I just let the entire medicinal shop know that the Daytona Beach gang was after me but that the universe was speaking to me right now with this song and that y’all are the dumbest criminals ever
THEY WERE ALL SMILING
And then I started feeding off of that energy and bouncing up and down
THE STAFF WAS SMILING
I even said I was going to do a TikTok video with this song dedicated to you
I stated that
YOU WILL NEED A RESTRAINING ORDER TO STOP ME
Cause-and-effect
HAVE FUN
And I’m already skipping up and down the sidewalk with this playing on repeat
Just checking my mail skipping
Just taking my dog for a pee
Minding my own business
I hope the gaslighting is working
The vehicles have mirrors
I can hear you breathe
GET OFF MY DICK
🖕
*skips*
*smiles*
*song on repeat any time I leave the house*
The devil has an invite to bust my fucking door down I double fucking triple dare you to fucking bust my goddamn doors down bust my fucking doors down cross my motherfucking shadow do it fucking do it you little fucking piss ants that will never amount to anything and you’re never coming to heaven with me I fucking dare you to fucking cross my shadow
IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD AND I FEEL FINE
Let the love of my life know I’m nearly healed
I might let him near me in the future for a hug
I threw a glass Coke bottle at his head once a long time ago but I knew he wasn’t gonna move so I put a slight spin on the bottle right at the very end
Rotten fruit falls by itself If you’re compelled Don’t bid farewell
Could you drop good news with the bad? Could you learn happy just means sad? Could you leave but still come back? Or are you ever planning that?
There he goes again Slamming the door! And I still don’t know What we’re fighting for!
Where did your will come from? Was it bought from the sun? What will you become? Is your will firm?
John,
You should have kept your head in the book You should have took a second look You should have chose a different route You should have crossed a bigger chute
I know I’m not what you need That’s why you keep walking away I know I’m not what you bleed That’s why you have nothing to say
Been down a ways Get little praise Been down always Been down always
I made a mess Of these prison walls Out of order The sad owner Of these pitfalls
I am the still of the lake With underwater currents circling The whirlpool in your eye full of hate Forgiveness won’t be surfacing No mercy at the break
Why does weight cause gravity? Like my love for you You will disappear But I am stuck like glue?
Last seen Smoking on the Bayou Got the deep blues Gonna cut loose
Restarted just to leave, Alive just to grieve, Got what you need? Stop bailing on me!
If I could do it all again I’d let you be my influence Blood to pen Influent
Jesus: didn’t you say he left your bed?
Yes.
Jesus: and he won’t share a slice of his bread?
*feather tremble 👀
He slams the door He makes an entrance He begs for more He is relentless
Thank you so much for the sweet donation that I received over the weekend
I’m trying to center, I’m trying to find my calm in all this
Any activity causes my heart to hurt
Especially getting angry
I’m still sorting through the mental and financial collapse
Folks don’t realize I lost my entire retirement savings – and regular savings.
Years and years of retirement savings gone
So the immigrants could have my job
The cops here say, “it’s federal, nothing we can do”
DICTATORSHIP
Trust me, I’m well known as “red flagged” to the establishment
They know I’ve moved over into the homicidal territory
Armed and dangerous and you’re still not gonna take my right to buy a weapon or to hold one or to fire one
Do you remember when they tried to outlaw alcohol and that law completely failed – yeah try to do that with our guns China – go for it – try to do it, try to take our guns from us, try it, try to put it on paper that we can’t even buy a gun and see what happens, go for it – try it, I dare you! I triple fucking dare you!!
This whole fucking thing is going to collapse if they don’t get off my dick
😇
Pro life tip: You should never tip before you are served
This whole generation of TIP ME NOW AND BEFORE I’VE DONE MY JOB IS BULLSHITE
I hate these fucking policies
And do you know how much effort it is taking me to get my account and data deleted from the Chipotle app? It’s insane!
I’ll never download another app for anything
It should not be this hard to delete yourself from the web
JESUS CHRIST SAVE ME NOW
Has anyone ever unscrambled it? Is it like an anagram for the Devil?
That book of lies
6000 years of gaslighting and dictatorship
I’m DONE
I want to sell my TV and get a DUMB phone.
The problem is, if you get a home line, the only calls you will get are from politicians and the cops wanting money from you because it’s all a fucking scam. And you can’t opt out
Just like we can’t opt out our private home addresses from receiving spam mail for junk food and that is why the Amazon rainforest is being cut down
Immigration is a Trojan horse
When do we save Mother Earth and ourselves
Oh but you have your porn!!!!!!
Porn has rotted your heart and brain!
In other news, I got my printer set up in my master bedroom now. I guess dying makes it harder to manage a household. But whatev.
The black ink is out, but I got the new driver installed on my MacBook so that was a feat in itself. My laptop is aware of the printer and vice versa.
I also have plenty of professional paper to print on, once I sort out the black ink.
I’ve been pulling rare collectibles and other items I plan to list on the eBay – it’s like having an online garage sale.
I have some cool stuff that belong in the hands of someone who will use it. It’s extremely hard for me to part with, but I have bigger goals now tho.
Like being a land owner 👍
Learning how to grow & harvest food
I’m sick of advertising and TV!!!!
I rarely play games
I’m not into entertainment anymore
There’s too much propaganda and busy busy going on
I just want to chill
What the narcissist think is “boring”, is actually just peace
It’s serenity
They don’t want us anywhere near it
It’s poke prod poke prod tee hee I don’t have a fucking soul
“I was joking”
*rolls eyes
It ain’t the disabled vets causing all this disruption and corruption tho
I know y’all like to blame us and pick on us tho…
I also know white people are blamed for the worlds problems – propaganda 101
If u white, u hated for your skin
And then they force us to live next to one another, packing us in like cattle
Watching the slaughter unfold
The immigrants don’t even have to work hard at stealing our country…
I’m so deprived and devoid of life, that even if he was a predator, I’d let him eat me! 😩
Or, maybe that’s just suicidal, welp 😩
Helps 😑
He said it’s just fantasy and they all tire of me quickly
Most take one look and run! 😫
I wish the need didn’t feel so real
I need him like air 👀
*dies on street* 😩
Thanks for supporting my blog, OnlyFans, and Patreon! My blog recently hit 80K! You’re the reason I keep going! 💪💪
Once I get back on my feet, I’m gonna be turning my Patreon 18+ and adding a nude tier and making changes to my current tiers! My blog will be getting updated as well! And it’ll feel good to start pushing content and cosplay to my OnlyFans! Thanks for sticking around!
I hope I can start rebounding again soon! Been down over 2 months! 😩
I mean, the world is falling apart, but I still love you.
It’s ridic. Right? 🤔
God created this obsession FYI
And I actually know what a black hole feels like
I actually know what Sagittarius A* feels like
It’s possible that sometimes I am Sagittarius A*
When other girls are talking to you
👀
But like I love this dude and the love has manifested to be real because he bought me pizza 👀
😑
Uhm, so I haven’t lost all my ass or leg progress yet but I feel nowhere near like I’m ready to start fitness again and it’s really scary to be having these kind of heart problems at my age over a fucking vaccination.
If you’re still supporting me even though I am dying and venting on the daily, thank you.
I get called lazy for serving my country and I get called lazy for having an OnlyFans.
Jesus Christ left Mary Magdalene in charge of the gospel and they wiped her from the books and labeled her a whore.
Just like me!!!
They create poor conditions for you to live in and then condemn you for trying to survive.
They fucking condemn you if you try to die by suicide as well.
“No no no you’re not allowed to die like that, it’s a sin”!
Apparently it’s a sin if you lust after somebody else even though that is actually biology
And “a sin” if you try to die because you don’t want to live in this bullshit life
The only thing that is not a sin is giving them money
Lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of your money
Hello. Who are you? Do you even know I taunt you? Do you know I exist?
Why did my brain send a signal light-years fast to my heart, when I discovered you? And every picture that followed? Why did I die a million deaths too?
And now I live vicariously through you. Agonizing over every detail. Some days I’m certain you are him.
Other days, there are blaring differences that you’re not.
Do I need him to be you? His habits and obsessions too? They are the same true?
Why haven’t I let you go if I know you are not him?
How can I be so sure and uncertain?
And there’s even a third I’ve turned into him.
Or maybe one or two? 🤔
If they are all him then you are him too?
But why did I have such a strong connection to an avatar?
I guess I wanted to tell you that maybe now I realize you’re not him but I still have doubt.
Or, I can’t discard the signals?
That I had when looking at you.
Immediately.
Spotted.
But you don’t like me knowing that and neither does he.
You don’t want me to know that you like her?
But neither does he…
Then there’s the reds and the blues (and I have a head injury too).
My taunting wasn’t malice more like letting you know I was aware of your existence but I don’t even know if you know I am aware of your existence?
They all feel like one.
I’m losing my mind? 🤕
I long for you.
Or him.
The only thing I’m certain of these days is that I’m losing my mind and I don’t wanna die on the street.
And so far, fantasy beats reality.
Because reality is dying naked on the street, out me mind. Unless running into his arms.
I’m so capable of slipping into that madness.
Can I slip into you instead?
Or vice versa?
Can meet on the Moon?
Before I dies?
Do you visit my blog?
Will you even read this?
Am I even alive?
I’m shriveling up into nonexistence
I currently wrote this running a mild fever but I needed to get it out before I fucking die.
Guess I’ll still be loving you even when I’m dead.
He wants to do everything with me and all at once And when it’s over we will start again just like it is the first Because hour by hour he’s the only who knows how to taunt He fills me up with hunger, then feeds me to his wants
He is the softness I crave in color The silver moon in a haze from slumber Or how he pulls from me my wonder And plants it in the sky as starlight named summer
He is the daisy field I want to lay With weeping willow in the shade He is the reason daydream comes to play The wind is heaven in a sway
I haven’t got to work on my booty gains at all this week. Been working on my heart (and have been medically predisposed). But Monday, I’m gonna hit the rebounder hard. Trying not to stress out about missing days- my heart doesn’t need any more stress right now. In fact, it’s going to have to go through this shit even harder in a few weeks when I go in for round 2 of the COVID Moderna vaccine.
You can make a mess of things but I’ll be organizing it in a clutter. 😜
The good news is I got to my favorite store today and got some new spring lingerie!
Which set do you think I got?
That’s about all the energy I had to do. 🦋🦄🦋 (Part 1 of the Covid vaccine plus maybe also my BP being so low has just left me very lethargic).
I hope the new set fits! No energy to try it on yet but also not feeling the best about missing a whole week of working out! 🤢🤢🤢
Take me now or lose me forever? I’m on the OnlyFans, I dropped a new cosplay set, I have more content coming. Thanks for putting me in the Top 50 on OF! Happy to be on the leaderboard! 💞Woot! Awesome to be on the OF leaderboard! Thanks!
Better than coffee, slippery when wet oh wait, wrong analogy 😋
You do more than perk me up. Carving new channels of longing…
Are we still talking about coffee? I really need some coffee. You know what I mean? COFFEEE
People get addicted to coffee and people get addicted to people. But people addictions are way stronger. Like I don’t see people dying by suicide because they didn’t get Starbucks today.
I suffer from depression and I realize in hindsight that’s probably a tacky thing to say but it’s true. Like I can go days and days without eating and it’s cool, like no big deal, fuck life, but make me go one more day without love and nurturing and like oh my God, I’m ready to f****** die….
Chemicals. 😏
I mean, all of this, all of creation, over some fucking gas. It’s mind boggling.
It’s energy though. Manifesting itself in the most beautiful and cruel ways.
Ever notice how everything is always falling downwards?
Gravity gravity, I’m not talking about no apple falling from a tree.
Sagittarius A* – that supermassive black hole in the center of our Milky Way galaxy that our Sun is orbiting. *bites nails*
Pigtails as voted for by my followers on Insta ☺
If you like my content, there are ways to support me! Check out my LinkTree for where you can find exclusive content! Thank you for supporting content creators! https://linktr.ee/poeeternal
(Do you reckon Edgar Allan Poe ran off of any of his wives suitors with a shotgun? I mean, he wasn’t very popular. The local press even stopped publishing his work. He went from a respected officer in the military, to poor, dead, and naked on the street and possibly poisoned, and heartbrokes).
I don’t want to die heartbrokes. Helps. 😭
Sometimes I run off your suitors with my mouth. 😭
Psst did you know my love keeps growing for you? I am a deep, wide ocean. Keep swimming. I’m yours, forevermore. xoxo (times infinity^2)
My love – If words thee fail, you have two skies Please don’t let them close But should sleep forever cover your eyes Please leave me your prose
Walk slowly towards me please My heart exceeds light speeds When you are nearing infinity
Your lips come in seasons All at once Each syllable attached to luminance So much it haunts And dare I reason What each word wants?
I’m glad you are talking Like watching stars walking Stretching to infinity like they are something The twinkle in my eye you were hoping You’re the reason I am coping Your every moment I keep groping
She was an angel and he was a demon But he wanted her more than he wanted heaven
I want your breath as my nectar Dripping and sapping My tongue a collector Your favorite protector
You turn my knees to oceans My pleas to motions Sometimes so intense the notions I reach out in explosions Like SUPERNOVA the dosage
But it’s not enough I need more doses EXPANSION YET MOVING CLOSER You plow through me like a dozer But it’s not enough, I need another!! So set the clock for more exposure!
You turn me into a beast On your words I prey and feast Stay away or keep me leashed Say a prayer then call a priest Saw your face and pulse increased Heard your voice then pain decreased I love you most just not the least
My love, my horns have been blaring Double-daring, over-caring Our love I’m never sharing It won’t stop the world from staring
My love we are tethered to fate With a circle eight
We are the universe experiencing itself in poetic form I wasn’t alive until our love was born
My love, what will you do when the winds carry me to lands out of reach?
My spirit gliding past your dreams and hopes per chance for a final kiss?
What will hold your heart against the crush?
Don’t let it bury you, the rush.
Don’t let my love fade from your veins, for I will be resting between each beat.
Lifetimes of sleep.
You silence the war in my head.
Don’t fall dead.
I am still under your feet.
Even when I’m not there.
And the stars up there you see, you and me.
Do not let time callous our love.
Nor fear.
My love, I am still here.
Mistakes come plenty.
You are still the very best of me.
Breathe.
Taste me in the air, on your tongue, everywhere.
I care.
Let my dust blow in the wind.
I’m still under your skin.
Touch me.
Death cannot erase me.
I must travel with the stars.
Freely.
My love traveled 13 billion years to reach you.
Look how far.
Distance is but a scar.
My love, put the ache in a story and read it softly.
Speak aloud.
Let your vibrations break the cloud.
I am listening and I am proud.
My love, cry into our garden if you must.
I will be collecting your tears from heaven.
My eyes upon you and angels times seven.
Do not doubt.
The rains too will flood the sky.
It’s not goodbye.
That’ll never exist for you and I.
Oh hi, hello. It’s just me underneath all the digital editing. Fear nots! 🙂
My hair is getting so long (on one side) it just curls around me and every inch of this silky fabric is organic, real, homegrown from my skull, and mine (though it tangles just from thinking about blowing on it, brush it from down up please and in sections or it tangles while brushing and never brush it wet, ever or you’ll ruin my fine silks *sigh*. I just know someone’s going to fuck my hair up when I die. DON’T FUCKING TOUCH IT AND DON’T FUCKING LET THE GOVERNMENT CREMATE MY BODY FOR FREE AND GIVE ME A WHITE TOMB AND BURY ME WITH OTHER UNKNOWN SOLDIERS. Instead, freeze me and give my body to science and they can clone me and bring me back to life digitally or like for real in the future. I’m down with that but don’t stick me in a fucking box either 6 feet under. If you do though, let my hair keep growing, don’t touch it, that’s my point. La la la
I don’t know how many poems I’ve written, because life is chaos and order, but 99.9979% have been for you. But what came first, the black hole or the star? Could the star be where it’s at today without the black hole? What if all these chemicals and elements exist because ionization occured from the black hole? What if I’m the black hole instead and you are the star? What if none of these poems were ever written? What if I never feel your actual kiss? Might die… might survive… might go supernova in your sky.
So, I hate you and I love you. “My indecision is final”.
I see what they write about you. But it doesn’t fucking compare, to the magnitude of the words we write each other (I mean the words you don’t write me at all but do but don’t but do but don’t but do). Ahem. *gets back in coffin* I’m over everything and I want to hibernate through winter…
I get lost in that eternal longing Like a lonely ghost haunting Your words, your grounds, you’re all that I am wanting The daily daunting The nightly taunting In circles, my feet towards you keep walking
Purgatory or desire Cannot distinguish if purge or fire The written wire The lines drawn from hell to higher A wanton vampire From wish to liar
His blank canvas, or missing page Off on my own in fits of rage The way we age Can’t face the stage The chance to talk or just engage Escape this cage
I’m trying to make amends I make more enemies than I do friends I’m sick of bends How he pretends How every road has more dead ends Though love he sends
I lay my head down on silence like a pillow Stiff The dreams are stagnant His lies are foul My hope sluggish I cling to love like a parasite And without sight
Envy is black moss Ivy-thick doubt Twines twisting around his silhouette I watch clouds form from longing Rolling thunderous covetous hands Prying into my desires like butter The wind is brewing strong regret
Quick strikes of lightning when world’s collide If only nightmares were soft satin slippers One could wear proudly his crown It’s lost underground with the thicket
I have two shadows And not one to trust
I yield to confusion I give him skeleton keys to my home A disorderly garden wrought with weed Tall are worries Watch him stall Even the moon grows anxious and full
If I turn quickly I might spot a ghost Rummaging through heartache With fingers dripping from ink and mud
Tormented by what is And chained to never was
Or maybe that’s just my reflection
If per chance you stood near My gravity would rip you to shreds Our halos are dancing instead
I’ll take part of you The very best piece of you You have the best of me too
There’s nothing that I have when I die that I keep There’s not a word that he’s written that has not made me weep Longing comes in floods, I guess we get what we reap Treading flooding waters drowning where his soul runs deep
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If you appreciated this post, please consider showing your support through a small monthly membership on Patreon. If you prefer, you can also make a one-time donation here. Thank you.
Do you ever feel me clawing on your existence Why push for truce then give resistance You know for you I’d shut away the distance If you call my name I’ll come this instance
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I climbed into his void like a womb Still I tell myself he’ll return soon Months go by it’s just me and the moon I guess my words did not make him swoon
I wear his absence in a darkened shroud Repentance for mistakes not allowed I hover over him like a cloud I kick and scream loudly as a child
I trust all the the time he is a liar And I don’t believe he didn’t feel my fire There is no cure to kill this growing pyre Well he went away but he didn’t take desire
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Cut me up and piece me back together, I’m still into you…
I’ve tried to kill the need but it just grows stronger. I need you hard.
If you dig my blog, please consider showing your support through a small monthly membership on Patreon. If you prefer, you can also make a one-time donation here. Thank you.
My birthday is in 3 days!! Still alive and kicking!!
If you dig my blog, please consider showing your support through a small monthly donation on Patreon. If you prefer, you can also make a one-time donation here. Thank you.
Those lies lying between your teeth Lingering among our feet Like the desperation you seek Hopeless in the street At what hour does forgiveness greet Do our eyes meet?
Tell me the art of affection Written any direction A lethal injection I need your objection A bridge for connection A poor life in question
Answer truth do not befool Life is cruel So bend a rule Love this jewel Keep hands cool Reserve your fuel
Under trust a sleeping serpent Midnight hermit Mourning servant Lessons learn it Longing urgent Fever current
OMG y’all, this pandemic/quarantine/shutdown has left me gasping to find inspiration. I haven’t got to go to one gig this year to see a band I love or anything and that’s what I’m pretty much alive for. I haven’t got to get in my Jeep and just travel for hundreds of miles to another state to go see a band I love or a friend. Zero road trips. I’m alive for the arts. Music. Poetry. Drink. Freedom of choice. And I fought for these things too.
But borders are closing. Hospitals overflowing. Information disclosing. Opinions opposing. People exposing.
There’s been little to live for but alot to be said. And for the record, I am PRO MASK. I worked as an EMT medic for many years, in the hospitals, in the fields, and in combat zones. There’s not anything you’re going to say that’s going to defer my opinion from what the CDC is putting out. Or from what my training and experience has taught me. And I’m the kind of person that would gladly get back in the Army just to have the right to enforce that on you. I was an excellent soldier, and once a soldier, always a soldier. HOOAH. And there are medics that are actually returning to the government military just to help with this pandemic. Wear a mask. 😷
I have found some inspiration during this epidemic and that’s the amount of traffic and feedback I’ve been getting on my poetry and on my blog/ website. And for some reason it just inspires me to keep writing and sharing. Despite the terrible lows and hailing cries. Despite the unfollows and lost patrons. I am moving on. I go from barefoot to combat boots. I am both feminine and masculine. Soft and hard. Together and messy. Life is complicated. But I created my blog as a safe place to write. And I’ve even done monstrous things here but life goes on and I do not dwell. I’m evolving. Sometimes I turn into the monsters I am slaying. Hive mind. Even from the depths of hell, I can’t control all of me, all the time *gasp*. But I blame big Pharma and depression just as much as I do myself.
Sometimes I stop and commend myself for making it this far. For all the storms I’ve actually gone through, not just the internal ones, but the real ones. Sandstorms. Hurricanes. Unfit parents. Sexual, verbal, and physical abuse survivor. War. (I’d even throw childbirth in there and a rib tattoo, broken bones, sickness). STORMS. 🤓
I’ve got enough medals and awards from the military that I could fill an entire wall but nothing makes me happier than to see my blog hit FIFTY THOUSAND VIEWS. 50,000 visits to my little home on the web!!! 😍
I read through the WordPress FAQ some time ago to see if my own IP/visits are counted / included and THEY ARE NOT (though the do keep track of authors separately because you can have multiple authors on a single blog (which is why you can see yourself in the stats but if you go read the FAQ you will see that it clearly does not count towards your view/visit counts to your own blog!!
My blog has also been getting more follows too, the current tally is 834 blog followers and if I ever hit 1K I will squeal! I am a terrible blogger in that my depression and anxiety keeps me isolated, so I’m not social, but I put everything I have into the words I bring you. I’m genuine, I’m just emotionally unavailable. Maybe my soul is leaking from my pen and now you all have bits of me. I’m giving you all I have.
Your feedback and comments and support is a treasure surely and though I oft little share it in return, I am grateful for you. I’ll even protect you and take a bullet for you but hold your hand, no. Sometimes people ask me what my sexuality is or my nationality and I say vampirism. I walk the streets of hell alone, it is my duty. I cannot be sidetracked by lust and sins, be gone demons. I’ve had enough. Mine is tempered and sleeping this decade off because- Apophis 2029. I’m only interested in spiritual healing, positive energy, and mental growth. I’m dying. The end is painful but the environment must be peaceful, dig? I don’t want you in my foxhole. But near. Tell me of beauty and poetry. I’m entitled to die how I want. If they made assisted suicide legal, I’d be on that bandwagon in a heartbeat.
Depression is and can be TERMINAL. The methods for treating depression are barbaric. From foxholes to thorazine hazed padded rooms. Fuck you. My diary 2020. Bringing it to you live right now. This year so far, on top of this pandemic, I was nearly hospitalized without my permission, taken in the back of a cop car, to a hospital so my mental health could be evaluated before they decided if they were going to withhold me, for a minimum of one week (7 days), without my permission, without any way to escape, without my service dog, my phone, or even the clothes on my back. In fact, while I was waiting in a locked room, they removed all of my clothing and items and gave me a hospital gown. 4 hours later the doctor saw me and agreed I was fit enough to return home. Which was great because I had already pre-warned the cop that if I was separated from my dog I was about to turn into a criminal with a record… but also, recently as the shutdown was happening here in Florida, I got pulled over by three cops in 3 cop cars with their lights going for not doing a full stop at the sign. A tiny fraction of a rolling stop- 3 cops. And I nearly died of a heart-attack. And white privilege was definitely not rolling around in my head, more like fear, but it did help that I was a damsel in distress and (kind of cute but my dog is cuter), but I didn’t yell at the cops either, or give them any more reasons to come at me hostilly cuz they weren’t fucking around… anyhoo that was probably my 8th life out of 9 cat lives lived/used… my luck and time is running out. But also, lesson learned STAY HOME.
2020 has mostly been lows but the blog love has been a lifeboat, a lighthouse, and even a life jacket and I can breathe a little. There’s nothing worse than my freedom being threatened. But I’ve been responsible for it being threatened every time, my worst enemy is me.
Fuck defundung the police. How about giving back the rights to vote to voters who are back in society. Think about all the people in America who cannot vote because of the War on Drugs, marijuana is becoming legal in a lot of States, but there are still people behind bars for marijuana offenses. WRONG. FREE THE PEOPLE. FREE THE PLANT. STOP THE WAR ON DRUGS. WE NEED REFORM IN JAILS AND PRISONS. We need to give people back their right to vote!!! “But voting doesn’t make a difference” fuck you- IT DOES. Utilize your right to vote! Florida had on the ballot to give back prior criminals the right to vote and it passed and I was there voting on that issue, I voted yes, give them their rights back to vote, so luckily people who have gone to jail or prison over the War on Drugs at least in Florida now have the right to vote again, fucking use your voice, it works! And yes I know all about the NWO / New World Order Illuminati, I know they exist, but on a state-level voting helps.
Anyway, I’m not allowed to talk about politics or religion or even what kind of medications I’m allowed to put in my own body because I will literally lose followers and supporters… Someone out there right now is probably unfollowing me because I am pro mask and pro medicinal marijuana. Or pro-voter. I’ve lost followers for not being Christian enough. For vampire cosplay. For not being sexually available for their needs. For not giving them my precious energy or time. For showing my boobs. For not showing my boobs. I mean, all I have to do is wake the fuck up and I’ll lose a follower. Here, there, everywhere. It’s frustrating. It’s meant to hurt. It always does. And sometimes I even run off followers with a duststorm following behind. It’s regretful yes. I’ve even sent hatemail. UGGG. THE CROSS I CARRY. CURSED. Sometimes I know what caused the manic outbreaks. I’m just trying to get to a point in my life where I don’t react. Zen. I also get my Jeep paid off in October which will be my last car payment and that will bring me some financial freedom and I’ll be out of the financial apocalypse that I found myself in. Then I’m saving for a trip to the UK. VACA. TRAVEL. The thing I live for. MUSIC. BUSH. BANDS.
Thanks for reading my blog! For following! For liking and commenting! For re-blogging or sharing my work! For dealing with my anti-social behavior and mood swings. For forgiving me of my mistakes and still loving me when I make them because you see that I’ve put in effort to get better or change. For trying to listen and learn about depression. For allowing me to be completely transparent with you. For letting me decide things and then change my mind. For letting me experiment with who I am and what is art. For letting me share my sexuality without there being some form of sexual harassment that always follows. For letting me just be me and not having to give you anything in return (tid for tat). For liking me despite my flaws. For encouraging me to keep writing!! For reading my rhyme!!! There just aren’t many people who are into rhyming poetry or even that many rhyming poets left!! So I’m grateful for you! And I need so much space currently to write. I need the space to be a certain energy or vibe. I don’t have time or energy to piss away, I have so much left to say and so little mood or energy to do it!! Thanks for listening! THANKS FOR 50,000 VISITS TO MY BLOG. HOLY SHIT. I love you. 😍
Screenshot of my pinned tweet by the amazing actor, Val Kilmer who said he LOVED my handle (my Twitter name which is my pseudonym/pen name on the web and under which I write /publish poetry).
As a writer, it was cool to get a compliment about my pen from one of my favorite actors since I was 10 years old, and first saw him in the film Willow. Loved him in Batman, The Doors, and so many more movies!! I wish I could get my hands on some of Kilmer’s poetry. And I’m devastated I sold my first edition poetry book by Jim Morrison on Ebay but financial apocalypse… (it was either going to be an heirloom for my child or it was going to be loot in my tomb).
I’m sorry the audio is out of synch with the video. I tried recording 20 times, 2 different devices, restarting device & internet, still not in sync. Accepted life is messy and not perfect. Edited and posted anyway for effort and because 50K!!Amazed50K!!! Edgar Allan Poe sends his regards 😆I was up all night nearly patiently waiting for my blog to roll over to 50,000 views. This was 10 views away from 50K. And I missed 50,000, when it turned it was already at 50,003!! 🤓If you’re bothered by a little bra showing, it’s Florida m’kay, nearly 100 degrees here… no filter. Thanks for 50K!!! I luv u!!! My 50K smile 😆I don’t have just a few freckles, in reality, I have more freckles on my body than existing galaxies… For realz (just change ‘outing’ to ‘anything I said yes to’ instead)
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All these centuries it was you I craved Hiking mountains of longing while your name I praised All these fallen ruins are bits of you I’ve saved Every foot in darkness steps for you I braved
Pulling part the ocean that’s the depths I paved Fusion in my core for the light that’s phased Trust in only love cuz that’s my heart you grazed Want to spend eternity with our souls engraved
Probably the sweetest love poem I’ve ever written. I literally enchanted myself. A first. But it is now after 2 AM and maybe I’m just tired… But my blog is nearing 50K views (that’s 50,000 visits folks) and I want to pee myself!! 😍
But I wrote a poem instead. And I hesitated to write a second stanza, but once I got going I’m glad I did… I’m sick to fuck of love to be honest. Someone said I was too young to be a cougar, that I was a cub instead. Well, whatever. Now that I’m ready to date and mingle there’s a bloody zombie apocalypse going on. I ain’t trying to die from the plague. Apophis (that huge effing asteroid) is returning to kiss Earth in April 2029, which sounds like a more exciting world ending, and I hope to get laid by then too… 😏
🤗
If you enjoyed this post or enjoy this blog and would like to make a donation to support my creativity, you can donate to my PayPal here: https://www.paypal.me/deliaross
Or, if you dig my writing, you can support this blog and my ongoing creativity by subscribing to my Patreon here: https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
Why are you a moon behind a cloud? Exterminating the sun And everything I’ve done I don’t have the gumption to fight the blues These depths you send me to are pressurized Why do you flank my fears Have I not sacrificed enough tears? My blood thick of you And every molecule I’m stuck like glue Can you erase me from your shit list Sketch a smile or two? I do not fare well When feet are quicksand Head sinking too Your berries are poison but I ate a few Just to taste the bitterness you accrue Just to feel the things you do Why do you lead me to darkness? All these acres feels like abandonment The atmosphere tenuous Like the link of us How do you forget? Was it as quick as lightning Your exit? Still I trace your silhouette I find clues on my doorstep Was that your regret? Leaving me too soon? Is that my tears you collect? Is defeat what you accept? Please return this June Preferably by noon
If you dig my writing, you can support my advertisement free blog by subscribing to my Patreon here (please & thank you): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
If I placed within your palm the center of my heart Would you set it on a wooden pyre Wrapped in silk and laced with fire Soot and ashes for your quill of black art?
Would you rather have a table Burning candles like starlight Where you’d hold me like I’m life Would my love you’d gently cradle?
In the parlance of our language Like lovers at defeat When I’m begging at your feet Are these poems here to anguish?
In your heart do I expand Like galaxies slowly forming Or am I just another warning Like the dead who died because they’re damned?
There are mountains crumbling inside of me Boulders sun-warmed from your thick voice Moss-covered limbs reaching for your skies Cobbles and pebbles charged from your breath and lightening You belong in these darkened caves Mining for affection You are a Thunder God shaking my core I rattle from longing Round me up as bedrock for your feet Walk all over me Take these stones and build your kingdom I fall for you Like a gentle slope bowing Climb these craggy edges Claim your territory I hunger for you Like a century-long thirst Come feel my rivers rush The way I gush for your tongue
You must be an alchemist Changing storms into words Are your hands magic? Touching every part of me Do you practice divination? The way you see into my soul Your eyes must be crystal Casting spells of longing You have complete control I am just fire scrying Your flame dancing To your thunderous voice To your incantations Your ink must be supernatural Enchanting my entire existence For I do not remember life before your words The sun shines differently now I see only you Clawing at my door Wishing for something more I am her The one you wrote into existence Am I your favorite page? Or just a closed book collecting dust My cover torn and worn But aching for your magic Open me up once again Put flame into these bones Come back to my forests I am waiting for you Heal me with your lips Invoke me Give me life once more
Lost somewhere in his stratosphere (self portrait 5/26/2020)
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You break me. Only to put me back together and then break me again. And then together. Like the tide pulling. Every wave shaping me. Over and under, your tug and pull. I can’t escape your gravity. Tidal locked. Sometimes your waves are gentle and other times your undertow holds me down. Like the gravity of my mistakes. And your punishments are a tsunami. Drowning and then washed safely ashore. I ache for you in places I didn’t know existed.
When you return So too the tide And the color in my eye When you are by
The way I churn When you are near The stars appear My life’s not drear
Each wave a yearn An endless shore Where I want more You the seashore
I want to earn Your every surge You give me urge The deepest merge
My god when you rise, rise you do. The way you swell, swallow me.
I’m on a social media detoxIn case you hadn’t noticed
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. If you dig my stuffs, please check out my campaign & subscribe!! www.patreon.com/poeeternal
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal
I’m getting ready to go on some sort of two week social media detox. I’ll be working on content for my campaign and patrons still. But elsewhere I’m gonna attempt radio silence.
Has reason ever opened its wings for you On cool spring mornings Like seeing the world for the first time in color The way your blue drapes over the skies Have you ever seen your slight smile shining like a crescent moon The way it hangs over my heart like you do With hands strong as timber Planting your roots in my veins I found you so feebly Why did you disappear so deep into darkness What if my hand never touches your skin That’s how oceans form in deserts The way you planted life in me From a single drop of your pen Or the first time I heard you speak Water rolling in covering my sumits I need you You are the air I breathe Every thought, every molecule I crush through your secrets like photons do You should identify as a galaxy Can you see your reflection in my eyes There, the big bang I’m still forming from your words You could be 93 million miles from me and you’d still only take a light-second to reach me You can run but you can’t hide from existence You must find my vibrations through space-time Echoing and longing for your thunder Lightning is when you see me Your voice causes my soul to have earthquakes The way you make me shake You are the dark and the light I want all of you Like a raging fire ravishing a forest Cracking open seeds So life can begin I start and end with you You are my forever
Welp, I still love you. I was soul-sleeping til you found me.I haven’t slept since. Obsession or love, it’s all the same.
Bathroom selfie. Quarantine sucks. And ZERO GIGS THIS YEAR. ZERO. My dreams are always fucking nightmares anyway…
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. Can you help me reach my goal? www.patreon.com/poeeternal
If you dig my writing, and would like to see this blog continue, you can support my advertisement free blog by subscribing to my Patreon here (please & thank you): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal