indifference – Page 3

Posted on October 9, 2019October 9, 2019 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Middle

I’ll take the middle of the night, when I’m feeling alright.
I’ll take the middle of the rush, I can never get enough.
I’ll take the middle of your love, where it fits like a glove.
I’ll take the middle of the page, and the center of your stage.
I’ll take the middle of your lie, the part you said you would try.
I’ll take the middle of the day, it feels the same anyway!
I’ll take the middle of knowing, that is where truth starts glowing.
I’ll take the middle of goodbye, that’s where our love died.
I’ll take the middle of nowhere, that’s the place I don’t care.

Posted on October 6, 2019October 6, 2019 by poeeternal

Pondering

Can you love a man?
But not know him?
Does love exist?
What type is it?

Can you want a dream?
Without anything?
Can you feel a thing?
Without noticing?

Can you give it a try?
Without the alibi?
Can you draw the line?
Some other time?

Can we start again?
As a real friend?
What can you admit?
Am I that easy to quit?

In comes another nail
The devil on my tail
He smiles while he impales
Off my sorrow he sails

There he goes again, always with the wind, there he goes again, always with the end

Posted on October 6, 2019October 6, 2019 by poeeternal

Mirage 2.0

I thought that he was far away but he doesn’t exist
I thought they were a bouquet of poems, not a blade to cut my wrist
For a moment, I felt loved, now I feel his fist
And whatever I’ve done, well he’s over it

One, two, three, four, there’s so many grabbing at his line
It was written for her but now nevermind
And if he can’t have her, we get zero rhyme
If he only knew they left us completely blind

He kept us marching so long in the desert
And thirsty we were for any squirt
We were just disciples for him to hurt
And the connections that were made he doesn’t give a fuck

Posted on October 5, 2019 by poeeternal

Caught Between the Devil

Caught between the devil and the deep blue sea
Caught between dilemma and what you mean to me
Caught between a wrong and caught without my sight
Caught me with my mind when it wasn’t screwed on tight

Caught between the truth and having privacy
But none of these reasons grant you the right to see
Caught between an answer and caught beneath the light
Caught between the bygones and a hand that seems to bite

Caught between an angel and where a devil blew his horn
Caught between the towers falling in an endless mourn
Caught between a moral and caught between a fight
Caught between the will to not end my life tonight

I don’t know if I did that Devil phrase any justice but then I completely changed the rhyme scheme in the end but also many of the end words and then I couldn’t decide on whether to keep going or not… because feelings. And I know I could have carried on the rhyme scheme in the end but, rebel…

Posted on October 3, 2019 by poeeternal · 5 Comments

Hunter

Hunting for a future
Hunting for a life
Hunting for a meaning
To not end it tonight

Hunting for a mirror
That doesn’t reflect strife
Searching for an answer
When the question’s never right

Searching for the devil
Under the pale moonlight
Searching for forever
In the middle of a fight

Searching for the handle
Of the blade that’s in my back
Searching for the color
When all I see is black

Searching in my heart
For the love it always lacks
Searching for some shelter
From the endless reign of attacks

Searching for my enemy
In every hand I hold
Searching for some peace
In a land it isn’t sold

Searching for some warmth
In a heart forever cold
Searching for the treasure
But never finding gold

Searching for the best
By bringing out the worst
Searching for the bubbles
To come along and burst

Hunting near the tower
Where she brings out your thirst
Searching in the pages
Of how to stop her curse

Searching in a shadow
Where a truth was still a first
Searching any bottle
Or any woman who can nurse

Searching for the cure
But nothing ever works
Kissing many frogs
But only finding jerks

Searching for an exit
Where it doesn’t ever hurt
Searching for the day
You put in more effort

Searching and hunting
But only gathering dirt
He’s an ocean on an island
And time is the desert

Oh my goodness, kinda long, I hope it wasn’t too boring. I’m sorry my intelligence is that of a child and I can’t lure you in with exotic words and fancy punctuation. I know I’m not enough, I never have been voluptuous in any area. *sigh

Posted on September 21, 2019September 21, 2019 by poeeternal

CONFUSION FRONT AND CENTER

I placed it in the trash but he said it wasn’t broke
I put it on the shelf then he said it doesn’t work

I offered him a piece but he didn’t take my pie
Yet he doesn’t want me giving it to another guy

Anytime that I move forward there appears another gate
But if I turn around he’s flagging to go straight

I might have said some things that I never meant to say
But he will plead the fifth or look the other way

I tried to read the signs but they’re written in foreign
And even if they were it wouldn’t stop me from adoring

I really wish he liked me but he doesn’t think I’m witty
I don’t fall on the list of girls that he finds pretty

I listened to his reason but it’s confusion front-and-center
And when I said I loved him the season turned to winter

I stumble through the weather like I am a zombie
And watching me break must be his favorite hobby

Posted on September 18, 2019 by poeeternal

Prozac

I told the doctor I don’t want to be issued Prozac
He guarantees, it’ll help the things, my future lack
I told the pharmacist, I had things I needed to get off my back
And with a smile, or a devil’s grin, I reached and took my sack

I told my friends, I’m sleeping well, though an insomniac
I tell them still, I’m up the hill, but I can’t relax
I take a knee, and pray to God, that was the climax
Both depression and anxiety yelling back at me to face the facts

Sidenote: I don’t really take Prozac but I could throw at you a slew of other prescriptions. Though I’m advocating for medical mary to be written for vets…because truthfully, it’s the ONE thing that works (and I feel less like ripping someone’s head off). If vets had access to medicinal mary, there’d be less suicides because big Pharma actually does make you more suicidal and so the propaganda and fear-mongering against that plant needs to stop *pops pill*

Posted on September 17, 2019September 17, 2019 by poeeternal

King of Sorrows

His divine right of suffering
King of the weepings
Destroyer of the weaklings
Master of your feelings
Mirrors on the ceilings
Where doubts keep repeating
And devils roam these evenings
Angels bow for healings
Desperate for his feedings
Mercy stops the bleeding
Will follow where he’s fleeting
His darkness as a greeting
Doom is where he’s leading
Every day keeps repeating
Nothing stops the needing
Where love is now receding
Where I’ve lost my meaning
He’ll never stop my dreaming
An enemy to your pleading
Your crime for ever seeking
The secrets he ain’t leaking
His patience nearly peaking
His angel never speaking
Whatever keeps him grieving
He gives what he’s receiving
Though neither want for leaving

On a whim, had to go freestyle, so many feels…and therapeutic. ✌️

Posted on September 11, 2019 by poeeternal · 16 Comments

Narrow Views

Narrow views, he once said
Then I killed where it bled

Narrow views, I declined
He only speaks when he’s blind

Narrow views, they bring me down
Now I roam this empty ghost town

Narrow views, is your hue
It matches every silhouette of you

Narrow views, in her mind
But still she closed his blind

Narrow views, the two will find
As they circle where confined

Narrow views, and in his knife
But the Army trained me to not feel life

Narrow views, all around
Watch us all become the clown

Narrow views, it might be true
But when it comes to him I already knew

Narrows views, to hide the shame
Take a picture, put it in a frame

Narrow views, is that your view?
I don’t remember ever asking you

Narrow views, the bell did ring
But for him, honesty was never waiting

Narrow views, his tongue did lie
Watched him clean the blade, without goodbye

Narrow views, the angel sang
But underneath the sound, he felt her fang

Narrow views, they are to blame
Even your mirror, reflects the same

Narrow views, are buried here
And with a tiny view, you watch me disappear

Narrows views, keep circling
But I’m off the freeway and already exiting

Narrow views, they make me pissed
Then I remembered, I was already over it

Narrows views, he gifted me
But I already had the foresight to see

Narrow views, he doesn’t understand
This hell he keeps, I own the land!

Narrow views, I’ll make it clear
Because I don’t need a foggy atmosphere

Narrow views, stay in your queue
Take responsibility for what you do

Narrow views, whip across my back
As I kneel, from all I lack

Narrow views, I’ll carry your cross
The weight of you, I felt the loss

Narrows views and a broken wing
It was only love I was offering

Posted on August 30, 2019August 30, 2019 by poeeternal · 8 Comments

Clot

There it was I thought
But then again maybe not
It is tangled in a knot
A wound without a clot

And yet bigger that it got
It smelled of death and rot
He said he knew but he forgot
And neither cared to clean the spot

And while the witch did stir the pot
Along she came a wretched trot
And with her pen she took a shot
And I seek naught the thing she brought

HE WANTS TO KNOW WHERE MY LOVE WENT *LAUGHS INSANELY*

There’s a hurricane headed to Florida and there’s a good chance I’ll lose Communications for a bit.

Posted on August 5, 2019 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Undiscovered

I live in the words of how another sees me
I live inside the bruises of past enemies
Ex-lovers chain me to memories of who I used to be
Held to the past of visions I am now blind to see

Many with offerings of second chances
But none offer a dime to help with my finances
I’ve been under their rule and cancelled the classes
That girl died when I removed her tinted glasses

I had to untangle the worry where it had knotted
I had to prune the weeds where my heart had rotted
I had to learn to dance where my memories were haunted
I had to hug the parts they all said were unwanted

I may be alone but I am not desperate
People may change but I’m still a skeptic
I may be tame but I’m growing restless
I may be weak but I’ve never been helpless

It is true I’ve taken many lovers
My past is filled with several colors
Regrets have visited over many summers
So much wasted time for a love still undiscovered

Posted on July 24, 2019 by poeeternal

Homeless

That sound is silence
The quiet act in violence
My thoughts in a riot
As if on autopilot

He is not the best
Not even a little
Though like the rest
I’ve set for remittal

Just maybe he is the worst
As I fell for him first
But he is an endless thirst
With no quench for the cursed

The damned be gone!
There is never any dawn
I must carry on
Where his ghost has spawn

I make love to nothing
A ghost I am hunting
One with his absence
A love without an address

Posted on July 20, 2019 by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Scarecrow

Take a bite of silence
Spread it like a virus

Watch the hour widen
Feel the pain ripen

As hearts growing calloused
Whose wall is tallest

Add it to the distance
A sweet tongue now viscous

A truth more painful than a lie
A hello more terrifying than goodbye

With all parties now listening
Two of the same are wishing

On a star which died many years ago
What remains is a shadow

Though they wouldn’t know
No they wouldn’t know

He remains as a scarecrow
Protecting over his soul

Posted on July 18, 2019July 18, 2019 by poeeternal

Stone

Moving forward, turning corners, never finding home
Keep listening, less speaking, and most are always wrong
I go the distance that few ever roam
Universal lessons seem to keep me on my own
Often these tribulations can only be learned alone
Weakened and discouraged I’ll stop but not for long
My heart more calloused and hard like bone
Whatever it takes to keep me strong
With the wisdom of knowing that looking back can turn me to stone

And so this lesson I pack up and carry
The weight of them always seems to vary
Some are black and some are cherry
Some will taste like a strawberry
Some will make you say Hail Mary
Some are found in the morning obituary
Most will leave you cold and weary
With eyes that sting and oh so blurry
These streets have roadkill of doubt and worry

Self-medicate to try and heal
And get the energy to climb uphill
Another battle of self-will
Another demon I have to kill
Swallow the pain just like a pill
Buried deep so I can’t feel
There’s mostly lows and little thrill
And not an exit out of here
By now my soul is feeling ill
The answers are never clear

Tie my boot without goodbye
Can’t sit around to watch me cry
More of those with every sigh
If you could open it and peer inside
It would likely appear tie-dye
Like an endless horizon in the sky
Pinks and purples which mystify
There my soul longs to fly
Not depths of low but certain high
And now not a tear in my eye

You’ll never get close to me
I live by this decree
Very few are ever worthy
But God has a skeleton key
Buried under a Joshua Tree
Searching will leave you thirsty
The depths I’ve cried fill up a sea
And by this I’m already drowning
It’s past my knee
But the undertow came quickly

Posted on July 6, 2019July 10, 2019 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Sun and Moon

BOOM…
Her noise crashed into existence
An adulterer of daylight
In the eyes of the night a mistress
Still the Sun would chase her with all of his might
Penetrating years to lessen the distance
Every sky diamond flickers white candle light
But ask him of commitment and he’s a terrible witness
He will disappear before the Moon is in sight
His energy expelled before the ink dries from words written
Feeding from his lies as a tiny parasite
Chewing on his poison never seeking his permission
Ignoring red flags as your soul fills with blight
Asking for truth only delivers misinformation
Dancing for love on the back of the night
Keep chasing light despite its resistance

Posted on July 5, 2019July 6, 2019 by poeeternal

Awareness

Our words like feathers carry no weight
To his ears an uninvited guest who overstayed
Still we’re spoonfed lies to minimize the ache
Just an innocent bystander who took the bait

He will circle you inside a barricade
He will taste the wound to see if you’re afraid
He will take the route you feel most betrayed
His words were never there to offer aid

If you need more pain he will accommodate
If you want his love he won’t participate
There are many already at his gate
His hands will lead you straight to his grave

I would gladly place my life at his blade
And gently kiss his hands as they preyed
And from my mouth not one complaint
And though dying my eyes finally awake

Posted on June 30, 2019June 30, 2019 by poeeternal

Debris

I got to where I never cry
I can feel the hours passing by
I keep the blinds closed from any sunshine
It doesn’t cost me a dime
To waste all my time
It feels like the wrong design
I still tell them all that I’m fine

Suffocate on all the energy
Surrounded by negativity
Completely numb without sensory
Nothings ever bothering me
Nothing to ever do, no one to see
Married to my invisibility
My soul a wasteland filled with debris

Posted on June 24, 2019June 27, 2019 by poeeternal · 2 Comments

Goodbye

I will always love you from afar
The same way I love a distant star
And cast wishes under its light
Where I pray for you every night

I will always wonder where you are
What catastrophic event pushed you so far
Your heart a celestial sphere
But you never let anyone near

And on nights when the sky is clear
I cry into the atmosphere
I couldn’t tell you the hour dear
Every moment I wish you were here

You and I live under the same sky
The winds blow west and carry my cry
With raining tears and a heavy sigh
I lie and promise this is not goodbye

Posted on April 16, 2019 by poeeternal · 1 Comment

Emotional Cargo

I wish I didn’t know what it is that I know
I’d stop myself from going down a path I never grow
Then I’d never sneer when I see an old photo
I’d never ever wonder who I’d be without the woe

I wish I didn’t know what it is that I know
I’d stop myself from packing all of this emotional cargo
I seem to carry it with me no matter where it is I go
I’d gladly give it to you but there’s no place left to stow

Posted on January 28, 2019January 28, 2019 by poeeternal · 1 Comment

Breaks Like Sadness

She breaks like sadness
dancing over the womb
She aches as night
washes over the Moon
If you shine your light
she will run too soon
Overstay your welcome
and she’ll be gone by noon

Posted on January 23, 2019 by poeeternal

Severed Connections

Always alone, what else do we know?
We have grown accustomed to loom
Universally we stand connected
By lines to each other’s doom

How erroneous to accept
The progress of dreaming,
The TV is on, my computer is streaming
All the world is aglow…

Posted on January 23, 2019January 23, 2019 by poeeternal

A Chapter Yet Filled

Who here desire that love be all one needs?
Surely, I say not for me.
Though love proves a clever disguise,
Love does not make one wise.
It preys upon the weak
The mere beauty only,
For purity it speaks.

And I a blossom yet to bloom,
This cold entraps and seals my wounds.
I dare not think you understand,
Whom stand united, hand in hand?
One by one, or two by two,
These elements can get to you…

Posted on June 6, 2018June 6, 2018 by poeeternal

Apathy

I have but apathy to loan
Where once a heart of gold
Now all but shades of stone

The clouds a frown
The dirt my home

I am but a shadow more
The frost withered on the grass
A sound upon shattered glass
A wall without a door

Find me on:

PoeEternal

Tag: indifference