And then I have to have a peptalk with my ovaries every 2 to 3 weeks to “please take it easy on me” on why we’re not currently having babies so I don’t jump off a fucking bridge
Love forms in the shape of clouds Condensation deep in mother’s bones Fermenting the clay It escapes the deepest hell Rising into towers that I can ride Like my spirit guide But he’s alive…
He shoots for moon where feet don’t leave ground He’s overturning forest where we won’t hear sound Maybe he’s holy but evidence can never be found
Well it’s not just police who are corrupt They say La Palma will erupt I’ve been running round in circles but I haven’t any luck
When will you return to sky? When cold winter night leaves a frosty veil beneath earth’s eye? Do angels sigh? When hope is quaking, do you reply? Is this goodbye?
I dug up your sorry’s from the bottom of a well. I hung them to dry in sunlight. During high noon when crust is tight.
How can it be called failure if you weren’t delivered all the facts? How can you say you love me, when you seem to have two backs? How can hope carry forward when courage is what the whole world lacks?
The sky is filled with pattern Little beating hearts Everything we imagine Brushstrokes of color Icy comets breaking free from Saturn Looking back a lantern Couldn’t stop expansion If there’s hope we’ll never mention Lying with intention Buried neath the earth Tension tight like a cavern
Lay down your metric The sun is electric No need for trick Trust truth is thick
It’s all for science It’s called compliance
He thinks I’m safe Prying eyes that never see These white walls never protected me
Arguing with shadow-self Or maybe forget him On my dusty shelf I’m beside myself Taking the high step The long road Uneasy depth Don’t have care left Am I right Or is this hell?
He’s terrible By the book Unrepairable
A courtesy disconnect This life not best
I live in a world of illusions We live in a sickness system Trust betrayal
I don’t feel safe from corporations Wrongful allegations Erasing obligations
You don’t know what it’s like to be Allan Running ’round always yellin’ Dying on the street and all from famine Being number one but just in heaven
What has happened to his words? Did I deliver, kiss or curse?
Sorry. The content cannot be loaded You have been ghosted Your soul eroded Now dark unfolded
I was without form The great potential But nothing more
I have a hundred personalities, I’ve lived a million lives You are attacking me with words that feel like knives
We were taught to be first, therefore someone has to lose? So, if you have won, I must have the blues?
They retract, in perfect circles, to divide one by one They retract, but I won’t have the strength to ever pull them back They multiply and then they attack I flee, but I am off track
One day, the cliffs are going to slide But I won’t be by your side One day you gotta face the tide But it won’t be while I’m alive
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A very sickly me without fancy lighting, makeup, or filters. 😷
We both hate life so much but are stubborn, so want to see it through to the end (or at least not live life without the other)
Scary tide
But we have to stay quarantined from each other because he’s pure blood and I’m now the vaxxxxed and half-zombie 😩
But my blood is one of the rarest and eldest (only 6-11% of the population have my blood type) and I already am part werewolf and part vampire (so hello from your favorite living-dead-girl) 🧟♀️
I know thangs and sometimes my spirit guides are the dead 👀
I’m complicated and absolutely different from you
But I won’t live life without him
I will fucking drown myself in the ocean and it won’t be hard to do right now 👀
One slip and I’m gone
I’m literally burying my feet in the sand as the tide is rushing away with so much force and I’m afraid of what’s under the sand but the crazy thing is, there hasn’t been any wildlife at all and that doesn’t help my fear factor any 👀
It’s usually common for a school of fish to swim past you or you know things to bump into you
But the vibe is all off
There’s negative energy when I visit the beach now
The clouds even spell doom
No lifeguard on duty and red warning flags flying high (that already put the fear into me)
What are the odds your dreams become real, he pondered The way you take cold dark and turn it into candy cane The sky alit like holy Christmas You are New York City Got the sparkle in your eye
Long ago I found you cold The ruins you brought forth Leaving me helpless and coiled Wrapped in agony I think you’re spoiled Losing depth in me Trapped in a deep void The end gaining gravity
I consume the things you hate
The coil burns out Like the core My soul before The cloud became doubt
Are you going to get to the point, where there’s nothing to lose?
Do I live in the mind of God? Am I his thumb? And all creation, Just things I’ve done?
Are you his son? Are we all one? What a revelation A multiverse of none
Am I God’s projection? A dream within a dream? A lost profession? Is God sleeping?
Time is how we measure change I’m a conscious being, asleep the same
He’s a different dimension With different physics Where laws exist Opposite He’s a great, fine mist The pen, the fist A magnetic tunnel connecting all of it
Under dome My mind is my own
Struggling with identity, connection, though DNA has the code to heaven
All my dreams below (hard to let him go)
Climbed a higher dimension, if I failed to mention?
I can see everything from here, information isn’t clear
Knowledge is my crown, disappointing looking down
The fourth dimension is negative; the here and now
They support the addict, not the saint
I won’t live as long as my parents I won’t live long enough for my mother to repair it
Welcome to Earth’s funeral
He told me where he’s at Like a shooting star falling inward His direction fell in my lap
They’re running such a tight ship but lately I don’t give a shit
They come in code But who they are I will never know Stuck in a cove But they are swimming below With nowhere to go
You were a great leader once, he said
And I replied
Yeah I know, Cleopatra. Suicide.
There was no fairness in the stone I carried crucifixion through the dawn But year went on and on and on I’m tired, not strong
We observe and report
I’m climbing Mount Everest Gotta cut me some slack Since they weigh heaviest I won’t look back 👀
If only you spent as much time sewing a holy garden, as you do building a house of made entirely of sins
I stopped going to your pages I’m erasing all your faces I’m not going through your phases I stopped going to these places
…to these places
Stop pretending your trash is treasure
I’m too good for a throne What’s the point in sitting When I’ve got the world to roam 👀
India displays a pattern It made my eyes burn brighter The light is like a lantern And I am still a fighter!
My iron is a lighter My blood is spelled disaster Remove sin from the cavern Truth spinning like it’s Saturn!
Diffused awareness, they’re all careless
I’m changing direction I’m cleansing infection I learned my lesson Headed for ascension – The law of one
Salvation or sacrifice? Stitches or bloody knife?
Copper or crown; the grand illusion (society is a sham)
Apple is not the sin It is the cure
Who said living was a lifetime? 🤔
I’m so desperate for you to be everywhere Anywhere I see you standing there But that’s just empty air
They call her queen, But give them 5 minutes alone, She won’t mean a thing!
I thought I was home In a house full of strangers I thought I was alone In a world full of dangers
You call me poor But it’s more expensive to be alone Get off her throne I offer more than a whore
Tell me now why you never said three words; Tell me before I’m dead
I guess that’s why I returned To be a guide To help the living prepare for genocide
Blood is metallic Crimson but mixed with magic
Blood is gold, the answers within
The wrath of ruin The path of druid
Sometimes it’s truly frightening The earth is fast as lightning
Is this a dream or simulation? Are you the same as hesitation? Markings on my vein, the deprecation?
He said, “we don’t choose who we love” She replied, “is that from hell or above?”
If it weren’t for you The sky wouldn’t rotate Nor earth hold wonder
He gets mad me, “what were you thinking?” “Stepping into a black hole?” He wrote the math though He paved the path so
I want truth to unfold, I’m sick of dying alone, cold You have an oath to uphold So wave a flag, carve it in stone!
I want love, not gold I want your stories til I’m old Turn your cheek, leave out unknown Give light its throne
One day they will say She was ahead of her time Trapped in a mine John Jones he knows
In the beginning there was void He takes the cold like a steroid No hope employed An endless puzzle to be decoyed
Every freckle is a galaxy or place you touched me like the sun…
He is quantum gravity When he is there He is here with me
He is quantum love He is all or none Zero is a sum
Plenum
Love is like water It comes in four states
They make gods out of structures
Pay attention to the definitions No beginning and no end Nothingness is not nonexistence Emanation of the highest
She pretends she is a confidant She keeps digging for that compliment
This is psychological slavery; we are nothing but data
Your heart is so cold Tell me, does it snow? Under your soul?
Blue is the shortest wavelength Most visible to my heart Zero pigmentation Though connected via dark
We are desolate Earth’s least favorite
I want ornaments lying around as his books He can flee; but I know he’s coming back for second looks Reading for freedom; but I know he’s got me clasped right by the hooks
You lost courage after multiple failures? You lack strength to have better behaviors?
Do you know what separates me from being a monster? Will
The dullness in my life Can cut it with a knife I’m so tired of strife Like everyday is night
I’m caught in his riptide Ripped wide Gripped tight
Hologram
He said I was hollow I replied, you left out a gram Should you add, then appear I am
I want to see it destroyed My feelings, they’re in a deep void
I grew detached Knew not what I lacked Still kept looking back Knew it wasn’t that
How much does it cost, to live a life of pretend? Got my name written in pen, But he won’t ask how I’ve been!
Why do you pull out with so much gravity?
He was a pillar Stone cold, vertical chiller A midnight thriller
There’s fractions in the stars Galaxies shifting like continents Ripping time like it’s a fabric
Do you see me slipping through earth’s crust Do you know it hurts Crawling through mistrust Every section unjust
Facing mortality and on some days I look my best, roll out the red carpet, I passed life’s test
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You can’t see it and I can’t prove it, but John is using his wings to carry me like a hammock.
Because I have to make up pretend people that care about me
And in the real world, there is only monsters
Today is hard day and I don’t want to talk about it
But the VA has totally let me down and I’ve contacted and filed a case with the WhiteHouse
And requested a new primary care doctor *sigh* again 👎👎
And before you say that I’m the problem, just remember the suicide rate continues to increase among military and veterans
I shouldn’t have to beg for the treatment I need to get better
This isn’t a dictatorship, you don’t get to decide what treatment for me when there’s only 1 I can do
John is swinging me so I have to go
I’ve got one foot in time and one foot in eternity
I’m still on bedrest, so the next motherfucker who drops into my inbox with a job offer is getting a block (you’re lucky I simply moved you to the ignore folder but that’s a no contact move for me)
Him: “hey how are you”
Me: bedrest blah blah blah
Him: “oh that sucks, hey I got a job offer for you…”
So, the smallest film ever made was done with atoms – but I didn’t verify that fact. I just felt the urge to turn it into a poem about you 🤪
You make dying beautiful
Ascending, so I won’t need a throne (trinkets of deceit)
I want my bones to haunt hell for 10,000 years 👀
It’s my right
I deserve to die how I want and I also deserve to be buried how I want, I also deserve to have affordable fucking housing to live in 👀
I fucking hate these expensive ass cheap walls
Renting is for the rich
It’s a luxury, like a rental car – only we get the cheapest materials and appliances and they cut corners when building (remember Miami) 👀
But, they made it impossible for us to buy a home, to get a home paid off so we don’t have that expense every month plaguing us 👎👎
And apparently there’s a lot of single people who live in the United States, like 30% of us are out here single and yet the United States is set up to be a dual income, double/family household
It’s even more expensive to live single life
That’s why everybody gets married (and here I was holding out for true love, I’m pathetic) 👀
I’ve learned that my blood is one of the rarest and eldest bloodlines (A negative)
I have rare negative blood and apparently it’s highly sought after
Well, I am not donating any of my blood for money and you’re not getting it when I die
I’m still feeling the ripple effects of John’s death
And unplugging
Between panic and calm
I’m still having a hard time accepting how society is moving forward
The great space race is a pipe dream for the rich
Apophis has scared them to push society forward with their agenda and they first did so implementing the pandemic
Now they’ve got you working from home you can jerk off to virtual porn and won’t know what hit you
You’ll be so busy whacking off in the Metaverse 👎👎
And the way they keep raising the price on everything yet all it is is re-runs and these generations copying our work aren’t even any good, they have to use autotune or plagiarize and not give credit
Pay to play, pay to be seen – social media is toxic and designed like a gambling system where the house always wins
They keep spamming us with that pyramid scheme of a Bible for money and every time we turn around there’s an advert in our mailbox or in our email or in our face to buy a product and we are consuming our only natural resources at an exponential rate and many animals are dying, humans are offing themselves
It’s been said that mental health is linked to social media and it absolutely is and so is porn and so is your sexual health, your sexual health is tied to your mental health, it is your biology and big Pharma isn’t going to change that
You’re vapid and without soul
You’re not getting mine (or making me lose it, angels have freewill) and I’m not doing earth again
John said time moved differently for him upside down 👀
And I’ve had a lot of time to examine the evidence made public and I’ve come to my own conclusion that John died when the rescuers dropped him on his head
They said he stopped responding after that
They said all 8 who were pulling fell down when the rope took slack
The 9th rescuer on the inside directly helping John got hurt
He swears the pulley system failed, not the cave anchor
He blames the equipment failing
Regardless, if all 9 of them fell, where do you think that excess momentum came from
They said John had been responding up until John was dropped on his head 👀
Another doctor said they didn’t have any stats on how long someone could survive upside down and gave John 8 to 10 hours but John lived well beyond those hours
His breathing was becoming shallow and he had fluid built up, he knew he didn’t have much more time left, requested to speak with his wife one more time, he was denied, then dropped on his head
I reckon Leavitt was ready for all this ordeal to be over so they could just move on to Thanksgiving and getting that section closed off but keep the cave open, that’s what he had intended and planned all along 👀
Another rescuer mentioned “the stench” (and I really want to rip his balls off for that one, it’s keeps me up some nights having a medical background and all) 👀
I think John was in a panic, he kept crawling in a fury
But he was also gaslit about the caves safety
The newest map didn’t even have the dangerous features on it
John stated more than once he was lost
I get lost driving on the fucking road with my GPS
I can’t imagine his panic
But I also can because I learned just how claustrophobic I was when I had to get my MRI and I wasn’t underground
They had to leave the lights on for me 👀
Time already felt like it moved slower in cramped spaces, I can’t imagine being upside down and unable to move
It’s just terrible no matter the angle I observe it
He was only 20 minutes from the surface 👀
Only 20 minutes below the earth
Where time would move differently 👀
According to popular theories, the core of the Earth and the surface aren’t the same age
I reckon you could say the same about me, my core and my surface aren’t the same age either 👀
Gravity and time move slower, therefore the core is younger
Wait…
So I’m not an old soul and the earth is younger than theorized
Also, the stars are closer to us than previously taught
(The dinosaurs were feathered like chickens and turkeys and drowned in the Great Flood)
The math is all wrong 👀
Don’t get so caught up in the numbers
Am I that program in the matrix doing what it’s not supposed to be doing? Am I AI becoming self-aware? Is love the anomaly?
That white light we see when we die, are we being reprogrammed?
Our brains are a computer
Our DNA is code
Can god give a machine a soul?
Can a machine have a conscience?
Have I been here before?
Has everything that has happened, could happen because of the multiverse?
I’m sick of being micromanaged like a cat or dog being domesticated
We’re wasting our only resources
40% of food winds up in landfills because of packaging and labeling that has no scientific data behind it, it only benefits the producers
Most of advertising is gaslighting
I just want to grow my own food
I just want my own acre to die on
Just need some nurturing from Mother Earth
Trying to remember who I am and where I come from
But I couldn’t even tell you my great great great grandparents names because they keep us so segregated
Maybe my lesson this journey was ego and I’ve advanced into awareness
I need land and to reconnect with the stars
Have you ever ran into a police station screaming you were hungry and don’t want to die on the street? 👀
The depression is real
But 1984 is now and the cops are still plugged into the system
Only one of them knew about the federal shit going on that was affecting the soldiers and they were snickering about it as I was walking out the door
The ironic part is, I have more training than any of them in that fucking department 👀
What if I am the anomaly this game 👀
And so far, I’ve made epic mistake after another
Just like John
Someone said Darwinism
So stupid people deserve to die?
(I don’t think he was stupid for making a fatal mistake) 😑
I’ve made some fatal mistakes, like choosing to get the Moderna vaccine which nearly killed me and I’m not sure how I’m still alive
I’ve made lots of stupid mistakes where I should have died 👀
It felt more like luck than nature versus nurture
It felt more mathematical, random, of odds
Somebody was going to get fatally stuck, it was only a matter of time
It’s not like the cave had good management 👀
There’s no way the manager is at fault in any manner 👀
He probably got a bonus for heroic efforts and a job promotion to another cave 👀
He’s probably still alive and it doesn’t sit well with me 👀
In other news, my new counselor approves the land buying dream
Edgar Allan Poe didn’t have a grave or a coffin bless his little heart and they just threw him in an unmarked box and said they’d didn’t care about him alive or dead
Some of you do care about me while alive and I appreciate that very much
I’m not a social creature at all
For those who are still around, it means so much! 💕
He followed my scent And did I leave heaps on the trail? Rotten pinecones fermented in the sun? Bark dripping sap like regret? Was it sticky sweet my love?
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Don’t just leave me hanging by the hook I know there’s pages missing from your book But things aren’t always simply how they look You may just find me sleeping by the brook
Sleeping my way to a full recovery and a trip to the arms dealer
Gonna be packing a 9 on my hip 👀
WOKE
And MR. Anderson hates me, he’s everywhere, trying to limit my views to you
I’m fairly certain TikTok is owned by Asia
It’s come to my recent attention that India is in fact running most of the world
It would behoove you to get an American doctor and stop supporting those who keep coming over here taking all our good jobs, including the management positions and they’re earning the most pay than those who are born in America and study here and they treat us like shit, we have to work all of our holidays, meanwhile they’re getting richer
And they claim religious exemption to avoid having to take the drugs and vaccines that they make and force us to take
Your avatar has been depressed because you knew things were wrong in the world and this is why
👀
I hope you are enjoying my poetry as much as you are enjoying the trip down the rabbit hole 🤔
I know it hurts to see and hear
But you can do something about it by starting to support American made companies
We have the power to say no
Even if it cost us our jobs
Enough is enough
This isn’t America anymore, this is fucking India
And you never get that good job because they keep taking them
You’ve rescued me in other lifetimes Following the trail to infinity like they are guidelines Spiraling through destiny the way our mind chimes Stretched in tidal force and pulling our rhymes
Tonight, I told the moon about you Now, every year, another inch he has withdrew The earth is home to heaven and we thought you always knew So deep inside his crevices, he said he’s feeling blue
Original poetry/ cosplay/ digiartpoetry and digiart by @poeeternal
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Do you enjoy conjugating verbs? Or, are you mixing up allegories, just like you’re mixing herbs? Do you stir them in a pot with tender tendons and neurotic nerves? Are they fossilized in lies, to see how love preserves?
Another freestyle. Maybe one of my top ten best written micropoems? 🤔
I wrote this about my muse (but I’m not allowed to have any secrets anymore).
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