Eyes Open

Taking the long journey alone
It was quite heavy lifting the stone
But alas it’s done and I’m on my own
And it’s so black, I have lost my home

Is this life or just a tomb
Is there no forgiveness for the things I do
Is there not a seat for me in this room
Is there any reason for the things I assume

Are my eyes open or are they closed
I thought I heard agreement so who opposed
Did the page turn or decompose
Why were the actual risk never disclosed

Is this pain based on reality
Why does it still hurt when I dream
Why do my eyes leak when I bleed
Why am I not anything they ever need

I know I’m not her and I never was
But if you’ll excuse me I need more gauze
It’s going to take a lot to cover the flaws
And every time I fall someone does applause

Every single hour I go through change
But when I turn around everything’s the same
I guess it’s not important to love the strange
And when it comes to me I don’t have a name

I still have love for him on the inside
I said I didn’t need him but I really lied
And there for a moment I felt alive
But it was just a trick of the night

Not even a demon could love this creature
My only goal was to make his life richer
But as it turns out I am just a creeper
And I’m not capable of giving him fever

Now I have this love and don’t know what to do
I thought I was a diamond or in his heart a jewel
I thought he was my knight, come to save me too
But when it comes to my life I had the wrong value

© Delia Ross. 2019

feeling too much

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