22 thoughts on “It’s a good day not to die

  1. I’m trying to be more present these days. Aware of my choices and actions.

    It’s hard when everything in this town is associative. And toxic.

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  2. I know the feeling, and am here whenever you need to talk, I went through a simular thing a little while ago in Oregon, I literally walked to California, Forrest Gump style because of it, not sure if I told you that. I don’t recommend it, it was terrifying.

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  3. Yeah, the whole walking from Oregon to California strategy was not a good one… I was in a delusional state at that point, and was really messed up on drugs.. It will get easier, and things tend to reveal themselves naturally.. if it is happening for me, it can happen for anyone. I thought I would take myself out doing drugs. I am so much happier now, even when it is tough… this is so much better. I know who I am now.. I spent my life till now thinking I had to be someone else.

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  4. Oh, and I was ranting… the right place will reveal itself, things tend to pop up as they should, the universe has a way of unfolding on its own… fortune cookie of Chinese food from Misery. 😉 Or what was Misery and now is a grey land of reflection? Okay.. ranting again..

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  5. When I feel like that, I try to remember which things I like… I am a big fan of the ocean, and then try to take steps, this time not literal to being in a space like that.

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  6. I am allowed to breathe, but I am awkward at breathing because I breathe as two people and live with my family, who are normal.

    I really believe things will get better for you.

    I don’t know why I feel like I know this, maybe because it happened for me.

    I was one of the most miserable people on the planet, and although I, we, whatever you want to call me, myself and I… we are happier now and getting better, and if someone like me can go from being a ranting lunatic who literally wants to break themselves in half and date themselves… I think you will be okay.

    I am ****ing crazy and I am okay, and so is the rest of me, as well.

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  7. I have just been hanging out down there, I didn’t realize I was supposed to get out till recently. I thought hell was all there was. 😉 Trying to make you laugh. I live in hell too, and am in the same process, it is getting easier, that is why I can laugh at myself when I am not screaming at myself or talking about how I want to marry myself…. wow… that sounded ****ing way worse than it did in my head…

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  8. LOL well, I can’t be in the same room as a demon or a human currently.

    They mess with my energy

    Drain me like a black hole

    Do not respect boundaries

    I go crazy after awhile

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  9. I am permanently insane I think, I meant to respond to this 51 minutes ago, but I just spent that time ranting at my ex who I broke up with a year ago. Hahah… I am such an ***hole. People suck and yes they do all of those things. I have learned that it is best to just agree to disagree, which is what I am doing by being alone most of the time, I think everything will work itself in time, due to the inevitability of things changing because they always do, that is what keeps me going.

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