Meet Daisy

Store said she’d been there the longest – adopted and returned

They said she likes to bite



Charlie already wants to extend the family

I told Charlie it might not be best knocking Daisy up her first night here

Not to mention the HABs aren’t even completed

I was going in for substrate and saw that sign for “50% off”

They said eventually it’d be reduced even further – to 75% and then well… she goes one more place and tries one more time (where surely she will bite and their number one rule for biting is “put down”)

It saddens me this society – this lifestyle of bartering one another at what cost

There was another girl that was born there – i really wanted her – she had a cow-like print

I NEED LAND

And a shed

I don’t care what the influencers think

“…this is animal abuse”

But mine are sleeping peacefully in their chaotic HAB

(HAB is short for habitat for those who don’t know)

They also get me as their caretaker and no one on TikTok seems to get that

I told Daisy today that the family returned her because she didn’t belong with them, she belonged here

I’m scared of Daisy

But she let’s me handle her, has not bit me, and has stopped squealing like a squeaky toy when I pick her up

She also allows me to segregate Charlie even tho she runs after him

It’s new to her

Probably hurts

She knows she wants it but she don’t

And Charlie be down there doing things that should be behind closed doors

But she could rip his head off when she is thru

And that’s the reality of adopting two Syrian hamsters from different stores

Male and female

Of breeding age

It’s almost like I needed enrichment in my life

Trying to keep two hamsters from killing one another or falling in-love

They said she was spicy so I named her after a sweet flower


Daisy seems to have already taken to her name

She knows not to bite me….

She’s learning her new HABs

She’s met Charlie 4 times – and he was ready to extend the family right away

They have been grooming one another

Licking and sniffing

Lots of face-to-face stare offs

Nose touches

Could be love or war


She’s not as fit? It was her first time on a 10 inch or 8 inch wheel. They had a saucer at the store

Prob used it to lay on


Charlie has a friend now but she could be a killer so I won’t leave them alone



I know I shouldn’t be buying hamsters while dying and not even having the correct HAB setup

But now my life has purpose

Can’t move into my Noah phase if the ark is empty

Back to the basics

They say I am a child that never grew up

So I got a hammy

Logical

(And I know you love me even more)

(But you don’t know why)

(Cuz you fucking hate me and will never speak again)


Charlie and Daisy sitting on a tree

K-I-S-S-I-N-G


They kinda have our first name initials

Just realized

Awe


The worst day of my life

The sun came up
But there’s no morning
All I ever loved
Was left for what then?
All hours working
Nothing is worth it

There are things I regret
Make a list
Haven’t listed them all yet

There is repent
But that just leaves a pit

Might be homeless
The fires won’t give a shit

But the worst part is
I’m the one who caused it

The best is yet to come?
Your body lie frozen

I’m inadequate
Insufficient for a purpose
I’m called Worthless

Sunrise over sorrow
What comes tomorrow?


Copyright © 2025 Delia Ross. All rights reserved.


Poetry forever @poeeternal



real life

he didn’t fall out of a 5th story window tho did he –

he “fell ill”

(stories from Russia)


she drowned in the back of a cop car – with handcuffs behind her back

(stories from Tennessee)


he musta done something so God awful he never wanted to be found. so they reported him missing and pulled his body from the ocean – but remains unnamed

(stories from Virginia)


the most inspiring couple of 2024 🤩


and here’s me not giving a fuck about anything and everything all at once

“i’m not suppose to wear this at my age”

*subject to go private again without any warning – don’t come in*


Prayers from purgatory

Father,
There’s almost nothing left
My sister is dead
I’m bereft
Sick in the head
Near out of breath
Want money in the bulkhead


Compartments upon compartments
Secret dirty pockets


Here I sit
Here I remain
Losing grip
Can’t change the game


Mirror mirror on the wall
Reflecting curse
And where I fall
Fuck you all


Bonds come in many forms
Like my love
It comes in swarms
Electronic storms

Investments
Feels like I’m restless
I’m vested
Better than arrested


I thought investment always meant high-risk / cutting at my wrist


If a paper bond is lost, stolen, destroyed or otherwise mutilated, a replacement electronic bond can be requested.

“MUTILATED”
The wife called aggravated
Divorce threatened
Says husband is hated!


New purchase
But it won’t help my purpose
I’m worthless

Late bloomer?
But don’t be discouraged
Blame the Boomer’s


Forced obsolescence
And second guesses
Year-long stresses
Everything depresses


Secular science / sleeping lion’s / full of compliance \

Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.


My nutritionist complains that spring water “has no calories” but I get cranky when it takes me 3 days and several stores later to find it

Florida and Texas have parasites in the water – and if we can’t wash our face with it – so it won’t get up yer nose – I checked – the ear canal is also a route – but then I would think the eye

Sylvia Plath LIED

I gotta start boiling my water to bathe

If your houseplants are dying, stop feeding them tap water. Pro tip.


I’m still 110 pounds – despite eating a shit ton of mostly vegetarian food – and not rebounding for a solid week.

Kept eating like a pig – nope can’t gain any weight

Getting back to rebounding tho – just been deep down wallowing and trying to fatten up

My heart is obsessed with rebounding tho – the carpet still hasn’t been replaced but it’s still March and time is awful slow

Also me: I’m running out of time

I don’t have an ounce of patience after wasting my 20s & 30s

I cry so much


Tasteless (poem)

I had to make order of the chaos
By getting rid of it
Crying lots and a little bit
Putting dying on hiatus
Changing energy from stasis
Burning bridges and first basis
I’m the best at tasteless

Copyright © 2023 PoeEternal.


I know you’re out there. I know you still love me.

The furniture was removed for free yesterday.

I was grateful and humiliated at the same time.

I wish I had offered him more than a protein treat for reward.

He took the treat.

I wish he would have taken my humiliation with him out the door. But alas, it remains with me.

There is nothing here but broken dreams and damaged carpet.

I am but a shell.

Crawling back to theta mode

I hate it here

This manmade infected environment full of natural flavor and narcissism

I know you’re in love with a prostitute

Did you know the government makes money from prostitution and most porn is made in California and Nevada made prostitution legal and our doors are open to immigration 24/7 and there is a direct link to sex trafficking and prostitution

I get called a “manhater”

The place is empty of life or longing.

Dogs and cats are not native to the environment

Just wanna see earth win

White people should be on the endangered species list – check the census

Glad Black Lives Matter are the only one who matters


Slums (poetry and confession)

I’m down in the slums
Marching around
Counting my crumbs
Mostly dumbfound

© Delia Ross. 2023 / @poeeternal

Two days ago I fed a squirrel.

Yesterday a squirrel grabbed my attention and brought a gang of his friends.

I fed them too.

I also added dry split pea to the seed and nut mix.

Now I got a bird grabbing my attention.

I’ll feed him too

I’m tempted to start buying squirrel and bird feed, and start spreading it everywhere (currently they’re eating my stash of food supplies) (I’m five pounds)

Stop on the side of the road, toss a bit

The city gonna start fining me for saving the world

It starts at home

And in your enemies backyard

They’re killing everything

Nihilism yah know


Psst I jumped into a deep pond

Now I’m somewhere 150 feet deep

I don’t want depth blackout

Thank God it was a full moon (I think)

It’s so cold down here a tear in my suit could send me to shock

I don’t know what’s next but the answers are coming (frighteningly)

I didn’t really have to crawl down here – but I panicked – and I did

I really deserve better than this

I think I’m learning my lessons and ready to try again

Need safe space

Where there is water moss will grow – especially when a source of warmth is involved

We can’t leave earth

Space exploration is a cool idea but that’s all it is and they go through great amounts to keep everyone asleep and hustling confusion

Astro physicist Neil Degrasse stated that the astronauts in the space station are not “in space”, he says “that is not space” and that he wants to go to the moon. He even stated the space station was “boring” and “didn’t want to do what 100 people have done before”

Let’s send Neil to the moon

Oh you lost all evidence on how to go eh

Oh the moon landing was rehearsed

Oh they didn’t have a phone line on the moon nor a way to talk from the moon to earth thus that famous quote we hear Neil say was actually recorded on earth (during rehearsal) (laughs)

So I might be moving

Onto the street

Come April 1st

Or, doors could be opening for me

There is no plan B currently

There is only isolation, packing/donating/selling/trashing my entire existence (minus some things I find valuable and I’d rather bury them in the dirt than tell you what they are)

I still sleep with my bayonet 🙂

I kept my vegan makeup and new closet items

And I’ve since added 4 new pairs of leggings to the collection (giving me 6 new pairs of comfies, nearly a week’s worth)

But some cause cancer

Laughs

So been hunting all cotton, wool, leather for wearing (sorry not sorry, natural does not hurt the eggs or delivery goods)

I’m not interested in memory foam no matter the name or price

That shit is toxic

Soon, the furniture will be removed from the apartment

The deep cleaning has already begun

I may need a shredding session like WaterGate

Only… I don’t know what files to keep or shred

People are dead

The deeds no longer matter

How long do you keep a receipt

And the looming tax files are the only thing I know for certain I should probably keep (medical and military records too)

Aside from that, I’ve got memories from folks and family I don’t want to remember

Or maybe I do

But all these things got to go

Things I’d like to do:

Yep so that’s about it…

Happy depression 2023


Bond (poetry)

I come without bond
Broken
Look inside
Heart ain’t coping

Like leaping ledge
Just barely hoping
Your foot will land
But surface sloping

© Delia Ross. 2023 / @poeeternal


Man I am obsessed with cave diving deaths. Death in general because we were holding hands. Depth blackout terrifies me.

We can’t leave earth. We can’t even explore past 150 feet safely inside the earth.

What were you doing down there, John.

People will easily talk you into your death.

Give you maps withholding information needed to make valid decisions.

These demons try and avoid karma and fate by getting you to choose the wrong door.

I don’t want to go down with the ship.

There’s gonna be light at the end of the tunnel for me and that’s gonna be my way out of here.

Got an online offer on my Jeep. Not sure the avenue I’m going here – but why not downsize my ride.

I love her too much and I can’t take anything with me to heaven.

I also looked to see what they were being sold at with my mileage and year.

An SUV no longer serves my purpose here.

Would go down with the ship but why.

There were spaces on the lifeboat’s.

Lives could have been saved…


I’ve stopped crawling headfirst (still headstrong unfortunately)


“The answers are coming, rest Neo”


Nearly died, completely turning my life around.

Still learning basic concepts

Like how no man has ever seen me with any value – and destroyed everything I owned – while watching me work so hard to prove my worth/existence

But gentrification exists, because the rich hoard everything and they love us watching us fight for the cheap shit

A bone just to survive

I’m resetting my game. I’m allowed.

End game/Quit. Reset/Start over.

This time I go forward knowing my value to man is NONE.

Which is fine because 1-5 have an STD and I can’t look at any of them and take them serious.

Even if I wanted to date, the pool is tainted.

It ain’t worth the dive.

I live for God now. Sorry not sorry.

And I went back to the Mall. Spencer’s had even more hardcore sex toys out – and little boys were around.

I nearly threw up.

I don’t want anything to do with this porn infested devil society.

I’ll never know what it’s like to be valued or loved by a man – because I don’t have fake tits or come with “instant gratification” mode.

Sex with us commoners is boring to them

They hate our existence in general

The divorce rate is 85% and 1 in 5 men have an STD.

I know I’m boring and cheap so why you looking anyway.

You can’t afford me.

Honestly, it’ll take a miracle to get me to date now knowing one in five can give you cancer (there are some known parasites that can be spread through human contact) (they didn’t give us the nitty gritty in school but I got the good education some of the time)

Research parasites that cause cancer – then “human contact” (they won’t tell you it’s in the man’s sperm)

But you can catch a parasite from a cat box or kissing on an animal or eating food

The labs aren’t designed to see them (with malicious intent and purpose)

The elites were plagued with parasites

LAUGHS


I live for God now (unless he finds me a husband without an STI/STD or porn addiction or addiction of any kind unless to me)

🤪

BABES you can do this

It’s not end all

I did a CARMAX offer

If the physical offer holds up near as good as the digital, I may bite

Suddenly want a car…

Love the Jeep to much

Took good care of her, she’s at 75K miles

Feel frighteningly suicidal but at least this way she’s safe out of my hands

I want a little feminine car

And maybe some work from home or a hotdog stand

Do not want to die here

Do not want this hand

RESET GAME

“Are you sure, all data will be removed”

NO YES


No car, no address!

LAUGHS


Needed to lighten my load

Buoyancy

So many people have died exploring caves.

The earth is alive

Stop selling sex toys in front of minors. Like what the fuck


1 in 5 men have an STD and a divorce or three on their belt.

I got new skates for Christmas. Too much value, too much fun.

I once lived for man but they are obsessed with porn stars and always have money to impress and spoil and buy sex workers.

They love the backdoors and backrooms. Even the cleanest of them, the ones you’d never suspect cheating most definitely are. They use burner phones, identities, and make good use of work away from home.

In college I learned one husband gave his wife HIV/AIDS but started medication without telling her thus sealing her fate (it’s illegal to do this but men do not care) (the medication did not work for her because they did not start it together and he kept infecting her)

1 in 5 y’all

I may leave America all together

It’s disgusting here

My neighbors are gross

I want my neighbors to be the crocodiles and the crows

And a man that isn’t infected or at risk or risky behavior

Stop looking at me

Keep back ten feet

(I also researched other countries and their sexual health isn’t any better)

My best friend always said before she died by suicide age thirteen, “don’t be silly, put a condom on your willy” – Meika Capps

Miss yah babe!


Undertow (poem)

Moving forward, turning corners, never finding home
Keep listening, less speaking, and most are always wrong
I go the distance that few ever roam
Universal lessons keep me on my own
Often tribulations can only be learned alone
Weakened and discouraged I’ll stop but not for long
My heart more calloused and hard like bone
Whatever it takes to keep me strong
With wisdom of knowing looking back will turn me to stone

And so this lesson I pack up and carry
The weight of them always seem to vary
Some are black and some are cherry
Some will taste like a strawberry
Some will make you say Hail Mary
Some are found in the obituary
Most will leave you cold and weary
With eyes that sting and oh so blurry
These streets have roadkill of doubt and worry

Self-medicate to try and heal
Get the energy to climb uphill
Another battle of self-will
Another demon I have to kill
Swallow the pain just like a pill
Buried deep so I can’t feel
There’s mostly lows and little thrill
And not an exit out of here
By now my soul is feeling ill
The answers here are never clear

Tie my boot without goodbye
Can’t sit around and watch me cry
More of those with every sigh
If you open and peer inside
It will appear tie-dye
Like an endless horizon in the sky
Pinks and purples which mystify
There my soul longs to fly
Not depths of low but certain high
And not a tear in my eye

You’ll never get close to me
I live by this decree
Very few are worthy
But God has a skeleton key
Buried under a Joshua Tree
Searching will leave you thirsty
The depths I’ve cried fill up a sea
And by this I’m already drowning
It’s past my knee
The undertow came quickly

© Delia Ross. 2022 / @poeeternal


Shotgun (poetry)

I wish I’d hear news of your death
I’d be winded
Overcome with giddy
You think I’m kidding?

I’d start a committee
Organize their pity
Piss on your city
Sorrow is silly


He likes to use the word “our”
But I’m not allowed in his yard
At any hour
The wind blows hard


I need to bunker down
Spend six months alone
Get out of this town
Let him feel the undertow


I’m reactive
Chemical explosive proactive
Positive attracted
Faith compacted


“Baby’s not allowed to see”
Words said cruelly
Cut right through me
Trust left fully
Got nowhere left to be


He wants me in a red bow
Lingering low
Black night and espresso
Staggering combo


He’s not a friend
He’s a one-way street
To a dead end
Devil called “shotgun” seat


I spend too much time and money for simple validation
Guys are cheap
There’s never a rose or coffee waiting
But another message complaining they are aching
Meanwhile, bills are paid and fridge is full – none of which they are responsible for
None of them would pick me off the floor
So I’m closing my own door


It feels redundant
Swimming up a current
I know I’m not stunning
Losing’s unbecoming


I deserve the cold earth
Rotting in the ground
Born with so little worth
Not gonna stick around


Kink and Coffee
Blowjobs and toffee


© Delia Ross. 2022 / @poeeternal

Position (freestyle rhyming poetry)

I live somewhere
On the outskirts
You won’t find me
Where his position asserts

I’m not responding
To alarms and alerts
Even when I’m craving
All his bloody desserts

© Delia Ross. 2022 / @poeeternal

More on my OF (I make sensual content. I’m currently Top 50)

An all original organic human bean 🫘


Socials & Support: https://linktr.ee/PoeEternal


GOD DAMN YOU

BLOCKED

*schedules appointment for a tattoo immediately*

DEBT FREE HUH

I’M GONNA CUT YER DICK OFF

🖕

GOOD LUCK FINDING SOMETHING THAT NO LONGER EXISTS

My competition mostly at age 44 still ovulating – is a bunch of obese confused girls sex bots who probably removed their ability to have children

And if they haven’t yet, they will in their 30s, Hallelujah!!!!

YOU STILL GOT SOMETHING THAT THE MEN WANT AND DESIRE

AND IF NOT, YOU STILL GOT SOMETHING GOD WANTS AND DESIRES

DON’T LEAP FROM THE BRIDGE YET BABE

COLLEGE IS A SCAM

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT YOU WERE SEXUALLY MOLESTED

YOU STILL HAVE WORTH WITH DEBT AND SAGGY BOOBS!!!!!

I GOT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STOP OPENING YOUR EYES AND REACHING FOR THE PHONE

SOCIETY IS TOXIC

YOU HAVE WORTH BABY GIRL

I’M SORRY THESE DEMONS KNOW NO BOUNDS

I KNOW IT HURTS

YOU’RE RIGHT TO BE PISSED

BABE 144!!!!

“I see dead people”

They’re everywhere!!!!

LOST SOULS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ELITES WERE PLAGUED WITH PARASITES

THE WORLD TODAY IS PLAGUED BY PARASITES

If you’d like to not be obese black walnut wormwood if you’d like to not be dying of cancer black walnut wormwood if you’d like to not have IBS black walnut wormwood if you’d like to live a little bit longer black walnut wormwood

How long before it’s taken off the market because I told my fucking enemy the big secret magic ingredient to this shit and he wrote it down, he wrote it fucking down, he wrote it down! I blogged about it immediately cuz the entire hour session he didn’t fucking write anything down until those three words came out! he didn’t give a fuck about the other detox medication, it was only those three words he wrote down

BLACK WALNUT WORMWOOD

WORTH OBSERVING AND NOTING

I OBSERVE EVERYTHING

And if I’m angry over the insensitive conditioning these faggot boys are doing

Maybe God is too

JUDGMENT HOUR IS HERE

GUESS WHOSE EYES HAVE SOME FUCKING WORTH

“But we like virgins”

I’M GONNA RIP YOUR PENSIS OFF

*goes back to sleep*

I HATE TIKTOK AND INSTAGRAM

I’M ONLY THERE FOR YOU

I DON’T KNOW HOW ELSE TO REACH YOU

The reason I’ve been confused on whether you should get right with God or me because same 🙄

And yep he can strike me dead any moment

I AM ONLY A VESSEL

*goes back to delusions and sleep*

I’m gonna burn it all down

Apophis is coming

We can’t leave earth

The establishment are scared

HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF CUZ MONEY IS NARCISSISM IS A MANMADE DEVIL SOCIEY DOGMA

Sorry

Channeling 😑

*breathes on window, draws weird symbol*

I DON’T KNOW WHAT ANYTHING MEANS

THE GREAT FILTER IS REAL

THE SUN IS ELECTRICAL

WE LIVE ON A WATER WORLD

No one ever said, “maybe earth was icy and smashed into other objects (uranus) pushing it closer to the sun and thus life”

It’s the demon neighbors don’t chill out with making all this unnecessary goddamn noise

Oh, they are working in groups to rob single women, elderly, and disabled

These motherfuckers won’t hesitate to shoot me in my back to steal my bike

COPS ARE DOING THEIR JOB SPREADING PROPAGANDA

DON’T BE FOOLED BY THE CROCODILE TEARS

ASIAN DICTATORS IN UNIFORM

That black guy was worried about getting caught with his weapon when his life was ending

I HAVE NOTHING TO LIVE FOR

I WILL SKIN ME A HEAD OR TWO

SHOW ME HOW MUCH I DO NOT MATTER

You love your virgin mentality so much that 68% of the species has gone extinct so fuck your goddamn propaganda ideology fuck you fuck you fuck you

It’s conditioning these other monsters to “ruin us” and sacrifice us to the dark entity early on

I CAN’T IMPRINT ON THE DEVIL

THE DEVIL CANNOT IMPRINT ON ME

FUCK YOU

We are organic computers and if the government doesn’t get their toxic shit together there’s going to be dire consequences

DIRE

THE SEVENTH SEAL IS OPEN

(There’s nowhere safe for me online social media wise. It’s so toxic for an angel) 😑

(I only went in the feed for a second) 😑

And my value was completely stolen from me


The Great Void (poetry)

The Great Void
I’ve stood the edge
Gave humanity my hand
I have tried to help the damned
God has licked the wound where bled
And I stand near him unfledged

I peer the end
All nothingness
Not overjoyed
Not his to dress

I am the world
Though light is love
Taste amaroid
Like darkness tough

Fell through the rough
Found heaven’s grace
Have keys to gate
No name to face

I’ve stood the still
Frame by frame revealed
Lost my soul and will
Yet God is here….

© Delia Ross. 2022 / @poeeternal

Coming full circle now ⭕️

We’re in God’s simulation. But we’re living inside the devil’s Matrix, it’s crumbling. Society is a cult. Guaranteed.

The Bible has been manipulated to worship false idols

God doesn’t want you to feel any shame

God wants you to win!

He already did!

Lu is dragging out his final moves! He knows he is through!

He’s a drowning man and wants to take you down with him!

Don’t comply!

Cast the devil out!

Tell him to leave your ship! Your words have power!!!!!

Wake up!!!!!

The Matrix has you!!!!

Knock knock!!!!

Stay in the light ⚡️🔆⚡️


Junkmail (poetry)

I moved him to my junkmail
A folder titled “this hell”
You’ll never measure the scale
But I’m erasing every detail

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

I scheduled my email for deletion. I didn’t save anything. Conversations with my dad, the dead, intellectual property, spam, the whole shebang. It’s gone. Decades and decades of conversations. Nothing saved.

I don’t want to remember anything of my life.

Is anyone worried for me? 🤔

Y’all, it’s gonna sound weird but I did a vinegar foot soak, and my breathing improved. My body was going into anaphylactic shock. But there was an advertisement that kept appearing over and over again for a home remedy

And I thought what the fuck

I know I was nearly burned on the stake in the past for witchcraft but…

A witch needs land and apple trees

An apple a day yes

Let them rot

And ferment 👀

Acid is the cure all (well not the cure all cure all but it’s now my number one most loved stench)

The Garden of Eden is full of vinegar on shelves 👀

Don’t judge

I’m not even coughing hardly any more

Welp. I don’t know how many lives I’ve now used but I feel like I’ve got a new body

Compared to “I’m not gonna get out of here am I” 👀

And I wasn’t just going from panic to calm, my body was breaking out in hives and I couldn’t breathe

And the VA were like, “your tests results are all fine”

And I literally left a voicemail screaming at patient advocacy that I was about to fucking die and that I needed a new care team but then I found out that if I got a prescription outside of the VA that the VA would cover it so you know

oh did I tell you I went to church Sunday?

I have energy again

So I’ve been doing vinegar foot soaks for 10 to 15 minutes three times a day now

🎃🎃🎃

Apparently you can drink vinegar as a tonic too so I’m about to be drinking in it, not just bathing in it (and I’m doing facial tonics and even ear swabs)

I find white distilled vinegar works best

I mix it with water

Half and half but you should do stuff based on your own skins tolerance

But don’t ever put vinegar directly on your skin because it’s acid and it will burn so you need to dilute it

Don’t get it in your fucking eyeballs or anything

Apparently you can do a scalp soak and it will cure dandruff 👀

However, it can dry out your hair but I’m gonna be giving it a go! Dip dip!

Just change blood bath to vinegar bath (put 1 to 2 cups in yer bathwater if you want your skin to feel soft as a baby again, soak for 10 – 15 minutes in lukewarm water a few times a week – skin not hair)

I have also learned you can use it as a deodorant and mix it with like lemon water

Seriously, it will kill any kind of foot fungus or order too

Sentinel and witchy

Who knew it was gonna take vinegar for me to breathe again 👀

An apple a day

Still learning the big lessons

Feeling better but I hope it’s not that little burst of energy you get before you die

It took a weird ad about a home remedy foot soak to get me cured

And no, the water did not change a weird funky color

My skin immediately began to improve

And then my breathing

My lungs are clearing up 👀

My heart is feeling anew

I don’t know what to tell you

A fucking weird ad saved my life

And I was reading article after article about black holes and the multiverse at 2 am – it was one of then weird click-bait type ads you see

I didn’t click it or anything

It’s just a bunch of them ads you see following an article when you’re reading comments about something

And I’m not exaggerating about going into anaphylactic shock or the fact that I was actually nearing my mysterious death

Clearly needed a detox

I need to go shopping for the other ingredients to start drinking it so I’ll let you know how the drink goes

Again, if you don’t mix this shit right you can burn yourself

But my body has had nothing but positive response

And until I feel like I’ve expelled the devil, I will continue the routine of vinegar soaks, even if not as frequent

I love how baby soft my skin is again

And the fact that I can breathe again

Without a machine 👀

Edgar Allan Poe and John Jones are my spirit guides

John was a Mormon so they probably used vinegar to clean everything

Thanks for the tip right-side up, John

I love you

Forest

Why did you leave me in the forest
Now these lands are swamps
With soul sorest
Dead tree as prompts

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

I don’t know how to hang on to those who want to leave

I’m like a black hole with gravity to help them go

Weird dangerous events keep happening around me

Like glitches in the matrix

Like something keeps alerting me

I’m not understanding the messages/codes

The world is ending

This though I’m certain

But the 1% are racing to get off of this planet because Apophis is on her way to Earth

The Great Filter is among us

Earth is the hardest lesson in the galaxy to learn

Where will your soul be at your end

What level of consciousness are you stuck on

I’m in an alternate timeline

I’ve also known major events to happen before they’ve happened all my life and small events too

Are you asleep or part of The Great Awakening?

“Are you alive and have you been born”?

We will never be able to leave the galaxy or the solar system, not in this form

I love you!

Private Performers

They’re performers
But it’s a private show
No invitation
So I will never go

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

The amount of jealousy other women exhume from my existence is astounding

Maybe I’m the reason women have gray hair and not alcohol 😈

Y’all are performers but you don’t want anybody admiring what you do or your lifestyle

Being an angel has its disadvantages 👀

Can’t even be happy for others 👀

*rolls fucking eyes*

*goes away*

Constant Cover

Under a near constant cover of clouds
Spending time in the burrows avoiding crowds
Thunder is the echo from my heart where he pounds
Drowning all our sorrows from these vows

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

I love you! ❤️

I recently learned from a TikTok that many women have grey hair already in their early 30s (must drink alcohol) and that made me feel hella good to be nearly 43 with not one gray hair!

Should I leave a locket of my hair for you somewhere before I die? 👀

A secret drop off location?

Seems like it would only be fair since I got your book and all 👀

Do you want my pigtails when I die?

Clip clip

Leave in will 👀

I guess the lawyer will have one hell of a time hunting you down 👀

“She wanted you to have this”

Proceeds to hand you two lockets of hair 👀

“Man you sure were hard to find”

👀

Maybe I can leave a little poem buried in my locket 👀

Okay, so in an alternate universe somewhere that fucking happened because that’s how fucking weird I am, I left you a locket of my hair, how creepy, OK bye now

Edgar Allan Poe’s daughter signing off

👀

Searched

What happened to you, why did you leave?
The ocean fills with tears I grieve,
I searched for you ’til I found void,
I fell for you ‘cuz I’m not poised!

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

It feels weird to use full on punctuation in my poetry but one of the main reasons I stopped doing it was because someone from another country said it doesn’t translate well in a translator with punctuation and I took that whole heartedly into consideration, secondly poetry is supposed to be freeform and I like to just not use rules because there seems to be a lot of rules for there to not be any… (gaslighting is everywhere huh)

Path

Are you a vast void?
Or a continent overjoyed?
Are you an asteroid?
On a path of love destroyed?

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

Ready for my mysterious death

Might still get it with this clot lurking in my heart and a left lung not fully inflating

Explains why it hurts to breathe 😑

However, new fear unlocked: Aneurysms

Thanks for checking out my new TikTok! I really want to make more spoken word videos and I can record for 3 minutes now!

Been digging through poetry I’ve written in the last few years, just gonna start dropping them with or without views

I’m dying and my heart can give in any minute 😑

And I no longer have a levee for support

They’re all gone 😑

Alone

Slowly deleting every app from my phone
The ad personalization has been dezoned
Buried in the earth somewhere my bone
The only destination left is alone

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

Kind of, sort of, falling into oblivion

And making it hard for even God to find me 👀

How will Big Bro track me, if I go underground?

How can people silence me if I never make a sound? 👀

Gonna teach y’all how ghosting really works 👀

Living in my car soon 👀

Good luck finding me 👀

Zone of Avoidance

He’s the zone of avoidance
Darkness so thick
No clairvoyance
Light it travels quick
Set to destroy us

© Delia Ross. 2020 / @poeeternal

Witchy cosplay wig 🤪
If I had extremely thick black and grey long hair with bangs
I do my makeup and rarely do it the same
Cosplay wig!!!

Did you know that I am a Leo? Ruler/ leader of all the signs.

Facts!

Me burning for you in the dark

“Now you’re selling your body on the cheap” 👀

Oh my fucking God, stop the press, I’ve been called a whore again. 👀

He’s mad at me and now using that disgusting piece of shit ex of mine as a bomb to hurt me *rolls eyes* 🙄

Mark did scam me out of a lot of things, but my real love and heart he never got. He kept my pussy dry literally. Keep reading on to learn more 👀

(I went no contact from Mark – he posted on my blog when he got back with one of his exes, I didn’t go to The Chameleons blog – he came to mine. He’s a narcissist and I’d gone no contact but he was desperate for me to know – he’s desperate for me to love him. I don’t. I can’t stand Mark Burgess. He’s the plague and I want NOTHING to do with him. He never pays taxes, he lives rent free off the women he abuses. He’s a scumbag and writing music doesn’t give you the right to do the monstrous things he has done and continues to do. He’s a menace and needs burned at the stake, along with all the books and music. Erased from history is the only ending he deserves. Of course, he leads everyone to believe that the women are the problem even tho it’s the women running from HIM. And he moves from one relationship to the next. Claims true love every time. He taste like death. 🤮🤮🤮

I did a runner from Mark Burgess because he is the plague and you should stay far the fuck away from him.

I don’t like or love him.

I couldn’t even get sexually off from him

I couldn’t even get wet down there 😑

I don’t like Mark Burgess

I don’t love Mark Burgess

And you don’t get to act like you’re my best friend and then turn around and call me a whore just because I have a political fucking opinion about what’s going on in the world and I actually have a right to say something about what’s going on in the world because I’ve actually served my fucking country you piece of shit

Look at all this charming smooth talk via PM tho. You always wanted me to chat with yah, never did/would tho. Hell, you invited me into your home and offered to pay for my hotel.

But now publicly suddenly I am one of the worst things ever and a whore and I’m selling my body on the cheap

🧐

👇👇👇👇

👀

I never did give him what he wanted though- my time or my friendship and now look at him calling me a whore 👀 from inviting me and paying for my hotel to calling me a fucking whore 👀

He says I think the world owes me everything and I’m selling my body “on the cheap”

👀

But he was just inviting to pay for my fucking hotel room

👀

Now I’m a whore and he’s siding with that piece of shit Mark 👀

I am called a whore / you’d give me your dinner?

For the record, I don’t need anyone paying my hotel bills when I travel, I do that on my own.

I normally stay with my best friend who is a female – I’ve visited her in England twice staying with her 2 weeks on each visit.

I also helped with food and the electric and left her some moneyzzz cuz I’m not a complete bum.

She did not ask me to do this. Flights anywhere are expensive – and I’m happy to stay with my REAL FRIENDS when I visit if they invite me.

I’m not rich nor ever have been.

I was not born with a silver spoon.

I’ve always had to work 3 jobs to make ends meet.

I do not feel bad or guilty for stripping to eat or pay my bills.

You don’t get to invite me into your life and then call me a whore after and not get sandblasted.

He was always denied tho – as you can see – I don’t talk to anyone.

Prime example why

They all want to fuck me for free

Yet I’m called cheap

👀

Yea, I’m the problem clearly

Fuck off now

Run back to Mark Burgess

You’re both twats

Stop acting like you don’t have a porn addiction or that you are all holy and can call me your friend and then a “whore” (but only after you offered to pay for my hotel – I wasn’t a whore when you were offering to pay for my visit)

Never even had the desire to meet you – let alone for you to pay for my hotel.

“Whore” yup m’kay why? Because I do cosplay? Because I take off my clothes now during a pandemic because I’m disabled and need to pay my bills and we are in a RECESSION?

Because I blew through my life savings trying to stay afloat?

Because the jobs I was working paid under minimum wage and I have a college degree but can’t find work in my field due to the recession/furloughs/hiring freezes?

And those minimum wage jobs are taxed like hell and barely support cost of living (COLA) which is why people work multiple jobs to stay afloat?

Because they can’t save one fucking penny to get ahead.

Because nobody wants to actually support me or my dreams because they all want to “be my friend” so they can fuck me?

When I don’t want to fuck anybody –

Because I want to make babies with the love of my life and he recently bought me pizza?

Because I’m not actually a whore and there’s nothing wrong with sex workers.

I don’t actually “sell my body” 🧐

I don’t think anyone can actually “sell their body”. 🤔

If you mean “perform sex acts”, that isn’t anything I’m actually doing.

It’s called burlesque but I’m not very good.

I like to cosplay and roleplay tho cuz being an actor was always my dream, I still audition for parts (even reality TV shows), and I love getting to play dressup cuz I was always a Soldier/tomboy.

I don’t think what I am doing is sinful.

I’m trying to understand who I am as a human and a woman.

Not the part or role that everyone else wants me to play.

What I’m doing now is what I’ve always wanted to do.

Writing, photography, cosplay, guitar, it’s my thang.

The feedback I’ve been getting on my OnlyFans has improved my overall health and mental status / self-esteem.

I would say the feedback I have received has been priceless to my growth as a human and an artist.

There’s a lot of value on my OnlyFans and I’m trying to get better at my cosplay and my photography and I think it shows.

I appreciate your good feedback, your comments, likes, tips, gifts and subscriptions!

I also GREATLY appreciate the support on my Patreon as well!

You make this whore happy.

Isolation

I’m so isolated and shut off from the world that the maintenance dude said he was worried about me when I didn’t answer the door 👀

I actually thanked him because there’s no one checking in on me 👀

Just because I write doesn’t mean I small talk or gossip

I am not a socialite

I am a Soldier (not a civilian)

I am an introvert

I don’t like the state of anything in the world

I’m unhinged

I can’t even go buy an egg sandwich or a Coke in the can at the goddamn gas station without getting into fucking World War III because everybody wants to make $20 an an hour with a three dollar attitude and terrible work ethic

I was making over $25 an hour for nearly 8 years with the DOD but I sank with the financial fucking recession and the government hiring freezes and the government furloughs but you don’t give a fuck about that do you?

You don’t give a fuck that I had to eat up my life savings and my retirement savings just to get through this fucking pandemic!

You don’t give a fuck about that do you? Cause I didn’t buy your fucking book or I don’t act like your best fucking friend!

There are many books and CDs I would actually like to buy I just can’t at the moment because I live paycheck to paycheck and every fucking dollar goes to paying my main cost of living which I’m barely doing – I’m living under my means, but you don’t give a fuck about that do you cause I’m not tit for tat!

Fake fake fake!!!!!!!

I’m not dying on the street!!!

(My therapist is calling me today finally – they’ve been trying to reach me for a long time) 👀

I get to let my doctor know that I stopped disassociating for 5 minutes to check the news, and now I’m more disengaged and paranoid. 👀

I get to let him know that I almost had World War III with the gas station clerk. 👀

There’s something seriously wrong with the world 👀

Feel free to blame me – as long as I get to stay away

Put me back in my foxhole!!!! 👀

Give me my M16A2 rifle! 👀

I am still a Soldier! 👀

*Realizes she’s stuck on the Titanic because all the rich people have locked her on the bottom of the Titanic and now they’re hanging out on boats that could’ve had more people watching me sink*

👀

The reason I don’t check in on people is because I don’t have the social abilities to communicate currently. 👀

And the rare few people that I do decide to check in on, 98% of them give me a fucking attitude in return.

Because narcissism

👀

And I refuse to be manipulated or controlled by you and you’re fucking everywhere aren’t you

👀

I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t so I just want to be alone 👀

And I don’t wanna get to know you because you just want to ask for me for free nudes

👀

Or my hand in marriage 👀

I’m not interested in you 👀

I’m wholly obsessed with 2 dudes and I have never once talked to my therapist about that sort of behavior 👀

They don’t want anything to do with me 👀

But I’m like Bush how he was with Congress when they passed shit into law and Bush said I don’t care and then he did all those “signing statements” because voting means absolutely fucking nothing and you and I no longer have rights because we’ve moved into a fucking Hitler state hello hello hello

👀

Protege

I’m like his protege
Whispers in decay
Messages like ballet
Asks if I’m okay

Says I am babe
And I make his day
Take his sky from grey
Wants to see me slay

He points me to Broadway
They got the fee to pay
Says I outta play
I’m like his protege

© Delia Ross. 2021 / @poeeternal

Not all the messages in my inbox say “fuck you”. Some DM’s are pretty good too.

Thought I’d take a break from the negativity and reflect on that.

I got some fans out there. They’re not all enemies.

Not everybody wants me to die.

FYI.

Got news about how my dad died today. My dad wasn’t in the best health but the COD was natural/ atherosclerotic cardiovascular disease (so likely heart attack or stroke).

We are still dealing with legal matters, I’m mourning (he died last month in December).

I’m hoping I can get a workout in today and tomorrow and Sunday so I don’t feel like I’ve lost an entire fucking week but like it’s been a rough one.

I hate being depressed and I don’t get people who are depressed who actually have energy, I think those people are just discontent or bored with their life. That isn’t depression. If you can run a marathon, you aren’t depressed honey. Fatigue is the number one symptom. Welp. And crying. And thoughts of dying. The thought of checking the mail is like climbing Mount Everest.

I’m not lazy, I’m depressed. Where is my 6 foot hole so I can crawl into it. But could you put a heating pad down there cuz the Earth is kind of cold? And some Pink Floyd tunes?

I haven’t actually been listening to a lot of music. Or playing my guitar. But I stare at my guitar daily and I won’t put it in its guitar case because I’m hoping that I’ll play it if it’s out and I’ll even try to convince myself that I want to play my guitar but like the energy just isn’t there and there’s no joy or desire for anything.

Tacos. I desire tacos.

And a foot slave. So, I’m going to be bringing some foot fetish stuff to my onlyfans as well as some nude digiart because I love making digiart but have never actually done nude digi art of myself so I got some new OF goals. I am still planning that big vampire cosplay shoot for my OF too.

Can’t rush the art but time is of the essence…

I’m really excited about making some kinky Foot videos.

I have the cutest little feet and now they have a purpose!

I also have a shoe fetish! I love buying shoes but I prefer being barefoot it’s a conundrum I know but now my shoes have a fucking purpose too especially in this quarantine where I can’t do anything with them!!

I’m not really interested in making like Tik Tok videos of me changing my outfits.

And I tried to go live on Twitch via my computer and the audio is all kinds of messed up and I don’t know why.

So, I’ll be attempting to do an Instagram livestream where I read some of my top poetry from my website.

I haven’t started hooping yet either and I’m kind of bummed about that.

I’ll try to keep making baby steps towards everything I want to do because I’ve been mourning pretty bad behind-the-scenes.

But I’m feeling so overwhelmed like I need to take two or three days to just not do anything at all.

I’m dealing with a lot of chemical imbalances in my body.

Hormones.

I’m moody. Edgy.

Is it normal to be this edgy after losing a parent? Me and my dad were pretty close but we also had a pretty rocky relationship.

It hadn’t really been rocky though, I mean since I was a kid honestly.

I just saw him not even 2 years ago for my birthday. But somewhere in between that time and him dying I got mad at him and pushed him away like I’ve done everybody else.

I had actually been contemplating emailing him for his birthday but he died just a few days before his birthday so I didn’t get a chance to make it right.

I still believe that 6 minute rare rainbow event was my dad saying goodbye. He was one hell of a B3 organ player, played guitar, sang. Gigging was his life. I got to see his final gig. His “great gig in the sky”. He loved Pink Floyd near as much as me. And I could play Pink Floyd as much as I wanted around my dad which is cool because parents and kids usually don’t listen to the same music so.

Sorry to put all this on you, I usually put it on my therapist.

Or, to the next person who wants to step on my precious fucking feet.

Welp. I am small but mighty. Like Napoleon (although I think I’m taller than he was). That’s a weird fact to remember about someone, so I had to go Google it just to see and it says he was 5’6″, which means we were actually the exact height. But, I am taller in boots and heels, to be fair.

Awe shit, and he’s a leo! No wonder I like him lol. Was he banned from France? What did he do? I can’t remember off hand!!

Has anyone ever been banned from your country? Or here in America? I don’t recall. It might be a blessing to get banned now. KIDDING. JOKES.

Isn’t New Zealand covid free or something? How do you get banned from a country? What country takes you in? What in the actual fuck. Could you imagine being banned from the planet? You’re no longer allowed on Earth, you’re going to Mars. Well fuck, when are we leaving?

Speaking of Mars, got my NASA boarding pass for the upcoming Mars landing!

My official boarding pass for the upcoming rover landing to Mars. It’s also nice that we’re starting to have more successes landing on Mars than we are failures. Which might account for the planned manned missions. Woit. Gotta stay alive for this. Right? This is the kind of roses that makes me really excited. Lifeeeee universe nerdy things 😍

Y’all know, I actually DID apply to live on Mars with Mars One in 2013 and there were over 200,000 people who applied and not only did I get a call back but I made it all the way into round 2 I made it through all of my medical examinations until I dropped out for personal reasons. But, Mars y’all. Mars. It’s a love of mine. And I did lots of interviews when I was in the running! I was actually a candidate to live on Mars. I had folks laughing til they saw me on the news and in the paper and then my command sergeant major said his son was interested in going too! But in uniform at the Golden Corral when he first learned about the Mars thing, he kept looking at me from across the table saying “you’re going to die Ross, you’re going to die, they don’t have food on Mars”. He knows how much I love food and let’s be honest he didn’t want to lose one of his best soldiers. But after his son learned about it, and they saw me on the news, he was quite proud of me. 😊 He even brought a little clip from a newspaper he found of me mentioned. I’m sure it’s buried around here somewhere with all my awards and medals that would take up probably an entire wall or more.

My Mars One profile: https://community.mars-one.com/profile/34d6acb7-ade0-4c59-b462-f41d636512d7

And feel free to stalk my old Facebook Mars One Candidate page, it’ll have all sorts of links and videos. Hope shit still works. I’m ancient. LOL https://m.facebook.com/deliatomars/

I deployed to Kuwait and Iraq (not Afghanistan) but it was a pretty fun interview!! Just wish I hadn’t invited my evil ex along but at least they spelled his name wrong *evil laugh* https://youtu.be/yupJHGGuMU0

And it’s not true about stuff being on the internet forever because I lost stuff. Important stuffs. That I believed would be around forever…

This conversation went EVERYWHERE. LOOK SQUIRREL!

Connection

I’m having trouble with connection
Like leaving the light on
Keep losing affection
Even with light gone

Face changing complexion
Forgiving his one wrong
When needing perfection
Not facing delights dawn

Still failing inspection
Why hands are withdrawn
Evading the question
Then lying with a yawn

Been nursing obsession
I’m sleeping on his lawn
Or chasing rejection
While writing the wrong song

© Delia Ross. 2020

To everyone who followed me and unfollowed me in 2020, I got your back… 👍

Goodbye 2020. Fuck you.

Hold

How do you hold onto an ocean current?
There are continents pulling to get away.

Sunspots are forming from your grip.
These tides rise as high as a moon.

The seas are calling and beckoning.
Can you not hear our cries?

The backdrop is hope.
It went missing from the wide blue sky.

How do you tell heaven to kneel?
Your indigo is a ruse.

Still, are there not galaxies forming under your will?
We collide and bruise.

© Delia Ross. 2020 / @poeeternal

A bit of a Frankenstein poem for you; half non-rhyme, half rhyme- unintentional.

Thanks for checking out my work and supporting indie artist!! I appreciate!


My LinkTree will take you places: https://linktr.ee/poeeternal


Sad Gurl Diary (Episode Non-stop crying) Trig warn?

An ocean of longing and salt lines
Tears are translucent
Still need you tho I waded out too far

I love u. What’s a girl to do? Been crying for the one since I was like ten. Cuz life is shite. But it’s like we’re world’s apart. 💔

I’m in the deep end and I’m caught in the tide!!! 😰
Trying to learn how to live and breathe without you.
Not doing a very good job 😭
An ocean of sadness. The end is all inside us.

I’m Not Okay

I disassociate
Long hours to avoid the ache
Your unholy wait
Thick iron gate


You painting over the marks I make
With the masks I take
Smiling, saying “everything’s okay”
We perfect the fake

Laughter fills the day
My fang will shake
I’m not ok
Or have words to say

More laughter
I’m after
More laughter, I’m after

More laughter
I’m after
More laughter, not like her

© Delia Ross. 2020 / @poeeternal

The person responsible for the stones and sacrifices.
Blood vials and hungry vices.
Wrong directions cost ultimate prices.
Smiling. Our safest lying devices.
The sanity will drive you insane. Thanks for another lesson daddy Poe.

*laughs insanely*

*dies on fucking street*

No Entry

The no entry signs are posted still they stray
I’ve stated there’s no hope yet they pray
I’ve mentioned I am starving they won’t pay
I need some time alone can’t get a day

Nosferatu but call me Vampyre D (Vampy D). And I prefer solitude.

Thanks for checking out and supporting my work! Everything I create is original content at @poeeternal.

Thanks for supporting independent writers and artists! ❤

© Delia Ross. 2020


If you dig my creativity and would like to make a donation, you can via my PayPal here: https://www.paypal.me/deliaross

Or, donations can be made securely on CashApp at $poeeternal: https://cash.app/$poeeternal

For exclusive poetry and spoken word, check out my Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal

Keep up with me on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/poeeternal

I follow back on Twitter and you can follow me here: https://www.twitter.com/poeeternal


Croon

I love you like midnight
Piercing off the moon
How even your cold shoulder
Can still make the night swoon

I love you like the darkness
Passing by at noon
How even when it’s hopeless
You make the cold wind croon

© Delia Ross. 2020

All this hair is like a furnace in Florida
One Freckle for every reason why I love you
Always lost in translation…

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Lonely May I Rot

Beautiful though I’m not, my heart is made of gold
And lonely may I rot, I’m too precious to hold

Feeling underwhelmed
Disappointment; a forest growing
Distance; the road I’m going
Condemnation; the cold wind blowing

If you dig my writing, you can support my advertisement free blog by subscribing to my Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal

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The Lows

I’m sick of concrete ceiling skies
His tireless little alibis
The lows that come when I need to rise
The feeling that I’m out of tries

I’m wanting just a bit more luck
And wouldn’t hurt to have a buck
But mostly never give a fuck
Depression hit me like a truck

© Delia Ross. 2020

I’m moody and withdrawn. Therefore, I’ve been neglecting your blogs and friendships (and my life), I’m sorry.


If you dig my writing, you can support me on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal

Keep up with me on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/poeeternal

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The Signs

The signs all point to hollow
There is no quarter for solitude
There is no pill to change the view
The signs all point to sorrow

The signs all point to narrow
As one by one I’m torn in two
While nothing gets me over you
The signs all stop at follow

© Delia Ross. 2020

6/3/2020

6/3/2020
6/3/2020

If you dig my writing, you can support me by subscribing to my campaign (so I can keep writing and buy bread too): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal

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His Kingdom

I once could feast on him but only from afar
There are continents that separate our hope
His smooth head has been polished by time
I long to run my fingers over his kingdom
But my feet are not wanted on his land
That doesn’t stop the stars falling every night for his love
The moon perched on fantasy
His poems are auras in my soul
God made it so
The storms he brew in me
Where will the rain fall now?
Who will wash your feet?
The way I’ve done after you’ve murdered me
An outcast for mercy
Forgiveness I cried
Gullibility my only ally
The gardens do not grow the way they used to
Not since he banished hope
All welcome but you need not apply
You’re not worth my time
The moment I died

My halls are haunted now
By dreams that never came
And all the things we could have done
Are all that do remain

© Delia Ross. 2020

His poems are auras in my soul

I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal


Clouds

Where am I to go when your words are a maze
They lead to heaven and purgatory
Why do you leave pieces of your heart like breadcrumbs for me to find
Did you mean to hold me in contempt
The way starlight holds in my love for you
I die over and over here
What do you do with the pieces that break off me while carrying you
A casualty of two
You say you want me gone but won’t let me leave
I’ve climbed every inch of these walls
Blood holds them up now
Coagulated and full of tears
I almost saw the sun disappear forever
But now confusion fills these halls
I would die a thousand ways for you
And have
Sometimes my clouds block the view
Oh, and I’m calling too
“Over here, over here, see”
But too many clouds wouldn’t let you do
You stay so far from reach like the moon
Getting close, getting closer, gone
We live in the same galaxy
But my escape velocity is you
I nearly escaped but like an eclipse you appeared
I can hear the trumpets bellow
Or maybe my heart pounding under the mass of you
Waking me from the nightmares you haunt
I scream and hear endless echoes
“Please just let me die”
And die I do only to be born again crying
“Please just let me die”
I don’t know what’s dream or reality anymore
But can hell be any more real than now?
You stripped me of my wings
You plucked me of my feathers
You tell me I’m no good
You say I’m broken anyhow
Then kick me while I’m down
You grab me by the throat
Drag me up with your claws in my vein
You say I stench of love
And spit in my face
You scold me and tell me there’s nothing to love here
So I believe you and stop loving myself
Please just let me die…

© Delia Ross. 2020

I would follow you unto the ends of hell and do, but I can turn around too.

Haunting

Are you around in secret
Haunting me out of sequence
For love there is no treatment
And pain I seem to keep it
For you are my weakness

My heart you just keep squeezing
Haunting me throughout the seasons
Though my heart is always freezing
And why I love you there’s so many reasons
I can’t fight the endless feelings
My heart is yours for treason

© Delia Ross. 2020

I feel like I’ve loved you a lifetime and yet a lifetime is still not long enough to love you.

Love in a time of quarantine
Could go on loving you forevers. Forever yours.
If only forever wasn’t so far away. And you.

I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal


Scars

The scars on my veins a reminder of pain
The courage just to continue each day
Cuz living with depression is living under chain
You may call me crazy but I’m rather quite sane

The days are heavy and I haven’t any strength
Every foot forward the deeper I sink
The treatments are barbaric and push me to the brink
Every other year I’ve got another kind of shrink

© Delia Ross. 2020

Sending some love hehe (in case you forgots)
Hi’s
I had therapy today and I don’t regret it.
My first ponytail since the 1600s. Some of my biggest mistakes were haircuts. And ponytails?

I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal


Debts

Been lost in a quarantine daze
Been circling these halls like a maze
Reaching for forgiveness but there’s been delays
Blood and tears the only currency that pays

When will I be released from his prison
When will all be forgiven
When will eyes see a life worth living
When will the stars again be risen

Wondering when my debts to him will all be paid
Reason only comes at the tips of blades
But he was there when I needed aid
Tell me how much a hero really weighs

When will the invisible no longer be hidden
Is there ever a time the truth is written
Will there ever be a day he finally listens
When will his anger be out of commission

© Delia Ross. 2020


I would give my life for him. My knight. Indebted forever. Loves.



I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal?
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Maps To Purgatory

The silence rips across my back
Like a whip of time
My soul swells with whelps
As I feel his belt

How he punishes me
Saline tears, darkest fears
Maps to purgatory

Forgiveness a dark corridor
Making sure that he blocks the door
The words he won’t speak leaves me a foreigner
A soldier in the cold without armor

© Delia Ross. 2020

Completely isolated and alone, don’t expect him to care.

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The Great Divide

It’s running deeper in my vein
I’m constantly crying your name
I wonder if you do the same
This feeling I cannot explain

It’s deeper than any ocean
I’m drowning on every emotion
It’s like my soul for you was woven
I’ll never escape this devotion

Isolated in ruin
My hand is always losing
This pain has no undoing
I wish you could see I’m just human

I call it the great divide
This love I cannot define
A story I cannot rewrite
I feel like I may not survive

© Delia Ross. 2020

Petite little thang. Big heart.

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I’m Okay

For those who care, and for those who are asking, I’m okay. Practicing social distancing by keeping six feet and wearing a mask and gloves when I must + staying home. My community is not allowed any visitors for 30 days and my town is still in shutdown/isolation/quarantine mode. I hope you are okay too. Sending love. And a bit of sunshine from the Sunshine State. xoxo

I have an entire galaxy of freckles on me.
I come flawed with natural hazel eyes. No one’s ever given a shit about my eye color though. Or me in general. I’m too petite and all the guys want thick girls or Barbie’s. Or modified with plastic and I prefer to feel things. So I am 100% all natural and rare. No longer dye my hair either. No fake nails, eyelashes, tans, breast, or hair. Just me. And I’m okay with me. I think it takes a lot of courage to be real these days. Peace out, yo.

Round and Wound

The emptiness settles over me like fog rolling over hills and mountain tops
And space, there’s not enough to keep him from my thoughts
He’s got the world in his hands while my soul it sits and rots
Round and wound he tunes us up like we are clocks
And reason not as simple as connecting dots
So doubt fills my head now thick as clots

© Delia Ross. 2020

Mandatory social distancing; an introverts wet dream

If you dig my writing, you can support my blog by subscribing to my Patreon here (please & thank you): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal

Keep up with me on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/poeeternal/

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