Underneath the stones of regret peace is found
Though the tether is outstretched it is still bound
The weather grew punishing and so too his frown
But my love for him keeps circling around

And I try my hardest to stand
But this depression keeps showing its ugly hand
And I’m trying to fly but in his heart I just crash-land
And it breaks my heart I did it again

So with my broken will I isolate the curse
But without him I am ever growing worse
And if I could I would put time in reverse
Love would be the only tether we would traverse

I pushed away the only thing that ever mattered
And when he left my soul completely shattered
And now there’s nothing, not even a word
And his silence is the loudest sound I have ever heard

© Delia Ross. 2019

---

I never wanted to…

Her skin is pale in the early evening
hanging upside down
from the foot of an unmade bed
feeling weightless
watching the world beyond the window
where Autumn rain falls upward
and lights divide

No appetite in this dark room
no appetite for days
friends all kept at bay
no rubber masks, only patches of ice
no fireworks, just fallen leaves collecting
passing headlights flood the room
then scan across the ceiling

Blood is pounding in her ears
‘I’m losing weight’ she thinks
As puddles form in the street outside
the shops all wear their shutters down
She reaches up, closes her eyes
pushes two thumbs into the carpet
and whispers

‘With every second slipping away
we become strangers
with every second sliding away
I cease to belong
to anyone, to anything
and strangers we will always be…’

The endlessness of loneliness
the faceless prison guard
rattles their keys
but…

Writing in circles again
I’m chasing your tail
self-referential
to edge of pointlessness

The nihilistic streak in me
vibrates at the thought of you
It’s like I take my pulse
while getting your name tattooed

You’ve got your phantom hook in me
just deep enough to tear
welcome back
o, welcome back…

The most concise statement I ever etched
the most desperately impassioned verse spilt
it’s emblazoned with your image
it squawks for your attention

That devil on my shoulder
lights a cigarette when you smile
it’s like an ache
and all the pills I can take

You’ve got your phantom hook in me
just deep enough to burn
so welcome back
welcome back…

Be gentle with me
say as little as possible
to me…

It will never be as good as it was
it will never feel like it did at the start
but welcome back
welcome back…

[A…

Fairytale or nightmare
Heaven or hell
Common man or devil
This time I can’t tell

Leisure or battle
Sickly not well
Poison or apple
To leave or to dwell

Whole or a sample
Free or for sale
Space or a shackle
Real or a spell

So many I tackle
His shit I can smell
Tongues full of babble
Be quiet or yell

Fist or a grapple
Satin or shell
To flee or to straddle
Correct or misspell

Stand still now or paddle
The boat took a swell
Clear thoughts or to channel
Hello or farewell

© Delia Ross. 2019

---

Dropped spoken word of this on my Tuners account 👍

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Listen to me…

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It is a light, warm rain, so it doesn’t matter
And the moon tonight is full as are your lips
And your eyes are staring at me like I’m her
A feeling that I’ve never had occur

And the only sounds we hear are mostly beats
And it’s getting louder every time we breathe
There’s some danky music far away in the streets
And the rain is louder falling at our feet

The trees are gently sighing with the wind
I whispered in your ear don’t let it end
But I knew that you would ask so I said it again
And as I was repeating you made a grin

I gently started shaking in the rain
It’s like you just released me from my chain
Or maybe just release from all the pain
And tears were the main attraction at this stage

Your fingertips remind me I’m okay
But…

His failures are beautiful strokes of lightning
The waterfall running
A beautiful warning
A star still forming
A winter mourning

He falls like icebergs crumbling in the sea
A white snowfall covering the trees
The wind in the evening as you finally feel the breeze
A moment of reckoning that brings you to your knees

© Delia Ross. 2020

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Listen to Icebergs on Tuners: https://tuners.io/tracks/14337

I wonder under all the dust and worry
Does he ever wish he took a different journey
Will he change the ink and start a different story
Can he clear his vision where it has been blurry

Where the wall is high and the gate is locked
Where her head appears where a door is blocked
Where she keeps her eye on the prey she marked
Where the middle is the plan she plot

And I a whisper or a thought
Or just a dream he never caught
Or a reason he never saught
Or the love for which he should have fought

It matters not if I am up or down
Or if I am sideways or standing
My love for him is never-ending
And should be worn like a crown

© Delia Ross. 2019