You won’t move an inch if you keep standing still You won’t reach the top from the bottom of a hill You’ve been running in circles just to get a refill You’ve been drinking the bottle but you got love to kill
It did that thang where it published into a draft 👀
Proof I’m stuck in an alternate timeline
So I know that I haven’t told you I loved you in a long time but that’s because I’ve been learning how to hate you but the love spans light-years and you can’t destroy energy 👀
I mean love, you can’t destroy love…
I love you even though you didn’t wish me a happy birthday again
Under a near constant cover of clouds Spending time in the burrows avoiding crowds Thunder is the echo from my heart where he pounds Drowning all our sorrows from these vows
I recently learned from a TikTok that many women have grey hair already in their early 30s (must drink alcohol) and that made me feel hella good to be nearly 43 with not one gray hair!
Should I leave a locket of my hair for you somewhere before I die? 👀
A secret drop off location?
Seems like it would only be fair since I got your book and all 👀
Do you want my pigtails when I die?
Clip clip
Leave in will 👀
I guess the lawyer will have one hell of a time hunting you down 👀
“She wanted you to have this”
Proceeds to hand you two lockets of hair 👀
“Man you sure were hard to find”
👀
Maybe I can leave a little poem buried in my locket 👀
Okay, so in an alternate universe somewhere that fucking happened because that’s how fucking weird I am, I left you a locket of my hair, how creepy, OK bye now
Look at all the dust collecting on the wing Look at all the lessons where we haven’t learned a thing Look at all the voices crying they don’t know to sing Look at all the petty liars bowing for their king
What happened to you, why did you leave? The ocean fills with tears I grieve, I searched for you ’til I found void, I fell for you ‘cuz I’m not poised!
It feels weird to use full on punctuation in my poetry but one of the main reasons I stopped doing it was because someone from another country said it doesn’t translate well in a translator with punctuation and I took that whole heartedly into consideration, secondly poetry is supposed to be freeform and I like to just not use rules because there seems to be a lot of rules for there to not be any… (gaslighting is everywhere huh)
He said he wants to dig deep Experience life behind the angel’s wing Far from heaven’s keep Beneath the iron swing Where the stars can’t breathe
You’re the reason I jumped into this timeline
Careful what you wish for Cuz it won’t come around no more
He’s sitting on a pot of gold Or maybe hinting on impossible He hangs it on a line for me Like his dream’s a possibility
He wants us broken from our roots Then we are wild and loose
He’s like a sudden eruption And the one thing I am always wanting
You’re like hiking a new terrain A secret I can’t contain You are the wind but never rain You move with freedom where I see chain
I keep calling Fickle and thorny Under moon and mourning
I didn’t mean to follow But the lines were yellow And the cries so hollow The flags were screaming hello
160 miles to the end of the world To the end of the world
You were never friend You were never foe Light you only bend Into something unknown Stars can’t comprehend What they’re never shown
My endings must be your first steps
It may be Iceland But he is midnight sun He’s got the world to burn
There’s poison in the water Radiation leaking from the towers There’s too many now in power We are slaves at every hour
Liberty, please free me
Your book got stained By tears of an angel Maybe mangled Hollowed and chained
Hello, where are you?
I want
I want to be
I want to be your hotel
I want to be your gal, your hotel
I want you endlessly, with no sleep
And when the sun should rise
So to my dreams
Look at how time pulls him To the center of my being He is swinging from creation To bring me everything
I buried your book today Six feet betrayed Pages burned with the rage Torn and decayed I spit on the grave So that’s the price you pay
I’m always awake Dreams never come I’ve stood atop of sorrow Cried for all they’ve done
You’re a loser but you get to lose last
He was a stream she followed into a river that flew from November And everything she couldn’t remember Frozen along a seaside where all condemned her A mirage getting nearer
He’s like a long lost love ripe from the vine Picked from the hands of time
He’s the fresh air filtered from hope A twisted tongue untangled from rope A fixed hole in her boat
We need to be more stronger in our courage than our fear
The mood is morbid More dark awarded
Where do days go wasted Dying in the dunes So many words we hasted Watching how light communes
I ripped it right from the spine I never even read a line
A place for two Fit for me or you With just a tiny view Enough to kill the blue
I want to earn So I can spend Bred to consume Until the end Not born with spoon But fed with sand Give me more doom ‘Til world can’t stand
We’ve only ever seen ourselves in reflections or pictures Double dirty mirrors They sell us any sin by preaching the holy scriptures Watching how light flickers But they all have the same figures Endless filthy triggers And the devils’ are getting richer
Oh to be a sunflower instead the weeping willow
He doesn’t mind if I’m awake or doped Love’s the cure no matter the diagnose
He’s definitely not the hero With a population zero
Did you ever care your dreams were stitched to mine? And choice was chosen farther back in time?
An older view but a heart of gold Maybe reckless But I’m dying young
I can feel him tugging like the tide In between serendipity There’s nothing we won’t try
I want you to come first How earth is spinning You should feel thirst
He’s gone but then he’s back He’s super focused, then off track I think it’s over when that ain’t fact It’s never excitement we ever lack
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I’m so deprived and devoid of life, that even if he was a predator, I’d let him eat me! 😩
Or, maybe that’s just suicidal, welp 😩
Helps 😑
He said it’s just fantasy and they all tire of me quickly
Most take one look and run! 😫
I wish the need didn’t feel so real
I need him like air 👀
*dies on street* 😩
Thanks for supporting my blog, OnlyFans, and Patreon! My blog recently hit 80K! You’re the reason I keep going! 💪💪
Once I get back on my feet, I’m gonna be turning my Patreon 18+ and adding a nude tier and making changes to my current tiers! My blog will be getting updated as well! And it’ll feel good to start pushing content and cosplay to my OnlyFans! Thanks for sticking around!
I hope I can start rebounding again soon! Been down over 2 months! 😩
Slowly deleting every app from my phone The ad personalization has been dezoned Buried in the earth somewhere my bone The only destination left is alone
Feeling increasingly paranoid and withdrawn and it’s only 5:43 AM. How’s your day going?
If you’re walking on egg shells, it’s molten around here 👀
In 2019 some Australians decided to go with a tour company hike up a volcano and the tour guide was like “yeah it’s a level two currently” and these people didn’t know anything about volcanoes but the tour guide was like “it’s currently a level 2, level 3 is exploding” and then the Volcano exploded and the rescue helicopter company right next to the tour guide didn’t come pick up any of the hikers on the volcano that was exploding, it was some random helicopter that decided to play rescue and hero and a lot of people died on that volcano 🌋 in 2019, a lot of people died…
It’s basically the Titanic everywhere, and buildings are falling down 3 1/2 hours from me 👀
The tour company took them hiking on a level 2 volcano and the rescue company didn’t come rescue them when the volcano went off 👀
People got burned
People died
The rescue company left them on an erupting volcano
And the mayors and the governors who pretend they give a fuck about us, they’re just playing an acting role
The White Island Volcano eruption – that’s you (the volcano) and me consistently climbing up while you’re erupting
A level 3 volcano and me hop scotching along with the tour guide
👀
But if a tour guide took me on a level two volcano that turned into a level three, he’d probably get kicked into the fucking volcano 👀
I ain’t out there doing tours during an apocalypse tho
I’m not suicidal enough to go hiking up an active volcano tho
But I am homicidal enough to get into fights with the gas station clerk
Yelling at everybody on TikTok who keeps talking about the baby boomers, the millennials, and generation Z and completely ignoring the fact that generation X exist – just like my goddamn childhood – I have no fucking identity 😑
Statistically speaking, I guarantee you there have been more people who have dropped dead by suicide by generation X than of all the generations that have gone before or after
I’d like to see that chart
Suicides per generation
I bet my goddamn life on it that Generation X will have the most deaths via suicide
And I’m not just yelling at them but blocking them
Jesus was pretty angry at the establishment before he died though too
Wanted to do some stuff today – but feeling blockage in the heart – like a blood clot is trying to pass – or it could just be the fact that one of my chambers is enlarged 👀
You made a mockery of my house these bruises vivid Fleeing reason Like lying to the wind Consequences rigid Or maybe gods to blame my wings unfitted Now trapped beneath the cross I’m scorched and livid Did you ever stop to think Your words imprinted Whether I was meant to see Your light emitted Is forgiveness in the tree You were acquitted
Thank you for supporting my new free OnlyFans! I’ll be posting more content soon! Especially because I can no longer post a photo on my blog without paying the steepest price for it!
Got 4 new fans just today!!!!! 🍑🥰🍑
I’ll be livestreaming again this week on Twitch, possibly even this evening!
He leaves me clues confessing They could be lies to keep me guessing There’s trouble around always pressing He’s pouring poison on the gauze I’m here dressing
When he says he’s full But comes back for seconds When he draws a plan But never changes his methods When he’s seen it all But it’s just nightly rejections When he’s looked beneath the stone But worships all imperfections
Can I be the soil under your roots? Or the vine that’s growing our sweetest fruits? Can I be the voice that settles disputes? Can I be the rug you toss your boots?
Why am I fascinated in the shape that light can make? Is it equilibrium or a reflection of mistake? Is it heading towards chances I can never take? Is this really freedom or a cage I have to break?
Lately he’s been sweeping out the cobwebs The devil’s interested in the details He’s focused on the way my story unveils He claims I am the reason that the earth swells
I mean, the world is falling apart, but I still love you.
It’s ridic. Right? 🤔
God created this obsession FYI
And I actually know what a black hole feels like
I actually know what Sagittarius A* feels like
It’s possible that sometimes I am Sagittarius A*
When other girls are talking to you
👀
But like I love this dude and the love has manifested to be real because he bought me pizza 👀
😑
Uhm, so I haven’t lost all my ass or leg progress yet but I feel nowhere near like I’m ready to start fitness again and it’s really scary to be having these kind of heart problems at my age over a fucking vaccination.
If you’re still supporting me even though I am dying and venting on the daily, thank you.
I get called lazy for serving my country and I get called lazy for having an OnlyFans.
Jesus Christ left Mary Magdalene in charge of the gospel and they wiped her from the books and labeled her a whore.
Just like me!!!
They create poor conditions for you to live in and then condemn you for trying to survive.
They fucking condemn you if you try to die by suicide as well.
“No no no you’re not allowed to die like that, it’s a sin”!
Apparently it’s a sin if you lust after somebody else even though that is actually biology
And “a sin” if you try to die because you don’t want to live in this bullshit life
The only thing that is not a sin is giving them money
Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of your money
Was just having a bath thinking how water must be similar to a black hole and vice versa – The Fibonacci sequence – galaxies – how storm clouds on Earth are the same as a gas giant like Jupiter- it’s the same patterns and makeup. Snails. Biology. Poem. 🤓
It’s hard for me to even understand the concept of a black hole but I’m trying to with water.
It drains
👀
So do galaxies.
Where does all that gas stuff go?
The multiverse?
Because I’m believing more and more in a multi-verse than a big bang.
I’ve only just now understood that Jupiter is two times farther away from us than the sun, which is why it looks so tiny.
I thought Jupiter was just smaller but I knew it was far away I just didn’t realize it was that far away
👀
So what they gonna do when they reach another galaxy?
Give them a bible and start the same routine? Burning people at the stake for not believing?
Fear, it’s molecular now innit.
😑
They called Mary Magdalene a whore too and tried to erase her from the books, sound familiar?
I am in the eye of a storm brewing My eyes on the horizon of my choosing Is it an enemy or a friend I am losing Torn pages from books I am removing Broken bottles every avenue I’m now strewing
I wrote the fucking thing but someone else is just going to steal it and then all of their followers are going to leave them the most amazing comments like they’re the best writer ever in the world and they’re gonna all buy each other’s books and support each other 👀
It’s basically the blues and if my daddy would have wanted to love me instead of fuck me I’d probably be playing the harp right now like David Gilmour’s daughter is doing
Not all daddy’s are bad
The grass IS greener
Apparently
👀
But God is also in a band called Pink Floyd
👀
And he sold all his guitars and it’s basically the end of the world
I can see part of his face Haunting me through time I want to memorize his shape Like a spiral on a spine And the colors of his flesh The canvas of divine Takes the pain beneath the breast Gives me hope to align
*The below contains unpopular opinion and language* 🤓
Is it true that trademarks are only recognized in some countries now?
It’s a bold statement to make, it’s just I saw something pop up on a video game about trademarks being recognized in some countries only – or at least, that’s how I perceived it. I seem to read between the lines (or gaslighting).
So the FDA has banned menthol but I could turn myself into a lizard if I want? 🤔
So, I can get a full body lizard tattoo and split my tongue, and get a full sex change operation, I can identify as a carrot BUT it’s illegal to smoke a menthol cigarette? 🤔
Somebody help me the fuck out
I can sew up my pp and chop off my boobs but I can’t smoke a menthol? 🤔
Wait, what.
We can still feed sugar crack to 3 year olds but I can’t smoke a fucking menthol? 🤔
So I can give this god damn sugar crack to recommended age 3+, but I can legally no longer buy a pack of menthol? 🤔
It’s fucking cancer + crack and recommended right there on the package for age 3+
But menthol is fucking banned.
Uhm, okay who is running the fucking country?
Y’all have lost y’all damn mind
I don’t even smoke anymore but on the rare occasion that I do, it’s a fucking menthol.
I just don’t understand the world anymore and I can’t blame it on my brain injury any longer.
I haven’t been voting for any of this shit!
I don’t want my tax money going to NASA!!!!!
In other news, if I die, I’m still gonna be taking my last breath dreaming about you.
Because I like how you lean on my lips and touch my cheeks with your fingertips.
I like the little ways you go above and beyond to show me you care.
I like living off your breath because it’s the nectar of life.
Your kiss.
And all I want before I die.
My cat mask arrived after a bit of a challenge to get it! I’ve had a lot of request to bring back the cat cosplay but I wanted to upgrade to a better mask! I haz done! Hope you like! It’s a spectacular mask!
Getting to do cosplay is my passion and I’m always listening to what you like and I’m always behind the scenes trying to get better, to enhance my makeup skills, my costumes, my wardrobe, my camera skills. All the things.
I love drama and the arts, cosplay is improv time for me!
My workout routine has been halted, but not my diet. 🤢
I’m not quitting my photography, writing, or cosplay.
Though moving now at a snails pace.
I got it from Amazon Prime – a favorite place to shop no doubt. Been shopping there for years. Even bought my Epiphone guitar kit from there. Came with everything, still working good. 🤓
Feeling like I cannot take a breath Or if I do, maybe it will spell death All these tree lines, they have marked my wrath Telling the truth, that’s my only path
Going in for dose 2 of Moderna today against my better judgment. Dose 1 made my blood pressure drop really low, my heart has been struggling to pump blood throughout my body (why I’ve been feeling so cold) because my heart is struggling to circulate (it’s only caring about my main organs) – oh wait – not dying yet. Or am I? 🤔
Not gonna lie, I’m freaking out in the most calm way. Through crying. More stress my petite heart does not need.
I’m scared.
I’m alone.
All alone.
Gonna die naked on the street outta pure madness.
I’m losing me mind.
And my heart is weak.
I just wanted to be somebody’s favorite just once in my life.
PoeEternal 