulk / take out the city block
Okay, I get the idea / but isn’t my context good enough
Did you know an acre cost about $2k grand?
If I started the paperwork, I could buy around 7 acres
tomorrowI’m only begging God for 1-5
Did you know I’ve already started collecting seeds?
Special seeds. For
ourgarden.EVE needs THE GARDEN
I dreamed the birds came to me
Fuck you.
Go enjoy your prostitutes
I should never be included in “a list” (top or not)
I already fell for you / asshole.
You destroyed my wings
You stripped me! Without consent!
If you don’t give me my mini garden the world will end
I know it’s what you what
Nihilist
And I’m gonna be crawling for John Jones / you better get over it
The world doesn’t revolve around YOU
Others need my special love – my light / it’s fading
My signal soon gone
My last will and testament is to die in peace
Man is only concerned with AI and “man’s best friend” and his own inventions
Destroying the world White lives & Native American first – well there’s been other resets
6th mass extinction currently – all with malicious intent “we create our own reality” / we destroyed Mars
Now we’re off to “save it” only we can’t leave earth
Van Allan Belt
NASA says “they made worse”
I need to
train for cold weathergrow some thangs
I’d rather gut myself with my bayonet / than to let him see me in real time / at my worse
( no filter in the real world) “weathered” (one of them that shouldn’t be in the sun / fuck you)Tell him / I need more time
(God too please)
-
He’s like a long-winded walk
Under midnight sun
And though he’s likely not you
He’s to blame for all you’ve doneCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
*insert clever line breaks here*
-
Did you ever think God needs you here to keep this place from going under
You’re light and thunder
Relax your plunder
I need you longer
To wake from slumber
Realize the hungerCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal.
Postscript
I write for God now.
Could you please let God know I’m exhausted and need to rest a bit longer.
These demons have not stopped pounding me since I was born.
My dreams consist of multiple murder and full vape pens.
The mind normally gets what the mind wants
The face may show sadness, the eyes show rage
“The scientists” say that once bees are dead – all life will vanish
“The scientists” have fucked around with the genetic coding of honey bees, which has resulted in a 50% life reduction drop.
The honeybees only live 50% of the life God had intended for them – now that the “scientists” have reduced their genes to half life.
They thought the bees would be “more productive”. Pay attention
These demons are killing EVERYTHING
I do not fear imprisonment, my heart would self-annihilate or I’d ensure humane ending via a cop ending my life prematurely
Keep swinging your dick on the road like you have more importance than
everyonewomenTell me something is wrong with me again
I’ll respond: what’s the matter honey? You in-love with a prostitute?
Yes. We know you all are.
The studies say over 50% of men want love with a prostitute and would legalize prostitution
There’s also a direct link to sex trafficking and prostitution – with testimony from men, “she looked trafficked and frightened and underage but it’s what I want”
Fuck you
Cut me off again, anywhere, anyday
You only treat prostitutes with respect huh
Like this book “racing the light” that I checked out from the library just yesterday – nowhere in the synopsis did I know porn would be the subject.
So far, the writer has used his characters to complain about the daily women, one being a “skinny scarecrow”, the other being “fat” – yet glorifying the porn star on the poster, how she looks amazing wearing “all black”. How they wouldn’t fuck her during a podcast show because they have boundaries
GET IN THE FUCKING SEA
I’m done reading!
Chapter 7! He’s on his way to meet the famous pornstar!
Gag me! I’d rather die than live in this porn infested society!
Stop conditioning!
This book should not be at the library!
Walmart and the mall should not be selling sex equipment in front of children or me!!!!!!!!!
FUCK YOU
Tell God I’m angry!!!!!!!
The honeybees deserve more!
Science is unethical!
Art is sin!
90% of all murder happen by men!!!!!!!!!
The other ten percent I’m contemplating falling in!
So many men are committing crimes they are reducing sentences – opposite for women – hardly any do so punishment is more severe
Rules for thee, not for me
I’m gonna fuck you up if you smile at me incorrectly or refuse to open the door when you see me
Cut me off again
I triple dare you
Money don’t mean shit to me
Ending your pathetic society tho – like Bonnie
and ClydeI dream of it
DAYDREAMS
Of bloodletting
With the de-lite
BLACK LIVES MATTER/ ASIAN HATE ✓All before morning coffee
Born this way
Need him to go where I’m going
The library is no longer a safe place for me – I’m angry and contending with that now
I sensed this with the LGBT and Boomer staff lurking and the “smell of lies” and the street political thugs in gold begging for my signature
Still there was hope
Briefly
It didn’t last very long
People ruin everything
I’m finely crafting my monster and angelic side –
Men have suppressed me from sex and defense
They get sex and murder – with the slap of a hand
Cut me off again
I can’t be the only woman feeling this way
Gonna start a riot
The way doctor lady swallowed when I told her “according to the latest studies over 51% want love with a prostitute and would vote yes”
Gutted her right there in her stool
Continued gutting her with more facts
I’m maybe the Oracle but get treated like Agent Smith
I’m maybe Neo Trinity Morpheus too
“Why me Gabriel” (you’re going to hell for the life you took – you’re fucked)
Should I join the order of Satanism? I was reading over their website – I read the DR book age 16 – it cost money to join – they say titles are earned – whatev, give me Priestess or fuck off – I will keep my $$$
Also, should I join? The order?
Of Satanism?
Revenge is a dish served by an Angel rogue in hell
It’s just another form of narcissism carefully crafted
“We’re not religious but we are, we think we’re Gods”
LAUGHS
Oh yeah?
So adorable
I really enjoy spending time in the sun getting “weathered” and feeding all God’s creatures
Probably causing them more harm but the intention is good
Tell God I’m sorry for being such a fuck up
I know I’m suffering cuz I died via suicide – this hell
But when do I?
I’ve been conditioning myself to do it since in womb
Age 5 on the kindergarten – got in trouble for putting “string around my neck and pulling” – wasn’t allowed sunshine or going outdoors for weeks (fuck you)
You treat prisoners better than civilians
I’ve got scars from cutting on my body
Charming
I worry more about my stretch marks than I do scars over my big veins
LOOK: TRIED TO KILL MYSELF THAT DAY
Wanna get married?
*jumps from bridge
-
I should move the place you most hate; get a little cabin by the lake.
Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved.
-
Am I sleeping beauty?
Put under spell?
Are you creeping monster?
Or savior in this hell?Am I just gloomy?
Cheerful carrousel?
Are we fast moving?
Or racing parallel?Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved. No portion of this website, including text, photos, and videos, may be reproduced, copied, saved, transferred, or transmitted in any manner, digital or otherwise, without written permission.
Mary go round – the truck – like a vulture – ready to devour the dead
Welp ^^ ^^
*bat wings
-
The light moves
Through dark and greys
The way it soothes
When heart would stray
It won’t lose wayCopyright © 2023 PoeEternal. All rights reserved. No portion of this website, including text, photos, and videos, may be reproduced, copied, saved, transferred, or transmitted in any manner, digital or otherwise, without written permission.
Postscript
I think the sun is likely female
Light is information
Your heart, brain, your nerves electrical
Little light-beings
Not your fleshlight
“I’m sorry Cooper, you had a gift and you didn’t get to use it”
If only my parents would acknowledge their mistakes with their children
The father must be wondering if he’s sending his sister out into the great unknown to see if “I am happy”, in which, “I am not” and I’m stalking my father to see if his address is on the sex registry, where I learned a list “is not forever” – in fact, many states are reducing the length of time a name should be on
My own flesh was surprised to just learn that the list “is not forever”
The list should be one list and forever
Maybe I should go pay the ole father a visit
Will be hard to look upon him without spitting or disgust
Can barely write this now without snarling
The Boomers sold America out
Need land. Want to grow things.
Been disassociating. Have money. Lots.
LAUGHS
I swear to fuck, Edgar just said, “this one’s on me”
He doesn’t want me dying in the street
Been there, done that mentality
I need a lock of his hair and Jone’s skull
Thinking of buying land out in Montana
I’m gonna get him outta that fucking hole
People do it… I’ve read
Years later. A recovery after the government said no.
They were later blessed.
They just went in and did it, danger and all.
Some die trying. Bless.
But many mostly succeed. Determined.
He wants out. It was his final wish. His last will and testament.
Management thought a death would bring in more $$$$. He was disappointed it closed. Surprised. I read his own fucking lines.
I wanna rip his fucking cock out with my teeth
Maybe I should write a story – fictional – and focus on buying land in Montana instead
The desert is probably a terrible place to grow things
Are there trees in Montana? Is there sunshine and a sun? What sort of food can I grow? What are the taxes like? What are restrictions like? Can I have a chicken coop?
Not to slaughter but I’ll steal the eggs – with gratitude and love
I don’t know how to take care of a plant, let alone a chicken…
I could dig a foxhole and protect them tho…
I don’t want to kill the fox tho
The fox is hungry
He will probably be getting fed..
All of God’s creatures can come to me for food
If God will allow me to provide for them
I want to be called Willow, or my land
“Willow acres” or something
1-5 acres is all I am asking for
I have a COE
Please ask God to protect me from my crazy behavior, I’m spinning wild
Should I buy land in Florida? I don’t wanna now – it’s gone – immigration ruined it 😦
*sadface*
The sinkholes, the limestone
Can’t even take a bath after knowing what recently happened to that one brother “in his bed”
What the fuck was he looking at tho? For real? The earth got mad!
Sorry don’t meant to victim blame
Terrible terrible way to go
Sinkholes are to be feared
And most Floridians fear them more than the gators…
Please stop using the animals as entertainment and selling their teeth
I still have mine – and cry
Poor baby gators
Getting their teeth knocked out for a few bucks
God made me so depressed
*sigh*
I always hated investing but now I’m trying to study and learn and just keep going over it until something finally sticks
The ah ha moment
All my research says stay away from the stock market if you don’t want your savings to plummet
I’ve had mine in investment funds for years – growing – ungrowing – I fear to peer
I didn’t know I had any at all
I thought I had lost it all
I have my down payment for my land or home – and I can borrow against it or remove it all (with a penalty)
Or keep investing (with minimal to high risk)
Are banks even interested in a $15k down payment? Does money still talk?
I’m talking 1-5 acres
Is cash still king?
Or do I gotta take in a gift card and doughnuts?
Shouldn’t they be feeding me? To get the sale?
The Army and Marines took me to lunch – more than once – the Marines heartbroken when I chose Army green
Oh boo, my uniforms are obsolete
And I’m so fucking small – I get lost in them now..
Can’t even sell the new ones – even old – cuz they changed uniforms again!!! Immigration is a Trojan horse!
Me and the old vets complain about how these kids don’t leave a building to fight…
They’re planning something sinister
Is Montana a good place to move? About to throw a dart…
-
This place is set to sink
The message on the soap bar reads
E
S
C
A
P
E
The ghost in the mirror says the same
Snuff out the circus
From steering wheel
One hand will surface
No face but purpose
Maybe John didn’t pray hard enough
He didn’t crawl hard enough
He didn’t bawl long enough
Maybe John had given up…
I’m taking out the trash –
The neighbors “entertainment” blaring from the car window is worse than what’s in the bag
Children are heroin to a pedophile
You shouldn’t leave ANY MAN alone with a child (public counts)
They do it in a crowd
Avoid the stock market
Unless you want –
Your savings to plummet
The way that monster extended his hand for me to walk
The trust it took to cross
He stands in the doorway
Dressed as darkness
As death
Thick as a highwayHe rides
Like chance is his market
In a blacked out Chevy
Crying my name
I read through the fine print
You must’ve gaslit
Or put an asterisk*
Chill out babe
People need to eat
They should be chasing me
Like a current
But the crickets are chirping
And nobody knows it
Green yellow red
Tartan
His favorite, he said
Final curtain call
Last watch before the fall
He treated her with little worth
Even when she showed him mirth
On a broken earth
Going out on top, in the middle, or none
It’s all the same sum
He said he needed her
She prepared for the apocalypse
The lies eclipsed between his lips
Lunar light from fingertips
You wanted –
You were denied
Like spear in side
Not dignified –
Hope you like the ride
Today I asked myself, “are you okay?”
But the reply was, “I’m not sure…”(Tell God I’m lost)
Kidnapping season has arrived
Better hide so I don’t die
I fell so far down the rabbit hole
I nearly lost my soul
The Devil greeted
Said I looked mistreated
Gave money then pleaded
“I’m welcome when needed”
(True stories from the pawn)
🙂
We wipe every trace
Of any mistake
They tremble when I enter room
Eyes spell doom
Searching soon
But for who?
“Are you feeling suicidal or homicidal today”
MY LABS ARE FINE
You lie, I lie. Eye for an eye.
Professionally paranoid
Not me, another boy
At least one is getting paid for
“Life jackets worn
Nobody mourns”
But my vein pours
I’m the Queen of Thorns
Some of these poems deserve their own little graveyard.
Queen of Thorns – Merrie Magdalene – maybe God wants me with no man
I missed his cues. Trembling in my blues. Set a trap or two.
Does he know how hard it was
The darkness
He wanted to turn me into haunted
Thanks for cutting the cord on us
You were really dangerous
He’s unstable
Like a megabomb unlabeled
He cut the cable
He’s so ungrateful
But gave me the label!
He pulled the plug
Couldn’t handle my love
Thinks he’s so smug
But I laid the bug
Lesson comes from above!Sucker!
GENX – the absolute favorite
“FAIRLY YOUNG – not 400 pounds” (could he be anymore of a pedo tho) (asking for a friend)
(Sorry – autism is real – my thoughts have sound)
His hand is cruel
But the trap I laid was too
There was never any other
The devotion was always him
Every single hour
I had given in
Money in the wallet
Money in the bank
Money sweet like chocolate
Money in the safe
The self-sabotage trap was set
It shone like gold
To a thief – made his tongue wet
He lost his foothold
Have I won the bet?
Did his black heart fold?
THE DEVIL STUDIES ME
What deed does this warrant?
Keep my soul stored in storageI NEED A FOREST
His hand is too stern
For an Angel
He should’ve waited his turn
He’s cutting lines in hell
“Not competing”
Even when I’m dreaming
Though I don’t know his face
Or where I’m leaning
You terrible fool.
She complained but then
He had her condemned
Didn’t like her dreaming
Couldn’t call her friend
This page no longer exists
You’re careless!
You’re not a king –
Your word doesn’t mean a thing!
Disgusting john
Gone first dawn
Dream was wrong
He’s a moron
Dreams and fantasy do not occur at the same interval
Dreams in mirror are closer than they appear
How to get rid of a ghost during a self-sabotage attack:
- [ ] Step 1 – tell him/her you dreamed of another
No child left behind
Except –
I’m in decline
Falling further in line
You need me so bad huh
Prostitutes are the only one to see your face (get dinner too)
“God isn’t here”, he implored!
But did I not give him everything he was asking for?
Endless love –
But still I gave him more.
No one can join, no one can leave
Thank you for releasing me
To the wildebeests
To the north and east
Do you love me least?
Despite all them hours given –
I didn’t earn enough to maintain my blog or equipment
Unlike the prostitutes you are paying – a decent living…
TO ALL – the shoe fits
“I’m not gonna make it”, she cried
“I know”, he yelled, as he cut the line…
(People never mention that he loved her from the moment she walked in the room and said “no you’re not” or that he killed that one guy closer in order to save her, or how the dad said he should be making babies and he next found her on a wild excursion – love is the anomaly sure sure)
Will she even be alive when he gets there, or will she too be crushed by a landslide – like how he cut the cord on her – to fall into a black hole – Murphy’s Law – gotta leave something behind
God gave him everything
Including an an angel with imperfections
The way other poets had written
She made him smitten
Left her in a ditch then
Rode away with his riches
Wondering if love’s where he’s wishing
The endless bitches…
Who gave him the right to punish her with such effect that her wings were stripped and her gift neglect?
He cut me loose
Didn’t know what he would lose
She was an angel in hell
Half-virgin
Overworked and overburdened
Though lesson not emerging
His hand reflecting serpent
Now heaven can’t be summoned
She fell down in a pit of despair
Called a timeout –
He responded, ‘fuck off farewell’
You foolish fool
Pride got best of you
He cut his only lifeline to heaven
Didn’t to count to seven
Three times I would be denied
Stayed by his bedside
Over mortified
Underpaid but hoping he was satisfied
Now contemplating suicide
He pulled the plug
While I was alive and breathing
Telling world what all was needing
To keep on being
Did you forget your heart or something?
Lying on the floor?
All I hear is banging –
Coming from my door.
You’re not anyone to build a foundation with –
Because you have money
I have a little bit
The fat sun hung its head lowly
The answer is still no
Keep knocking though
He doesn’t know if he made the right decision – and he’s right – he really didn’t.
The way hopelessness trickled like a wave
I watched him climb into our grave
Facing death I’m brave
All I can do is turn away
You don’t know what you’ve done
Immaculate fool
Trap set for one
And in you flew
He needed me daily
So I pulled away greatly
Especially what I learned lately
How they pay prostitutes for “dating”
The way you left
In uncertainty
Waving like a theft
But claiming clarity
The world ain’t paradise
He misreads my lines
We’re wrapped in knives
Covered twice in lies
Shared finances?
Forget about it –
More like failed romances,
Where I commit.
Hard cock but weak heart
He left me with nothing
Took the rainbow and the rope
I’m barely copingTook the boat
See him atop the waves floating
Going directions I ain’t going
Some days you gotta stay down
He had a speedboat
She had a canoe
He cut the cord
Near the waterfall, too
The Devil –
I didn’t know he was so easily triggered –
Who would have figured?
Excuse me,
I’m in the middle of self-sabotage,
Why are you requesting access?
What now honey?
You broke the truce
He fell into my trap
And that’s a wrap
Ask him why I left (he’s bereft)
Fuck! Why is he knocking?
Hasn’t he just left?
He hasn’t been far walking!
And now he’s got requests!
I shared special parts of me
I never shared with anyone
He took advantage of my generosity
Now he’s on the run
Our city is a barren waste
With heart like desolate rock
In a howling state
Give me the glock
I thought I could never live without “man’s best friend”
Until he turned demented
Hailed from a demon
A head that’s fed
I loved you
Any way possible
There wasn’t any doubt
A wide open ocean
There wasn’t any drought
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