Are the fate of empires? Held in your words? Gated records? That you hurl towards? Like a landlord? Landslides on board? To my own accord? The way we both build rapport? Like you know just what I’m asking for? I couldn’t love you anymore!!!!
I’m looking to buy gold But my soul ain’t sold I’m the cusp of the threshold Like marigold Growing nearing my household It’ll manifold My portfolio Tenfold
I DON’T HAVE A HUSBAND – is going to be my answer for everything
*arrives at heaven’s headquarters
“Did you experience joy”
I DON’T HAVE A HUSBAND
*at the local hitler hospital deathcamps
“Are you feeling suicidal or homicidal today”
I DON’T HAVE A HUSBAND
*at the local coffee shop
“Would you like cream with that”
I DON’T HAVE A HUSBAND
The MRI doc saw me at my worse and noted it wasn’t self-image
After I scolded him for scolding me for making him late for his next appointment with his prostitute (I mean “patient”)
I scolded him for me “not being marriage material” – so I wasn’t worried about making him late
When I don’t even have a husband to go home to…
Caught him trying not to look as I was leaving
All 111 pounds pending surgery (I’m likely not going to get)
I’m gonna start juicing and doing a hardcore regime
When researching, one person beat the odds – but she also had people bringing her vegetables and fruits to encourage her – it took a village – not just her own pocketbook.
Ain’t nobody knocking on my door bringing soup – let alone fresh herbs to juice with so not to die.
I’m getting death threats
(But my doctors do encourage me to stay alive – the male ones anyway)
The females can piss off – they aren’t as smart or empathetic – I hate being under THEIR CARE
HELPS
P.S. don’t try to maintain a schedule – if I pick up on that – I will intentionally make you late lose time/money with the prostitute
I will pick up on it
And now any time he drives to a prostitute, “not marriage material she said”
Some of y’alls addiction’s are costing us
I’m out for revenge
Gonna make you late now everywhere – everyone – everybody
That’s my level of petty
You wanna call the cops on me? Giddyup!
You hate scheduling appointments? Awe. Shame you were such a bitch I’m missing all my classes.
Self help books exist and I can read and do not need a librarian to check out – we got the self checkout system – for once – I can pass go and not pay $200 or look at your face ever again.
I currently can’t contribute to them but I can move them around and they are EARNING intrest
I’m not working currently but I could move them to an outside 401K or IRA
I have them nestled in a “safe” zone and I thought I had drained them and closed them – I had not :p
I had a weird lesson yesterday while waiting on the cops to show up for me – whom never arrived – even after waiting ten minutes in the parking lot – driving off a few blocks – returning and beeping my horn – still no cops – dern.
My future husband may be a cop – and cuffing me would only turn me on – as I’m dead inside with no adrenaline glands to tease me
So please – do as you say you will do – and call
(I did in fact see one turn and head that direction – just like in a video game – I thought – I’m playing real life – the heat is on – retreat.)
But in the games I have adrenaline.
I’m too calm taming the beast.
All these NPC’s getting in the way of my big mission
Cuz I came home and discovered I ain’t broke entirely
I could start the process to withdraw my money – at a 20% taxed penalty.
Or, move my funds into a “high risk” fund.
Maybe start with the smaller account, play around with him first.
I have nearly $12K
One with over 10k (big heart eyes) and one with over 1K (big heart eyes)
Money should make me feel something but it never has
I’m careless spending
I took a loan on it during my transition – thought I pulled it all – apparently I set myself up for success during my fall
AMAZING GOOD GIRL
I do want to take a financial class and I hope my next book I check out will be Americanized and not British – as the book I checked out was all about pounds (it did not say this anywhere on the cover or insert, only in the preface you cunt) – they (the brits) get to sit down on the job – life is different for them – and how they earn thus save. Fuck off, book returned partially read.
I will sign up for free financial assistance – they offer the vets this – fuck us up the ass but say “don’t worry, we offer free advising”
Sign me up
I’m paying attention this time
I still need a husband to manage my finances
I won’t have a husband cuz he’ll message “he’s running late” and I’ll demand a divorce since he’s “seeing a prostitute”
A Skype call will come in 2 minutes later where an entire team will yell “he’s madly in love with you” and he’ll come through the door with chocolate edible roses after the meeting
Since he humiliated me with the Skype call – had me red blushing – the whole office laughing
In 2018 the judge didn’t want to speak to me “until I took three breaths” because “I looked like I was about to jump from the bridge behind us” and I told her my parents didn’t teach me about credit or those kinds of monsters under my bed – she said hers did and she still messed up
But I thought I drained my retirement savings “staying afloat”
BB had on a life jacket apparently
So I called this morning, “I don’t know why I created a new account when there’s no money in it and I can’t do anything with it”
Well, turns out, I do have money – in two accounts – both earning – they can be moved to other funds (some safe, some risky) or moved to an outside 401/IRA.
If I start work again, I can contribute to them (disabled not obsolete)
I could take it all out right now and buy some land or a home
I’m done pawning things and selling things
I have a “savings problem” just like China (it creates inflation)
Monkey see, monkey do
I urge you to start saving too
Let the window clerk quietly quitting give you the fuel you need
Pick up that dirty money on the ground
I may pick up the lost dirty money but I don’t steal tip money you fucking cunt
Let that be the cue you need to quit spending thousands of dollars on weed that don’t work
The audacity
I am not your sanctuary for healing after you’ve committed a bad deed
My soul has boundaries
My thoughts too
I didn’t tell my sister goodbye when she was dying at age 45
So please, call the cops on me after you’ve insulted me multiple times, I will wait
My future husband may be arriving to arrest me
Maybe I will feel something
Uhm, I’m not as broke as I thought I was!?!
I woke up in a different timeline again
Where I have some retirement investments still – despite the Great Economic fall – I had a lifeline
“Life Jackets worn – nobody mourns” HOOAH
I am a wild anomaly
Still might be homeless soon – can’t have a feeling – but definitely be needing that new carpet if I inhabit these grounds another year
Apparently hotel living can cost about as much as a rental each month – but it may include coffee and zero commitment
Now might be a good time to chill out and not get arrested
It’s just, I’m feeling what Edgar felt and responding accordingly
Sure I look like a crazy wild ape, but they need to learn a lesson
God saw what he needed to see
I would have died with thousands of dollars I had completely forgotten about
LAUGHS
What other gold have I hidden in society
It’s been earning me interest all these years
I think it’s important to discuss savings – so many out here struggling for various reasons
I thought I had lost it all
I have over ten thousand dollars in my one fund (not bragging, many years of investing into my fund through hard work) (getting up them early hours) (staying late) (pulling 60/90 hour work weeks)
Working 12 days straight in a row every month – without a day off – for nearly 8 years
And y’all complain when you go a week…
I worked the other weeks in the month too – just with a weekend off or two
I’m exhausted and disabled
But glad you don’t have to worry about quality control or ethics at your job – I’m done supporting society
And you want your tip first – giveme giveme giveme
Fuck you – I’m not tipping you so you can go get a hand job before you even bring me my meal
I tried to shake him off He wouldn’t go He’d only flutter And bop around Organize the clutter Prepare for undertow “I love you” he will mutter In case I didn’t know…
He’s a very clever otter and must have been one in his previous life. He doesn’t mind my storms. He collects the debris to build a stable foundation and home. 🦦
New writing game. Write a poem about my mistakes. Tell the world.
Eminem made a name of himself being a fuck up and Edgar died on the street and I’m somewhere in between of I don’t know what’s next for me
So there’s your theme 🤪
I am dealing with some serious real life issues and it seems the devil enemy has got me surrounded
“I hate it here” John Jones
Hear, hear
All the shops are closed. I’m having a meltdown and they’re enjoying a 3-4 day calendar holiday that they invented
This timeline isn’t real
April fools because 13 months originally
When I realized two weeks ago that the entire world is not on the same calendar and Ethopia is seven years behind….
I sold my TV 📺
I have 8,000 photos scheduled for deletion
My best friend got rid of everything before she offed herself too
I just wanna move…
From this building to another off property and preferably out of city
I know it’s asking a lot when I don’t deserve anything
Or maybe I deserve better things
Than the things people monsters have destroyed
Turns out they look a lot like family and friends
I dunno, they’re all dead to me
I’m trying to ghost Apple
But I’ll likely have a comeback
It’s why I’m fighting for my life
It’s called will
Once you lose your will to survive, the mold will get you
Especially if your foundation was built on a swamp and is ran by an evil Chinese dictator overlord slumlord
GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY, DO NOT PASS GO
If globalism is the reason, the land keeps going up and all the taxes, then please for the love of fucking God, stop immigration
Living in a tent soon (if I’m lucks)
Ohhh tent never used – going in the to be sold at the pawn
One less item to worry with jumping ship
CMON John Jones! We getting da fuck outta here bro!
He ain’t been saving my life in vain….
(If only my therapist knew I was communicating with the dead)
(She knows about the holes in my wall…)
(She understands why the sex toys being sold in front of the children triggers me)
(Cuz I was sexually abused as a child)
(“Oh”) *quietly sobs*
The sins of the Father 🤩
Satan is the Devil ran by an evil Chinese dictator
I mean, I wrote a love poem.
It is the end of the world.
His love is the equivalent of “stopping to smell the bloody roses”.
This is a special Christian thrift store – you can only visit X amount of times to shop
Sitting near the entrance of the store – cookie instructions
But anyone in the world is allowed to shop free there (free shopping, I know it’s weird)
Loaded the Jeep up – all 3 bags from the Thrift shop 🙂
I never know what I will find and there is a 25 item limit each visit. The Jeep was stocked.
One worker said, “I got a bag fresh in if you want it” cuz I had found a cool vintage wicker basket and they thought I’d like this. They were right. In fact, I’ve been looking all over for something but didn’t like the plastic junk currently out there. Universe said “gotcha, know just the thing you need”. Precisely.
Zero holes or tears. Zips correctly and without aggravation (thus far). I think it might be insulated and for kitchen/food use… not what I’ll be using it for. Or will I? 🤔
Also scored a full size Cannon quilt – these thing’s don’t ever run cheap
It’s comfy and making my terribly uncomfortable bed more comfies. It’ll fit the Jeep when I’m homeless again. I already put it through the wash. Need some sheets to match. Love the colors. Not too thick for Florida. Absolutely nothing wrong with it.
Also scored a hardback dictionary from back in the 70s, before the timelime was switched.
A book I’ll understand.
And got this magical purple velvet box with an angel inside – and one of a kind – she’s resting on clouds – but the art is painstakingly done on the inside of the ornament (I mostly wanted the box)
Purple velvet box with special ornament inside
Because it’s glass and has a mirror effect, it’s hard to get a picture of…
She is special and resting on clouds. I don’t know how to get a better photo. All you see is me in the reflection. Inside under her contains this note.
But the wicker basket was a nice find. I mostly cared about the basket.
Inside was three all cotton embroidered Christmas hand towels from Thailand – along with vintage soup with hand drawn art on it. Vintage.
I removed the soap and washed the towels and cleaned up the wicker basket.
100% cotton Christmas embroidered hand towels from Thailand
Vintage art soap from Thailand (my guess is this was also hand painted)
There was also non-edible cinnamon bark with decorations inside with the towels and soap.
Vintage handwoven wicker basket
Got 2 matching sets of 100% all cotton bath towels
And a couple plates
A ceramic spoon holder (now in the wash)
Some clothing like sweaters and nice fancy t-shirts
A small petite robe by Pink
A very long and beautiful crotchet table runner with my small dream home and a tree
Also this paper tablecover and a little Gospel of John propaganda book about the story of God
It’s a special thrift store and can only be visited a certain amount of times.
Anyhoo. The cost is absolutely free and it’s not junk. I’ve been all over town trying to find a bag.
Online too. God hooked me up. Special delivery fresh in. “It just arrived, thought you might like it”. I absolutely did. God bless. I didn’t know I needed a food delivery bag, but hey, have you watched made in heaven yet?
I don’t know if it’s a food delivery bag, but it would work well for picnics and things like that or to put in the back of my Jeep in the trunk area and put items in it like groceries
You could store blankets and things in it. Love my wicker basket and black travel bag! Absolutely great to store the groceries to and from! If that’s what I’ll use it for…
Mikey didn’t know what to do with the shovel. I’m in a similar boat.
I have things part of my purpose that I haven’t sorted yet.
I don’t know how to store and organize the important things.
Got 3 important boxes. All varying sizes. Velvet and satin lining. Wicker woven. Black potentially insulated. Do I keep the ornament and box together?
I thought that little wicker basket would be great to store my pads and tampons in, but surely there’s a better use for it than that…
Already washed and put out… love that all my towels and blankets are cotton! (Synthetic fibers are highly flammable and hard to put out)
Check out Frog Ministry of Edgewater, Florida (free to anyone in the world – but you get X amount of visits) 🎄
The special Christmas lingerie sets I was picking out on Shein was SELLING OUT as I was attempting to load my cart up and shop
And there were other things I was shopping for. Sunshades for my Jeep (dashboard and steering wheel), cleaning rags, regular clothing, and special Christmas stuff (got a hat, socks, satin night cami) + silicone moisturizing socks for the feet (baby soft) 🛼
BUT THE BIG TICKET ITEM I WANTED WAS SELLING OUT. All I’d do is blink and another was sold. 🎄
I WAS LIKE – COULD YOU SAVE ONE FOR ME
Now I know I’m not a busty 10 star but damn I’m an original so that makes have value thank you. I’m here. Deal with it. Plus this is my first time ever shopping for Christmas lingerie. I got a good tip.
I got some really cool Christmas leggings if they fit me and a really cool crop top to wear to events or to go skating in (it’s versatile)
There was a skirt from a favorite designer and I bought the last one potentially. The same designer I scored my Halloween spider witches hat, to be buried in. 🤪
But the big ticket Christmas special lingerie outfit was selling out!!! I wanted it!
IT DID IN FACT SALE OUT (I got a set coming) 🎄
So shopping hour was over!!!! Time to checkout! 🤪
SOON COMING 🎄
And I got it, in a small, and I hope it will fit! I hope I didn’t spoil the fucking surprise
I hope you like the special lingerie set that I got and it’s incoming, I’ll have a shipping status soon!
I’m glad I was able to budget in the big ticket items because I really wanted those but I had to put some stuff back because the other stuff started selling out! 🤪
My wishlist is growing full. But I’m not just buying lingerie. 🎄
I’ll probably wear that little satin Cami nightgown all through December and January (well it’ll get washed, but you know what I mean, sleep gown)
I like the quality and price of Shein. Shipping is never as long as it estimates – unless you get hit with a category 5 hurricane – that will set you back.
I really hope those black Christmas leggings fit because they remind me of Greese and I can go skating in them (you know the movie right)
I think it was John Travolta’s first film
If they fit, they will look good with my black and gold skates, and I busted out my measurements.
28 inch waist currently, 117 pounds 👀
Shoe size 6 1/2 – 7 (sometimes a 6)
34B (sometimes 36C unless lactating) (then like DD) 🤪
STOP PICKING ON ME
My mini tree is out and first ornament I ever made in kindergarten (school is slavery)
I got a new lace veil today at Spirit Halloween but would you know they were out of their infamous bleeding candles here and at every store nearby! Sold out! So wasn’t able to score another pair, nor will they have any at the huge after Halloween blowout sales lol
New lace comb veil (because she kept poison in the comb and this is a black comb lace veil) MINE
I got a military discount today and will likely sneak back and see what the vultures left behind for the huge blowout sale
Box of tricks from Spirit Halloween 😈
But I still have one candle unburned and one that I just lit for a set that is still more than half (and now they feel even more special for the set I’ll use them since I wasn’t able to score any replacements this season. Boo)
Sometimes I score tee-shirts (plain but black or green or some other color but 100% cotton or near)
New lunchbox from Spirit Halloween
I really wanna save my dough for Dolls Kill and Shein – see what I can grab there this time – got my trick or treat shopping in early tho at Spirit – and with that military discount – but dammnit if they didn’t have the ONE THING I WANTED and really no point in going back but I know I will 👻
I do like grabbing the journals and the home stuff at discounted prices and I did score a really cool lunchbox that includes a poem 🎃
I can use it when I take my walks to the beach and park or travel wherever OR as a keepsake box or to store my gun in 🙃
It’s practical and my first real lunchbox since a kid that doesn’t look like I’m going to work or a hike. But remember when lunchboxes would have really cool things inside them (kind of like vinyl records).
😈
Oh and I got a new skull for the bookshelf 💀
And my military discount paid for those decals but I don’t know if I can use them in any of the photo sets on onlyfans because we’re not allowed to use blood, or say the word blood, or bleeding, so I don’t know if I can have bloody handprints even though they’re decals 💀
I can use them to decorate my Jeep tho or a wall or put it on forever furniture – I DON’T KNOW
I HORDE THINGS LIKE A SQUIRREL
I WAS INVITED TO A HALLOWEEN EVENT THAT INCLUDES PRIZES AND A SMALL MEAL
I RSVPD
I HOPE I GO 🎃
(Please go)
(I’ll let you know if I go)
(Free food even if I win nothing I won a free meal and I wanna get invited to the bigger Jeep events on beachside on Main Street when ONLY JEEPS ARE ALLOWED TO DRIVE ON IT
I’m trying to be a positive part of my community
My little Jeep is old and it could win a free part but I’m not decorating it but if I go – I could go in a costume, maybe I might win something for it or myself, but still free small meal) (networking)
(It requires communication and I’m an introvert so I probably won’t go)
Or go but not leave my ride 👻
Also more writing and stuff to come
My poetry is so fresh it normally comes with mistakes (no editor). ☠️
Yo. I mean, I have more content coming. But I make everything hot. 🤪
I don’t use a poem generator.
I don’t have a husband who could be my poem generator (like David Gilmour and his wife write lyrics together, I don’t have that)
I made Dark chocolate cupcakes with dark chocolate “tombs” and decorated them with Halloween cake rings (that can be worn)
Cake ring decorations
I’m still detoxing so am not using icing (I think that stuff is overrated)
My cake was experimental
Cake decoration (not a ring)
The cake is vegetarian cuz I used 3 brown eggs, unsweetened applesauce (about half a cup), coconut oil, pumpkin seeds, blanched and whole almonds, rolled oats, flax seed, and love 💕
Started off with 2 eggs but needed a third
It started with two brown eggs but I needed 1 more (or more applesauce so the egg won since I ate too much of the applesauce) 🤪
I did not want the batter dry because I was gonna add all the other ingredients and I had zero guidebook cookbook for the RECENTLY NEAR DECEASED
But I experimented by adding nuts, seeds, and oats
A semi-healthy Halloween treat that would have been good with some instant coffee tossed in the batter (next time)
Flax for the gut health
And I made a cake too
Raw cupcake batter
I was gonna share with the neighbors but naw
I should have sprinkled it with oats before tossing in the oven (next time)
Turned the whole house smelling good
I’m gonna enjoy with coffee over breakfast and/or treat time
Decoration isn’t my thing but A for effort?
And they actually do taste good which is why I wanna be greedy 🎃
Happy Boo season 👻
Uhm check the current census for a scare 👀
I used broken dark chocolate bits as the “tombs” 👻
Sidenote: some sort of non cancerous marshmallow could be used as spider webbing and edible decoration
I’m just throwing out ideas
If you make it better, show me
I don’t have a mama or daddy or brother or hubby
K, thanx, bye
HAPPY HALLOWEEN 🎃
P.S. If you have those little spiders – the black and orange ones that hang on your Halloween decorations – you can use those for your cakes – but please don’t eat your wearable cake decorations – get photos in them instead or actually share the cupcakes and let folks keep the Halloween jewelry (or ask for them back) 🤪
Let me know if you liked my idea or if it gave you any good ideas for treats of your own
I think some cute edible spider webbing would have been the spooky sweet perfection around the chocolate tombs (which could be a tad bigger and these are 70% and 90% dark chocolate bits)
70% & 90% dark chocolate broken bits (used with coffee and as cupcake “tombs”
You could carve initials or dates into the edible tombs for extra spooky vibes and put small white chocolate drizzle near the tombs as spider webbing
Side-note: If you “don’t want your children to see this” stop letting them loose at Walmart and the Mall. 💀
Psst…
Halloween spider mesh bodysuit by Dolls Kill 💀
Witches Spider Cap by ROMWE on Shein 😈
Both sold out but may restock 🎃
One of my favorite new cosplay sets. I feel more myself in this attire and without loads of makeup making it theatrical and whatnot
I’m the real thang 🎃
You can’t burn me legally at the stake anymore 👻
So just wanted to see what it would feel like to do a midnight Halloween set without all the makeup and flare
I was wearing vegan flavored strawberry kissy lips and that made for an extra sweet midnight smile set (I can hook you up with a free glam bag on Ipsy) (most products are vegan) (cancellation is easy but I’m staying on for awhile) (I got a free Halloween glam kit for sign-up and love it) (you can adjust the frequency of delivery as well) 🎃
Halloween is my favorite season perhaps 🤔
Do you like my new set?
How is my petite pumpkin looking? 👀
“I don’t like your ass when you bend over, it disappears” (something someone said to me in my 20s directly after sex)
Yeah, just like any empathy I ever had for you.
Everyone has had such high standards of how my body should look 24/7 because apparently I’m supposed to be posing 24/7 that I’m afraid to even show my fucking skin because I’ll probably get yelled at for being fucking white anyway
Always told I need to “cover up” cuz they like it too much to “just be friends”
Heaven is empty and I cry a lot lol
I also talk to the dead
I have a budding relationship with John Jones
I also keep having images of him (not John) finding me hanging from a tree
The way he breaks and the strength it takes for him to not look away
To get me down…
I don’t know what’s real anymore
I’m focusing on my blog and OnlyFans for now
I’m sorry I’m not posting more yet on my free one – which I can go live on but I can’t go live on my subscribed one 😑
The way the wheels turn 💀
But I’ve started posting playful sensual videos on my OF
And as long as someone wants to support my content I’ll keep going
WordPress just emailed me telling me that I owe them $100 to keep the blog going but web links are broken and everything is chaotic inside the algorithm since they split it into
I need new web hosting and all sorts of cleanup in my life
My blog continues to remain advertising free
All my content is original
Trends make me feel obsolete and always behind
There’s always someone who can come along and do it better, I’m only ever average at anything even when I give it my all
Self-portrait October 2022 (the timeline is wrong)
Soups, stews, treats, and pepper sauce – all made from scratch and with love
Memaw always said heat the vinegar to extract “the heat” from the pepper
Measure out what you need in the jar, then heat to a simmer and remove from heat and pour over your peppers (you can leave them whole but remove the stems)
Slowly pour the vinegar over the peppers and set aside and let them cool and then put them in the fridge and forget about them for at least two weeks
The longer they sit in the fridge the hotter they will be and you can top up the vinegar by adding more hot vinegar to the peppers as it diminishes
I’ll eventually eat the peppers too but memaw said they are good for at least one year in the fridge – I’m gonna need a bigger jar 🤪
Currently I’m making stew with green cabbage
Fresh vegetables and herbs 🌿
It’s been simmering ten thousand years and I’m investing in a bigger pot soon
I also recently made spicy pasta
It was tasty and I’ll try different versions soon
Lots of fresh tomatoes, herbs, and peppers 🌶 🫑
Fresh garlic, olive oil, onions….
Tomatoes, more tomatoes, and a small tin of organic tomato sauce
I was out of penne pasta but had whole wheat spaghetti but used bow-tie noodles instead
I also added 3 bean trio cuz protein (it’s good)
Overall, my experimental spicy pasta was a hit (could make minor changes) (more garlic too)
And then, there’s the oatmeal peanut butter protein balls
Take 1 cup of peanut butter (a good one) and gently mix over low heat with 1 cup of maple syrup (a good one)
Once it has a light bubble – remove from heat (takes maybe 2-3 minutes) (maybe 5)
Add 1 cup of rolled oats by gently folding
I added flax and raw pumpkin seed to the mix – cuz tis the season 🎃
Put them in a better cooling tray and set in the fridge until they harden – then put in a storage container – these protein balls make around 2 1/2 dozen and could last you two weeks in the fridge but mine never go past 1 week
I could have used more oats cuz they were kinda sticky this time. Full of protein, vegan, and organic. That’s all for now. Gotta get back to the pot on the stove… 🤪
FYI the wind was so gnarly I had to stand with my feet shoulder with apart, leaning into the wind battering me to death AND it required TWO HANDS just to hold my device
I was getting blown away and he was taking dips like a bird
Sidestepping a hurricane
And the way the bird kept rhythm with him entering the ocean
Not a sign of doom
GLADIATOR DUDE
I want him on my team for the apocalypse
Let’s feed him good
💪
He conquered something because his step was getting more powerful the closer in
STOMPING THE STORM
I’m terrified of the ocean calm so this was kind of incredible to see
He didn’t seem drunk, more determined
STUPID COURAGEOUS (oxymoron!?!)
He woke
And he definitely pissed off
SEA MONSTER CONQUERED SOMETHING TODAY
His fears? 🌀
I could barely stand and the wind nearly blew my Jeep door off
GUSTY
Also, I met a one legged bird and nearly wept
And an outcast because weak
But that seabird was so strong 😑
Sad but strong
Struggling to survive with one leg 😑
Now I’m gonna cry again 😑
The one legged bird and gladiator vibes at the beach today
It’s never dull even when it’s dull
Because people were complaining about the live lmao
Not all but some
🤪
Most enjoyed getting to see the fury but I can’t do anything about the sound quality
I have taken the feedback from my prior sets and invested in some additional things that I can’t wait to arrive –
I’d like to give you a sneak peek on one thing that I scored – which was probably the biggest ticket item for the best price – and I was willing to starve next month for them…
And before I show you – don’t have doubt about the boot style – I am a Soldier and could wear this to an actual event without killing my precious feet – I could wear these into battle potentially – I thought they’d look good with a school skirt or lingerie. I thought maybe I could be buried in them. I thought maybe they were worth missing a meal next month. And, at less than $8 a boot, it was still less than the rotten eggs and milk that Peggy’s Discount Health Food store sold me on Monday….
Should I cancel the order? 🤪
In the wishlist… 👇
In the Dolls Kill wishlist 🎃
They just put out this Halloween costume (which I think is better than the one that I did get – but Every day is Halloween)
This costume includes the headband, the pentagram bra, the gloves, and the skirt with attached devil’s tail (not the tights)
And I will absolutely fucking cry if it sells out before I can purchase it but I’m tapped out for the month 🤪
I did score some really good stuff for the Labor Day sale though because I’m an excellent bargain hunter and I’m still throwing away clothes in my closet and throughout my home that are size medium and large (boys T-shirts with holes in them and business attire uniforms)
So grateful to share my makeover progress with you
THE THIGH HIGH BOOTS ARE VEGAN 🤩
I’ve been extremely busy in the real world but I’ve also been writing poetry and I do plan to get another set out to you before I release the poetry
I’ll show you one more surprise from the shopping makeover (and please note I’m paying thrift store prices or less for brand new items)
THIS WAS NEARLY SOLD OUT ON SHEIN
COMING SOON
(I picked up other Daddy cosplay stuff but don’t want to spoil the good surprise)
I would just like to add that I’ve never had a makeover in my life or got to dress pretty
All the men prior in my life body shamed me
I wore oversized baggy clothing and kept my head down 😑
I’m grateful for your readership and feedback and support
It’s all being invested back into my blog and photography and thank you for being patient with me while I get content out to you
I’ve been writing lots of poetry in between paying the bills and doc appointments
Getting rebound sessions in when the heart allows
DETOXING DETOXING DETOXING
I’ll be glad when I can turn the dating sign back on 🤪
Do you think my potential future husband would take me to the altar immediately to marry me if I opened the door up wearing those boots and a school skirt?
I NEED TO KNOW
My feet shouldn’t have to hurt to look amazing – so really hope you like em!!! My first vegan thigh highs!!!!!!!!!!! And R-E-D 🎃
CAN’T WAIT TO USE THE PRETTY MAKEUP – THANK YOU AGAIN FOR THE GIFT 🎁
I scored the curtains for under $8!! I really wanted that set!! Cheaper than Walmarttoo and absolutely cuter (and gothy)
I got a Halloween costume from the new Halloween section on Dolls Kill for 80% off 😍
The curtains and the costume!! 👁👄👁
And a lace bodysuit (my first) ☺️
But that wasn’t all
BARGAIN HUNTER
Was able to pick up accessories like thigh high socks, jewelry, daddy cosplay attire, and other thangs
I spent the $3 extra for the 3-5 day delivery
They get your order out so much quicker
Or you can wait two weeks for them to mail your stuff out to you or pay the three dollars extra and they’ll get it mailed out to you within 3 to 5 days
I love the secret and flash sales! 🤩
Stuff goes so quickly
I saw they had the valentine set back up and I was going to go ahead and get another set because it was $.96 and I thought what the fuck I haven’t received my first set but I’ll go ahead and get those and double it since they’re only $.96 and I’ll be damned if those bitches weren’t already sold out…
I really hope y’all let me mail you some snail mail
I’m excited to get that Mixed Messages card set, especially knowing how popular it is ☺️
But my set will be arriving any day, they already shipped
I got them for a good price but not under $1
I think the mixed messages would be fun to mail out for Halloween Thanksgiving Christmas and all the way up through Valentine’s so I’m not waiting months or however long it is
Hopefully somebody will let me mail them a card to their work or wherever!! 🥰
Anyhoo
There’s enough to go around
Trying to send some despairing cheer
I got some Daddy cosplay stuff with the tip money 🤪
Goth BB will be making a future appearance
Especially since spooky season is here
And I used that tip money to buy my Halloween costume from my favorite store!!!!! Thank you!!!
I’m buying size small which feels really weird because I have not been a small since I was probably 17
And this is my first time in my life ever buying lingerie
I don’t want to show you the costume, you just have to wait!!
It was originally $60 but I got it 80% off for their labor day sale + a mystery code!!! Extra bonus discount!!!!!!
I’d love to celebrate Halloween this year and go on a haunted hayride but I’d get kidnapped especially in that costume
I have guys who follow me out to my vehicle in my little shorts with no make up on and I don’t have a fucking filter on when I walk outside
It’s dangerous where I live especially for a gal like me
He was scanning the parking lot…
His truck was big…
Anyhoo
Maybe I’ll just stay home and take photos for you 🤪
I’m excited!!!
I have a Halloween costume and I really wanna show you the daddy cosplay stuff but I can’t, I can’t show you yet, I can’t fucking show you yet
I’m not dropping anything about it in my story
Sorry
Halloween feels like Christmas
And BB wants to look cute for you
Maybe a lethal doll
DOLLS KILL (let the neighbors know)
😋
Should I show you?
I really wanna show you 🤪
Well I got the curtains and you know the curtains I wanted to get and I do think I got a good deal for them and everybody needs fucking curtains
I have no curtains in my apartment
I’ve lived here for five years without any fucking curtains, if anybody is giving me shit for spending less than eight dollars for some fucking curtains right now, you just need to go away with your negative energy, these are for my master bedroom privacy
I made a tip and I spent it
I invested it in myself and my art and mental health
WITH YOU IN MIND
You inspire me
And I got the rent paid
I still need to go grocery shopping so I didn’t spend that much money over there and again I used my tip money
I’m not gonna stop sharing my life experience just because I’m over there working now
God wants me to have a husband
I ain’t out here doing anything to disrespect him
I don’t have a man but you know I’m out here, I’m out here doing the hard work for him to fucking destroy my self-esteem and tell me I have no value
I would have married him at 12…
He tells me his secrets then punishes me 😑
He hasn’t spoke to me in weeks 😑
He’s got another girl 😑
She probably does dirty things for him 😑
He makes me regret being born 😑
But ordered my first bodysuit and the regret is less
Plus my first proper Halloween costume in years
God said it was OK if I spent my tip money on myself
GOD LOVES MY IMAGINATION
And the child in me was not compromised or tainted
God says I’m special, not broken
And all the things I feel are part of being human
There’s good nature and bad nature
Sometimes we make mistakes but when you acknowledge something that doesn’t suit your soul purpose and you stop doing those things, that makes you human not a demon
Waking up was part of my journey and it has taken me so long…
Can’t quit now
The Devil trying hard to get me…
But he can’t have me and I got a cute Halloween costume to mock him instead 😈
Halloween is my favorite season I think
I’m pretty certain I was burned at the stake in a past life
Also, there are ways in which I never want to die
“Haven’t you died 12,000 ways”
“I ain’t going that way, the answer is still no…”
Prime example:
Nope. Leaving that convo between me and God
Ain’t putting it in the ether…
FLORIDA IS KNOWN FOR THEM THO
Fuck it
SINKHOLE
The earth just opens up and swallows you
This guy was in his bed sleeping or jerking off and it was the only place in his entire house that went under and now that whole area is condemned with a fucking piece of plastic do not enter tape line
My fears about dying are starting to get irrational and I already have a therapist so I need a husband…
I got some thigh high socks to combat the fears
That red satin bow set was my first
And now I’ve got another set incoming soon
All these years and never wore socks over the knees and now I don’t wanna stop
I love you 💕
I wanna dress cute for you
Deadly but cute
DANGER CANDY LIKE THE SHROOMS
Sometimes good, sometimes bad 🤪
I just need a husband to sort me
But I’m absolutely grateful for your viewership
You keep me going
The tip did not go for something bad (like alcohol or gambling)
I’ve never had a makeover in my life!!!!!!!
I’m glad I can share it with you
xoxo
(Could you let him know I need him)
I CAN’T BREATHE WITHOUT HIM
He released feel good hormones when I was dying
That’s why John wanted one more phone call
But he was denied 😑
He lost all hope 😑
But I’m not gonna jump from the bridge because I’ve got shit coming but the gang is out and about and they’re probably going to taunt me again tonight so I probably won’t get any fucking sleep tonight either
Where the fuck can I ride my bike with my LED lights and not feel like I’m gonna get murdered???
CUZ THE BIRTHDAY LED SETS ARE ON THE WAY
I even got a wall butterfly!!!!!!!!!!!! LED!!
And I’m gonna burn this grey shower curtain from Walmart
Or put a bunch of old oversized clothes in it and roll it up and make it look like a body and toss some of my cosplay blood on it and take it to the dump as the kids are off to school
I don’t think it’s normal to be having these ideas or laughing the way I do 🤨
I just let the entire medicinal shop know that the Daytona Beach gang was after me but that the universe was speaking to me right now with this song and that y’all are the dumbest criminals ever
THEY WERE ALL SMILING
And then I started feeding off of that energy and bouncing up and down
THE STAFF WAS SMILING
I even said I was going to do a TikTok video with this song dedicated to you
I stated that
YOU WILL NEED A RESTRAINING ORDER TO STOP ME
Cause-and-effect
HAVE FUN
And I’m already skipping up and down the sidewalk with this playing on repeat
Just checking my mail skipping
Just taking my dog for a pee
Minding my own business
I hope the gaslighting is working
The vehicles have mirrors
I can hear you breathe
GET OFF MY DICK
🖕
*skips*
*smiles*
*song on repeat any time I leave the house*
The devil has an invite to bust my fucking door down I double fucking triple dare you to fucking bust my goddamn doors down bust my fucking doors down cross my motherfucking shadow do it fucking do it you little fucking piss ants that will never amount to anything and you’re never coming to heaven with me I fucking dare you to fucking cross my shadow
IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD AND I FEEL FINE
Let the love of my life know I’m nearly healed
I might let him near me in the future for a hug
I threw a glass Coke bottle at his head once a long time ago but I knew he wasn’t gonna move so I put a slight spin on the bottle right at the very end
Getting on the rebounder soon and then sharing some new outfits of my own
I have things from my birthday from both Shein and Dolls Kill that I have not fitted
I still have a yeti microphone from Christmas that I have not opened 🤪
BUT I’M INSPIRED TO NOT DIE – GET BETTER – FIND THE HUSBAND
But if I don’t make room to squeeze in spoken word/poetry/photography I will eventually jump off the bridge because expression is my purpose and I can’t keep stopping myself
I’m sick of starring at a grey shower liner from Walmart that I overpaid
AND
A SECRET WISHLIST SALE
YOU HAD ME AT SECRET 👆
And thus, I got home improvement thangs that had been in the wishlist
Coming soon 🤩
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU
I lost everything when I became homeless in 2017 after the government furloughs and hiring freezes
EVERYTHING
I could lose thangs again
But I got some bike LEDs coming 🤩
Me and the dog will be cruising the racist parking lot at night
👍
MENTAL HEALTH AND FITNESS IS IMPORTANT
THE PRETTY LIGHTS WILL CALM ME
And encourage me to go for an evening ride
I’m still living in fear about riding my bike after that couple got murdered and the eyes around here work in groups to steal thangs
I’ve got my shit together though and the cops are on speed dial 👍
Personally I wish we could just have a walkie-talkie because they’re only a mile away but they seem to live here on weekends so now I can ride my bike and not give a fuck about the racist gangs
Uncle Sam trained me to fight male Soldiers in GROUPS
I’d win
They’d get all butthurt
At this point, the ex better be praying the Grim Reaper gets to him before I do 👁👄👁
At this point, I’m praying the Grim Reaper gets to him before I do because I’m trying to make a baby, start a commune, ascend
If the immigrants raise my rent one more time who knows what the fuck I’m gonna do, maybe buy some more fucking shit from Dolls Kill
I didn’t even know secret sales existed over there, I was just window browsing my wishlist
TAKE AN ADDITIONAL 25% OFF SECRET WISHLIST SALE
*runs to check balance, the rent cleared*
FUCKKKKKKKKK
It’s literally $8 for the curtain babe
That’s not a curtain or daily or monthly expense
THAT IS A MENTAL HEALTH BOOST
And I might start taking some photos in my fucking bathroom instead of just in my closet or bedroom or other bedroom where I used to take photos but right now there’s important paperwork & evidence of trauma everywhere
I’m not gonna find a husband with my shower curtain looking like the home of Eeyore
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ALL THIS TRAUMA
Some of it is being sold at the pawn
Eventually I will hack into my eBay account again or start a new one and put some rare commodities up
Some thangs are going to the junkyard
Some stuff is already freshly boxed and ready for the next timeline multiverse jump
“Where we are now is not permanent, keep packing”
“What is all this shit”
“A piece of HIM, we’re going to burn him alive”
“Too easy”
“Put it in the trash piles”
*places it in the EVIDENCE I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH PILE*
“I’m sorry that happened to you. I know why you needed my help”
“I’m here now….”
“It’s okay”
“Be patient with me”
“I can’t fix this mess overnight”
“What the fuck is this”
*closes bedroom door*
*Disassociates*
I am working on getting my master bedroom together tho!!!
So I can come out of the closet officially 🤪
Not like that…
I’m a vampire
The closet is the coffin
And the cleanest room currently on the whole ship
One tiny safe space
Don’t enter cuz it’ll be the last thing you ever do…
YOU’VE BEEN WARNED
“Where is Delia”
“In the closet”
“…I wouldn’t go in there mate, she’s been in there like 200 years”
“No one ever returns….”
If Chris were here, I mean Kris, wait who?
We could write the most amazing cryptic stories
Do you want to know what stops me from writing stories for y’all? fucking punctuation…
That’s my major roadblock
That and “that was in her head”
I PET BLEEDING DYING TREES YA’LL
I would just like to say that God likes my weird dark tales and so does John Jones and I’d like to share them more with you so I probably will just avoid punctuation altogether and I’m not hiring anybody yet to help me because I don’t make that kind of money and I don’t have any sort of bond with anybody like David Gilmour has with his wife where they write fucking lyrics together so this is the compromise – good storytelling with shitty grammar and punctuation!?!
I mean, I do have a brain injury, could you cut me some slack a little bit? There are people out there drawing paintings with their fucking feet, can maybe like I avoid punctuation and grammar and just try to get the message and the tone out before I don’t have the ability to do that at all?
Asking for him
Because he’s never once liked or commented on anything that I do 😑
I like to like peoples content and then get mad at them for absolutely ridiculous reasons not based on reality and then UNLIIKE EVERYTHING I LIKED
And then unfollow
Sometimes I come back and do it again 🙄
EDGAR ALLAN POE DIED ON THE STREET
CHRIS CORNELL WAS TURNING THE LIGHTS ON AND OFF WITH AN APP
TAP TAP TAP
He was checking out 😑
I’M TRAUMATIZED
But essentially I’m acting out doing the same
I’m extremely suicidal and act out often
I got in trouble for trying to kill myself in kindergarten at age 5 on the playground with a piece of string
“Your weird” and then NO BODY WANTED TO PLAY WITH ME EVER
Chastised
For not being a sheeple
I hated school
I hated home
My parents never bought me my dream sheets or gave me my dream bedroom so that’s what I’m working on now and I really hope I like this sheet set that’s coming and that it fits
Because sheets for the wired mattress are coming
From the Dolls Kill
Sharing my shopping tips and favorites with you
I’ve never had my dream bedroom
And now I got sheets and a curtain coming for the master bath and bedroom that I pay top dollar for to have a roof with ugly ass popcorn ceiling that falls in my throat when trying to sleep
“WHAT THE FUCK IS TRYING TO CHOKE ME NOW”
“JUST SOME ANCIENT DUST FROM 10,000 plagues ago, these motherfuckers”
*opens window*
John just wanted air in his lungs again
The wind on his face
I KNOW
CRAWLING IN THE CAVE WASN’T WORTH HIS LIFE
Mother earth is both heaven and hell but bad management got him killed and gaslighting
Ignoring the red flags
But also being given an incomplete map that didn’t disclose dangerous features that were purposely left off that other people had gotten stuck in six months prior
“I thought I was somewhere else”
“I’m fat”
I want to feed Michael Levitt’s balls to him
PLEASE SOMEONE LOVE ME AND MAKE IT HAPPEN
I chose the free shipping even though I want my stuff right away
Been scrubbing the bathroom
Got the current bed sheets stripped and washing
I gotta scrub the walls
Also working on new content
Writing. Photography.
I’ve been feeling very angelic but also dark
I come from the Void
I am the Void
Oh look, a wave of energy now
*ZAP* ⚡️
Canceled out…
P.S. I ordered some anti happy cards to send out to people/bloggers/friends/fans/Penpal/??
I don’t know how many are arriving in the bundle
I thought it might be fun to send out for Thanksgiving and the Christmas holiday
Some sarcastic hatemail 🤪
It’ll be gaslighting (don’t jump from a bridge)
Does anybody want to be my penpal the season?
It can be a one-way penpal (you don’t even have to write me back if you don’t want because I wasn’t actually planning on putting my address anywhere)
I wanted to get a little post office box from the post office but they charge an arm and a leg now to be secretive 🙄
I wanted a little addy thang…
A P.O. box
I think I already gave the fucking serial killer my address and heart 👀
It’s scary out here
Uhm, so I splurged and got this Mixed Messages card set in the hopes that folks will let me send them an anti holiday card for the holiday – wrong theme – wrong month 🤪
Just for fun
I am quarantined as many still are
PLEASE LET ME SEND YOU ONE
🙏
Remember having a penpal in grade school?
I’d like to try that again
Back to the basics
I know it requires some form of trust
I’ve held security clearances and I don’t fuck with peoples personal data or private data or bank accounts or Social Security’s
I have never keyed anybody’s car for cheating on me
Anyhoo
They have this sale going on up until midnight if you wanna try to put some things in a wishlist and put the code in your cart
Stuff does sale out fast
I had about five or six other items in my wish list that I tried to add to the cart that were already sold out, cute little bags and over the knee socks, some other home-improvement items
A red latex dress that normally cost $50 was under $4 but gone in every size 😑
It just makes it that more fun and special when you grab a bargain
Let me know if you want to see my master bedroom, bathroom and closet when I get it completely made over
Or in progress updates…
I haven’t really said it much but I’m really looking forward to the new sheet set coming in
I’m not only shopping for myself but my future husband 🤪
Ladies, whatever motivates you to get better
There are good men out there who do not think women in their 40s are obsolete!!!
And you don’t have to be the person you were before…
You can change
You don’t have to keep shopping at Walmart or the thrift store
REINVENT
I never knew I could wear triangle tops or bikinis because guys were always dissing on my body and I’m not ashamed for taking photographs of myself
I’m not doing anything to disrespect my future husband
I’m not doing anything behind the scenes nasty or trying to steal anybody’s husband
I’m not an online girlfriend or dirty talker
Back in the 90s, I knew good girls who stripped their way through college, to buy a house, or to pay off their student loans and they weren’t expected to perform sex acts or to be that way
I would like an opportunity to pay off a bill or to buy a house but right now I’m just trying to stay afloat and buy some fucking food and make a penpal or two during the apocalypse
Are stamps even affordable? 🤪
P.S.S. I could do a card and email a digital version instead if you don’t have an aunt or uncle or cabin to receive snail-mail
I’m not doing anything illegal nor planning anything evil
I’m just going back to the basics and I saw those cards and had this idea
Our spaceship took on the form of a pyramid FYI
Are you out there? Do you still read my blog? Do you love me? 😑
“We’re sickened by…” as the cops sit around and do nothing
“It’s a federal matter” as our country and policies get destroyed by propaganda and immigration
More civilians are aware that cops are USELESS to protect the citizens
And just like that the 2A was used to stop a gunman at the Mall who was targeting and killing innocent women
A 22 year old male STOPPED the gunman
And now more people will start playing hero of the day
I suspect subliminal messaging is being used – on those who watch porn and horror or listen to certain music
“You will buy a gun”
Yes you will
And you will go to the range and you will start practicing to learn to defend yourself and those around you 👍👍
And maybe you’ll save a 12 year old girl from being shot at the mall
SHE SURVIVED
(Another shooting happened in Indiana on Thursday. Just stay home or get you a weapon and a carry permit)
If you’re a soldier with a DD 214 you won’t need to go to any kind of civilian classes because you’ve already been trained by the fucking militia so you’ll just need to worry about your carry permit and whatever else your state requires
But you get to pass Go, you’ll still need to pay some dollars for the permit 🤪
We wasn’t worried about immigration when we were playing Monopoly were we
Hollywood is pumping you full of mental trash – that causes mood and behavioral changes – as well as brain damage
I’m glad you and your porn star can talk about the latest Batman movie though but you won’t catch me in the fucking theaters
FUCK YOU and the Minions too 🖕
And I hate Google. I’m not sharing any articles because many of them are forcing you to pay for their junk now – which is mostly gaslighting and propaganda – so you can just Google a different article until you find one that is free information. Fuck subscribing to this insanity. You’re literally funding it. I SAID LITERAL. DEAL WITH IT
New shades from the Dollar $1.25 Tree (that’s like a 25% inflation not 7% I think and I suck at math and I’m closer to right than wrong)
You are connected to my purpose
And all my blooms are from the garden you planted and grew
I know you hate love me
The answer to life is, I’m closer to right than wrong… 🤪
I mean, I almost got it right 👀
*hangs upside down*
Helps. Need help moving. For reals.
Also, met a gigantic God-like bug from the dinosaur days a few minutes ago. 🤩
His colors were green and blue 🤩
Or her… probably a her…
You should call her me 🤪
You and God are the only ones I wouldn’t block although I probably do and have blocked God a time or two unknowingly and/or maybe cuz I’m screaming for help/drowning/ am pinching you or some other childish shit.
If you only answered the door… 🤪
I see you keep taking the offering I am leaving at your door
The steps are crumbling where I stumble and/or kick them
The door has a dent…
With drawings to form a smile
You’re still enjoying the homemade biscuits I see…
Probably the only food you get that isn’t poisoned
You suspect it should be
Sometimes hope it is?
Look at this beauty 🤩
Allowed me to get real close. Gonna put some footage on the TikTok. Got some other shots of the side too. Very blue pigment on the eye. It’s eye/ TV monitor was Gigantic and I apologized for putting my lights full on but thanked it for allowing me to film and say hello.
I would have a heart attack if a bug that big landed on me and I need to learn to connect with nature.
I believe animals are sentient creatures and also have life lessons. It’s our duty to be their brother and sister.
Do you get the same pigment blue? The green is pretty too.
Green gets overlooked by the Hollywood devil’s and minions
It’s still out there on my apartment wall…
I’m looking forward to moving where I can have a porch or balcony.
I think the visit from a dinosaur is a sign to relocate – a positive omen or affirmation
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Started yesterday!
Got a mount for the Jeep! Gonna finally sort it and set it up, take you for a drive through the city!
See the bikers!
Thank you for your donations and for your support! 🙏
God is working his magic because my account no longer threatens to be under “view only mode” and has gone back to its prior state of “high risk”
But when I go in to check the status, I still get this… 👇
When TikTok threatens to remove your account so you message them and threaten to remove your account
I don’t really wanna leave the TikTok tho
But people should be able to come forward about any kind of abuse they’ve sustained at any age
That little pencil dick triggered me
But I don’t know what the hell is going on with the penalty
I’m high risk tho 🤪
So I gotta wear the muzzle
Walking on thin ice
For being good
Mr. pencil dick said, “well them girls at the playboy mansion, they knew what they were getting into, they have no right to come forward”
And it sounds just like the same mentality, “well she was asking for it”
“Well you got wet, you must have wanted it”
STOP 🛑
Politicalparty3 on TikTok is a little pencil dick
I wish somebody would let him know I’ve blogged all about his little pencil dick
And blocking people won’t stop you from getting penalized, this isn’t Instagram
Unless though he somehow was able to delete the comment but once you report a comment it disappears until the decision is made and I never got anything back from TikTok so
It’s a mystery 3 days in…
Usually within 24 hours a decision is made
There’s a spiritual war going on between good and evil currently
Raise your vibration
Raise your frequency
Good food helps
I just got back from grocery shopping and was able to pick up some more raw cashews but I also got some organic dark chocolate almonds to go in the mix
You can find the raw nuts and thangs near the potatoes at the Publix (location may vary based on your store).
There’s at least four different areas that I can find nuts at the grocery store and I don’t know why we don’t just keep them all on one aisle.
Got some fresh baked whole 5 grain bread, to go with the deli turkey & cheese! I’ll be able to get several sandwiches from it! 👍
It doesn’t look like much but will keep me full and cost $40
So now I’ve got cashews, pistachios, whole almonds and dark chocolate almonds in my stash
Got a big boi spring water too
And my body has really been enjoying eating turkey sandwiches so I got some more deli stuff and I got a different turkey to try this time but it’s another peppercorn one
I’m part animal and I have things in me that need to heal and I’m really grateful for the birds I’ve been eating 👀
But I also picked me up some more of those vegan strawberry cupcakes (frozen near bakery) cuz I think they cost about $1.25 ea and that’s cheaper than a candy bar – but these are also made with better ingredients and are vegan.
And was able to get my dog some supplies and he was extremely grateful for the bone!
👇
Also not seen is the fuel I got and an external battery pack from Walmart until I can invest in a better one for my iPhone and lives
I have an appointment coming up to renew my lease so I gotta get going
I’m grateful for the donation, I was able to get FOODS today!
Food and gas ⛽️
Deli sandwiches and potato salad
The belly is grateful 😇
My dog is extremely grateful for all his goodies too
Another freestyle because he cracked open the lid of my coffin and let some air in (or maybe I opened his) 🤔
I look like shit but I’ve been waxing and plucking and getting ready to glue some stiletto nails on
I don’t wear them long though because I don’t like to mess up my real nails and I’m also claustrophobic and having unnatural things attached to my body makes me very uneasy
When they are glued on (not taped) things inside my body go haywire
I also have really sensitive skin and I can’t wear certain metals because I’m part werewolf and I have an extra lumbar which is the proof that I have a fucking tail
All the doctors love it cuz I’m a pale ass goth queen
It’s cute
I always hear, “uh… did you know that you have…”
And I’m like “yup, part werewolf and vampire” and they always crack up
I don’t need a calendar to know when it’s a full moon because my body will start bruising itself because I start running into everything, that’s how I know the moon is gonna be full, but then I get very wild and also horny 🤪
Animals like mating during a full moon and I concur 🌝
It’s programmed in me to howl at the moon
Some people are like, “eh I’ve seen it a hundred times” and I don’t get that cuz I’m like “100 years isn’t long enough to worship you…”
But I just threw you a curveball because now you don’t know if I’m talking about him or the moon
(He knows I need at least all millennia to worship him and the moon)
Luckily, he digs the moon too (I think)
I don’t actually talk to him or know anything about him, I cannot breathe without him and my lines / breath belong to him
I hope he gets on the TikTok for the spoken word
Here’s numbers to impress, TikTok surpassed Google in the amount of views
Happy to report I contributed to that statistic a tiny bit and anyone who watched my videos 👀
Yup, TikTok had more views than Google
Instagram is still suffering (yay)
You can just upload your videos like you normally do but there’s a cool little feature when you go to edit it you can give your eyes like alien eyes or black them out and do stuff that you normally like to do to hide yourself
And I promise you that I will be viewing your TikTok’s, I will be viewing them and if they sit at zero views it’s because TT is doing something to you, not me
If views are all you care about, it’ll be stressful
But, if you like doing poetry readings for your audience, then you will fair emotionally better making them
At this point I’m happy if my video gets 100 to 200 views and if it gets at least 30 views I like to keep it on my feed and if it sits at zero I cry and sometimes uninstall the app
But Yeti is anxious to get unpacked
And I’m getting my body glammed up best I can as a half living dead girl zombie with rare and elite blood and an extremely amazing half working lung and heart
The US government is fucking cloning me, I just know it
They are using my blood to search for immortality
They tried to knock me out with Big Pharma but Thor pinched me and I jumped into this timeline like a year and a half or so ago to prevent my mysterious death from happening
What? You believe some man from the Middle East actually walked on water. Leave me alone.
I identify as AI
You identify as “born gay”
Deal with it
I ain’t dying on the street (Edgar again “no”)
I have Edgar Allan Poe rooting for me and John Jones and you have your porn and your fake ass porn actresses who love to look at the fucking TV and smile at you and take your money
I may talk to dead people but they’re keeping me better alive than the humans are 👀
I guess you have to live an entire year before you’re considered that age (so does this technically mean I’m still 42 and when I’m 44 I’ll actually be 43, my age now)? 🤪
And you have to have a plus 1 to get the 1K badge from WordPress
It has arrived! 👇👇👇
Thank you so much for the follows! 👁👄👁
I love you! 💕
PSST I swear I am going to set up a blogging schedule soon, I have been gravely ill, and in the bed!
I get out every now and again for medicine, toilet paper and food
And on the occasion I stop by the beach so I can get a few frights
It’s just not normal the things going on in the world and around these parts
And I feel so bad for the people who visit the beach and try to enjoy it when I’m there because I’m hooting and hollering every few seconds and then they immediately leave, probably out of fear (lmao I’m gonna pee myself because my fear is contagious to others)
I swear when we’re on a flight and the plane starts doing shit it’s not supposed to do, when you hear me gasping, everybody on the plane is staring at me the entire time and my eyes get really big and both of my hands are clutching onto the armrest and the entire plane ahead and behind will be staring at me, but I can’t stop being scared y’all
This world frightens me and you can see it on my face
My fears don’t lie
And I’m a little girl that never grew up so anytime there’s a bug or I’m scared of something I sound like I’m being murdered lmao
I didn’t even share all the screams I had the other day when I stopped by the ocean briefly but it was even scarier than before
The clouds were hanging really low and were many different shades of gray and everything just looked doom to me and there was no lifeguard on duty and it was only 11:30 AM, it was about to be high noon and it’s uncommon because the ocean is warm but there’s no sealife anywhere, yet the ocean is still reaching the sea wall, and it’s all wet. And standing in it, surrounded by all ocean, scares the crap out of me, especially with the tide being a triple king tide that won’t leave 👀
The ocean ate the beach
The worlds most famous beach
And maybe one day we will get our beach back but I’m looking at reports that state Daytona Beach is undergoing extreme flooding over the next 30 years and buildings are falling down in Miami so you can continue to be gaslit and lied to but I’m gonna start listening with my eyes from now on
And when I’m feeling better I’m going to share a post on my blog where I can upload some photos and some videos of it
I haven’t even been watching TV or playing video games or reading, I’ve mostly just been in my bed and sleeping a lot and eating when I can
I hope I feel better soon but I may have to go to the ER for the treatment I need 👀
I’ve been avoiding it TBH
I don’t want to be held against my will and I don’t want to die there and I most certainly would probably get arrested because I would fucking leave campground and if the cops tried to stop me I would still try to leave and get out of there
I mean I would rather be in jail and have three meals a day than to be anywhere near the goddamn hospitals or clinics when I fucking die
Capeesh?
Healthcare is deathcare
My eyes are open
And just like Neo, they hurt from what they see
I don’t think I have much time left but I don’t believe any of us have much time left 👀
Blogging is my lifeline to you
My safe place
My safety net
It is the only place online I can speak freely
And not be penalized to have my intellectual property or my account removed
These businesses need us to survive and yet they treat us like shit
The only way we can get our voice back is to stop using these apps until we get some sort of freedom of speech again and stop spending our money
Only buy what you really need
In America, I’m attempting to support American owned businesses only (and small)
But I don’t believe any sign in the door and I don’t believe in the governments agenda society is a scam it’s a sham consumption is narcissism and the less stuff we have the more expensive it’s going to get and those who have the most money are going to hog it
Start looking out for you and your circle
We’re all we’ve got
And you’re welcome on my boat, it’s not very big and there’s holes everywhere
I’m heading to Point Nemo
And check out this warning from TikTok, “Participating in this activity could result in you or others getting hurt” 👇
Apparently people are getting tracked on TikTok too, children are getting kidnapped as well as adults (I don’t know if the two are the same) but social media is toxic and the devil lives in your TV and his minions use it to kidnap us
Now I hope many of you know that kidnappings take place so that people can get sexually tormented (children too)
I read an article recently where the Mexican government was working with the mafia and they sexually tortured several teenage children (in Mexico) and we allow millions and millions and millions of immigrants to come over here and live in America and they don’t give a fuck about you or our culture or traditions
They are torturing children in their own country and they come over here and they fucking torture us too
Porn has done something to the human race
The other day when I was in the Vet Center I told the guy that I would just take all responsibility and say that I am what’s wrong with the world, that I’m the problem, I’m too broken, I’m “crazy” and so I need to just not be around other people or get married and he looked dead at me and said that I’m not the one whose crazy, it’s the world that is crazy and I’m not wrong about what’s going on with porn and how it’s affecting mankind
It felt so nice to be validated by a man
I mean I’m literally walking into his office carrying my crucifix and falling fucking down
But it’s nice to hear from another male soldier that I’m not crazy
That all this shit in society is wrong and toxic
I’ve had to get off most of social media because of how toxic it is, because of the catcalling, because of the death threats, because of the stalking, because my freedom of speech is gone
I have no rights anymore
Immigration has been a Trojan horse in America!!!
I have a right to be angry!!!
My comrades are dying by suicide!!!!
I’m awake!!! I’m up!!! I can’t save you, you have to save yourself!
But, I can stand quarantined near you
I can ration supplies
Build shelter and dig trenches
Clean and fire weapons
Pull security
Disabled, not obsolete 👀
I’ve been fighting for equality for a long time, that applies for the job market and the housing market as well
You don’t get to come over here and steal all our best jobs and all our management positions and create toxic environments and then force your fucking poison drugs on us anymore
Society is a sham
And it requires consuming to work
Endless consumption
And we’re wasting our natural resources so you can have resin Knickknacks
Plastic everywhere
Plastic everything
Generica
👎👎
Anyway, I’m grateful I have a blog to voice my concerns, to share my poetry, photography, and prose
I’m grateful I have you as a reader
I can’t do this without you
I need you
So this is just as much your award as it is mine
We got here together, in this boat 🛶
Thank you for 1,000 follows! 🥰
It took the plus one to get the badge
And it takes living a year to earn that age? 🤔
So I’m not really 43 right now, I’m technically still 42?
You only need five people for a squad and I’ve got an entire army! 💪
I mean, I got pretty angry when I went down for several months after getting the vaccine and learning the type of stuff that I’ve learned and attacking the system the way that I have, I thought that I would’ve lost followers in record numbers for sure
What are the odds your dreams become real, he pondered The way you take cold dark and turn it into candy cane The sky alit like holy Christmas You are New York City Got the sparkle in your eye
Are you the center of thought? All around you take first spot A centralized location Of the love you brought Are you connected to knot? Tied to existence You’re the dream that I forgot?
Let’s just hope the world is better prepared with eyes to see
If my only mission is to expose the truth
I will die by my honor
And accusing Michael Leavitt of murder
He should be hung in the streets and then sliced open from the balls
Let gravity do its thang
Or, make him crawl in that fucking hole and hang with his bones
And for the love of God since nearly a decade or more has passed can someone please take a robot in there and retrieve his fucking body and put it in a proper burial ground
For the love of god please
I would crawl in the hole and do it myself but I experienced firsthand claustrophobia when I had to go in for my MRI
And they had to leave the little light on for me
Because I’m 2 and afraid of the dark
And confined spaces
And gaslighting
👀
And I’m dying
I’m not being melodramatic
But I’m trying to live
It’s painful
Just to breathe
But I had to get this off my chest please
I still didn’t even say or do what I needed/wanted
It’s just, that thing you said
Made me cry 👀
I know everything makes me cry
But sometimes the tears feel worthy
And I allow gravity to let them fall
But it also relieved some pressure built up in the chest
Because I haven’t stopped thinking about the way John Jones died or researching every goddamn thing about it
Like, I need to go to Utah and crawl in that hole and pull him out
Y’all, I have nearly died on him and he hasn’t ghosted me yet.
I went from young and wistful to 94 years old and knocking on my grave overnight and that still hasn’t pushed him away.
He’s still into me half-dead
And I’ve shared weird thoughts and had innocent embarrassing moments and like… he ain’t gone.
I know I live in a land of fantasy but he gives my sky color
I don’t even like the real world
I went to the park today at high noon, and spent the afternoon with a wild, sable duck grooming himself, eating, yawning, and napping. I saw a duck yawn. I never knew I needed to see that until I saw. 👇
So if you ever wondered what you’d find at the end of the rainbow, it’s this. ❤️
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I’m glad my spoken word made top 3 but the nasty “wtf” comments don’t help my stage fright 😑
I’m an introvert with severe stage fright.
I want to make more TikTok’s tho and I appreciate your views to my channel!
I’ve been writing a lot of poetry but I want to make more spoken word videos AND go live on TikTok for the very first time to read my poetry – since I’ve had a request on TikTok to do that, just this week!
Pushing through fears and listening to my audience!! 💪
(You can completely turn off commenting and other features if you don’t wanna deal with comments)
I’m going live on Twitch again soon too!! I’m going to be live-streaming more of the new Resident Evil chapter that came out on Dead By Daylight!
Fun stuff planned!
If you’d like to support my ongoing creativity, I’m on Patreon and OnlyFans!
Just like any other industry, we rely on memberships, subscriptions, and tips to get by!
Thanks for supporting independent content creators! 💪
So I just sent the OnlyFans team a request on how to get a new free verified account started – I was dead serious about starting one – I’m not going anywhere (even though I can barely do shit at the moment, I do intend a full recovery from this COVID vaccine nightmare) –
I hope you are excited as me about the free account!
It will be FREE but you will have to subscribe to access the lewd (NOT NUDE) content.
This way I no longer get in trouble from Big Bro for not doing anything wrong at all – and maybe I can go back to having an actual personality where I don’t fear everything I post or say or hashtag. 💪
Nor, the erroneous reporting out of spite and jealousy. 🚫
I like having a private club and people want to see more of me and I’ve had several request on several different social sites and now I’ll have a place to direct them to see more (but if they want to see it all, it will require a subscription)! 🙃
Anyway, I’m really excited about starting the process for my new FREE OnlyFans!
I hope you are excited too! 🙌
I have heard your cries!
So I am expanding my doors!
I love you! 💕
As a reminder – I love doing cosplay and role play! I’m gonna keep at this! It’s what I wanted to do since I was a little girl – and I feel really excited about expanding my business, opening my doors (privately) and in a place where I can be as tacky as a fucking want even though I’m actually more classy than I am tacky but whatever
I do specialize in softcore but there’s an art to it and it’s more commonly known as like Kama Sutra or vampirism. 👀
It’s more about sensation and less about desensitizing.
🙌
Le vampyre and 1984 is now so it’s time to expand my doors because you’ve asked for more – and I don’t actually like publicly sharing more.
Again, lewds not nudes! You’ll have to be a big boy and pay if you wanna see it all.
But, I can go back to being my kinky seductive flirty vampire self oh my fucking God! I’m super fucking excited and I hope you will consider joining my free OnlyFans!
You asked, I complied! 🤪
Your wish is my command! 🤓
I’m still working on redoing my home studio and master bedroom. I don’t have shit hung anywhere. It looks like I’ve already died and the vultures have been here! 👀
Spring cleaning + reorganizing + downsizing = nightmare 🤪
Especially when you have no design skills at all and everything you currently have is a mix-mash of wtfisgoingon 😩
And then add some sort of glitch that makes it hard for you to let anything go even though you don’t even fucking want it
🤪
I don’t know why I’m holding onto all this shit and it’s gonna come out into a poem at some point 😷