…it’s a day of hauntings and heartbreak and loss, and maybe just missing things that you never had (but were close enough to hold on and never let go)… …the theme of the poems I’ve been reading on people’s blogs seem to reflect this ‘strange day’ mood…
A Tide’s Breath Apart
*THIS IS A RE-BLOG. PLEASE CLICK THE LINK ABOVE TO VISIT THE ORIGINAL BLOG POST. GET READY TO CRY.*
The moon’s sway
An ocean wave
The love you never gave
My heart’s decay
Stars at night behave
The roads they pave
Forgiveness a knock away
But not today
© Delia Ross. 2020 @poeeternal
I cringe at socialites. Just not my thing. And that’s okay. Introverts deserve recognition too.
I barely can handle family events which is why I pretty much don’t do them anymore either.
And to the ones who give me space to do my work without any bullshit involved, thank you. I’ve said this like a thousand times before, but I am a war vet and I am not a social creature. You shouldn’t base how much I like you, on how often I come around. But there’s also certain platforms that I have gotten off of, for the most part like Facebook, because it’s toxic as fuck. I had stayed on the Instagram and Twitter but I’m kind of falling off the Twitter now too.
You’ll notice I’ve never had a contact box on my blog. I don’t participate in prompts. I’m currently not doing collabs. I’m not good with communicating anymore either. I don’t do social events, I don’t do social outings. I don’t people. I don’t even like knocks at my door or phone calls. I have disabilities and health issues that keep me isolated. But I still have to kill off friendships because they get mad at me for not wanting to go hang out at a bar. I don’t even drink. 👎👎
You can bribe me with food though at any point in the day. Be extra careful though at midnight because that’s when I’m the hungriest and turn into a gremlin if I DON’T EAT.
On the upside, I am considering adding a limited number video chat tier to my Patreon, as many writers and artists offer it. Can discuss anything, writing, read me something you’re working on, chat about the weather, get writing tips, get feedback on a project you’re working on. Whatever! Regular stuffs that these video chats are for (the non sex work stuff)!
I’m also wanting to add a print tier (which is coming hopefully within the next 60 days) and if I could get enough support rolling in, a cosplay nude tier. Costumes, makeup, props, equipment, these things require money. I’ll be needing to update my goals on my Patreon soon as I’m growing thanks to your feedback, encouragement, and continued support! ❤💪💪💪❤
I like my privacy and my solitude but you know, there are narcissists out there who give you the cold shoulder for it. I’m not freezing tho. I’ve got shelter. I paid my electric and rent + 9000 other basic cost of living expenses which keep the poor poor. But my feet are warm. I mean, the narcissists tools of manipulation just don’t work on me anymore. Sorry not sorry. Hungry and suicidal. On edge 24/7. Want to be on my own, create art and fuck the patriarchy… Basic 101. Art was always meant to be political. Or rather anarchical and against the norm. HELLO, THAT’S ME!!! *waves*
Thanks for checking out my work and supporting independent writers and mental health warriors! 💖
I’m on the Patreon, if you dig my writing and photography or digiart, there’s loads of EXCLUSIVE CONTENT up! You get cool perks for pledging and I get to keep writing and running my blog advert free! I really like writing! I’ve been practicing my art since I was a little girl, thank you for giving me the opportunity to do it professionally! 😍
http://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
Block the cold winds blowing from the north
Frozen in time mistakes keep you from moving forth
Like the heavy winds from the north
You stop and weap
Holding down a crumbling fort
Eight days a week
You carry regret like a torch
Reminder: time is short
Open quarters
Small circles
Blown mortars
Follow orders
Closed borders
Such horror
All blurs
No cures
Blood pours
More tours
Four doors
His wars
© Delia Ross. 2020
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal
People see what they want
Written words seem to haunt
Tossed about there to flaunt
The way his silence makes me daunt
The way the spiral loses gain
The way his tether’s locked to chain
The way his feet are in refrain
The way his messages still reign
I have circled ’round the Earth
Until him I had no worth
Loving him through this rebirth
I hope my pain is not his mirth
So his name I’m calling forth
Keep the compass pointed north
His whole heart as my fort
So this love we can’t abort
© Delia Ross. 2020
If you dig my writing, and would like to see this blog continue, you can support my advertisement free blog by subscribing to my Patreon here (please & thank you): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
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Gone but now back again
And by the end of the week
You’ll be missing then
It’s becoming routine
A cycle of ends
And now another peak
Is there ever zen
If honesty were to leak
I needed a friend
So frail and rarely meek
Are these Earthmen
It’s not what I seek
And you are carcinogen
© Delia Ross. 2019
Could use a fag now actually… (do Americans know it’s slang for cigarettes!?!)
Read: A Visit From Lu Part 1
A Visit From Lu Part 2
Now it is true Lu has been after me since about 1978
Ever since I fled the compounds of those Pearly gates
Restricted to forever yet I castrated my own fate
I fell beyond the heavens to see what love I could create
“Alright, enough with the charades”, Lu had finally said
“Why did you call me here” as he leaned across my bed
And I a child started giggling until my face was turning red
But careful is the food I chew when it’s the devil passing bread
It was in this moment that both our eyes connected
I often wondered how many souls he had collected
Which of the seven sins had the best method
And was the numbers what they both expected
Those numbers won’t mean anything, if Lu can’t collect, both of my wings
Black as onyx, soft as silk, one feather would please all the kings
There’s unspoken pleasures that my feather brings
There’s only one in the world with the deed to these blessings
“First off Lu, I never called you here”
“If I were to pray now, it would be for you to disappear
My soul is not for bargain, let me make it clear –
I seem to remind you year after year…”
And now he knows I am speaking truth
Honesty, it’s what earned my wings of youth
He knows lying here, will never be of use
It is why I’m such a challenge and one he cannot lose
To be continued…!?!
© Delia Ross. 2019
Read: A Visit From Lu Part 3
How are you liking this fantasy religion stuffs? Should I continue the story with part 3? I’ve been sort of taking the long way around, so I haven’t really got to the bread-and-butter yet. 😄
Really dig the last line in the 2nd stanza tho, I did goods there, right? 🤔 Made it worth writing part two me thinks.
The days are slow, the nights are longer
Without the white of moon, he will wonder
Without the glare of sun, he will wander
And when the Moon is full so is his hunger
He has been going down a path of the unknown
Following her, in any weather, through any zone
Treading on forever, any havoc, any wrong
He has known the route for ages, for she is his kingdom
© Delia Ross. 2019
Kingdom come, thy will be done, come conquer this land… amens
Sitting on the corner of depression avenue
I’ll wave with a smile when you pass by me too
I’ve been here awhile so I’ve got the right attitude
You’d think by my grin I had the winning suit
But underneath the cards there’s a truth I will never refute
And every part of me needs repaired, even the soles of my boot
How quickly by you flee on a journey I would love to commute
But I’ve got a darkness troubling me and I feel it, deep down in my root
And so I isolate the need that you bring on this road where I pollute
But your words have me jumping out of a plane without a parachute
And if you were to measure the love it would be absolute
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© Delia Ross. 2019
There exists a world where we communicate
It’s daily in my mind to help ease the ache
In prayer where I kneel for you and wait
While dreaming even though I am wide awake
There is a road where you and I always meet
I follow a meadow to Cosmic Street
There’s never an obstacle to worry our feet
Your kiss is the very reason my heart will beat
© Delia Ross. 2019
There is a tourniquet on her tongue
There is a swell in her heart where he stung
There are written words that remain unsung
There is a list of wrongs that they all hung
There is a trail of ash where lightning struck
There is a stem remaining from her petals he pluck
There is a girl with hope but never any luck
There is quicksand where her feet are stuck
There are rooms without any remorse
And days we seem to make it worse
Where life exists only in verse
They leak from pages and turn to curse
There is a small window where he may care
But you will never get to meet him there
He will pull the blind so they cannot stare
And wear a mask that says beware
There are stones to throw whether wrong or right
And reasons to keep them all up at night
There are teeth attached to mouths that bite
And mistakes so bright you won’t need a light
There are roads we build of the unknown
With caverns of secrets we will never own
And shame like ice we carve a home
Faces with frowns of moments blown
If you stop and take a look around
At your feet growing up from the ground
It grows so high now past your crown
This is where the seeds of love are found
© Delia Ross. 2019
Moving forward, turning corners, never finding home
Keep listening, less speaking, and most are always wrong
I go the distance that few ever roam
Universal lessons seem to keep me on my own
Often these tribulations can only be learned alone
Weakened and discouraged I’ll stop but not for long
My heart more calloused and hard like bone
Whatever it takes to keep me strong
With the wisdom of knowing that looking back can turn me to stone
And so this lesson I pack up and carry
The weight of them always seems to vary
Some are black and some are cherry
Some will taste like a strawberry
Some will make you say Hail Mary
Some are found in the morning obituary
Most will leave you cold and weary
With eyes that sting and oh so blurry
These streets have roadkill of doubt and worry
Self-medicate to try and heal
And get the energy to climb uphill
Another battle of self-will
Another demon I have to kill
Swallow the pain just like a pill
Buried deep so I can’t feel
There’s mostly lows and little thrill
And not an exit out of here
By now my soul is feeling ill
The answers are never clear
Tie my boot without goodbye
Can’t sit around to watch me cry
More of those with every sigh
If you could open it and peer inside
It would likely appear tie-dye
Like an endless horizon in the sky
Pinks and purples which mystify
There my soul longs to fly
Not depths of low but certain high
And now not a tear in my eye
You’ll never get close to me
I live by this decree
Very few are ever worthy
But God has a skeleton key
Buried under a Joshua Tree
Searching will leave you thirsty
The depths I’ve cried fill up a sea
And by this I’m already drowning
It’s past my knee
But the undertow came quickly
© Delia Ross. 2019
You should have kept it a buried treasure
You should have taken another adventure
His love will make you poorer not richer
The taste of his bite is only bitter
A bad seed from his rotten apple
The taste of his lips makes one babel
Leaving you with lessons you’ll never grapple
Poison your tongue so you can never tattle
Holy water will run from the unclean
Circle and burrow paths for a new stream
A king can grow apples from a bad seed
A queen never takes a road to mislead
© Delia Ross. 2019
I promise to listen
Always with intention
To understand
If you can hold me
Instead of scold me
I will be your best friend
I don’t need more lessons
Or other people’s blessings
To love my man
I won’t ask you questions
Or demand from you confessions
If you let me join your clan
Please let your worries lessen
I’ll never keep you guessing
Our love will never need a plan
The moon it now shines crescent
My love is on fluorescent
There’s enough for your entire lifespan
© Delia Ross. 2019
You can take the long road or the wrong road
A shorter path makes for a tougher load
The fastest route is the one most slowed
There are obstacles whichever you go
There doesn’t need to be any smoke screens
We won’t need protection from Marines
Pick up the ball and drop your routines
This nightmare could turn into our dreams
You can meet me down this way
Come on, I really want to play
These are the moments that make up each day
These are the terrors from which we stray
I know I’m not the direction you were leaning
Guest and greetings, always lose meaning
Destiny arrived and is here intervening
The past is yours alone for weaning
Underneath these city lights
There are no wrong or rights
Lovers go to new heights
Kisses come as invites
© Delia Ross. 2019
His smile is a compass
Or lighthouse that guides me home
A permanent road where I’m free to roam
All enemies who enter he’ll crush
When I’m lost and all alone
I feel a sudden gentle brush
And smell a scent not like cologne
My senses ignite like a gold rush
He stands there like a stone
Fully aware he’s on his throne
My voice once loud now hush
Who needs flowers when your cheeks are flush
© Delia Ross. 2019
The shore rises
And as our dreams do
Hopes are washed away inside us
Awards instead of gifts as prizes
Pills wrapped in silk disguises
With this wave a bit of residue
Likely he’ll never get your point of view
I’m sorry if I ever troubled you
Give love a chance the universe advices
We won’t need anymore of those disguises
Which road leads to your avenue
© Delia Ross. 2019
We’ve been lost on the same road
Making circles back again
We’ve been chasing all the ghost
Who will destroy us in the end
Along the way we have passed
Pretending each were a friend
How long can we last
Avoiding roads full of sin
What test do we pass
Where does the road to love begin
All the signs along the way
Point to never meeting him
© Delia Ross. 2019
PoeEternal 