Hugs are like sunshine which give life to the seed Into cracks of the heart it will open and seethe And it likely will ignite a smile guaranteed Now that the cracks aren’t so deep underneath It’s possible I may once again breathe you see
There’s always been something about you,
that when I look at you,
my soul just glitters;
Gold energy that seals my wounds
and puts me on display,
at shops in LA
Kintsugi for the soul
A broken soul with golden tear trails
It must look like a lightning bug
on a warm Summer’s day
Every now and then
you’ll catch a glimpse of my soul lighting up
much like when you smile at me
and I blossom like a butter cup
In those moments, life exist
I am not dead just yet
To dream a life of pleasure, Reside a world of hell. Demands partial reason, Denies existence well. A star so dimly lit, Still reached the darkest soul. And in her heart he bit, Consumed it, left a hole.
The shore rises And as our dreams do Hopes are washed away inside us Awards instead of gifts as prizes Pills wrapped in silk disguises With this wave a bit of residue Likely he’ll never get your point of view I’m sorry if I ever troubled you Give love a chance the universe advices We won’t need anymore of those disguises Which road leads to your avenue
Laughter is currency for the soul
It’s way more precious than silver or gold
It can be packaged nicely & gifted or sold
It never cheapens or ages or folds
She breaks like sadness
dancing over the womb
She aches as night
washes over the Moon
If you shine your light
she will run too soon
Overstay your welcome
and she’ll be gone by noon
We’ve been lost on the same road
Making circles back again
We’ve been chasing all the ghost
Who will destroy us in the end
Along the way we have passed
Pretending each were a friend
How long can we last
Avoiding roads full of sin
What test do we pass
Where does the road to love begin
All the signs along the way
Point to never meeting him
WARNING:The following story contains explicit gore, imagery, & death. It is intended for an older audience. Though it is not age restricted, caution should be taken when reading, as it may cause triggers in some due to the sensitive context and subject matter. Proceed with caution.
My Son Part 1: The Promise
“The bloody note, that his lost wife wrote, He found under his pillow, when in the afternoon he awoke. His heart grew weak as he read her final thoughts, her last words about the son she lost, and the promise that she broke. But it sends him right, back to that lovely night, when they felt each other’s love, and gave each other light. But he tears up when he remembers the deed, the love he felt then, seems now like greed. Her promise he would recite. ‘Our life together, darling, has just begun, And I would be honored if you had our son.’ He was her man and she was his lady, and so he asked her to have his baby. Neither hesitated. She lay on the floor, as the blood poured, she felt the one inside, would live no more. And she was crying for help and she called everyone. Thinking that someone could save her son.” The promise lay on the ground torn. The shame she had, when he took her hand, in the hospital room, but he made no demand.
And when he first entered, she wouldn’t even lock, her eyes with his, she just turned toward the wall. Thinking the promise, she would damn. But she looked in time, with her tearing eyes, she wanted to see him, the one she was denied. And when she did, her world was shattered, And put in submission. It was black and bloody and in the fetal position. Her promise was a lie. ‘Our life, my darling, had just begun. I only need my girl and I don’t need a son.’ He said this, but he could not hide his pain, He knew that their love would never be the same. Neither reiterated. And alas one evening, while he was dreaming, she’d lay in the tub, her wrists slashed and bleeding. And when he saw the result his heart receded, it tore apart when her wrists stopped bleeding. The promise she was relieving. And after the police went, And after the trial, After the search of his house, And long after denial, That’s when he found her letter of regret. Buried under his pillow so he couldn’t neglect. But then arose a devious smile. ‘Our life, my darling, has just begun. All I have to do is save some of your blood.’ He knew a man who could restore her life half of this woman would still be half of his wife. Shockingly, he never hesitated.”
I have a picture of a picture It was clear I wasn’t stricter I have a picture of her picture He’d still be here if I were richer It won’t be long & he will ditch her She’ll have a picture of his picture Bury her head deep into the scripture Dreams will cease she’ll be a wisher With just a picture of their picture He’s nothing but an old gold digger I’ve got my finger on the trigger A heavy hitter he’s a sinner You better burn his fucking picture I can hear his fanbase snicker While they drown away in liquor And wish they owned these fucking pictures Maybe I’ll post them all on Twitter It’s something maybe I’ll consider When I’m feeling a bit less bitter
Is there a special niche needed to get through to you?
How much time should one have to pursue?
You threw down the gauntlets and then you withdrew
You said you’d be back but it’s clear that we’re through
I could wait long hours and it’s something you knew
Feeling something real has been long overdue
Longer are the days and the distance accure
I’ll be around if you need someone to talk to
There’s nothing in the world with a better view
I love the hours past all of the curfews
I bet his kisses taste like honey dew
This is why patience is a virtue –
I hope he puts me somewhere in his queue!
I am so grateful for all the traffic that my website has been receiving. It is a great honor to be able to share my words with you and that you keep coming back to read more. As such, and as a thank you, I will be releasing my epic poem in three parts, which previously could only be found in my published book. It is some of my most complex writing to date, and if I were to have a favorite, this would be it. In celebration of over 6,000 visits on my blog, I am giving it to you. I always envisioned it to be turned into a play or short film (or both). So to the actors and visionaries out there, and lovers of all things poetry, perhaps too you should one day want the same (even if I’m no longer here). It is my legacy, my words. Edgar Allan Poe died unknown. And I’ve got visitors from all over the world, so thank you dear reader, from the very center of my soul, for your visits. Stay tuned, My Son Parts 1, 2 & 3 are coming, again as a thank you. And I very much hope you will fall prey to the story, as certainly I did writing it.
He makes me want to sin
But it’d be heaven I contend
The way his words move under my skin
I’d fall for him again and again
I once made my amend
While feeling silence closing in
If only there were more moments to spend
Would he care the places I’ve been?
His silence tortures me
From a bird to a parolee
His energy is beastly
I’d stay in jail, be his detainee
Satisfaction is guaranteed
But there are obstacles to oversee
Invitations with no addressee
His heart is like an Oak tree
Who here desire that love be all one needs?
Surely, I say not for me.
Though love proves a clever disguise,
Love does not make one wise.
It preys upon the weak
The mere beauty only,
For purity it speaks.
And I a blossom yet to bloom,
This cold entraps and seals my wounds.
I dare not think you understand,
Whom stand united, hand in hand?
One by one, or two by two,
These elements can get to you…
His smile is the brightest lighthouse in the galaxy
And even on cold nights, as they always are without him
As I’m bound in all my fallacies
My chances looking grim
He stops and says he enjoys the catastrophes
And all is right again
Have you felt his gravity
Until the doubt sets in?
It was already broken when he arrived
Packaged neatly in pieces and assembly advised
He took me on like he’d won the grand prize
We jumped every hurdle despite those red flags
It’s hard to keep up when one’s memory lags
But on with the show there’s more women to snag!
A map can be drawn from the lies he has spun
You can’t tell from his face at all that he’s won
He moves on so fast though I’m still feeling numb
Aside from a few good lyrics he wrote
He’s worse than a cockroach
He doesn’t care much for silver or gold
His only currency is broken souls
Nearly sixty years collecting his fortune
You’ll find him mostly hanging near a slum
Begging & crawling into every mistake
He can cry a river and still never ache
You need to be careful of that, inviting in the dark
Less it be a longer journey for you to embark
He’s not a guest, wouldn’t make him your patriarch
And during the night is when he’s best dressed
He’ll gather in crowds with her I have guessed
His love is a curse, her soul won’t be blessed
Sometimes come around now & then
It’s hard to forget all the places that I’ve been
I’d rather face the crowd than live a life of pretends
Living an honest life are the roads few transcends
And we both know those aren’t the type of parties he attends
There’s plenty evil in the world for people to defend
And this is where our story must come to an end
But in the future please pick better friends
VS1
Needed some time to clear the things he said
Too many demons were dancing under my bed
Sat around praying and wishing he was dead
I’d be lying to say he was not still inside my head
CHORUS
The river runs dry where there is blood
I missed him so much it always hurt
Went searching for Sun during a flood
It swallowed me down into the mud
That was his love
VS2
Not sure how long has passed I’m still no good
Been feeling so low and well misunderstood
My heart once soft now hard like wood
I know you don’t care though maybe you probably should
CHORUS
The river runs dry where there is blood
I missed him so much it always hurt
Went searching for Sun during a flood
It swallowed me down into the mud
That was his love
The day that you’re dead will be the day that you died
And we both really know you never were alive inside
It won’t be the first time though you made another human cry
But I can promise that you won’t get a drop from these eyes
Some wonder why I’m now desensitized
With a calloused heart but such open lines
Well I took a chance with fate, whatever would betide
These others view, but who in them to confide?
All I do is speak the truth, you can’t read through his lies?
Is it not enough for you, you’re still not clarified
My side is always truth, I cannot lead the blind
Some spaces are not meant together
No matter the force
You & I were antimatter and
You loved me in fourths
My soul was not for you to barter
Yet I had not a choice
How many now were made a martyr
Rules you have to enforce
I’m trying to get my life together
And you seem to stay under the weather
It was love for worse & not for better
There’s a hundred lines now on the matter
To tell the truth I couldn’t be sadder
Loving you required lots of leather
Your marriage proposal wasn’t even legit
You were still married and I didn’t know it
When I discovered you lie, you threw a fit
So your drummer died, you think I give a shit?
You killed any heart I have to admit
But being a bitch requires no permit
You’ll be meeting him soon down in hells pit
Just another minion for Lu to evict
His words will always belie his truth
Underneath the charm a body uncouth
Notice how he’s always feeding on the youth?
Always with his nose sniffing like a sleuth
If you knew his heart you’d find he has no ruth
Crossed the desert with the hand of a devil
Swore down the road I’d find something better
Pretended to lead when I wasn’t able
He knew we’d never be on the same level
Scolded me and gave me a deferral
4 years later we had to uncouple
For a moment I was lost in a fable
Said love is an illusion, not actual
You don’t always have to start at the beginning
Not everything is always about winning
And even your soul needs special innings
There’s too much strife not enough grinning
Right about now you could be imprinting
I hope it’s good energy you’re giving
Bandaging those wounds you’ve been bleeding
There’s no loss severing what’s already ending
I mean it’s pretty bad when you can’t trust your own government
Everyone judges like we’re wrecking havoc
One foot in the grave with their bad habits
Staring at me as if on autopilot
Well I can’t be the only one whose tired of it
I’m not the one who needs a straightjacket
You lie as if honesty were a bullet
Karma is headed your way like a casket
Nothing will please me better than your death certificate
Thank God you never created any other degenerate
I bet your heart is racing now you piece of shit
You ain’t felt nothing yet
Cacophonous sounds from my tv
Lies packaged and wrapped like greetings
Designed to give false readings
Make your heart stop beating
Taking tours in the wasteland
Never was a big fan
He made me cry in Dublin
A mistress as his right hand
Said he’d treat me like a royal
But none of you are loyal
Cause endless paranoia
Broken hearts employer
I don’t wanna know how many days it’s been
It still feels like day one
You and I cannot be friends
And the Earth no longer turns
We spiraled out & lost control again
Yet my heart it still burns
Always made me last instead-
should have been your number one