You only call me every decade You stand with shovel or maybe a spade Confessing sins like something you’ve paid Disappear into sunset from wither you came But love is stronger never decayed
Copyright ยฉ 2025 Delia Ross /@poeeternal. All rights reserved.
I wrote an alternate version on my TikTok. But this is the original draft.
(pโ)
STOP CALLING ME A SIR
STOP CALLING ME A SIR
STOP CALLING ME A SIR
STOP CALLING ME… A SIR
P.S. i have something lying dormant in me. Only it ain’t very dormant. And it’s a lot like cancer.
I don’t have an official diagnosis (you don’t normally get those until you’re stage 4) (I hope you can “hear” my sarcasm over my shame).
52 kilos today.
Like 114.
Still got some teeth and hair. No tiddies. Too tired to put on makeup. I guess that gives people the right to call me a fucking sir.
I LITERALLY FUCKING DARE YOU
SAY MOTHERFUCKER ONE MO TIME
No amount of misgendering me is gonna make me get plastic surgery or botox.
I can’t wait to scare you with my wrinkles.
I wanna live so long that one look at me makes you rethink your entire existence.
Like “what the hell is that” cuz I frequently say it when I look in the mirror at my thinning hair (from the stress or cancer which may or may not be in my control)
I have about 10% of energy at any given time and makeup just isn’t on my to-do-list. But it’s always on my mind. I would even like to try wearing cute wigs.
But I don’t need to attract any more drones overhead.
If I look like I’m dying it’s probably because I am (not in remission yet)
Still fighting for my life ๐
Now might be a good time to call.
Don’t wait another decade
P.S.S. How does one get a burner phone not connected to oneself? Asking for a friend.
You stayed? ๐ I don’t have any good photos right now.
I’ve been unpacking.
STOP CALLING ME A SIR CUZ I AM A PLAIN JANE WITH TINY TIDDIES
I never grew up and it drives HIM insane
I fell out of my bed and got bruised but this doesn’t show the magnitude
Had I been older: “how did she go?” “Fell down”
Told my daughter I need bedrails and to be treated like a child
My shoulder and ankle is a champ for taking the direct impact instead of my head – or hitting in such a way it stops your heart (I already have a heart injury so it was a challenging fall).
This photo was days after the event, at least a week
And my entire shoulder blade turned black and blue.
My head did hit the floor.
My ankle jarred into the metal bed rail and nearly broke
It swelled for three hours and then swelled some more
It wasn’t even 6 AM and I laid on the floor for at least five minutes moaning before I even attempted to get up
Getting older is like becoming a baby again
I NEVER WANNA FALL OUT OF MY BED EVER AGAIN
But had my head been the first thing to hit or the side of my shoulder instead of back – I don’t think my heart would like that
So I spread eagle to slow my fall hoping to grab something – and literally everything on the shelves next to the bed started coming down
INCLUDING A SNOW GLOBE
Which miraculously did not fall on my head
Or break
There’s some tender deep down in there near my ankle bone – but I can finally twist her and twirl and not shit myself
Couldn’t even lean on it on the couch
Ankle and shoulder did good
Saved my life this time
And my bed be high up
No carpet or rug below
Woke up, foggy and disoriented, and went to shift and lean back, thinking I was gonna lay back on my pillow, but instead gravity grabbed me
My life flashed, I spread eagle, and I’m still recovering
And need to baby proof my home
And I had to go to the dentist (I gotta go again)
I forget what we were talking about but he mentioned something about “old” and I said “well what do you consider old” and he said “30” but he didn’t think that I was older than that and none of them ever do
I was driving one day and I let the sun just burn my fucking face and I have this sunspot now
I’m suicidal
The sun imprinted on me
Hell, all I gotta do is dash out to my car and like FRECKLES GALORE
I burn – I don’t tan
Normally, I do things to stop or prevent the burning, but not that day ๏ฟผ
Sometimes I stare at it too (prob don’t rec)
I’m not the brightest crayon in the box and I’ve often wondered why God made me so dumb
I love the feeling when the light goes off (or comes on)
Like when you finally get it
“Oh”
But I’m the kind of person that you have to explain something to in a different way, not by just repeating the same sentence over and over again or saying it louder
Sometimes I can’t hear and I’ll do a “huh” ๏ฟผand they’ll give me the definition instead
Cuz they think I’m dumb
One time I gave the drive-thru employee “too much money” cuz I wanted a ten back – and no change – and it took him a good minute to figure out what was happening
Turns out I wasn’t dumb or scamming him
I was actually making his job easier
But now they’re getting rid of cash
And I still sort my bills all the same
I just counted up my piggy bank
I had been stuffing that bitch
Folded up 20, 10s, and 5s. And silver and single dollars too.
i know you’re there i can feel your shadow watching i’m always awake my finger is a kill switch my divine purpose maybe i’m not a soldier yet until i get my finger wet wrapped around your dying neck i don’t give a heck
Memento mori Placed on shelf A little worry For no one else
Lake of Fire future resident? A personal present? For the ones I love best?
The interstellar texting fees must be astronomical But still you reach out like fading galaxies Or maybe you just want to collide into me Yet always demanding the direction I take While lingering in the fantasy of my wake
Copyright ยฉ 2023 Delia Ross /@poeeternal. All rights reserved.
p.s. photo is current of me and he may have seen a sample but it’s not like it got me any salads or proposals so neener neener
Side-note: If you “don’t want your children to see this” stop letting them loose at Walmart and the Mall. ๐
Psst…
Halloween spider mesh bodysuit by Dolls Kill ๐
Witches Spider Cap by ROMWE on Shein ๐
Both sold out but may restock ๐
One of my favorite new cosplay sets. I feel more myself in this attire and without loads of makeup making it theatrical and whatnot
I’m the real thang ๐
You can’t burn me legally at the stake anymore ๐ป
So just wanted to see what it would feel like to do a midnight Halloween set without all the makeup and flare
I was wearing vegan flavored strawberry kissy lips and that made for an extra sweet midnight smile set (I can hook you up with a free glam bag on Ipsy) (most products are vegan) (cancellation is easy but I’m staying on for awhile) (I got a free Halloween glam kit for sign-up and love it) (you can adjust the frequency of delivery as well) ๐
Halloween is my favorite season perhaps ๐ค
Do you like my new set?
How is my petite pumpkin looking? ๐
“I don’t like your ass when you bend over, it disappears” (something someone said to me in my 20s directly after sex)
Yeah, just like any empathy I ever had for you.
Everyone has had such high standards of how my body should look 24/7 because apparently I’m supposed to be posing 24/7 that I’m afraid to even show my fucking skin because I’ll probably get yelled at for being fucking white anyway
Always told I need to “cover up” cuz they like it too much to “just be friends”
Heaven is empty and I cry a lot lol
I also talk to the dead
I have a budding relationship with John Jones
I also keep having images of him (not John) finding me hanging from a tree
The way he breaks and the strength it takes for him to not look away
To get me down…
I don’t know what’s real anymore
I’m focusing on my blog and OnlyFans for now
I’m sorry I’m not posting more yet on my free one – which I can go live on but I can’t go live on my subscribed one ๐
The way the wheels turn ๐
But I’ve started posting playful sensual videos on my OF
And as long as someone wants to support my content I’ll keep going
WordPress just emailed me telling me that I owe them $100 to keep the blog going but web links are broken and everything is chaotic inside the algorithm since they split it into
I need new web hosting and all sorts of cleanup in my life
My blog continues to remain advertising free
All my content is original
Trends make me feel obsolete and always behind
There’s always someone who can come along and do it better, I’m only ever average at anything even when I give it my all
Self-portrait October 2022 (the timeline is wrong)
We can’t stop tomorrow Falling in the center of all hollow Black hole is sorrow Do you have hope to borrow?
And where I’m crawling narrow Do you really care though? Always chasing pharaoh Name sinner sparrow
I can eat a meal with Abraham Or Gideon Fight the city of Sodom Blindsided with no hand
They call me FALLEN Say my name – Never see me crawling Calling poison pollen
His self-worth Is wrapped in numbers and money Thinks darkness is sunny
Swallowed by sinkhole Earth on cruise control Got my spirit low I live on limestone
Love is a feeble and fragile fire Under denial He will still smile Lie while under trial Claim that he misdialed He’s a pedophile
I’m not interested in validation But more of if today I will eat a salad
Maple Blood of the gods Drink it in gobs Amber makes tongue throb Need it a lot Plot for my crop
He can’t believe he crawled into that hole Based on the lies he was presented His death could’ve been prevented He uses me to speak it
Lives are born and never recorded They are important
If eyes were closed His love disposed His blood runs cold Like death decomposed
The worst of all possible punishment Put it on a monument Pay the earth a compliment Nevermind where heaven went Paid with life and not one cent Left us broke to an extent You think dying’s intimate?
Well my hand was drawn at midnight 13 minutes after bad luck Tiny feet kick through sheet rock I don’t give a fuck
He’s glaring attentive The sun burning incentive He stands with attention Will burn through dissension
Better to be a warrior in a garden, than a gardener in a war That’s my rapport Put it on a flag and let’s explore The garden is what I’m fighting for
Photos from last nights try on session (so casual stuffs)
I’m still rearranging my bedroom and my bed is now on the floor and I gave my neighbor my lazy chair recliner because I’m still getting rid of furniture and might be homeless soon thanks to Black Rock dictatorship
You should’ve kept your mouth shut So deep my wound you felt the cut I guess you’d say you bleed somewhat If you stab in the gut
Sometimes I feel rushed The weight of a feather crushed As long as voice is hushed The praise will gush
I’M ACTUALLY NATIVE AMERICAN BROWN WITH SOME ALBINO AND SUN SPOTS FROM THE SOURCE
I bring you gifts Of all the things you hate Kick you from cliffs And blame you for the weight
You’re a savage and a servant You’re a lion and a lamb Lessons you never learned it And regret You won’t feel a milligram
Are you a gap in reflection? A two way mirror complexion? Can you give me protection? Such priceless affection?
I want to disturb the place you rest Uneasy under crest The earth must love you best Won’t let go your chest
I don’t follow the trends They lead to dead ends!
Long ago I was discarded Does faith keep one safeguarded God is brokenhearted Gone extinct his harvest I cry the hardest
Remove the harness Underneath the carcass Decay just a garnish Layer earth with tarnish We all die regardless
Top of the list huh Right next to “she is dumb” So above and below your thumb Better argument and income That’s the mirror you’re seeing from REMOVED MYSELF FROM THE EQUATION
A GHOSTLY INVASION
I can see through hell’s shadow He’s drinks coffee like espresso I removed self from the status quo I KNOW MY POSITION THOUGH
I’m up, you’re down? Quantum entanglement We wear it like a crown?
My gifts come with all the things he hates Open up these flooded gates Love obviates Nothing he appreciates
Tart Like black cherry Contempt he’ll carry Bag overflowing heavy Sin his sanctuary
P.S. I’m not giving up on the dog. We went for two bike rides yesterday. I finally got the bike out of the house. Most of the black neighbors looked like they wanted to run over me and one white neighbor stopped in his car and warned me that they do 90 around the bend and “be careful”.
I’m not racist I swear. (Everyone hates me for my skin color or my soul. I don’t know which anymore but the city IS dangerous and folks being murdered left and right).
They are targeting the disabled and single white girls. FYI (old people and generally anyone looking weak)
I stitched you into fabric Maybe not elaborate Tiny bit of havoc Maybe out of habit
With some twigs and magic Spilled blood and tragic Wind blown erratic Pages blank but classic
Well now I’ve found the warmth Wrapped up in your world From east to north Stepping back and forth
I have been to hell and back Got the almanac Full sins on attack My wings are carbon black
If photons had a clock The clock would never tick Don’t you question it My love for him It’s just physics
I think he is precious Sun burning contentious Heavy metal pretentious Like moon is reckless Tiny little crevice Will appear speckless Diamond for necklace Can leave lung breathless
How to avoid a road to hell? I think it’s where we fell? Should have gone left? What do you suggest?
He’s got a crown and sword I want to fall on
To die tenderly Kinetic energy Your words – Are haunting me
You will find God if you look lower Crawl feet first but slower Remove bad clover Like a whistleblower
My growth has been stunted Under moon words hunted Why you are confronted All my love abundance Love you in hundreds
Sometimes wounds are gutted Jump in holes redundant Forget the summit Pitched in black no judgment My hope is funded
Through your words I’m blooded Heart beats on like flooded I know what you did Whole world screams forbid Death cannot disconnect our power grid
And if your words are a puddle I’d jump in again and again Don’t care how deep it gets Love you from within
I don’t have anything to offer When he can buy it all A narcissist will not suffer Like an angel will fall
Let him run to Paris! Let him have his fun! My name’s Polaris Like lightning from a gun!
Have you been to the petrified forest in North Dakota? Have I lost my quota?
God made galaxies to be seen The calm and serene The moon and evergreen The sun and me
Full moon tomorrow And I’m all sorrow
Mary Magdalene was a whore Who slept with men for honey Wanted bread, not money What’s to abhor?
The homeless are an invasive species Or so the TV tells me As rent continues skyrocketing The problem aren’t the elites
I’m organic It makes the Devil frantic! Hand stitched by God The Devil cannot stand it!
See the full set on my OnlyFans (thank you so much for your support, as I like food a lot, despite the petite appearance…)
11 hours go by 17 make me cry
Why you take so long to respond to me Takes an eternity
Mercury in Retrograde Not like the softness in my tears The way you disappear Demand both sin and aid! God’s not counting years So the moon will not persuade Though full when he appears With only faith to trade God’s not missing here
The King is a fool Burning his confidant of truth
93 million miles away huh (all photography by @poeeternal)
The next time God sends you something with wings It won’t have feathers Looks like bad weather Be damned is what it means I warn of things
When in doubt Burrow Like a fox Make it thorough
Not going in – is what the sign reads (red flags 101) RIP JOHN JONES
Can we start over? Since we never have before? An open shoulder? Not a closed door?
Father,
I have lost all sense of worth I put in the work Darkness was my crutch Jumping cliff to perch Swearing off the church I know Satan’s lurch Full sin born at birth Decades roaming earth Hell, heaven or hearth
Please save me
Freckles galore – kisses from the source (lots and lots) 9/25/2022 (time is bullshite) (Ethiopia is seven years behind. April Fool’s!!!!!!!!!) Stupid Americans!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I fell like a sword Over propaganda I am abhorred God did not abandon Heart can be restored Faith my companion
He treats me like a number in the crowd He’s a puddle and I can’t get out
I found myself a lost wanderer Surrounded in fear With water creeping near But without wonder Year after year I know I am average I am shrinking here
And now, under moon A ceremonial ego death Hard to draw a breath John Jones go left! I wake up in sweat I lost a brother Maybe the best
I am covered in agony One lifeline to heaven please God is feeding me Gave me life and seed Said get creating Heart has energy Blood is poetry
The earth took my blood Water turned bone to stone Earth is my home!
Earth is lying!!!!!!!
AND I MUST WEEP ALONE!!!!!!!
Tiny raindrops pouring down Your energy speaks volumes There in the Bayou Lies who?
Cutting blood ties With moonstone What could go wrong Hissing with his lies Missing is his tries Left to roam alone
I’m not crawling to my doom I take cover under moon My cloth isn’t costume My favorite color isn’t gloom I’m not chasing after you
The baby likely died last Down in the valley Family finale
I’m aware my artistry is waning like the moon (sometimes thangs are better but I always put full heart in)
I hope there was something you enjoyed and there is more content coming! ๐คช
I got folks coming to my blog telling me to cover up. Last I checked I was a GROWN WOMAN and nudity is NOT A SIN
God made me capable of having children at 13 and I believe I should’ve been allowed to choose a husband while under the age of 18
SOCIETY IS A SCAM
*leaps from bridge*
They want me covered up in jab cuz they can’t control their urges
They teach their children women are to be seen as sex objects only – only nude when servicing man
The guy coming to my blog telling me to cover up is the same guy who supports porn stars and the porn industry and jerks off to porn religiously but then goes to church and drops some money in the tray and thinks everything is OK
Glad he’s enjoying farm life and three meals a day plus infinite snacks
BUT YOU PISSED ON ONE OF GOD’S ANGELS
HE’S TAKING NOTE
I am grateful for your viewship. I shouldn’t have to censor myself on my own blog. It goes against my purpose of full transparency and truthmongering. Sorry not sorry.
“I don’t want my kids to see this”
You mean the same kids you let loose in the mall and at Walmart whom openly sale erotic adult sex toys IN FRONT OF CHILDREN – not behind a curtain ๐
You’d be surprised at how much $5 can lift my spirits and buy me fuel or coffee! If you can’t afford a subscription, please consider a donation or tip! ๐๐๐
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALLOWING ME FREEDOM OF SPEECH ON MY OWN BLOG
You taste of Judas Iscariot Betrayal you’ll marry it I’ve paid twice for sins Won’t pay again
144 awakening 7th seal opening Judgment hour No hoping (John’s still coping)
One, two See through all of you
Hell hath arrived THERE ARE NO GOODBYES
Oh, Princeof This World They aren’t your gifts to give Heaven rules over all but this God is the Void But Satan rules this world
I am a beggar Crawling eternally
Helpless to stop it Remove self from equation The devil is invasion I’m losing patience! Careful crossing occasion Will get stuck persuading Hopeful helpful information
Nature becomes conscious of itself through you
I NEED YOU LIKE ETERNITY Hell is separation I’M BURNING
If I die here Nobody will know I didn’t want to But nobody will ask you
Fallen Angelic Trying to ascend
Need him more and then Eleven hours spent Not bad omen
Number signs godsend I do listen And then repent
Foreshadowing But if he’s dropping flags I’m walking in Red carpet rolling With a halo full of sin God said keep walking But I want him instead
He turns me SOFT Like the Grand Canyon will flow Paradigm shift halo He owns my soul
I’m sorry he betrayed you A devil said to shrewd I think with gratitude The sun burns the moon I rest in solitude Black as blue But oh so devalued
I do not dream of labor The moon a gaper Place our love on paper He calls – I turn to vapor
We’re reaching terminal velocity Death is nearing Is this the correct speed? Thought you needed me?
He’s wrapped up in deceit Like a sheet Am I a ghost I am discreet
I’m without kingdom Guarding eternity Trident I’m not lying
WHAT LIES Beyond the horizon CRIMINAL EYES But the sun’s still rising AND I’M HERE FOR BLOOD
Touch me So the curse will lift Kiss me on the lip Keep me near your hip
More poetry and photography coming! Thank you for your interest in my content! I work hard at it! I hope you are enjoying the Halloween theme! Lingerie bodysuit by Dolls Kills! ๐
I just dropped a set on the OnlyFans! 40 photos! Like when PlayBoy did 18 & 36 page spreads! SAME! ๐คช
I’ve been busy writing and working out! I’ll post behind-the-scenes soon!
It’s BOO season!! ๐๐๐
I’m ready to dawn the Halloween costume daily! I wanna go on a hayride!!!! ๐
All my content is original and I do not use an AI generator to write my poems nor do I scour the web for overused images by others. Sorry not sorry!
In makeup and filter ๐คช
Thank you for your viewship and feedback! Highly appreciated! โค๏ธ
People think people just stand in front of a camera and that’s it, like no, that’s not it, there’s a lot of posing, camera work involved, lighting, makeup, costume, location/scene/mood. Post editing.
Pretty bias exists
“She has it easy”
This is WORK and it comes from WITHIN and it requires ENERGY to produce content worthy of your TIME
I ain’t out here doing anything to disrespect my future husband
People try to shame me for my content because it is taboo ๐คจ
My grandmother was married and having babies at age 15
SOCIETY STOPPED ME AND FORCED ME INTO SLAVERY
I LIKE MAKING PHOTOGRAPHY AND DISCOVERING WHO I AM AS A FEMALE AND NOT A MALE SOLDIER
I’m tired of being in my masculine
I’ll never give up the combat boots or training
But that doesn’t mean you get to shame me out of femininity
I’ve broken into too many pieces to collect And sin he is buried up to his neck
A demon ran past his curfew Patience is a virtue Hard work is what I do Truth is taboo
I misinterpret perception The book of hope is deception Misguided direction Waiting for insurrection
I know I’m headstrong I read the data wrong Hang head low on throne “144” on the headstone
I’m tired of the overrule Narcissism How they always ridicule
The banks block the poor from spending hard money earned Well if you transfer this or transfer that They’ll track every move you got And God forbid you have extra dough You’ll be met with a spending limit yah know!!!
Raw + edited photos on the new OnlyFans! I’m still on the leaderboard! ๐ฅฐ
I dropped a new set last night and I am utilizing the “Story and Hightlight” features as I got/still get penalized a lot by Mark Zuckerberg and at least now I have a safety zone to do drops!
I have lost so much weight from detoxing and my little skirt is a medium and I clearly need a size small now (which is fine) but I was panicked and freaking out because I wanted my hair down and I didn’t do my pigtails and blah blah blah – I can always find a reason why the set could have been better but I received my first tip ๐คฉ
So I stopped beating myself up
I’m getting a rebound session in soon but I want my morning coffee first today
Yep
I drink water all freaking day and all night, let me have a fucking coffee OK, I’m 5 pounds, I’m gonna have a fucking coffee before I work out
I know that sounds different from what people do but I’m doing things different down here in this timeline
I’m so annoyed that somewhere in the world right now the year is seven years back and I want to jump into that fucking timeline and have a baby
My clock is ticking and I keep asking it to chill the fuck out but it is in overdrive ๐คช
I don’t want anyone hurting any children
But I started my period at 13 and I should’ve been allowed to get married by 15 and have 12 babies with my husband the way my grandmother did with hers
Immigration absolutely has been a Trojan horse and I’m fucking horny, deal with it
I’m not out there doing anything to disrespect my potential future husband though and if he’s worried about me stripping to pay my bills or to keep a roof over my head, then he’s too vanilla for me
As far as I’m concerned, the OF is as good as therapy
I get to express my art and not get penalized by the dictatorship out there
They did steal 20% of my tip tho ๐
I AM SO GRATEFUL I GOT A TIP AT ALL
But there will probably be a poem in the future about how the establishment is stealing the tip money of its hard workers
AND I ABSOLUTELY KNOW WHY EDGAR ALL POE DIED
HE NEEDED TO DEBUG
Like apparently the entire population
I already got a load of dishes washing
About to get a coffee going
RELAX
REBOUND
REPEAT
I’m anxious for my LED bike lights to arrive so I’ll probably pump up the tires and make sure everything’s good to go
THE SUMMER HEAT IS NOT GONE
But early morning and late evening bike rides are about to start
You definitely need lights riding in the city and bright colors sometimes isn’t even enough because I’ve been out several times in bright colors and still have almost been ran over several times with one person coming back to acknowledge it and saying “that was really close”
And I was just like “it was my turn” ๐
I’m gonna try leaving the lions den again
It ain’t safe in any capacity
Which is why I am actively boxing and packing mostly the entire rest of my house and trying to get the master bedroom, closet, and bathroom together, so at least have a little apartment area to not go mad
GILLED AND WITH TEETH. PHOTO BY ME FROM THIS VERY AM. ๐คจ
A DISH SERVED COLD ๐คจ
DANGER SHROOMS POTENTIALLY BEWARE (all photography by @poeeternal)
Thank you so much for supporting my content or reading my blog or just being a positive influence in my life overall because I know that I’m toxic and I’m working on that
Rotten fruit falls by itself If you’re compelled Don’t bid farewell
Could you drop good news with the bad? Could you learn happy just means sad? Could you leave but still come back? Or are you ever planning that?
There he goes again Slamming the door! And I still don’t know What we’re fighting for!
Where did your will come from? Was it bought from the sun? What will you become? Is your will firm?
John,
You should have kept your head in the book You should have took a second look You should have chose a different route You should have crossed a bigger chute
I know I’m not what you need That’s why you keep walking away I know I’m not what you bleed That’s why you have nothing to say
Been down a ways Get little praise Been down always Been down always
I made a mess Of these prison walls Out of order The sad owner Of these pitfalls
I am the still of the lake With underwater currents circling The whirlpool in your eye full of hate Forgiveness won’t be surfacing No mercy at the break
Why does weight cause gravity? Like my love for you You will disappear But I am stuck like glue?
Last seen Smoking on the Bayou Got the deep blues Gonna cut loose
Restarted just to leave, Alive just to grieve, Got what you need? Stop bailing on me!
If I could do it all again I’d let you be my influence Blood to pen Influent
Jesus: didn’t you say he left your bed?
Yes.
Jesus: and he won’t share a slice of his bread?
*feather tremble ๐
He slams the door He makes an entrance He begs for more He is relentless
She told me on the phone You weren’t doing good Felt good to my bone You suck at motherhood
I don’t know how we let it get this bad but we did We’ve been in fight or flight mode since a kid
Do you count the times I visit? You and the Devil in business? God as my witness I’ve been acquitted
Love don’t match the physics The rock is livid Are you good at listening? Do you think it’s christening?
Do you even miss me? Feel the hatred crippling? The hours wasting The Devil is your painting
Weapons and fingernail polish Gifts for a goddess?
There’s a river flowing through the ocean That’s where I’m going Omnidirectional I’m never chosen
What am I supposed to do father Sit around and watch in haste I watch the whole world spinning While their soul goes to waste
Murder attached to bad management Let’s call it “an accident” Near the tomb inscribed “very tragic” John Jones would claim it
I’m pretty good at bad decisions There is faith but no ambition The mirror’s not what I envision I wear a cloth but hate religion I’m making friends but not with wisdom Prayer feels like only wishing
I’m still pulling his hair from my creases He’s still putting together his thesis Wrapped up in all of me Until all life ceases
I’m cleaning out my closet I’ve got monsters on the run The walls they’ve got my claws in Digging for the sun
Hit the high ground Don’t want you around But wait don’t go Guess you can leave slow I don’t want you here But you mustn’t leave the show
Taking pride in my belongings Put a reign on the longing
Homes should come with manuals Basic do’s and don’ts – we’re animals
I’m on death number 689832479074357 and still complaining
But I still see no grey hair
Despite being age 500 ish (give or take a century)
I need to accept that I became obsolete to man when I got my period
And I’m alive with a half working heart
You should see my regrets ๐
I like my lines. I earned them. ๐คจ
My hair is in between worlds these days. But I ain’t dying it and haven’t for months. Been detoxing it, stripping it, and then repairs. The dead ends should fix up but it’s a work-in-progress. Don’t touch my hair when I die.
There’s only one guy I even want to have my body and I want him to take care of my body in the afterlife, like I want him to be the gate keeper of my body, he can do what he wants to with my body, I want him to take care of my body and if he brings me back in some digital form then that’s between me and him ๐
I want to donate my body to *you know who* (love of life)
Some people like my nails. I did them. I’m tired. I look dead. I did them anyway.
Am I still fuckable half dead? ๐
Happy Vampire day ๐คช
Gravity has been shaping my boobs
TIME AND GRAVITY
But somebody who ignores me now said he wanted to put a baby in me and fill them up
I wanted that so much ๐
He’s mad at me for having my own place to rent instead of being homeless ๐
I got to feed and meet some alligators yesterday but now I’m upset and crying about it because I don’t like their enclosure and feel like it could be better and then I’m also wondering what they do with the alligators when they get bigger ๐
Because this particular place was not an alligator sanctuary which is what I actually want to visit because Florida is known for having those and rescuing the big boys and naughty ones
I also went to the beach and was blessed with getting to see a family of something swimming in the ocean but suddenly I felt their depression and sadness and started crying and had to leave the ocean
They are sentiment beings
But we do the cruelest things to them for our own pleasure
I got to meet this little gal and name her and I will share that experience soon in a more positive post but I am upset with how they are living
I woke up crying and I don’t understand why I was born if I can’t actually change anything
My excitement about anything quickly turns to disillusionment because reality is so much sicker
And now I was wondering why I was born at all if I can’t enjoy anything the way it is due to narcissism because I’m not a narcissist or a demon and it’s like they have a blue book that they’re using or a color by numbers on every aspect of life and I’m fucking sick of being micromanaged and thought controlled
And the girl working at the front booth was only 17 bless her little heart and she was talking about turning 18 soon, like that was her only goal was to have some more freedom and I didn’t have the heart to disillusion her on the 1st even though she said it was just like any other day and she was right, I was just trying to be positive but my positive energy has quickly faded with the reality of everything
There was some good aspects about it though and I want to focus on those when I do share my post and videos about it
But right now just let me cry
I mean the way those dolphins or whales were swimming in the ocean seemed very depressed to me but maybe that’s just my own projection of everything in the world
I am so sick, I am crying in public now
I go from being really happy and mellow to fucking mad and crying
Do you think this is what Edgar Allan Poe experienced before his end?
Is this why Jesus was like, why are you hitting me, if I did something wrong you could hit me but I didn’t fucking do anything for you to hit me ๐
But he was woke and against the establishment so they crucified him
My goal this year is to spend more time doing the things that I love and animals and nature is something I really love but we’re all slaves and I can’t really change that
I can only blog about it but I don’t want it to deter you from the excitement of the videos and photos that I’m gonna be sharing
It helps to talk about the things that are bothering me deep inside
But I got to name a baby alligator yesterday and that was a pretty amazing experience
I do believe we can petition to make their enclosure better and their environment better
I’m going to visit an alligator sanctuary soon and I may possibly even go to Gatorland in Orlando ๐
There are caverns to visit and lots of things to do outside that I want to participate in
But in small increments because I am still dying
That’s probably why you get burst of happiness and sadness
My only visitor is the sunrise Connected to the earth Eternal blood ties Pretending any moment Could be his blue skies Holding in each breath Before the hope dies
He followed my scent And did I leave heaps on the trail? Rotten pinecones fermented in the sun? Bark dripping sap like regret? Was it sticky sweet my love?
If you appreciate this post and enjoy this blog, liking my content is the easiest way to reward me. Your follows are also appreciated! Thanks for over 80,000 views! ๐
New tiers and new nails potentially! Exciting! ๐ฅฐ
I may go live when I do my nails, on Instagram or my free OnlyFans! ๐ค
I’m trying to get over my stage fright so maybe if I do something like at home beauty care, that will feel a little less intimidating and frightening as say going live and doing spoken word or something theatrical
Baby steps lol
But I am really grateful for all the positive feedback I get everywhere on the stuff that I’m putting out so more stuff coming soon and I’ve never had nails like this!
I don’t intend to wear them for a long time but I do want to do them for cosplay sets!
And I will show you a picture of what they look like once they arrive- if I decide to keep them and put them on my fingers then I will go live for an at home mini salon beauty routine and apply my black goth stiletto nails ๐คฉ
Because, I know you’ve just been dying to watch me apply my nails right ๐
We’re learning stuffs ๐
FYI, back in 2005, I worked in the mall at a salon as a “beauty consultant” for about six months selling products. I wasn’t the actual person who did hair but I knew what products to sell you based on your hair type or skin type and things like that!
I miss working out and I’m putting on some weight but I refuse to wither up and die mad naked on the street ๐
My doctor still has not given me the go ahead to start working out yet and all of my tests have been coming back showing my shit as fucked up so technically I’m still on the bed rest but everything will be happening from my master bedroom
I’m still tired as fuck all the time but the physical pain is less, tho I still have pressure built up in my heart, so I have to be careful (and mostly homebound too)
So appreciate the support, appreciate the feedback, appreciate the views
I’m grateful that I have anybody at all that gives a fuck about me and I do not take that lightly at all
I know I can be isolated but I’m not without gratitude
Excited to get and try new new stiletto nails! Will keep you posted!! ๐คฉ
My monthly door price to now get in (without any discounts applied) is $13! ๐
I love y’all! And I want to keep putting out hot content for you!
When I first got on OnlyFans I was charging $19 to get in my door and some of y’all have been with me the entire time! ๐คฉ
I do not charge anything else once inside! Zero pay-per-view content ever!
Thanks for your support! It keeps the content on my blog ad free! It keeps the fuse lit and the photography sizzling! I’m glad to be alive and have skin that isn’t ice cold! Not dead yet!
I’m grateful to be on the leaderboard and I’m grateful to have your support, this is an ongoing attempt to remain fair in a pandemic and again, I do not charge for Pay-per-view content. All my content is unlocked inside!
Scroll to the bottom to see the unedited NSFW version ๐
It’s likely just my evil sister or ex or one of the alike abusing the algorithm system and finding a way to have it removed out of spite or jealousy so here yah go!!! ๐
I think FaceBook is a dump and the platform is obsolete and he’s trying so hard to stay relevant
It’s a playground for predators and Big Bro is pushing the Illuminati’s agenda of the digital age and selling his crap
I’m getting off the platform for good soon enough
It’s just a back door for advertisers to spy on you
And we gave Mark Zuckerberg permission to tag our faces and now they are using automatic scanning against us
I can’t stand information control
1984 is now
And I’ll be using face tattoos and theatrical makeup in more cosplay sets upcoming just because it’s so very fucking offensive to some and so very appreciated by the rest
It’s actually had a lot of good feedback
Which is why one person out there has their butt hole burning red over my success
It’s eating them alive
So they feel like a big person getting my intellectual property removed in an illegal way (cheating)
But I can’t fucking stand FaceBook and this photo set had positive response on all the other platforms that it’s been posted to so thank you
The entire reason I left android behind is because android was bought out by Facebook and you can’t even uninstall Facebook on android devices now, so that’s why I’m over on Apple!
Mark Zuckerberg has too much control so he can sell you stuff and spy on you 24/7!
If we’re honest, I wish they were filled out with milk ๐
I’m hormonal and wish I were preggo ๐
I don’t feel bad my enemy had a safe for work photo removed as “spam” on FaceDump, so here it is without the edit ๐
And I will be adding some Halloween items to the list very soon!
One item I’ve really been wanting is some wings because I really think that will take my cosplay up to the next level, so I would love to have some wings to include in my photography!
Appreciate the support out there!
Whether it be spoiling me, dropping donations, or subscribing to my Patreon or OnlyFans campaigns, I really appreciate the support!
I ran a lot of people off, I’ve equally lost folks. But many still hang around my social feeds!
But the best way to support my blog and my content, is through subscribing to my campaigns, through donations, or gifts!
Your support keeps my blog free of advertising and spam! It keeps the content incoming! It keeps my belly fed! It keeps the content ad free!!
Stop assuming it’s easy work! I am a starving artist just like Edgar Allan Poe! I have rent (which is twice as high as your mortgage) and student loans and COLA expenses. I don’t live at home with mommy! I pay all my own living costs! I don’t have a husband or boyfriend “paying my way”.
Your support is appreciated more than you know! ๐
If it wasn’t for your love and attention, I would wither up and die! ๐คช
And some of you have supported my campaigns for a very long time!! ๐ฅฐ
You’re better than my therapist! ๐
I also don’t tell my therapist some of the things that I tell you! ๐
Deep dark secrets eh! ๐
Well it is the end of the world and I do love having my own private club! ๐
Thanks for dropping in or for sticking about! ๐๐๐
Some of you say my sets get better and better, I appreciate!
Thanks for keeping me on the leaderboard and from dying naked on the street!
PoeEternal 