I’m glad my spoken word made top 3 but the nasty “wtf” comments don’t help my stage fright 😑
I’m an introvert with severe stage fright.
I want to make more TikTok’s tho and I appreciate your views to my channel!
I’ve been writing a lot of poetry but I want to make more spoken word videos AND go live on TikTok for the very first time to read my poetry – since I’ve had a request on TikTok to do that, just this week!
Pushing through fears and listening to my audience!! 💪
(You can completely turn off commenting and other features if you don’t wanna deal with comments)
I’m going live on Twitch again soon too!! I’m going to be live-streaming more of the new Resident Evil chapter that came out on Dead By Daylight!
Fun stuff planned!
If you’d like to support my ongoing creativity, I’m on Patreon and OnlyFans!
Just like any other industry, we rely on memberships, subscriptions, and tips to get by!
Thanks for supporting independent content creators! 💪
I’ll just keep buying your book and when it arrives on Amazon I’ll fucking do a TikTok video of me ripping the pages apart and telling you how much I hate you and that can be my like my thing
you know ripping your fucking book to pieces
buying it tearing it apart never fucking reading it buying it tearing it apart on TikTok
Found my niche
Wasting my time and money on you
I’m going to make a full-time career of it on TikTok
You made a mockery of my house these bruises vivid Fleeing reason Like lying to the wind Consequences rigid Or maybe gods to blame my wings unfitted Now trapped beneath the cross I’m scorched and livid Did you ever stop to think Your words imprinted Whether I was meant to see Your light emitted Is forgiveness in the tree You were acquitted
Thank you for supporting my new free OnlyFans! I’ll be posting more content soon! Especially because I can no longer post a photo on my blog without paying the steepest price for it!
Got 4 new fans just today!!!!! 🍑🥰🍑
I’ll be livestreaming again this week on Twitch, possibly even this evening!
🥰 thanks for the good feedback on my latest bum post! I dropped more shots on both my OF campaigns! I’m still on bedrest and I don’t have the most fancy digs, but it’s home for now. Can’t share 1 photo on my blog tho, unless I pay for it. 🤨
He leaves me clues confessing They could be lies to keep me guessing There’s trouble around always pressing He’s pouring poison on the gauze I’m here dressing
When you are a warrior, but sustained a wound When they utter hero, but you have no tomb When they yell it’s summer, but you’re stuck in doom When you really need him, but don’t know what to do
When he says he’s full But comes back for seconds When he draws a plan But never changes his methods When he’s seen it all But it’s just nightly rejections When he’s looked beneath the stone But worships all imperfections
Can I be the soil under your roots? Or the vine that’s growing our sweetest fruits? Can I be the voice that settles disputes? Can I be the rug you toss your boots?
But, if contact is impossible because we live in different dimensions or realities, or because we don’t live in the here and now, could you just put me out of my misery?
Like a lame horse?
Because I literally don’t want to live for anything or anyone other than you.
To the world a punisher Made of iron, “the resister” But he needed more from her Maybe love as his governor He has the key to enter It would end all winter
I feel the motion Of time And you Flowing like an ocean
The air is toxic And care It just isn’t there
I’m slipping Detachment from feeling Or maybe why I’m reeling
I hear The words, the lines They’re still not appealing
The tears They just never end And written text He won’t ever send
I’ll make dying an art as he slipped the blade from earth’s heart 💔
The continents may be fractured but now they have a chance to part
Is the Great Filter in our rearview?
What if we are a chance encounter?
Are you an interstellar comet? Fixed beneath promise Drifting between done it?
Glowing pink hues Maybe it’s just vomit? 🤔 God’s sick of promise?
1900 miles from ordinary 1900 truths from where I’m cold and buried Underneath the shroud Burden is all we carried
I’d jab out my eye with this broken crystal ball
I’d rip across the flesh but I don’t have the gall
I’m moving over to my free OnlyFans because WordPress plans are extremely expensive, others like to steal from me, I’m tired of being penalized on social media for having a personality or for being cute, and I want some privacy to be myself.
I’ll likely use it to go live as well! 💪
I don’t exactly know how I’m going to use it but I’ll figure it out as I go along because I am an artist but I don’t fit into one category.
I don’t have one niche and I’m not a one trick pony nor do I want to be. 👀
All the content that has been reported and removed or demolished by the bots previously, I’m going to post on my free OnlyFans! Retribution! 👀
So content will get put up, some you may have seen before, because nowadays my art pops into and out of existence like atoms thanks to censorship!
I have a new website basically which is my free OnlyFans. I can post pictures there!! Can’t on my blog but I can there! Most are too sexy for social media even if I’m fully clothed. I don’t get the double standards but don’t think that the top accounts don’t pay Big Bro to stay there. And now if you want to be seen anywhere you have to promote yourself, either through the app you are using, or through your peer network, or both. Pay to be seen no matter how you dice it. So I’m going free and private. You can’t match my level of petty hoe. 👀
For adults but it’s free 👀
I may on occasion post PPV content since WordPress made that so hard to do here (and expensive).
Private club where I can act a baby and do what I want when I want!!!
Or, just be an artist since 1984 is now. 👀
Hit the subscribe! Free doesn’t mean boring! Maybe it means priceless! 🤨
I send him notes in private And even with the wind hailing All is quiet Dancing solemnly Outside a riot No normalcy Chaos our diet We sail the sea Like we’re compliant
Maybe I don’t want to see with eyes that bleed When all who stand before me fail to lead Maybe I will kneel to all I ever wanted In a field of lies, was truth a dream you ever really haunted?
Everything boils down to narcissism and gaslighting. And the game IS rigged so the rich stay rich and the poor stay poor. The rich get rich off of lies. Drop your traditional banks. Drop your credit cards.
Even if you attempt to live free, you still won’t be able to save a penny to get ahead.
Guess who is to blame? Go on. I fucking dare you to see the truth.
Are we like string theory, connected to everything? Cuz we’re not attached. Yet we are one? 🤔
But I don’t even know you. You don’t even know me. I can’t live without you. But you can. Or, am I the reason you come up for air? Can’t breathe in hell? 😑
Why am I fascinated in the shape that light can make? Is it equilibrium or a reflection of mistake? Is it heading towards chances I can never take? Is this really freedom or a cage I have to break?
It’s especially concerning because my bloodline is Native American and my grandmother had 12 children
Could you imagine if those same laws were imposed here and my grandmother didn’t have 12 children? That means my mom would’ve never been born and neither would I and maybe that would’ve been a slight fucking miracle because she didn’t want me at all but my grandmother taught me how to be a good person and how to cook and how to love and how to garden and she was basically my mama
The root of all evil actually starts from over there and I really want to build a fucking wall and make America the way it really should be – the land of the free – not the land of slavery so India can sit back and get rich and DO NOTHING but impose more rules to enslave you – End it says “23,000 Indian millionaires” have left their own country since 2014.
Yeah they come here and take all our jobs and never give us proper work breaks and increase our rent every fucking year for no reason other than to take our fucking paycheck
I don’t like where the world has headed.
I don’t want to play the money game
It would be nice if I made enough to cover my main cost of living like my rent but I barely get enough support to cover my website and operation domains
And I’m still called a Golddigger
Even though 99% of people around me want everything for free
I made another TikTok – with the intention of adding spoken word – I could not sort how to adjust the audio – so did not add my vocals to the NIN track – but I mean, if Trent Reznor is okay with it… 👀
I did however learn some more editing and filter tricks – for this mellow TikTok 🤪
Lately he’s been sweeping out the cobwebs The devil’s interested in the details He’s focused on the way my story unveils He claims I am the reason that the earth swells
See, this is why I already like the Twitch platform and I do plan to start using it more once I get my master bedroom set up the way I want and move my TV and my gaming system and everything back here
I’ve been getting hit on Instagram about my posts not being seen by other users because of my background music – so thank you Twitch for letting me understand what Big Bro has been doing to my account.
👇👇👇
Instagram has become a dreadful platform to use. Not only do I have to worry about my content being erroneously reported or having to fight the algorithm bots, but now I’m dealing with even more censorship because of the background music I chose to be playing when I’m dancing or working out.
Street teaming was once glorified and now you get in trouble for it literally!!!!
It’s nice to see though that Twitch is actually upset that Big Bro is messing with peoples accounts like that even though this isn’t Instagram or Facebook, it’s Twitch.
But it also means not every company or app is bowing down to Big Bro.
My new free OF is still pending – and I intend to start using Twitch to livestream more – even for the nights I’m gaming. I had Twitch set up with my computer in my home studio but when I did my poetry livestream, the audio was cutting in and out – but not during the performance, I could only hear the technical issues after. It wasn’t an issue with my mic.
I don’t really know what I’m doing and I have a brain injury so when something goes wrong I get stuck and I don’t have anybody to help me. 😏
Unless I am selling you a product on Instagram, Insta has made sure I become obsolete.
“We believe they used automatic tools to scan”
Yup!!! No god damn privacy! We’ve moved into an actual Hitler state and 1984 is now but you can go get a free donut at Krispy Kreme for just obeying!!!!
It’s hip, it’s cool to peer pressure somebody into doing something that they don’t want to do or to steal someone else’s ideas and copy them!!! Bullying is okay because it’ll become a TikTok that has gone viral!
It’s no wonder all the good people like me are going unhinged and taking all you motherfuckers out!
I hope to watch the next shootout with a livestream at the next one with my little fucking cheerleading outfit and a goddamn stick on a pole cheerin the motherfuckers
Woo hoo you got another!!!!
The entire morning shift!!!!
Go you!!!!
And look at you not even messing with the fucking law, you didn’t even care about the cops, you knew cops were gonna take you out, you were going to get as much of the motherfuckers that pissed you off on the morning shift!!!
You are now my effing hero!!!
I’m going to start sensationalizing the fucking gun shooters!!!
Woo hoo yee hawwwww!!!!
1984 is now and I’ve been ridiculed and silenced by the same system I fought to protect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you Twitch for having the little guy’s back!!!! I love you!!!!!!!
I get this kind of thinking too. It’s why religion is so important for the narcissist because they want to believe that they can be a monster and people will still forgive them and love them.
They want to be a monster but take no responsibility for it and blame it on “evil” or “aliens made me do it”. It’s easier to disassociate from yourself – take no responsibility for your terrible actions – and believe all those around you will forgive you – yet – you can’t even admit that you are the bad seed. Or, you know you are the bad seed, and it’s now your life mission to turn others into what you are. Vapid without remorse and soulless. But you all love to cum so much….. 👀
Asking for Americans and every single one of you who have experienced this more than you want to admit
👀
(Pay attention to the spammers trying to take your moneyzzzzz)
Leonardo DiCaprio hiding From the paparazzi who should be illegal since you can’t even post things online without your shit getting taken away. You shouldn’t be allowed to take pictures of somebody and then sell them. No no no
When you anti-Paparazzi, push for world peace, make movies entirely “green” (eco-friendly) and the NWO hate youuuuuuuu
I mean, the world is falling apart, but I still love you.
It’s ridic. Right? 🤔
God created this obsession FYI
And I actually know what a black hole feels like
I actually know what Sagittarius A* feels like
It’s possible that sometimes I am Sagittarius A*
When other girls are talking to you
👀
I mean I started taunting this other guy who is married and having babies because I thought he was you
👀
For months and months taunting this poor dude
And even liking the posts his wife would drop of the fam 👀
And I don’t have any hate towards his family or any animosity
Just that damn porn chick 👀
I hate her with a passion especially since she stole my signature booty move
You don’t get to steal my signature booty move and get the fucking attention of the loves of my life too and me not hate you
But, this poem above is about the other guy, the third guy, who I’ve convinced at certain times is you – but have also equally accepted that he is not
👀
But like I love this dude and the love has manifested to be real because he bought me pizza 👀
I love three guys who at one point I thought was only one – but for sure is not 👀
Three libras but it wasn’t so obvious 😑
But now I love all of you equally the same
😑
3 guys and I don’t get 1
*Starts chanting in some weird gibberish voice and just lets people know I’m talking to God so they don’t think I’m insane*
*goes insane*
😑
Uhm, so I haven’t lost all my ass or leg progress yet but I feel nowhere near like I’m ready to start fitness again and it’s really scary to be having these kind of heart problems at my age over a fucking vaccination.
If you’re still supporting me even though I am dying and venting on the daily, thank you.
I get called lazy for serving my country and I get called lazy for having an OnlyFans.
Jesus Christ left Mary Magdalene in charge of the gospel and they wiped her from the books and labeled her a whore.
Just like me!!!
They create poor conditions for you to live in and then condemn you for trying to survive.
They fucking condemn you if you try to die by suicide as well.
“No no no you’re not allowed to die like that, it’s a sin”!
Apparently it’s a sin if you lust after somebody else even though that is actually biology
And “a sin” if you try to die because you don’t want to live in this bullshit life
The only thing that is not a sin is giving them money
Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of your money
Thank you for making my new TikTok number one on my channel! I’m always afraid to even do one because the competition is so fierce! 👀
My TikTok clocks in just over 15 seconds but it has already been played over three hours!! 👀
It shows the average watch time as being longer than the actual TikTok (does this mean you were suspended and experienced time dilation)? 👀
683 accounts reached! Holyshit! I’d pee myself! I can’t perform in front of people. Hell, I can’t even type if someone is standing over me. If I am eating and I am into a guy and he sits down and starts talking to me, I will choke on my food. I iz nerd. 👀
I love making TikTok’s and I am trying to get better. I’d like to make more. But not 3 a day more. Those creators are just copying things that have already been done. And they have all the equipment they need that I don’t have. 👀
I have other videos too on my channel – I don’t have a set theme. But I do prefer using it more creatively than journalistically. Apparently you are supposed to respond to comments with more videos (even the negative comments). Eh, no thanks.
Thanks for checking out my work and for supporting content creators!
I’m sorry there has been less content lately, I am still recovering from heart related issues but the passion is still in every thing I do (including the rants). 👀
I played everything how I was supposed to
I did everything I was supposed to in society and look where it fucking got me 👀
I have a college degree but the recession has gone on longer than the Great Depression did, and I remember specific conversations my grandmother told me about living through that experience.
So if you’re out there supporting me financially, I appreciate you even more.
Dying (maybe) but not giving up or quitting.
And I’ve been writing like mad, and am working on a draft for my Patreon rewards for the month of May!!! Y’all have stuck with me and I appreciate you so much! Your support paid my domain operating fees this month too and I am grateful ! Thank you!!
Writing has always been my dream and my passion, this is what I’ve always wanted to do! Along with guitar, music, and acting but my stage fright has proved challenging over the years (and my brain injury).
I do have a few public post on my Patreon and you can follow for free and get those free rewards when I post public content! I drop poems from time to time (poetry that hasn’t been posted anywhere else).
My lowest tier is $1 if you’d like to support my ongoing creativity while earning perks and rewards! 💝
It keeps this blog up and going, the content coming, as well as advertisement free! Zero spam ever on my blog! No ads! So you can read and watch my content with a virus looming. 👀
I started my campaign in 2020 and grateful for my patrons!!! 💖
I really appreciate that you let me focus on my art instead of being a socialite (I’ve never been one of those).
I don’t actually do good around people.
And I’ve always been very intuitive and to know things before they happen.
“But what’s really going to boggle your noodle later is would you have even broken it if I hadn’t of said anything“ 👀
And that my friends is the only answer I need to know in life.
