Private (poetry)

I went private on my feed
Cuz he kept looking back at me
Like a vulture circling
He kept looking back at me ๐Ÿ‘€

ยฉ Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

Welp. What’s next? Gouging my eyeballs out while I’m still alive cuz he can’t stand what I see? ๐Ÿ‘€

What if I’m blocking all the passages preventing me from being able to come back or from you going further?

I can’t crawl back up the hole now anyway

Gravity ๐Ÿ‘€

What if I’m blocking you because I don’t want to be saved and I don’t want you to get hurt? ๐Ÿ‘€

What if I die because I know too much? ๐Ÿ‘€

These caves are crawling with paranoia

And you can’t scratch

I don’t think you should be crawling around the places I’m going, you don’t have the experience that I do

The Army trained me to observe

I see all ๐Ÿ‘€

And I need land pronto fast to dig several foxholes and an underground bunker like those in NAM.

And a T3 armory ๐Ÿ‘€

The Army trained me with LIVE grenades, I have a badge and all ๐Ÿ‘€

Had to run around an obstacle course with live grenades, with our drill sergeants randomly pretending to be an enemy trying to get them off of you

They did not get them off of me, they tried ๐Ÿ‘€

Where’s my old school Army at? They probably training everybody with video games these days…

They don’t even have to enter a combat zone, they sit in the fucking chair in a building to do the fucking dirty work,

This ain’t the same fucking country anymore

Apparently India has changed all the rules because they got all the best positions and management positions now and Mexico coming in second place in America and I reckon Japan and China are under that list but Americans are way low down on the totem pole on jobs and that’s a fucking issue for me and a huge red flag ๐Ÿšฉ safety issue Trojan horse, this is fucking war, I’ve called it!

I mean it’s true I can’t live without you but I’m not going to lead you to doom

๐Ÿ‘€

I may be petite but I have a big big purpose

Policemen and soldiers have a way of listening to me ๐Ÿ‘€

I hope nothing has changed in this timeline

๐Ÿ‘€

There’s a problem when I’m being denied government work so that people from other countries can come over here and get those positions

And the rent kept going up so I had to use my thrift savings retirement fund and also the money I had in my savings account and I also had to max out my credit cards when I became homeless in 2017 because of the government furloughs and the government hiring freezes and I couldn’t pay my thousand dollar rent anymore and I didn’t have anybody to take care of me and when I reached out for help, every single person in my family turned a blind eye while I had to watch them make huge donations towards animal fundraisers on FaceBook

๐Ÿ‘€

So they had money to help out some animals but they didn’t have money to try to help me keep my vehicle that I had already put $18,000 in ๐Ÿ‘€

And I hate every single one of them and I hope they all burn and I hope that they know they are not welcome on my commune and they will not be receiving my help so don’t fucking come to me, they are also my enemy ๐Ÿ›‘โœ‹๐Ÿ›‘

No blood allowed! ๐Ÿ‘€

Ain’t nobody going the tight places I can squeeze

God made me lethal but petite ๐Ÿ‘€

I’m also clumsy and not sure how I’ve already survived this long ๐Ÿ‘€

You should know that all my shit has been hacked into ๐Ÿ‘€

I turned off tracking everywhere but they’re still tracking me

And according to a recent article I read they will track you more when you request them not to track you ๐Ÿ‘€

Okay but that’s illegal!!! And I’m going to be asking for my data from a lot of organizations very soon and I hear they get grumpy about it!!

The places I’m going you probably shouldn’t come ๐Ÿ‘€

And I may make it extremely inaccessible to return

You can’t turn back

There’s no turning back where I’m to go ๐Ÿ‘€


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