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Hello Farewell

Fairytale or nightmare
Heaven or hell
Common man or devil
This time I can’t tell

Leisure or battle
Sickly not well
Poison or apple
To leave or to dwell

Whole or a sample
Free or for sale
Space or a shackle
Real or a spell

So many I tackle
His shit I can smell
Tongues full of babble
Be quiet or yell

Fist or a grapple
Satin or shell
To flee or to straddle
Correct or misspell

Stand still now or paddle
The boat took a swell
Clear thoughts or to channel
Hello or farewell

© Delia Ross. 2019

Dropped spoken word of this on my Tuners account 👍

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Posted on by poeeternal · 4 Comments

Dead Anyway

Do I ever make you feel good?
Do you focus on the bad, longer than you should?
If you trusted me, could I peek under your hood?
If you don’t love me, do you ever think you could?

Every cloud passing by another prayer
In your thoughts, I wonder, am I there?
Is there ever a moment, where you care?
Of all the ones you’ve loved, how did I compare?

Slipping down now is the rain
Coming down to greet me another pain
Unfamiliar, surrounding terrain
And here I linger, here I dwell, here I remain

Life is just full of decay
I slowly watch love fade to grey
And if I die well I was dead anyway
If I die, that’s just the price we pay

© Delia Ross. 2019

Halloween has passed and still themes of death, oh goodie, I’m still me. Survivor of spells and curses, adding that to my portfolio. Let’s compare resumes. The new modern age of dick comparing. My debt is bigger than yours. Oops, I meant dick, I mean house. Wait, what the fuck are we talking about again? Dick, yes, need. CHOCOLATE, I NEED CHOCOLATE (shut up hormones) ((my ovaries are literally in a knife fight right now, I would apologize but my cycles follow the Moon))

This tho, yasssss HORNY CREEP yeps, not gonna apologize about that either. My drive ain’t hurting nobody. IS YOURS?

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Safehouse

If there is a world where I exist
Please visit
I am a rainbow just waiting to get sunkissed
Like a solar flare my moods can get explicit
But it is through destruction where life has risen
And now you give love a speed limit
And you tie a ribbon of shame around my spirit
You label yourself “critic”
Where once a safehouse requiring no picket
I’d enter, I’d rest, and my dreams were so vivid
I’d cry and I’d dance and I loved you every minute
Your love was a sticky mist
I inhaled all of it (give me a fix)

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Perfect Form

If I were a moon, he’d be an asteroid
If I were open space, he would be the void
If truth were a promise, he would be the lie
If beginnings had beginnings, he would be goodbye

If I were an ocean, he’d be the shark
If reasons had meaning, he’d tear it apart
If weather were gentle, he’d be the eye of a storm
If cold were a shoulder, his would have perfect form

© Delia Ross. 2019

Inspired by something I heard in John Wick 2… had to revisit the entire chapters after watching 3. Neo warming up for The Matrix 4. John Wick 3 is by far the best of the chapters, it just slayed. Martial arts makes me kinda sloppy wet (or maybe that’s just Keanu Reeves, KIDDING chill sheesh) 🙃🙃🙃😛

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What Would Edgar Do?

Dear Edgar, tell me, what is it you would do?
Did your love make you a prisoner, too?
You crafted her poems and she loved you,
But that doesn’t work for me, no matter what I do.

Dear Poe, you were a cryptologist, you can solve this code?
The answer must be hidden, but the window has narrowed.
He keeps his soul hidden, where none have burrowed,
But ever since I found him, time has simply slowed.

© Delia Ross. 2019

I suppose he would die of a drunken, broken heart, naked and broke on the streets. Feels vaguely familiar…

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Graveyard


This maze is full of tears where souls are mostly scarred
From dust til dawn they roam leaving sorrows for regard
Plastic and dead flowers cover most of the yard
Everywhere I turn a zombie roams this graveyard

The living dying are making final rounds
Somewhere in the distance, crying are the sounds
Sooner or later, death will come and visit the towns
Fear of the certain drag the feet with added pounds

Regrets are heavy lingering over this tomb
And forgiveness is on the tongue, I hope it visits soon
Time is of the essence and the Moon is filled with gloom
There’s a place for heaven, but it’s missing from this room

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Grudges

You can change it but then nothing changes except maybe faces if you live through the ages

You can hold grudges but then nothing’s worth shutting out the love she gives when it’s mixed with your ashes

She took all that skin you hid and she turned it into crosses

She prayed for the things that you did and turned it into magic

She drew a bridge over the sorrow and a tunnel through despair to bring you a brighter tomorrow

And though you gave her wings piercing sharp edges

She cut through your night and exposed a boy who’d gone missing

She tiptoed delicately and softly into your heart

Once inside she carved her name into your soul

And it ticks like a chime

And connects to her rhyme

And she’s with you all the time

And now you dream again

And hope is a sun

And day is a chance

And tomorrow is forgiven

For what crime is living

If you can’t have her around

Are you really going to be the stone that takes her down?

How many have you thrown at her now?

Do you line her mistakes up in a formation?

When she crumbles do you feel the vibration?

Does it give you a lot of appreciation?

When she falls do you feel a better man?

She put a dream in your hand

She made you feel something again

And now you wish her to be a better friend?

© Delia Ross. 2019

I just think people’s mistakes aren’t as bad as people make them out to be. Sometimes the innocent fall. Especially when faced with burdens and dilemmas (and often revelations). But the guilty will be the first to cast the stones. History has proved this time and time again… I had things I needed off my chest. I wasn’t going to do a rhyme and then I was and then I wasn’t and that seems to be the flow of the poem. It is what it is…

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A Visit From Lu Part 4

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 1

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 2

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 3

A Visit From Lu Part 4

I don’t know how but it slipped my mind
And the devil’s first trick was well designed
I guess purgatory belongs to mankind
A week now has passed that I cannot rewind

He checked his watch, it must be a quarter past 3
And it’s been 2 days now he hasn’t heard from me
And for a change he turned on that dusty TV
In hopes to scramble thoughts he had been thinking

And somewhere in that tube the news was all the same
There’s chaos in the streets and the devil is to blame
There’s violence in the feed and no one feels ashamed
Repentance is for souls the devil can’t reclaim

The scientists claim that it is global warming
The bible warned God brought down the flooding
Revelations hint of a second coming
The devil bets the world thinks God is bluffing

He takes a shot of whiskey while changing the channel
The voices mumble ‘there’s nothing we can’t handle’
And now the weather is showing that flights are cancelled
But none of these things can take his mind off his angel

He checks again his computer and phone
He’s tried a hundred times her location is unknown
And he feels the worry sink into his bone
Her last message sent said she wasn’t alone

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 5

Oh my goodness, if you are an atheist, I am in no way trying to convert you and if you are religious this is in no way factual, it’s just fantasy. And if I can get to where I’m going with it, it’s an end of the world love story with themes of angels and devils and humans and whatever other stuffs I dream up. So far there’s at least four characters in the story, if you were to count technology as an entity (the tv voices, clocks/time, etc) and there’s a particular mood and tone and flow I am trying to keep throughout, not to mention I’m attempting this in poetry format, with some 24 lines each chapter/part (6/4). PHEW, IT’S TUFFS. (And I see people get likes on post that say nothing at all but skip giving me any praise for attempting something meaningful). We all run the same halls in hell. Whatev. If you like cool, if you don’t oh well. I still put up effort all the same. 👍✌

*It’s really scary me sharing this stuff, anything I do, I feel raw and exposed and inadequate as is, there’s always that fear of failure, that it isn’t good enough*

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Carcinogen

Gone but now back again
And by the end of the week
You’ll be missing then
It’s becoming routine
A cycle of ends
And now another peak
Is there ever zen
If honesty were to leak
I needed a friend
So frail and rarely meek
Are these Earthmen
It’s not what I seek
And you are carcinogen

© Delia Ross. 2019

Could use a fag now actually… (do Americans know it’s slang for cigarettes!?!)

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Cowardice

Wrap it tight, wrap it snug
Insert love with every word
Never rushed, never slurred
Ensuring messages are always heard

Now take the love and cut in thirds
Put on blinds so eyes are blurred
Gift denial so minds are stirred
Undo connections and act absurd

Destroy the paths, silence preferred
Hide in the dark, act a coward
Give them doubt to march toward
Give them pain where love was stored

© Delia Ross. 2019

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The Trouble With Forever

The trouble with forever
It happens rarely ever
They put it in a letter
Then say that it is treasure

The trouble with forever
It happens next to never
They promise you less error
Then leave in stormy weather

The trouble with forever
For worse or for better
At first they give you pleasure
Then the rest is only terror

The trouble with forever
It feels light as a feather
It promises only leisure
But it’s gone once there’s pressure

© Delia Ross. 2019

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A Visit From Lu Part 3

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 1

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 2

A Visit From Lu Part 3

Lu entered my door bringing despair
He had it gift wrapped for extra flair
He covered it in agony to make it look rare
He had a look of concern but I know he didn’t care

So there we were both grinning –
Like in a game of chess but the devil’s always winning
The only hand I play is a joker never sinning
The only life I live is the one I’m never living

As Lu drew nearer he sat upon my table
Like an uninvited guest who should leave but isn’t able
And I am starting to feel very unstable
But my doubt only makes Lu more grateful (and we sat there through April)

Now the window shows that it is winter
And the fear is growing in my center
And all this doubt makes my tongue bitter
The devil got under me without lifting a finger

It’s like if I move a piece I’ll open Pandora’s box
And you know the devil can crawl just watch how he talks
And you know the devil can dance just watch how he walks
And you know the devil is purgatory just watch all the clocks

I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t
Whatever move, Lu will condone
He is a step ahead, anytime I’m wrong
How do you knock a devil off of a throne

To be continued!?!

© Delia Ross. 2019

Oh my goodness, 3 was a challenge! Notice how the devil seems to be moving his way throughout my house/life in this series? The underlining theme in chapter 3 is depression (purgatory). As well as, how we need to be careful about the choices we make in life. I didn’t set out for it to be this way, it’s just how the story developed. I hope you likey (the 5th stanza is my favorite)! 😊

Read: A Visit From Lu Part 4

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Come Back

Come back !!!! WEEKS TURN INTO MONTHS / MONTHS TURN INTO YEARS *falls over in despair*

Come back Come back to me I’ve been waiting here patiently [Repeat] I’ve been walking a thin white line Between love and hate I could use a lil company A lil kindness can go a long way Weeks turn into months Months turn into years Reaching the same conclusions Gathering up the fear Come back Come back to me I’ve been waiting here patiently [Repeat] I’ve been walking a thin white line Between love and hate I could use a little restraint A lil kindness can go a long way Weeks turn into months Months turn into years Reaching the same conclusions Gathering up the fear [Repeat x3] Come back Come back to me I’ve been waiting here patiently Come back Come back to me [Repeat]

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Identity

Ruined! Ruined! He would croon
And sit I would under his Blue Moon
He’d stitch at his identity until noon
And come tomorrow sing a different tune

© Delia Ross. 2019

Essentially, all of our lives we are trying to figure out who we are. We all wear masks, don’t fool yourself. Welcome to ego. Destination: piss poor self-esteem or narcissism. Welcome to the 5th level of hell. It’s really hard to manage your consciousness here or “self”. I hope you brought rum… (and if not, why the fuck is the rum gone!?!)

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Caught Between the Devil

Caught between the devil and the deep blue sea
Caught between dilemma and what you mean to me
Caught between a wrong and caught without my sight
Caught me with my mind when it wasn’t screwed on tight

Caught between the truth and having privacy
But none of these reasons grant you the right to see
Caught between an answer and caught beneath the light
Caught between the bygones and a hand that seems to bite

Caught between an angel and where a devil blew his horn
Caught between the towers falling in an endless mourn
Caught between a moral and caught between a fight
Caught between the will to not end my life tonight

© Delia Ross. 2019

I don’t know if I did that Devil phrase any justice but then I completely changed the rhyme scheme in the end but also many of the end words and then I couldn’t decide on whether to keep going or not… because feelings. And I know I could have carried on the rhyme scheme in the end but, rebel…

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Hunter

Hunting for a future
Hunting for a life
Hunting for a meaning
To not end it tonight

Hunting for a mirror
That doesn’t reflect strife
Searching for an answer
When the question’s never right

Searching for the devil
Under the pale moonlight
Searching for forever
In the middle of a fight

Searching for the handle
Of the blade that’s in my back
Searching for the color
When all I see is black

Searching in my heart
For the love it always lacks
Searching for some shelter
From the endless reign of attacks

Searching for my enemy
In every hand I hold
Searching for some peace
In a land it isn’t sold

Searching for some warmth
In a heart forever cold
Searching for the treasure
But never finding gold

Searching for the best
By bringing out the worst
Searching for the bubbles
To come along and burst

Hunting near the tower
Where she brings out your thirst
Searching in the pages
Of how to stop her curse

Searching in a shadow
Where a truth was still a first
Searching any bottle
Or any woman who can nurse

Searching for the cure
But nothing ever works
Kissing many frogs
But only finding jerks

Searching for an exit
Where it doesn’t ever hurt
Searching for the day
You put in more effort

Searching and hunting
But only gathering dirt
He’s an ocean on an island
And time is the desert

© Delia Ross. 2019

Oh my goodness, kinda long, I hope it wasn’t too boring. I’m sorry my intelligence is that of a child and I can’t lure you in with exotic words and fancy punctuation. I know I’m not enough, I never have been voluptuous in any area. *sigh

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Nightlight

I keep a little nightlight turned on inside me called hope
I allow it to guide me when the dark is too blinding
When my knees are turned in and I am unable to cope
When moments are bleak and I require unwinding

It seems these days are darker than most
You say you understand but you don’t
You say you could help but you won’t
And Depression Isle is my favorite coast

Stability, what a fucking current you are
Ability, like a wave, I might get far
Tranquility, is a rather distant star
Humility, is as visible as a scar

You can find a trail of mistakes behind my depression
And their opinions of me you’ll find are open sessions
And the life I am living they’ll act like they can question
And it’s nearly impossible to form any real kind of connections

So I keep a little light turned on in me called hope
And on days of decline I grip it like rope
And it seems every hour I am on a slope
And it’s hard to believe I am alone on this globe

© Delia Ross. 2019

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CONFUSION FRONT AND CENTER

I placed it in the trash but he said it wasn’t broke
I put it on the shelf then he said it doesn’t work

I offered him a piece but he didn’t take my pie
Yet he doesn’t want me giving it to another guy

Anytime that I move forward there appears another gate
But if I turn around he’s flagging to go straight

I might have said some things that I never meant to say
But he will plead the fifth or look the other way

I tried to read the signs but they’re written in foreign
And even if they were it wouldn’t stop me from adoring

I really wish he liked me but he doesn’t think I’m witty
I don’t fall on the list of girls that he finds pretty

I listened to his reason but it’s confusion front-and-center
And when I said I loved him the season turned to winter

I stumble through the weather like I am a zombie
And watching me break must be his favorite hobby

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Cold Front

I wear his absence like a blanket
And when it comes to understanding I fake it
And his cold front blowing in is just climate
And the winds that haunt this space are now quiet

The gentle summer rains now bring on the hail
And the path to her will lead to the place I fell
And the lakes of love are now frozen underneath my veil
And all the memories he left me were just a tall tale

The grounds are frozen solid where we used to roam
And the heart running wild was captured in his tome
And the girl without the love never found a home
And if summer will come again remains in the unknown

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Feathers

Cold, dark orbits
Just a passenger to his need
Closed windows but still the wind is furious
And racing around every corner you bleed

Sealed off any exits
Like black tar and sticky
Removed any altering
Whores we are worshipping
Coffins as an offering
Death is evermore

Started as something, ended as something else
Destroy the bond, empty the shelf
You took it all, there’s nothing left

Wrong delusion
Precious lunatic
You found my fault line
Every fucking time

And from my pieces
You built a ship
Tested my innocence
Got another taste of it
And delicious is every bit
And I stretch out my finger
As you take another lick
Yummy are the ashes
And broken auras

Lesser are my views
Hearts in a crucifixion
What can you do
Wings of frustration
A different sensation from abuse

Pull your back up friend
Here, I’ll give you a hand
Let’s go higher
I was godsend

Age of rejection
An angel weary and beaten
She collects her feathers
For a potion or a trophy

It doesn’t matter, I’m not well
Down here in hell
I’m saying sorry to the dead
While she collects feathers for her bed
The same bed he will tread

And I hate Earth
Or just my worth…

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Exiled

Take my fears to the lands where they cannot hide
Take the lies to the clouds where I say goodbye
Keep my hope buried deep in his mountainside
Hide my love in the deserts where I cannot confide

Watch my tears grow longer than the Nile
And deep does it go my denial
My doubt standing erectile
Got my shadow in exile

Down here in this maze of lows
The number 0 is what he chose
I swim his river of woes
Like it’s the only direction I’ll ever know

© Delia Ross. 2019

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King of Sorrows

His divine right of suffering
King of the weepings
Destroyer of the weaklings
Master of your feelings
Mirrors on the ceilings
Where doubts keep repeating
And devils roam these evenings
Angels bow for healings
Desperate for his feedings
Mercy stops the bleeding
Will follow where he’s fleeting
His darkness as a greeting
Doom is where he’s leading
Every day keeps repeating
Nothing stops the needing
Where love is now receding
Where I’ve lost my meaning
He’ll never stop my dreaming
An enemy to your pleading
Your crime for ever seeking
The secrets he ain’t leaking
His patience nearly peaking
His angel never speaking
Whatever keeps him grieving
He gives what he’s receiving
Though neither want for leaving

© Delia Ross. 2019

On a whim, had to go freestyle, so many feels…and therapeutic. ✌️

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Eyes Open

Taking the long journey alone
It was quite heavy lifting the stone
But alas it’s done and I’m on my own
And it’s so black, I have lost my home

Is this life or just a tomb
Is there no forgiveness for the things I do
Is there not a seat for me in this room
Is there any reason for the things I assume

Are my eyes open or are they closed
I thought I heard agreement so who opposed
Did the page turn or decompose
Why were the actual risk never disclosed

Is this pain based on reality
Why does it still hurt when I dream
Why do my eyes leak when I bleed
Why am I not anything they ever need

I know I’m not her and I never was
But if you’ll excuse me I need more gauze
It’s going to take a lot to cover the flaws
And every time I fall someone does applause

Every single hour I go through change
But when I turn around everything’s the same
I guess it’s not important to love the strange
And when it comes to me I don’t have a name

I still have love for him on the inside
I said I didn’t need him but I really lied
And there for a moment I felt alive
But it was just a trick of the night

Not even a demon could love this creature
My only goal was to make his life richer
But as it turns out I am just a creeper
And I’m not capable of giving him fever

Now I have this love and don’t know what to do
I thought I was a diamond or in his heart a jewel
I thought he was my knight, come to save me too
But when it comes to my life I had the wrong value

© Delia Ross. 2019

feeling too much
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Truth Comes Hard

Truth came hard like thunder, the sky opened her eyes, flush with rage, she whipped across the night, striking melodies of discord, a witness to betrayal, an immediate downpour of reason, she licks blood from the spear of doubt, her shout echoes into the distant memory of what was, what ever could be, lies dance in ballerina shoes into neverland, but truth comes hard like thunder. I open my gates to her fury, for she is my sister and cry together we did.

© Delia Ross. 2019

Early morning thoughts of truth in my pjs… plus an early morning snap while still sleepy-eyed cuz I wake up like this… messy & honest (it’s a lonely place to be amongst a world of lies).
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Undiscovered

I live in the words of how another sees me
I live inside the bruises of past enemies
Ex-lovers chain me to memories of who I used to be
Held to the past of visions I am now blind to see

Many with offerings of second chances
But none offer a dime to help with my finances
I’ve been under their rule and cancelled the classes
That girl died when I removed her tinted glasses

I had to untangle the worry where it had knotted
I had to prune the weeds where my heart had rotted
I had to learn to dance where my memories were haunted
I had to hug the parts they all said were unwanted

I may be alone but I am not desperate
People may change but I’m still a skeptic
I may be tame but I’m growing restless
I may be weak but I’ve never been helpless

It is true I’ve taken many lovers
My past is filled with several colors
Regrets have visited over many summers
So much wasted time for a love still undiscovered

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Drowning

Do you know what it’s like to cut the cord on your dream?

Though it isn’t just a dream from sleep

But one from awakening

It is a lifeline to your fate

The weight of consequence
Feels like an ocean
As you’re sinking

There are moments you want to swim back up
Fleeting moments of reason
Caught in a net of fishing line

More struggle

No you have to sink deep
Feel the pressure in your chest
The anxiety, the agony, the sorrow

You want to take a deep breath
It would be your very last

Panic. Now regret. Doubt.

Peace will come again.

As soon as my pocket knife cuts this cord
And I race to ascend
The light my friend
A reasonable decision
Air in my lungs again
Pain lessening

You were dead weight.
An anchor in my soul.

I swim towards finality.

I’ve made it to the lighthouse.

You are a memory I drowned away.
And I nearly drowned with it.

You would have been the last thought on my mind.

As you were always on my mind.

Unrequited love.

A pain I hope to never know again.

As I crawl off the shores of a dream that died.

I am never looking back.

© Delia Ross. 2019

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I’m So Scared

I’m so scared for that little girl
Who grew up abused in a broken world
By men who only ever used

Who never taught her love
Or how to be well
No one will care
Unless to get rid of

That little girl now five foot six
It matters not if love exists
For it has never reached her lips
Love serves only as a crucifix

Oh how I cry for her!
To her family a stranger
To the world a number
To death an anchor

I cannot save her though I tried
I must now stop being her guide
For I only seem to make her cry
And make her pain multiply

Oh how I hold her tight!
And squeeze with all my might
Her eyes blind from sight
Her body coiled from fright

She is a desperate, fragile thing
The gentleness of a morning spring
A seed in the dark in need of blooming
She is the breath of an angel singing

Oh how I know her aches!
I know her dreams and her mistakes
I know where her branches break
I know the thunder her cries make

Tiny frail hands always with blessings
Teaching others love was always the lessons
Helping others was always the message
But now it’s time to end the sessions

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Fog

Here comes the dark
Creeping like a serpent
Like a thick, dark fog
It twists as a vine in my heart

She trades sex for love
He follows the current
Laps it like a dog
Ignoring my love above

She visits his dock
Sees behind the curtain
And I a slave or dove
Without a tongue to talk

Here, there, everywhere
She is lurking
Like a black smog
And I an angel without prayer

Eyes that burn with what it sees
Hands that never stop yearning
Tongues reciting the wrong epilogue
One soul left crying on her knees

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Haunting

Baby, why do you hide?
Is there room for me inside?

Baby, why have you run?
Is it something that I’ve done?

Baby, why did you go?
Am I someone you don’t want to know?

Baby, why are we hurting?
Do you feel we’re not worth it?

Baby, why do you fear?
Everything we wanted is finally here.

Baby, I didn’t mean to push you away
Please tell me you’re coming back someday?

Baby, why do you haunt me like a ghost?
When I’m the person who misses you most

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Aligned

You’ll find you’ll hardly make it out alive
You’ll find you’ll hardly make it out in time
You’ll find him hidden inside my rhyme
You’ll find she’s rarely ever cross your mind
You’ll find you can see where you were blind
You’ll know where to find me if so inclined
You’ll find me in jail where my hearts been confined
Though uncoupled we are still aligned
Our souls in orbit just as designed
Cut the ropes to your past and leave all behind

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Sun and Moon

BOOM…
Her noise crashed into existence
An adulterer of daylight
In the eyes of the night a mistress
Still the Sun would chase her with all of his might
Penetrating years to lessen the distance
Every sky diamond flickers white candle light
But ask him of commitment and he’s a terrible witness
He will disappear before the Moon is in sight
His energy expelled before the ink dries from words written
Feeding from his lies as a tiny parasite
Chewing on his poison never seeking his permission
Ignoring red flags as your soul fills with blight
Asking for truth only delivers misinformation
Dancing for love on the back of the night
Keep chasing light despite its resistance

© Delia Ross. 2019

Posted on by poeeternal

Intro

It hurts more than my feelings
It hurts more than my pride
It hurts more than my ego
It hurts more than your lies

It cost more than your freedom
It cost more than my cries
It cost more than your window
It cost more of my time

I live in limbo
While you agonize
I see a hero
You’d never recognize

This is an intro
To a better life
The cost is zero
If you drop the guise

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Netherworld

He’s coming down this road again
With offerings of despair
Wrapped in tears like acid rain
With prayers prayed in vain
Dragging love by a chain
His every action inhumane
His only prize is your pain
His only hope for you to disobey
So he can claim you another day
Purgatory is the way
He’ll keep you bound so you can’t stray
Fill you with doubt so you remain
Enclosed in darkness so you can’t escape
Never asleep but fully awake
Your soul weighed down from the ache
Your every step a mistake
It’ll wrap around you like a snake
Swallow you whole while you decay

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Armor

I know not what drives him
How deep his senses swim
Which fear can make him cower
What eats away his hour
From which tear his pain will flower
Who tells him that he matters
How tall I’ll need a ladder
What brings him to his laughter
Who helps him when he’s sadder
Why his eyes pierce deeper than a dagger
How his words can make me stagger
Or why he wears such heavy armor

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Lived and Learned

I’ve lived through many things
I’ve taken dips in cold springs
I’ve visited lands without any kings
I’ve kissed lips without feeling things

I survived a war which broke my wing
I waited for love they could never bring
I clung to sorrow even though it did sting
I only heard silence from a man who did sing

I have done this and I have done that
I’ve worn kevlar when they wore a hat
I’ve lived in a foxhole, I’ve lived in a flat
I have been skinny and I have been fat

I’ve learned to love in world of hate
My timing is off and I’m always late
I’ve felt a man hold me down with his weight
I spit in the eye of the devils worst trait

There’s not many things that keep me satisfied
I have been honest where others have lied
I have never known love, or been someone’s bride
I’ve been so mad I had to laugh when I cried

I’ve never been worshipped or even adored
I’ve watched other games be unevenly scored
I’d like to release all the fears that I hoard
There are some things that I can never afford

All of these things do not matter that much
I’ve never wanted more than to feel his touch
I want to be his stone and never his crutch
You could call it fate, I’ll never name it such
One thing is certain though I love him a bunch
Anytime he speaks or writes my heart takes a punch

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Warm Linen

I wonder if he writes me words like I do for him
Sometimes I reach out to only find a phantom limb
I’m learning that his desire for me is looking rather slim
There are many girls he likes but I’m not one of them
The spark for life that I once had is dying from within
Still I read his words and take a skinny dip to swim
I run around his sacred words like I am a pilgrim
My soul reacts and knows that he is one in a trillion
He probably doesn’t want it but he left me so smitten
I can feel my orbit gaining speed and spiraling
I still have the hope that he may be listening
And even though he rejected me I hope he is living
He’s so many miles from me it feels like a million
I want to wrap around him like he is warm linen

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Yearning

It’s half-past heartbreak 
The pain grips like a snake
There’s nothing to stop the ache

Once upon a better time
Wasting youth was such a crime
Pride it only cost a dime

It’s long past sorrow
There’s no joy here to borrow
I still pray he calls tomorrow

Third times a charm or so we learn
In slavery until we are adjourned
And so the same ole pages turn
These forty years I only yearn

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Event Horizon

Separate myself
Break myself
Turn into something else
By myself with nothing left
Let the ache manifest
From my head to my chest

How dare it linger and fester
Building gravity in the dark
Gathering more matter
Heavy and hot

No beacon call for distress
No maps to guide on this quest
Alone in silent protest
Not alive nor human nor best
A star too soon compressed
A black hole just like the rest

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Dark Alleyway


He appeared, blue eyes to match his mood
Words delayed but mostly understood
Darkness his dagger and his hood
Carrying a cross longer than one should

And then I followed him, into his alleyway
Despite my better judgment, I followed anyway
Plunged into a world of darkness, it’s been my darkest day
A pool of doubt seems to be the only way 
It’s warmer where he does appear, I feel him like a sunray

© Delia Ross. 2019

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RSVP Declined

Why send an invitation if it’ll just be declined
I want to be seen but I stand with the blind
Every rejection makes me more aligned
I still look confused though I’ve made up my mind
You warned you were bad but you are the worst kind

Oh teacher, oh teacher why’d you leave me blue
Another desertion what more can I do
We barely had started but now we are through
I may have been late but I can’t outrun you
Give me the full movie not just the preview

© Delia Ross. 2019

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Made of Steel

Lay down your guards
I’ll lay down my shield
I’m not here to wound
To punish or kill

Distance can be measured in yards
There is still so much that I haven’t revealed
Place a new bet or just lay down your cards
Everything must be of our own free will

I’ve been getting drunk on the wrong boulevards
Spending time lost, crying and roaming the field
Most of the time I forget to send my regards
Too broken and shattered and trying to heal

Everyone warned me that life would be hard
Your death opened wounds that never have healed
I’m just a gal that most disregards
Or maybe they think we’re all made of steel

© Delia Ross. 2019

Posted on by poeeternal · 1 Comment

My Son Part 2: The Note Beneath His Pillow

“My darling husband, I can’t look at your face,
I made a promise but it went to waste.
The lovely day when we became one,
and the lovely night when we planned our son.
But now I’ve never felt so low before,
I don’t want to look in your eyes anymore.
I saw your pain when you heard the news,
we asked God for another but he must have refused.
And all I wanted was to carry your name,
now I hide my head in shame.
And your face that day in my mind remains;
I’m not even a woman anymore.

The one that I knew could carry my soul,
the one who could shield me from the cold.
You lent me all that you had inside,
I tried to give him to you, you know that I tried.
I saw you crying as I came to,
Losing myself was all I could do.
I never looked right at you again,
I regret it now, since you needed a friend.
And all I wanted was to carry your name,
now I hide my head in shame.
And your face that day in my mind remains;
I’m not even a woman anymore.

And I was wallowing and rolling in the pool of blood,
The Rivers that originated from me would flood.
All I tasted and felt was the death,
of my baby boy who would never have breath.
I cried for you, baby; I cried for you in fright,
Years went by in that one horrid night.
Would we ever be the same? Would we ever smile?
Would I ever get over it? Am I too fragile?
And all I wanted was to carry your name,
now I hide my head in shame.
And your face that day in my mind remains;
I’m not even a woman anymore.

Things are a little more clear now;
there is a sense of peace in the solution I found.
Strange I choose to bathe in blood;
again, it might as well be mud.
And soon I’ll rest in the dirt with the worms,
and never again feel this heart that burns.
I may be letting you down again,
but it’s only one more time, you were my very best friend.
And all I wanted was to carry your name,
now I hide my head in shame.
And your face that day in my mind remains;
I’m not even a woman anymore.”

© Delia Ross. 2010

Stay tuned for: My Son Part 3: Half of Her Life