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OOPS (Blog boo boos again)

I am inadvertently unfollowing accounts that I don’t want to unfollow when I’m trying to unfollow multiple accounts that I do not interact with or whom do not interact with me. When I first opened up my account, I was following any Tom, Dick and Harry, or suggestions recommended to me and I’m trying to clean up my feed so I can interact with the people I DO want to interact with more. I suffered a brain injury while in the Army, so when I accidentally unfollow accounts, I can’t always remember your Blog name, and most of you do not have your actual blog link in your Gravatar profile and so I can’t find you. Sometimes I’m aware of the mistake right away and sometimes I don’t realize it until days later when I’m like ‘why the fuck aren’t you posting and in my feed’. Then I have to go on a hunt to find a post where you commented or something. I still have around 300 accounts I need to unfollow so these boo-boos might happen again.

Please don’t let me go days without you, if you’ve noticed I’ve unfollowed you and it doesn’t seem normal can you at least shoot me a comment or something? Just say “hey, did you mean to unfollow” or something and I’ll correct it right away! If I unfollowed you and you have any kind of negative reaction about it, please message me, because it was more than likely a mistake. And it’s already happened a few times to accounts I didn’t want to unfollow. And so all that lingering confusion and doubt was festering. Just shoot me a message or comment! Uh oh’s happen, I come with mistakes.

Nosferatu (selfie)
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Love, Sensuality, Devotion

If I were capable, I would build him a boat,
He could sail through the storms, I seem to evoke.
He could cruise through the wind, and never lose hope,
And the distance we keep, would not feel so remote.

If I were capable of obtaining perfection,
In the mirror, he would see my reflection.
If he could believe, that he made a connection,
Maybe he could see, I am trying to change my complexion.

If I were able, to shorten the distance,
A home in me, would appear into existence.
He could visit me, at this very instance,
And the safety he seeks, would never go missing.

If secrets we keep, would be less of a burden,
I would reach into where he seems to keep hurting.
I would pay with my life, to open his curtain,
And the life that he seeks, would not be uncertain.

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Things (but mostly love)

Her hopes take flight, it catches starlight, it rides the night, it gives her dreams sight, for his love she will fight


He knows not his creed but it is burned to my tongue-
Like a tattoo by fate, open my gate and come

Please need me

I crawled on when my hope was gone
I saw sun but my eyes were burned
I found love where the hand was numb
I gave love when it would not come


He writes the most beautiful poetry
And I want to organize them into little treasures for my mind
An instrument of the finest wording and it starts with his rhyme
Pluck a note from me, as I’m slightly off key
It doesn’t take much to tune me when his writing is my shrine
He intoxicates me better than the finest wine

His words should come with a sign that reads, “do not engage”

So innocent was her love, so pure
The bouquet of poetry he would write would allure
It was love of this she was sure
In the afterglow of words she felt secure

Want a dose of paranoia mixed with anxiety? Well, if he is her and you are me and they are them, then who the fuck is she?

He doesn’t know it but he is a giant in my heart.

He was unaware of her worth
But there was something in her eye
And the look was divine
And it tasted of desire
Love sprung from the Earth


Everyone seems to be living such wonderful lives and I just want to hide in his eyes

He comes back for my love
When he’s lost his reserve
Just as I am giving up

Most days my soul is suffocating
Bouncing up and down
Flipping and flopping
Gasping for air
Frantic and in despair
Where is the life?

Silence brings violence

He’s not quite 6 feet but every bit iron foot

Just because you think I’m perfect doesn’t mean you shouldn’t tell me I’m good. Just because you don’t think I’m worth it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t tell me I could.

Death didn’t hurt. Everything else did.

He moves fast through my heart like rapids…

What I would give to be shifted to number one.

Love goes on through the seasons.

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Safehouse

If there is a world where I exist
Please visit
I am a rainbow just waiting to get sunkissed
Like a solar flare my moods can get explicit
But it is through destruction where life has risen
And now you give love a speed limit
And you tie a ribbon of shame around my spirit
You label yourself “critic”
Where once a safehouse requiring no picket
I’d enter, I’d rest, and my dreams were so vivid
I’d cry and I’d dance and I loved you every minute
Your love was a sticky mist
I inhaled all of it (give me a fix)

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Perfect Form

If I were a moon, he’d be an asteroid
If I were open space, he would be the void
If truth were a promise, he would be the lie
If beginnings had beginnings, he would be goodbye

If I were an ocean, he’d be the shark
If reasons had meaning, he’d tear it apart
If weather were gentle, he’d be the eye of a storm
If cold were a shoulder, his would have perfect form

© Delia Ross. 2019

Inspired by something I heard in John Wick 2… had to revisit the entire chapters after watching 3. Neo warming up for The Matrix 4. John Wick 3 is by far the best of the chapters, it just slayed. Martial arts makes me kinda sloppy wet (or maybe that’s just Keanu Reeves, KIDDING chill sheesh) 🙃🙃🙃😛

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Destination: Love

He is part of a world I wish I was in
The story is open, the pages are thin
Love is where I’m going but it’s never where I’ve been
The road is full of obstacles and requires some discipline

The clouds passing by bring a current of hope
The fog dissipates with all of my mope
The sun bursts with a new horoscope
The sky is a blanket where my sorrows can cope

I took my depression and left it in a back alleyway
I may return for it again someday
And when my fears visit, they’ll arrive in a beautiful bouquet
And if you ever forgive me, that day will be a permanent holiday

Set the controls to where my heart is churning
Look all directions, you’ll see our fire burning
There is never a day for you I am not yearning
Some practice of forgiveness is worth learning

© Delia Ross. 2019

I lied though, ‘cuz he is really my favorite poet. I can feel him inspire every little fiber and molecule in me… just saying.

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Love Beats On

“Stop! What are you doing?”, he demanded an answer holding a look of shock
Her face stained with black mascara and fear so thick she could hardly talk
He kneeled down beside her, their eyes in a gridlock
“I’ve learned you are the one and now it’s time to walk the walk”
Lips connected and fate started their heart clock

Love beats on…

© Delia Ross. 2019

A sad beginning with a happy ending. The middle is now. Unwritten.

Sad angel (selfie)
Teach me that I’m worth more than my mistakes (selfie)
I think people should be worth more than their mistakes (selfie)
Don’t you? (Selfie, no filter)
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Bad Feathers

Her wings wrought from sorrow, stained with regret
And if there’s any forgiveness, he hasn’t given it yet
If love had a mirror it would reflect his spirit
If any hand were worthy, his has merit

She wraps her wing around his heart
She prays it helps the pain depart
It is not a solution but it is a start
Even angels are known to break apart

She awaits quietly in silent prayer
As she tends his heart from its despair
There is no love that can compare
She plucks out bad feathers showing wear and tear

She shuts her eyes and makes a wish
She simmers any flames of anguish
So love may again feel its warmest
Where for him it was found coldest

© Delia Ross. 2019

I’d remove every feather if it meant never hurting you again.

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Wrath

“I do terribly bad things”, she said with a saddened sorrow
“Spontaneous combustion”, Lu replied
She was gazing in her mirror, Lu was just behind
Leaning on her shoulder, like he was her beau

He goes places with her no other will go
He knows too many things he shouldn’t know
A mask to Lu is an open window
The thicker they get, the more that you owe

“My tongue is full of sin” she said
As she took a blade, her eyes were blood red
The cold steel on her neck, her gaze still ahead
With careful, quick precision, Lu swiped the blade from her hand, he was never much of a figurehead

“Terribly bad things”, as she crashed to the floor
A creature of the underworld, and she could take no more
Too many souls abandoned, what is she fighting for
If only love could be her savior

“Hey kid, they only fear your purity because they sin,
They act tough where their skin is thin,
They create chaos in an endless cycle they spin,
They search for winnings, where the devil will always win”

With a hand that swung with the thunder of Thor
With a face of refusal and ready for war
With her hand on the trigger and ready to score
Standing an inch from the devil she let out a roar

© Delia Ross. 2019

Do you ever feel like the devil is on your shoulder? That was sort of the goal for the bathroom mirror scene. Now’s he’s been all through the house. Time to see a priest, deep, dark thoughts abide. Maybe an exorcist too. Definitely could use spiritual cleansing from a psychic.

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Cobwebs

He spins a web of confusion
He spews we are living in delusion
That won’t stop him from carrying on
His mask cannot hide his beacon

And without reason, I follow the action
I was taught love is twice bitten
Well, maybe his web leads to Eden
It matters not how many webs are spun

I crawl over fragmented dreams and broken bones
It makes me ponder how many hearts he owns
Are they easy to collect like clones
Does he cherish the ones dethroned from their thrones

The stickier the web, the heavier the bloodstones
The harder the heart, the more sinful the wrongs
The farther we part, the heavier the moans
The more you punish, the darker the zones

© Delia Ross. 2019

For the most part, I put all my darkness into my poetry, or my art, I wouldn’t actually bite his head off in real life… the follow unfollow routine might be annoying but seriously there are worse crimes. And I’m trying to refrain from allowing others to trigger me. I have written him so much beautiful rhyme, it would be a shame to focus on the few falls between. xxoo

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What Would Edgar Do?

Dear Edgar, tell me, what is it you would do?
Did your love make you a prisoner, too?
You crafted her poems and she loved you,
But that doesn’t work for me, no matter what I do.

Dear Poe, you were a cryptologist, you can solve this code?
The answer must be hidden, but the window has narrowed.
He keeps his soul hidden, where none have burrowed,
But ever since I found him, time has simply slowed.

© Delia Ross. 2019

I suppose he would die of a drunken, broken heart, naked and broke on the streets. Feels vaguely familiar…

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Starlight

poeeternal's avatarPoeEternal

Love her wild
Leave her full
Touch her mild
You will see her form

She will make your indigo glow
She will carve out a chunk so you may have a root
She will give life to the lip
In her, you can grow
You can wallow
You can save your soul

Let her jump in and taste your desire
Infinity is deep
So is her reach
And the distance you keep

The only witness is love
We’ve got that as our teacher
Even your name ends with her

She brings on the rain that can make you clean
Crawl under her to feel something

Your seeds were planted for sprouting
The direction you’re going needs a little rerouting

The night is pierced with scars
The light is breaking through
The doubt is gone from you
Watch her twinkle too

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Stones of Regret

Underneath the stones of regret peace is found
Though the tether is outstretched it is still bound
The weather grew punishing and so too his frown
But my love for him keeps circling around

And I try my hardest to stand
But this depression keeps showing its ugly hand
And I’m trying to fly but in his heart I just crash-land
And it breaks my heart I did it again

So with my broken will I isolate the curse
But without him I am ever growing worse
And if I could I would put time in reverse
Love would be the only tether we would traverse

I pushed away the only thing that ever mattered
And when he left my soul completely shattered
And now there’s nothing, not even a word
And his silence is the loudest sound I have ever heard

© Delia Ross. 2019

I never wanted to hurt you. I’m sorry.

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Ripples

When your ink drops my soul will splatter
Like a ripple in spacetime, you matter
You are the one my dreams look after
Where reaching you only requires a ladder

When I hear you speak the Sun rises
And my love for you comes in all sizes
Your kiss is the best of all prizes
But your eyes are the best of all horizons

© Delia Ross. 2019

That boy does something to muh. I prefer to focus on the good stuff. Even tho he hates me…

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Graveyard


This maze is full of tears where souls are mostly scarred
From dust til dawn they roam leaving sorrows for regard
Plastic and dead flowers cover most of the yard
Everywhere I turn a zombie roams this graveyard

The living dying are making final rounds
Somewhere in the distance, crying are the sounds
Sooner or later, death will come and visit the towns
Fear of the certain drag the feet with added pounds

Regrets are heavy lingering over this tomb
And forgiveness is on the tongue, I hope it visits soon
Time is of the essence and the Moon is filled with gloom
There’s a place for heaven, but it’s missing from this room

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Words Like Bullets

Where do you go in the dark with my heart
Words fire from my tongue like a bullet from a gun
The damage inaccessible but already done

Where do you go with my broken dreams
Do you savor the sounds of the sorrow they bring
When it comes to being hollow who is the king

Where have you gone with my voice
Give me a list of the roads I should void
You left me in rage, my tongue had no choice

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Evil 101

Tears carve through my sorrow like ice
Cold was his method but precise
Wrong was my soul to sacrifice
Forgiveness an unreachable asking price

Deep is the evil lurking in his core
I’d rather go blind than read anymore
I’d rather go deaf than hear from his whore
I’d rather just die than walk through his door

He got the devil collecting every lie he creates
He got the girls falling for every bait
He got the truth covered by multiple gates
A predator for the young he lures and awaits

I fucking see through all of your masks
A predator, a monster, a narcissist, a liar wherever you bask
Years of denial if anyone were to ever ask
When it comes to being special you fail the task

© Delia Ross. 2019

DON’T YOU FUCKING KNOW WHAT YOU ARE?

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A Visit From Lu Part 7

So there it was, Lu and I
Outstretched his hand an ally
There sat a truce within his eye
Another devil here to apologize

Once you’ve heard one lie you’ve heard them all
You can change the ending but you cannot stop the fall
You can change your perceptions but you’re still behind a wall
The only lies worth spinning are the ones you can’t recall

Lu has been there for me since the day that I was born
When my parents would beat me and my wings could not take form
As if it was his duty to sit with me and mourn
So deep down in the darkness that his feet would come to warn

There are some places angels aren’t meant to be
And it was during my lowest times Lu would come remind me
And it is always a fine line between heaven and hell I am walking
And there’s not a detail overlooked when the devil is talking

But the dark has come again and now Lu has arrived
But these really are his tunnels where we all reside
And even in this darkness my purity has thrived
I wonder if his prayers are the reason I survived

The words hello and goodbye never slip from my tongue
The sorrow feels deeper and long it was hung
The worry will linger where heart took a stung
And with very few words the devil just took a swung…

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Oh my goodness y’all, Lu has been protecting her all of her life until now!?! What did he say to her? Why has he hurt her!?!

I’ve never tried writing like this before, my epic tragedy was written in one night after it came to me in a dream. I had an idea for a story (this one) and wanted to see if I could write a longer piece but I wanted it to be without rules and regulations and I wanted it to feel experimental. I haven’t written any rough drafts or used any of the prewriting techniques we were taught in school. I knew the basis for the story and I wanted it to feel open-world. I dig open world video games (I’m a huge gamer and I’ve been playing games since I was a little girl and it’s one reason I want to play Survivor CBS cuz game play matters and that’s the best game on fucking Earth and I’m getting ready to audition for a fourth time and the first rule of Survivor is never give up). Anyhoo. This has been a huge challenge for me and I can’t believe I’m already into part 7. Sometimes I just want to quit writing cuz I’m nowhere good as the people who admire me the most, even my best isn’t comparable. But I try so hard… in pretty much every aspect of my life. To fail over and over again. But that’s life, failing and getting back up again to fail again. *sigh*

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Dance like nobody’s watching / 119 pounds of sorrow

I was gonna go to the world’s most famous beach and then to a doggy park but it decided to rain and so dancing my blues away to Zeromancer instead in my bedroom, cuz y’all don’t know this good stuff, do you? 4 minutes of me sweating in my bedroom on an early Saturday morning is everything you’ve always wanted to see, right? (By the time the video uploads it’ll be mid afternoon). I have terrible stage fright. And I’m super shy. But this is a Norwegian band that I’ve been digging for quite some time and this is one of my favorite songs by them.

So I’m okay, if anyone was wondering. And by okay I mean, I’m still fighting the good fight. And to be honest, this blog and you guys are my only lifeline. And yeps, you met me at a messy period in my life. And I’ve already had so many give up on me. I’m trying not to give up on me too. And I know my body isn’t in its best shape but does that mean I have to stand behind the curtain because I don’t meet your expectations of perfection. But also, you could have just loved me how I deserved.

Kill your senses
You might be right
Hold your fire
I’ll take you higher
Never drop
We’ll never stop
Tar for feathers
Blood for honey
Milk for money
Isn’t it funny how it hurts
How it hurts
You never see me make
The same mistake twice
You never see a tear
Coming out of these eyes
You never see me beg
For another shot
And you never see me change
Into something I’m not
Famous last words
Stare at someone
You used to know
Laughs at you
Turns around and fade away
If only I could see it that way
Kill your senses
It can’t be right
Isn’t it funny how it hurts
You never see me make
The same mistake twice
You never see a tear
Coming out of these eyes
You never see me quit
See me disengage
And you never see me spit in your face
Out of rage
Famous last words

To everyone who says, “she’s too skinny, she’s too fat, she doesn’t have a body to be wearing that” err kiss off (anyway I just wanted you to see how long my hair is getting, I’ve been growing it out since I left the Army in 2017 after 15 hard years of service plus a war). It’s nearly down to my arse. 🤓
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Lists

Depression worry not
Just divide your time into slots
Write a list of don’ts
Match it with the won’ts
Give the list a plot
Tie it in a knot
Care not where I rot
Then again on second thought
Gotta find that perfect spot
And then maybe it’s worth a shot
I’m a zombie: life and death is a constant postpone
It takes all of my energy just to sit here and moan

© Delia Ross. 2019

Oh my fucking gawdddddd, how many times have you heard, “just make a list” when you are depressed? I’m going to make a list alright and shove it up their fucking ass. I can’t even make a list on how to die. My will is not up to date. I can’t even fucking decide on a way. Or a place. And then, the dog… BUT I digress, somehow, if I just start making lists on things to be done (with dying number one) then my life would be in order, and if I just let God in I wouldn’t be depressed either, so says society. But if I tell my doctors that I want to fucking kill myself, they’ll take everything from me and lock me up in a fucking rubber room. Barbaric are the practices for treating depression. So, since no one can get it fucking right, y’all get to sit back and judge me from behind your screens, and some of you will even poke and prod me and then when I bite you call me crazy and you disappear. And since society has a hard time understanding that being depressed is not the same as being fucking crazy, the death toll continues to rise and I’m trying my hardest to jump on that fucking bandwagon. But, I’m too lazy too sick to even write a list of things to get done. And I don’t think I really want to die, I just want a friend cuz isolation is cold and dark and it’s kinda scary in here and fuck you for not forgiving me for biting you when you caused me to bite in the first place. Shame on you.

  • Get house in order
  • Godparents for pets?
  • Update will
  • Say goodbyes
  • Write letters
  • Pick outfit
  • Method of dying?
  • Location?
  • Famous last words
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A Visit From Lu Part 6

Father of Lies, Angel of Light, Crooked Serpent, Prince of Darkness, Satan, but you can call me Luci;
Now that you are getting to know me.
Antichrist, Beelzebub, Wicked One, there are so many,
Little Horn, King of Babylon, (I can go on), Abaddon, the Devil, the Most Unclean-
Whatever my name, there is another three.

Yet with all these names, so many will not believe
I am a carrier of light, shifting like transparency
The world is full of doubt, a goal I did achieve
It is mostly certain now, I am here to deceive

Temptation is the game, what is it that you envy?
Write out the list, I know the need
Your soul and bones, are full of greed
A buffet of sins, like gluttony

What is it that has you eyed?
How do you sleep at night while your tongue is tied?
Underneath the mask, there is so much pride,
Every word you speak, I know when you lied.

Centuries of fury, casting out your wrath
The demons are many, you haven’t done the math
If you think hell is empty, why did you choose this path?
If you think your hands are clean, from here I see a bloodbath

A sloth rampant with a taste for lust
How easy you pick them out with tongues of trust
And damnation covers your soul in a thick, wicked crust
I watch the irony rush over like a face that is flushed

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 7

A character drawing of Lu, I managed to squeeze in many of the names he goes by, the definition of Lu, as well as the seven deadly sins. Hope you enjoyed…

P.S. I never call Lu by his full name, I don’t know if you have ever picked up on that.

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Probability

The sky shows grey
The air smells of rain
This home is absent any memory
This mind is void of all sensory

There is moon but no champagne
Cold is remorse running in his vein
There is sound but no symphony
There is love but in its infancy

There is patience but he’ll refrain
And forgiveness he might entertain
Silence is my only company
Regret now a probability

© Delia Ross. 2019

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A Visit From Lu Part 5

You will hear me say “fell” but I was chosen for this
The wings on my back come with selfless service
Many call me a hero while acting a servant
I look at hell like it is just a big circus

Fitting in was never for me
I never felt whole completely
I observe with eyes like something is missing
I try to behave while the world acts beastly

I paint white over my wings
I count the hands that take a swing
I pull the wool over my king
I don’t want him to see such things

I try and smile without showing my teeth
I don’t know why people are surprised to find what’s underneath
I rub the doubt which make my wings feel like concrete
And then I look for a direction I can retreat

I remember the day Lu and I first met
It is a night I never will forget
Back then, I had a different mindset
And he will not leave until I settle my debt

Lu has always been there watching over me
Darkening the souls of everyone I need
The lust of humanity is filled with so much greed
I cross a tight rope and darkness I will bleed

I know hell like the back of my hand
I run the same halls of the land that you stand
Some halls go deeper than you can
Some things you aren’t meant to understand

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 6

What, a seventh stanza? This series is out of control! This is what happens when children are allowed to be in charge of things…

Right, so I realized I needed to introduce the characters, our angel here is a warrior who tries to blend in with society but utterly fails. She’s not meant to, but she tries. She’s an outcast who sometimes forgets her worth…

Is there anyone here still with me reading this series!?!

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Excuses

Excuses are the only thing people will proudly show
And if the perception ever shifts, it’s into a direction they never grow
And if you ask them questions they always reply that they don’t know
And if you ask for help they’ll point to a direction you can go

They’ll tell you their mind is open when really it is closed
And when it comes to your life they will be always be brown-nosed
If you peek in their direction you can see their fears exposed
It’s a dog-eat-dog world where sensibility decomposed

© Delia Ross. 2019

You know these types right? They always have their nose in your business? They have your life completely figured out and don’t understand why you don’t? They always look at you with the intent to find fault. And they will even poke and prod you until you bite them and then they scream, “that dog is crazy, it bit me!!!!” Even though the dog is completely tame and loyal and will only bite in self-defense. They always have someone to aid their defense, “yeah, that dog bit her!!!” But the fact is the dog would have never bit if you hadn’t fucked with her… and that is why we have fences so stop jumping my fence and poking me then crying “crazy” when I bite. Grab a mirror, get in the fucking sea already. I don’t have a history of violence or crazy so try again. But, whatever makes you sleep better at night, right? I’ll tell you what makes me fucking sleep, weed. It also helps me not give a shit that you’re such a fucking asshole.

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Grudges

You can change it but then nothing changes except maybe faces if you live through the ages

You can hold grudges but then nothing’s worth shutting out the love she gives when it’s mixed with your ashes

She took all that skin you hid and she turned it into crosses

She prayed for the things that you did and turned it into magic

She drew a bridge over the sorrow and a tunnel through despair to bring you a brighter tomorrow

And though you gave her wings piercing sharp edges

She cut through your night and exposed a boy who’d gone missing

She tiptoed delicately and softly into your heart

Once inside she carved her name into your soul

And it ticks like a chime

And connects to her rhyme

And she’s with you all the time

And now you dream again

And hope is a sun

And day is a chance

And tomorrow is forgiven

For what crime is living

If you can’t have her around

Are you really going to be the stone that takes her down?

How many have you thrown at her now?

Do you line her mistakes up in a formation?

When she crumbles do you feel the vibration?

Does it give you a lot of appreciation?

When she falls do you feel a better man?

She put a dream in your hand

She made you feel something again

And now you wish her to be a better friend?

© Delia Ross. 2019

I just think people’s mistakes aren’t as bad as people make them out to be. Sometimes the innocent fall. Especially when faced with burdens and dilemmas (and often revelations). But the guilty will be the first to cast the stones. History has proved this time and time again… I had things I needed off my chest. I wasn’t going to do a rhyme and then I was and then I wasn’t and that seems to be the flow of the poem. It is what it is…

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Royal Blue

Take me out to that royal blue     
My eyes were always briny for you
Your words would cover my heart with your dew
And open were my eyes to the view

You drew landscapes of us in a sea of love
And navigable rivers my hands had become
And oceans of poetry that fit like a glove
And swollen were hearts on these boats that would come

My breath like wind fell choppy
Passing were rivers of doubt and nothing could stop me
High were the tides of your hope that was never rocky
Straight was the path to your heart, never winding

© Delia Ross. 2019

My heart wants what it wants. It doesn’t understand the who, the what, the when, the why, or the how. It just wants the now. I miss you.

Posted on by poeeternal · 1 Comment

Exiled (Again)

They say I’m crazy but I’m really just a child
And when they act up I start acting wild
And when there’s no attention it only makes me riled
It’s like everyone’s a tribe and I’m the only one exiled

They say I’m crazy but I never did grow up
They don’t call me cougar cuz I’m still a cub or pup
Being an adult just wasn’t in my cup
It only requires nurturing to watch me develop

© Delia Ross. 2019

I’m a flower and if you pour light on me watch how I bloom (you can call me tulip)

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Never

Nothingness matters
Gravity in the darkest seed
Too many hers floating in his seas
Lick the hand where it bleeds
Watch the hate fill the need

His wrongs cancel any good
He’ll lie and tell you I misunderstood
Straight from the pits of Hell to a young girl’s neighborhood
He’s never known integrity anywhere he stood
I’ll never forgive him even if I could

© Delia Ross. 2019

Posted on by poeeternal · 3 Comments

A Visit From Lu Part 4

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 1

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 2

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 3

A Visit From Lu Part 4

I don’t know how but it slipped my mind
And the devil’s first trick was well designed
I guess purgatory belongs to mankind
A week now has passed that I cannot rewind

He checked his watch, it must be a quarter past 3
And it’s been 2 days now he hasn’t heard from me
And for a change he turned on that dusty TV
In hopes to scramble thoughts he had been thinking

And somewhere in that tube the news was all the same
There’s chaos in the streets and the devil is to blame
There’s violence in the feed and no one feels ashamed
Repentance is for souls the devil can’t reclaim

The scientists claim that it is global warming
The bible warned God brought down the flooding
Revelations hint of a second coming
The devil bets the world thinks God is bluffing

He takes a shot of whiskey while changing the channel
The voices mumble ‘there’s nothing we can’t handle’
And now the weather is showing that flights are cancelled
But none of these things can take his mind off his angel

He checks again his computer and phone
He’s tried a hundred times her location is unknown
And he feels the worry sink into his bone
Her last message sent said she wasn’t alone

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 5

Oh my goodness, if you are an atheist, I am in no way trying to convert you and if you are religious this is in no way factual, it’s just fantasy. And if I can get to where I’m going with it, it’s an end of the world love story with themes of angels and devils and humans and whatever other stuffs I dream up. So far there’s at least four characters in the story, if you were to count technology as an entity (the tv voices, clocks/time, etc) and there’s a particular mood and tone and flow I am trying to keep throughout, not to mention I’m attempting this in poetry format, with some 24 lines each chapter/part (6/4). PHEW, IT’S TUFFS. (And I see people get likes on post that say nothing at all but skip giving me any praise for attempting something meaningful). We all run the same halls in hell. Whatev. If you like cool, if you don’t oh well. I still put up effort all the same. 👍✌

*It’s really scary me sharing this stuff, anything I do, I feel raw and exposed and inadequate as is, there’s always that fear of failure, that it isn’t good enough*

Posted on by poeeternal · 13 Comments

Le Vampyre

No vampire balls or masquerades
Depression can last for decades

Why do you leave me but never leave me? Why do you pretend that you don’t need me? Why is it, when I cut you, I start bleeding? Why is it, when you cut me, I start feeding?

Age 410
Ich habe hunger
I’d apologise for being a bitch but…
But these mortals get what they ask for…
These are my classic dracula style fangs, but I have other sets that make me look a monster. Halloween soon. Nosferatu season. Dead like me.
Famished
Feed me
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Carcinogen

Gone but now back again
And by the end of the week
You’ll be missing then
It’s becoming routine
A cycle of ends
And now another peak
Is there ever zen
If honesty were to leak
I needed a friend
So frail and rarely meek
Are these Earthmen
It’s not what I seek
And you are carcinogen

© Delia Ross. 2019

Could use a fag now actually… (do Americans know it’s slang for cigarettes!?!)

Posted on by poeeternal · 21 Comments

Comment Threading

I disabled the comment threading and sorted it by oldest first so now comments should be really easy to post and to read! I couldn’t stand that comment threading bullshit. And to other bloggers who use comment threading, I recommend you disabling it because it’s a pain in the ass just trying to read or respond to your blog post. It took me all of 30 seconds in the settings to sort it. If you need helps, let me know. It’s totally okay to ask me for help.

Also if you come at me with a metaphorical gun, I’m locked and loaded with a metaphorical fucking grenade launcher and basic training in the Army taught me how to use a real one! You might want to think twice about picking a fight with me. I have NO FEELINGS.

P.S. I’m actually one of the sweetest people you can ever meet, just don’t tread on me!

I BITE
FALLEN ANGEL, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?
Yeps
And if you don’t like me, GOOD. GO THE FUCK AWAY
My response when someone doesn’t like me
Back when I hads a cute cut!!! NO FILTER
I ain’t got no time for hoes or bitches, and yes that is a whip in my hand but also no makeups so go easy on me (and fangs of course, again I BITE)
I KNOW MY FUCKING WORTH, DO YOU!?!
NARCISSISM
And I know I have the body and mind of a 15 year old; you don’t have to be a dick about it… and this photo is CURRENT as of the other fucking day
Oh my heart, thank you for looking at me with worth every time and never taking your eyes from me when I’m around. And this here photo was from my birthday in August. These boys keep hurting me and Gavin keeps healing me. And so, peeps are making me feel worthless again and so I needed a reminder. This is Gavin Rossdale of Bush and he saved my life. And still is. Cuz look at how he sees me. Blurry, I care nots. Am loved.
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Twilight

Tuck me into twilight
Let your lips touch my dreams
Your love is the skylight
And hopeful are its streams

The Moon is a spotlight
Where you can find my love every night
And every star in the sky –
The amount of times you made me sigh

I love you through all eternal
I will always be your angel
Unto you I will be faithful
This love is yours to cradle

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Cowardice

Wrap it tight, wrap it snug
Insert love with every word
Never rushed, never slurred
Ensuring messages are always heard

Now take the love and cut in thirds
Put on blinds so eyes are blurred
Gift denial so minds are stirred
Undo connections and act absurd

Destroy the paths, silence preferred
Hide in the dark, act a coward
Give them doubt to march toward
Give them pain where love was stored

© Delia Ross. 2019

Posted on by poeeternal · 1 Comment

Tied To My Love

His love is like an eclipse

Or the highest peak of a mountain range covered in clouds

His love is a wild river overrun

A dry desert now muddy

He has energy like the Northern Lights which flutter in my soul

His grasp is a tether tied to my love

© Delia Ross. 2019

(I want to turn this into a rhyme so badly but…)

Am I suppose to stop loving him? I need answers.