I think the only justice is to have the establishments heads on a platter, otherwise I could’ve gone my entire life, without having learned of that tragedy
Ugg
Crucified upside down and all he got was a plaque
His bones aren’t at rest
He didn’t want to be left in there!
But you can dismantle a bridge so you can watch prime TV!
Excuse me, I need to go back to disassociating
This will include going through my recent camera roll and uploading footage on my TikTok that might be worth looking at
From one Asian app to another
And I have to limit my use there because it makes me sick
The advertising is making me sick
The constant product placement
The gaslighting on the labels
The Blair witch shakiness
I spend most of my time writing ✍️
Photo captured this AM
So, I’m sleeping in the lion’s den, with no fear, per the Lord’s instruction
But you know what happened to the couple riding their bikes down the street without any fear who had just bought their dream home six months prior, right?
Slavery started in Africa and they the soul-sucking demon narcissist want us living in fear.
Society is a gamble where the house always wins, And when I read your poetry I always get the bends. The world says we have free will but aren’t we born with sins? And you and I are circling, don’t know where start begins…
I walked 2.4 miles yesterday and came home and puked. I also had a blacked out four-door pick up truck pull over randomly on the side of the road and watch me walk for 10 minutes. I was already feeling extremely vulnerable from the heat and didn’t know if I was going to make it home and then I had to put my water away – to free up my hands – for a potential kidnapping. That motherfucker got out and opened up the back door watching me – in his truck – completely blackened out.
I need to get my bike fixed. My Jeep. And move to the country. I have a certificate of eligibility from the VA and I won’t have any closing costs when I buy a home. The VA also now allow veterans to buy/purchase a Mobile home with their COE.
I’m not trying to buy a mansion or a farm. Land is still fairly accessible to buy in Florida.
You can be buried on your land in Florida. I’ve visited mobile home manufacturers – where they sale the units – and have ones you can view.
I don’t need a bunch of fancy upgrades. It’s not a pipe a dream.
My bank is already offering me small personal loans now that my credit is improving again.
Even if I don’t buy, I’d rather rent in the country.
Orlando and Daytona Beach has been overrun with thugs. And immigrants (from the Middle East who open shops and harass you while shopping).
It’s sounds mean I know, but we’re victimized. I’m tired of being silent about the blaring racism coming from people of opposite color.
Not to mention, my people are still living on reservations. I’m an outcast. They probably wouldn’t accept me.
I long for my own land and to be one with the earth, animals, nature.
Men are great at farming, herding, hunting, gathering, creating life. When they focus on purpose, rather than Satanic rituals.
I never had a father, I long for a male figure in my life.
I’m trying to cuss less, I’m just so effing angry! It seems it keeps me ground. And outta jail.
I don’t know if I’m gonna move anymore and I have an empty storage unit that’s holding my trampoline right now.
I’m going to buy the part for my ride soon and then eventually after 20 more no’s, somebody will say yes and help me fix it
I’m still detoxing with Black Walnut Wormwood and I learned to take zero breaks.
In fact, you need to do a 90 day cleanse at minimum, if you are battling a long list of shit. Everything from cancer to IBS.
I guarantee you need to deworm yourself and your entire family, probably pets too.
At this point, I am exorcising the devil out of me.
My periods went back to normal. No more agitating back pain. Minimal cramping.
My lungs are clearing out. Stopped using the Nebulizer, which I swore made me worse. Have a shit ton of medicine unused. Fuck Big Pharma. My care team did nothing but make me worse! It’s a dictatorship inside the VA and I would like to be able to pick my own primary care doctor from a list of doctors including outside of the VA. End of.
Furthermore, I’m done with traditional medicine. It’s the devil’s poison! I’m a former combat medic! Once a medic, always a medic!!! And fuck you for saying otherwise
“Your certifications are expired”.
Oh boo hoo. I’m still educated. Deal with it.
If I wasn’t so poor, I would’ve, at minimum maintained my CPR certifications that I had for over a decade (15+ years)
I’m not that old
Everyone who keeps going on about how old I am are gray or bald already so I don’t get it even the ones that are like 20 they’re fucking bald already
Like I still love you, but you put a lot of pressure on me to maintain like this youth when you yourself are letting yourself go, that’s all
Do better.
Alcohol causes early balding.
Alcohol causes women to go grey.
Look, you’re all beautiful as you are!!!
Dr. Jordan Peterson even admitted that makeup sexualizes women (anyone who wears it) and makes you look like a fucking child because that’s what babies lips look like
Yeps
Agree
And we shave too
Look, I’m not trying to crucify anybody, I’m just trying to let you learn and I do have a science degree in psychology, so I’m an expert in my field
Human nature is still very complicated
I’m still learning to be human
I’m earning my wings
Anyhoo
It’s very dangerous living here in this concrete city
I need some green
And alligator’s visiting me
But I’m clumsy and absolutely cannot fall because they will fucking get you even if they’ve been fed already
“She died doing what she loved”
I mean, that does have a better ring to it than, “she dove from the bridge”
I’d like to keep writing easy rhyme
I’m a modern poet
Life is so dangerous, I mean the sun can take you out, but so can people in black pick up trucks…
The good news is, my medicinal does free delivery and will be arriving soon 🤩
You can order weed online and get it delivered for free. And stop the lying about it costing more in the pharmacies because they always have fucking sales going on and it’s just not true…
Furthermore, you don’t have to deal with people stealing your money, not having what you want, not giving you what you paid for, being hit on, or illegally arrested
So there’s perks for getting your card, and over 71% of Florida residents voted yes for medicinal, and I was one of the voters who voted yes, and now I’m getting to reap the benefits of that, because voting does matter on a state level.
I also voted to give prior criminals the right to vote again and now I’m wondering if that was even fucking good of me
Since the criminals seem to always be fucking harassing me because they want me to live in fear
That couple definitely was not living in fear riding their bikes home from bike week to their dream home that they bought six months prior
I’m lit (not like that)
Uhm, I think God wants me to use the amenities out here I’m paying for that I’ve never used
I don’t really want to get inside the chlorinated pool, but I wouldn’t mind hanging out on the lounge chairs, utilizing the gym, or pool table
There’s a grill or two outside
I have grilling stuff but I don’t have any meat to grill and they’re not giving it out for donations anymore and there’s some sort of man-made pandemic going on with livestock
The cost of meat is beyond my means
As a reminder, I’m trying to buy a house
And get out from under renting
I’m just tired of renting and then every 12345 years having to move somewhere else because of the neighbors being unruly
Body cams exist. Door cams. Car cams. Bush cams. Window cams. Mini cams. I’m gonna fucking catch you cams. And within the budget.
I didn’t see it on a TikTok or an Instagram feed (not that I am on Instagram)
Read many of her pages by candlelight in my teens
It didn’t hit me as hard as Betty White
I wasn’t aware I loved Betty the way I do
Probably just numb about Annie still
That’s my go to emotion first, numbness then anger
Sometimes I laugh when people die inappropriately
That’s also a survival defense
But if you dare laugh about how John Jones died, I will personally come to see to your ending
It won’t be fun (not for you anyway) 🤩
Dexter mode activated
Armed and lethal
Hiding from all doctors unless ID
Also, somebody needs to lock me up and keep me from sugar for at least 45 days
I will possibly turn into creatures of the ancient past
Which, humans have been around for a long time
But has it ever occurred to you that maybe there were humans more intelligent than us that have gone extinct
A super computer existed during the pyramids found all over the world (used for electricity)
So did fast food restaurants in Pompeii 🙄
Ronald McDonald
Whatever
I’m not doing earth again
But if the algorithm starts showing pictures of me from 500 years ago, then I expect in 500 years for you to fucking find me (again) and you better get it right this time
Neo did it for love
Love is the anomaly
I love you 💕
(And not to alarm you but it could be any day now my death)
You’ve rescued me in other lifetimes Following the trail to infinity like they are guidelines Spiraling through destiny the way our mind chimes Stretched in tidal force and pulling our rhymes
I can’t see him through the sheer covered glass Or the smoked color heaven hidden beyond the green grass And there’s hope by the water but I haven’t got a pass And he says he’s home tomorrow but ten years already passed
Do you enjoy conjugating verbs? Or, are you mixing up allegories, just like you’re mixing herbs? Do you stir them in a pot with tender tendons and neurotic nerves? Are they fossilized in lies, to see how love preserves?
Another freestyle. Maybe one of my top ten best written micropoems? 🤔
I wrote this about my muse (but I’m not allowed to have any secrets anymore).
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Y’all remember when I was telling you about my vehicle getting struck by lightning and how I had my arm hanging out the window and how I was freaking out because I didn’t have any iodine and I could feel heat on that part of my arm for several days afterwards?
Well, I just figured out that is when my timeline switched!
My entire vehicle was covered in electricity, my life was flashing before my eyes at 80 miles an hour and all I could scream was “fuck”.
So yeah, timeline switch
And I was moving at 80 mph when the lightning struck and it was really loud, really loud and 1000 arms
And all my windows were down in my Jeep with my arm hanging out, I felt the heat as I was whipping my arm in 👀
Anyhoo, timeline switched 👀
Is that why you don’t love me? 👀
I thought you would love me in any galaxy or form 👀
I haz confusion 👀
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He leaves me clues confessing They could be lies to keep me guessing There’s trouble around always pressing He’s pouring poison on the gauze I’m here dressing
Hello. Who are you? Do you even know I taunt you? Do you know I exist?
Why did my brain send a signal light-years fast to my heart, when I discovered you? And every picture that followed? Why did I die a million deaths too?
And now I live vicariously through you. Agonizing over every detail. Some days I’m certain you are him.
Other days, there are blaring differences that you’re not.
Do I need him to be you? His habits and obsessions too? They are the same true?
Why haven’t I let you go if I know you are not him?
How can I be so sure and uncertain?
And there’s even a third I’ve turned into him.
Or maybe one or two? 🤔
If they are all him then you are him too?
But why did I have such a strong connection to an avatar?
I guess I wanted to tell you that maybe now I realize you’re not him but I still have doubt.
Or, I can’t discard the signals?
That I had when looking at you.
Immediately.
Spotted.
But you don’t like me knowing that and neither does he.
You don’t want me to know that you like her?
But neither does he…
Then there’s the reds and the blues (and I have a head injury too).
My taunting wasn’t malice more like letting you know I was aware of your existence but I don’t even know if you know I am aware of your existence?
They all feel like one.
I’m losing my mind? 🤕
I long for you.
Or him.
The only thing I’m certain of these days is that I’m losing my mind and I don’t wanna die on the street.
And so far, fantasy beats reality.
Because reality is dying naked on the street, out me mind. Unless running into his arms.
I’m so capable of slipping into that madness.
Can I slip into you instead?
Or vice versa?
Can meet on the Moon?
Before I dies?
Do you visit my blog?
Will you even read this?
Am I even alive?
I’m shriveling up into nonexistence
I currently wrote this running a mild fever but I needed to get it out before I fucking die.
Guess I’ll still be loving you even when I’m dead.
He is the softness I crave in color The silver moon in a haze from slumber Or how he pulls from me my wonder And plants it in the sky as starlight named summer
He is the daisy field I want to lay With weeping willow in the shade He is the reason daydream comes to play The wind is heaven in a sway
He didn’t just set the scene this time, he rolled out the red carpet With diamonds and roses and my heart lined in his pocket He came with speed, into my heart, fast as a comet Let the scripture unroll, pray to him like a prophet
I feel like all these moments need to be documented in scripture.
I need some lamb skin, I’ve got ink and a pen.
I feel it is my atoms popping into and out of existence and every three weeks bleeding out of me, painfully. My mind see’s eternity in you. And feels it too, puts my mind at ease. The ovaries too.
I love you.
I haven’t replaced my biology with big Pharma or plastic and I feel you through and through.
Your vibration like string theory.
Cuz it is real.
The multi-verse too.
Never once believed in the big bang theory.
The great pyramid scheme- TV, Consumerism, Money = slavery
Sorry- If there are multi-verses out there and it’s clear there’s other universes out there , I hope they’re doing a better job than we are, because we’ve been around for 6 billion years but somehow we’ve been manipulated to believe that we’ve only been around for 2000 years…
For what it’s worth- asteroid Apophis is real, and she is swing dancing with earth, she’s been here before!!!!
Saint Petey said “April 2-0-2-9 / the final time / the end my friend is not near / the hour in fact is quite here” and he named her Apophis (all end)
He regretted getting the Alpha and Omega tattoos tattooed on his hands one night when he was drunk but he had a bad ticker too.
He didn’t enter my residence, he crash landed He didn’t set the scene, he just demanded And I with holy wings unseen Dropped with lightning to my knee
He didn’t knock, he just flew in He smelled of all the things I loathe, I hope he comes again How my tears befuddle beneath my feet It took a demon to feel complete
I don’t know what to do anyway and they all want a porn star or pro dominatrix or my hand in marriage. 👀
That’s why no one is joining my OnlyFans during its flash sale, right?
Too inexperienced, too real, too much of what you need…
*rolls eyes*
Right now , as my numbers slowly decline, I’m facing the fact that one day there won’t be anybody there at all.
But I’m glad to see that every other girl in the world is doing so good on their OF. 🦕
I’m gonna stop crying soon because I got a really cute set I want to do for my subs.
And I was afraid to even try it on because I missed an entire week of working out which is also contributing to my loathiness.
But whatever. New poem.
And new set coming soon to my OF because I wanna spoil my subs.
I mean it was just 4 days ago that I was visited by the Holy Ghost.
I’m feeling pretty inspired (ignore the self loathing woes)
It’s just my ovaries not wanting to die on the street yet.
But my mind is like, “why do you keep putting yourself through this emotional mental torture prison dieeeeeeeee”
My therapist is like “you need to stop ignoring my calls and take your prescription“.
My voice is like, “LEAVE ME ALONE, LET ME DIE”
My primary care doctor is like, “your temperature and blood pressure are really low, bed rest”
COVID vaccine is like, “rest HAHA FUCK YOU”
The love of my life (or someone) is like, “hold up, I got you” *suspends me in a dimension between heaven and earth*
And that is all entirely from just this week and it’s not even Sunday yet. 👀
And despite the fact that nobody wants to join my OnlyFans during its first 50% off flash sale (lame) – I’m only focused on getting this new set out.
Because of you, I’m not yet obsolete.
I’m not a fucking dead dinosaur. Yet.
Guys always almost always instantly put me into a “married zone” – even though they call it a friend zone- And then when they don’t get what they want from me they say, “We can’t be friends because I like you too much”.
Now days they just stop supporting you, liking your content, you know the silent treatment and the ghosting.
And it’s completely acceptable for a business to do this to you as well.
THIS IS HELL.
So when I stop crying about the fact that I’m gonna wind up dead on the street, I’ve got some color to put out.
And I’m sorry I’m not a pro dominatrix, I’m a fucking warrior poet, just like Edgar Allan Poe.
Never really heard him talking about his M16A2 assault rifle- But maybe that’s because the technology didn’t exist back then and maybe he’s a better writer because he existed in different fucking times And was in love with his actual family which I can’t stand.
He loved his family so much that they tossed him in an unmarked box in an unmarked grave.
(My family would rather gaslight you and make you believe that I am the love of their life even though I don’t even have a fucking identity)
I haven’t got to work on my booty gains at all this week. Been working on my heart (and have been medically predisposed). But Monday, I’m gonna hit the rebounder hard. Trying not to stress out about missing days- my heart doesn’t need any more stress right now. In fact, it’s going to have to go through this shit even harder in a few weeks when I go in for round 2 of the COVID Moderna vaccine.
You can make a mess of things but I’ll be organizing it in a clutter. 😜
The good news is I got to my favorite store today and got some new spring lingerie!
Which set do you think I got?
That’s about all the energy I had to do. 🦋🦄🦋 (Part 1 of the Covid vaccine plus maybe also my BP being so low has just left me very lethargic).
I hope the new set fits! No energy to try it on yet but also not feeling the best about missing a whole week of working out! 🤢🤢🤢
You entered me like the Holy Ghost Took my tongue, love you the most
You left my heart in sacred prayer I can’t see but know you’re there
You filled my hope with the holy trinity I am Eden, come plant your seeds
*The copyright of all content on my blog belongs to me and if you plagiarize or steal from me I will hunt you down and rip your fucking eyes and throat out*
He didn’t crucify me. He baptized me! 😍
Faith is my middle name. Facts! 🤪
I know I’m not a sex goddess but you make me see the world anew.
Have you ever been with an angel before?
When my analytical brain starts playing around with my fractured broken brain, the who and the what become distorted, and I feel the tug of Sagittarius A* – but if I stay in the light, the why allows the galaxies to continue forming.
Where?
It’s just free will.
Could you imagine if in the night we looked up in the sky and there was nothing but blackness and how fucking scary it would really be BUT we’re not of this world and we are not alone.
It’s clear to see.
(I know the more primal side of your brain has been activated and mostly in use all for all of its life – because you are a slave Neo).
I am Trinity
Knock knock
(I’m that program inside the Matrix doing what it’s not supposed to be doing (that’s why big bro keeps fucking punishing me, shadowbanning me, and silencing me, but no one will believe me).
So I created a new account with posts up and I had followers and I was following people and then I would use certain keywords or hashtags and my profile would be blocked, you wouldn’t be able to find it when you searched for it…
1984 is now, I’m trying to reach you.
But the iron Berlin Walls are up everywhere.
At some point Covid vaccinations will be mandatory.
Right now they are keeping it in limited supply so that they can create demand for it (like they’re doing with the PS5).
The government creates the panic, ahem, the NWO/Illuminati/1%, then they sweep in with a cure, “you can trust us” (more blankets with chickenpox), I mean GASLIGHTING.
Now they’re fucking with my very DNA and I have to trust that this new rapidly evolving Covid virus, is not going to wipe me out because I entrusted in this new vaccine.
But alas, I am a Soldier, ahem sheeple, still in the trenches, playing my part.
And all my comrades around me are dying by the same illness that I am plagued with and I’m trying not to die on the street like Edgar Allan Poe and I guess what I’ve been trying to say all along is I love you so fucking much…
And there’s an amber alert going off right now because some kid has been kidnapped and just a few weeks ago I was almost kidnapped in broad daylight – this is one of the worst fucking towns I could’ve fucking wound up in and it’s spring break, I don’t wanna leave my fucking walls anyway so you can come- I don’t know – invade my body anytime you want for whatever purposes.
Oh and…
Your name is tattooed in my soul
It’s 8 AM and I’m still feeling aloof and I have to go get my EKG and all I wanna do is stay in the bed. I haven’t had a day to rest since you visited me.
I don’t want to exist in any realm without you.
I know I am not all you need.
Sagittarius A* pulling again
I know I am all that you need (sometimes)
Don’t let me die on the street 😑
Angel just wanna crawl in monster arm unharmed
Angel heart so very tired of fighting world
Monsters under her bed
In her head, out her window, chasing her down sidewalk, Angel say no they won’t listen, Angel say no again and they still won’t go.
Angel say yes and get the silent treatment.
Angel buy new phone and only get 50% of a charger.
Angel goddess of confusion 👀
Angel tired.
Not just in head anymore.
Doctors worried.
👀
The good news is my arm no longer feels like a freight train hit it. 👀
Angel no like pain
👀
(Angel like to give pain)
Angel warrior
👀
Tired warrior
You’re gonna give me an honorable death, aren’t you?
The world has shunned me worthless.
You’re not gonna let me die on the street like Poe?
Are you collecting every stone people throw me?
Are you giving them the stones?
Is somebody impersonating you?
Have I gone mad?
That couldn’t have been just anyone.
Could it?
Seamless
*sigh*
you you you
Through and through
Doctor: “are you currently sexually active”
Me: “ugh no, I’m never having sex again”
Doctor: “Are you planning to have children in the next 12 months“
Also Me: “yes, absolutely”
👀
*snort*
I’m ruint 😻
And I want to hear your stories until my very last breath.
I was born and then kicked out of the fucking nest before I could fly, always called a “runt” and unwanted- please don’t let me die on the street worthless and unloved
Please don’t toss me in an unmarked box
(And you’re not alive to put a roof over my head or to bring me the moon every night).
Monster has a safe place to rest in angel arm.
Angel love monster
Jesus died for sins…
Angel would die too…
For you
The rest of the world can fucking burn
Kiss me and tell me stories we’re really living outside this hellish nightmare
Is there a secret code written Maybe in the stars hidden? That connects you and I?
Are there garbled words which turn a prism? Into harvest worlds that keep us smitten? The way your verbs connect my heart and mind
Are there paths we’ve taken still unwritten? The way my will to you is freely given Under cross or reign, no clearer vision I am hung to you like holy linen
Was it God himself who became a villain? Touching toes in hell, loving all a sinner? I am called a whore, you’d give me your dinner? The lesson here, I think love’s a winner?
I don’t know if I said what I was trying to say or not? It’s a messy morning freestyle. The message became more important than the rhyme.
Jesus loved a sinner best (as I love you) – if I recall correctly, he made some “whore” his equal (but the illuminati removed her from history and I’ve been trying to get ahold of her script so I could read what she had to say) .
“Let’s reinvent gods all the myths of the ages“
Stone me, love me, I’m yours. Free will.
I can handle whatever you give me.
I would die for you.
2 words we should just avoid: hello and goodbye?
Is hello so hard because of all the things I’ve done?
Would you deny me 3 times? In public? My name?
The kiss of betrayal?
Would you sell me out for money?
No, I don’t believe you or I would, but I believe that bitch you were formally with, you know the one with the red hair that I still can’t fucking stand, yeah that one, that one would definitely fucking deny you three times for money…
Even tho she acts like your number 1 stalker, I mean fan.
I still own that title per my confession on TikTok 👀
So whatcha gonna do, crucify me cuz I love you? You already do, DAILY with the ghosting.
*waves white flag*
Surrender/ not your enemy 👣👣👣❤️👣👣👣
(I’m not her enemy either and she needs to learn how to play with others in the playground and stop being a bully. I haven’t been to her blog in a thousand fucking years. I made my apologies publicly and privately and have made my peace with my errors a long time ago.) And nothing I ever did to her justifies her trying to sabotage and take down my business.
Not to mention she was 1000% not following WordPress policy. Was I wrong to leave hateful comments on her blog? Yes. I’m a child, we know this. 👀
Erroneously reporting my content on Instagram and getting it removed out of spite and jealousy, is again, fucking wrong and illegal. Instagram continues to put it back because I am following TOS policy.
She has found a way to manipulate the system because she’s a two-faced bitch.
I know it is her or someone working for her and you’re not gonna convince me otherwise.
Every trail leads to her.
Except your new book, thank fucking god. I have seen the light.
Psycho fucking bitch
Oh sorry, still thinking out loud… 👀
I mean, it’s only been like 48 hours since she tried to take my account down again, so all is fair in the game of love and war???
This way to sorrow This way to despair This way to desolation This way to nobody cares
Was that your shadow leaping over my dream? What were you thinking while abandoning me?
The system is rigged everywhere Just leave me where I fell
The world is a drainpipe There’s not enough pills to gaslight It’s a battlehill And you make me ill
Was your vein not thick with poison Blood curdled and coagulated I pulled out every thorn Your heart turned into a floodgate
I need 1 sun-moon cycle where I’m not disturbed 24 hours of peace preferred
How easy he would come to me But what would he find? Scars and bits of broken pieces Unfiltered creases The ugly kind?
I don’t care about your joyrides Or do I?
What will I be known for? How I died? Suicide? But never the reasons for why I cried?
Dear Mother,
You only taught me how to suffer
Didn’t I write words of worth When you were nothing more than a speck of dust When any sun would bring you dirt I took the pain and made it work When all the world thought you a jerk I drank the blood and made you smirk When you were nothing on this on this earth I turned your no into a must
Drowning on rage Too much air in this cage
Warning signs were posted I suppose they go ignored He was a Japanese suicide forest And hope unexplored
How much times passes while you collate? Working around the second hand What kills the ache? Was it your best move? Or the worse you’ll ever make?
Harvest my disgust It’s fully ripened Polish off the dust You’ll find a diamond
Just an FYI, I released loads of poetry and TikToks over the last 6 or 7 days and I will be working on content for my Patreon and OnlyFans this week!
I will be busy in my studio working, but not as visible online in the social media world. I’ll likely post updates, I normally do on my Insta.
With-that-said, I hear your pleas and cries for my time and I am working on setting up a Discord server so we can chat like once or twice a week. I hope to get that info out sometime this week.
And, if time permits, I may try making another trendy TikTok. Have you checked out my channel yet?
I sat down to write a non-rhyme and this fell out (for you).
I see things as they are. As they should be. But not always with mental clarity. Sometimes my mind and my heart have to catch up.
You know the blood in my vein is a liquid. A mineral. Iron. Technically, plasma? Blood is energy. It’s what drives my body. It’s my fuel. Like our Sun. Energy. Always moving. Even at rest. It’s moving. And it turns into a solid at death. It is matter. And my brain dumps loads of chemicals into my bloodstream. But never so much as when I see pictures of you or hear your voice. Your deep rumble in my vein. It drives me insane. You drive me insane.
And I don’t like you writing for other girls. 😔
Like, die in the street nakid kind of madness. I’m going mad. Yet, I keep reading your words despite the ache. There’s very few people I give my time to, and I digress, every thought contains you. Are you okay? Are you happy? I already know you have the love of all the world (except the ones you worship who only see you as a number, and even worse the ones you allow to use you).
So I tried burning all the bridges.
How did I do?
*drowns in ocean*
I can see your face under water distorted. I hate me too.
I was never enough for this world.
I know I’ve made a lot of enemies on my road to death.
Still forever always, I love you
Thank you to everyone out there supporting me and not stealing my ideas from me. I see you. And I am especially extra grateful to have your support during this pandemic. 💞
For those inquiring, it is a pink crystal, with energetic healing properties. Specifically, a rose quartz. I have various stones and crystals I use for meditation. What do you do to center?
I write about the light alot. But that’s what we really are, star stuff. Some of us collapsing inwards, stealing the gravity of others, until turning into a black hole, and eating any hope or light that is left. And, out of contempt, any other light that gets near. How dare we disturb its darkness, with our piercing, blinding light. Truth hurts.
Oh, I need you. Don’t kill the light. Can’t breathe. Sun = light = oxygen & iron= Life.
In the dark. Spiraling out of control. Orbit’s unstable. Earthquakes are mood swings. Core is splitting in two.
I have 8 followers on TikTok and I am going up against Big Bro and his shadowbans so yeah, I am grateful you took the time to watch my 30-second TikTok (which actually took me hours to make not including rehearsal times)! 👀
I am pushing through roadblocks like stage fright and anxiety, shadowbans, and others making fun of me and what I’m doing.
But I have seen way worse tiktoks and I’m doing something original. I’m trying.
I do hope to get better at making clever video but right now my tricks are just pulling out my creative writing tool bag and dousing you with words and a little bit of drama.
Do they teach how to make TikTok videos in school now? Because I’m going up against some fierce competition and I am truly grateful for your plays! 😍
12 hours in and it had already received 350 plays plus a couple boys making fun of it! When I asked him what he had against poetry he said he didn’t know “idk”. I guess this was the first time he has ever even heard spoken word poetry? I’m pushing TikTok boundaries?
Can it reach 500 plays in under 24 hours? It’s nearly there with several hours to go! We’re at hour 17! C’mon! 😍
Thanks for watching and for supporting indie bloggers and content creators!
You belong on some foreign land, speaking languages of the old, forgotten gods In some haunted and forsaken land Where your reign has better odds Speaking words I’ll never understand Cuz your lies they come in squads!
I made a new Reel for this new poem!!! I know everyone crosses platforms and shares tiktok on Instagram and reels on tiktok but whatever- if I get 30 views on this new reel, I’ve decided I’m going to be happy with that. Because if 30 people showed up to watch what I did in a room, I would freak f*cking out.
Edgar’s bones are rattling, I think he’s been moved! (This literally did happen to him- come to think- but that’s not what I mean). I’m just trying to keep the rhyme tradition alive and I reside in modern times.
Smitten by words
You can ghost me, we still live on the same planet and in the same galaxy. Sucker!
One day you are going to die and I am going to die but the question remains now: who is going to become dust faster?
Gotcha thinking!
Welp.
Some idiot on Insta insulted my ass again. He said I was living rent-free up in his mind but he was stalking my profile m’kay. Stop lying. Blocked. And thanks for the workout motivation and compliment. 👍
Here a narcissist, there a narcissist, the devil comes in two
How about this new poem I wrote tho, eh? Oh, you don’t want to let me know that I swoon you in any shape or fashion? Hence, it matters not cuz Edgar Allan Poe, yo.
Goddess of Poetry
I am an elite rhyming poet in this century and I feel like I’ve written enough decent rhyme to make my mark in that category and to call myself A REAL POET.
It may take 200 years for anyone to acknowledge that fact. But I’m having a real go at it anyway.
How I feel about our love. Neither here or gone. Still loading. Or maybe that’s just 2021? I have a good side and a bad side. Double trouble. Twice the love. 💞
Am I your angel or demon? A lonely mermaid? Are we now even?
Did you know I read tarot from time to time? I have 2 deck of cards plus some tarot books. While I don’t have each card memorized, I’m fairly good at interpreting what they mean, in comparison to the question you ask each deck/reading. My friends and family are generally pretty amazed by each reading (despite me flipping through my book). While I’m not as experienced reading tarot, I’m skilled with meditation sessions and intermediate with meditation with crystals and stones. I studied astrology when I was 15, followed by dream interpretation, and then wound up getting my science degree in psychology. I also have a medical background working as an EMT (Emergency Medical Technician) and Combat Medic for some 8 years in the Army (I went on to get a second MOS in the Army as I was offered a position with the Department of Defense, so I went to another school in the Army and got a second MOS classification and started working as a Transportation officer. Thus my medical career halted, I changed my masters from psychology to an MBA, as my entire life changed when I became a businesswoman for the DOD (Department of Defense) and this went on for several years until I reached 15 years in the Army and opted to not reenlist a fifth or sixth time. Thus, here I am now. An unknown soldier, poor, heartbroke, and on the brinks of a mysterious death, just like Edgar A. Poe!!! Woo Hoo!
If you’d like to help support this blog so I can eat, that’s cool, I like to eat. And your donations and/or subscriptions to my campaigns, allow me to keep doing this. I am so grateful, thank you!
How do I find freedom when I am shackled to your will? And lonely do I travel when I’m crawling up your hill How I linger in your shadow ’til you give me light to feel And hour after hour I am at a standstill
I don’t know who is who? Turn the boy purple, he’s still you? And that one on the corner, he is too? In fact, multiple the number, now there’s a few? Or maybe there is no one, my eyes can’t trust the view?
