I write words for you grander than statues And still you would tear me into I collect rubble I stitch together fragments of time Your broken dreams are alive I give them life! And still you flew
I hold onto your dying breath like a pearl I show it heaven too But you are a fool
I told God you are forgetful You know not what you do But you knew Breaking my wings into Here they are for you
Wrapped and bleeding Like echoes singing Needless needing
They aren’t cherished in the places I go Still I can’t let go When I need you so
I buried my heart where you broke it Now it can’t be found I keep walking around Searching underground
I have a moral code, it’s angelic You wouldn’t get it
You keep chasing the wrong lines I’m writing overtime You keep committing crimes I’m begetting rhymes
They are gifts for a halfwit
I know it’s easier for you to slumber in hell Than chase steps to get well Heaven’s quite a long trail I went missing there
I hope one day to find my heart again My eyes grow tired from what it’s seen My feet are walking from this dream A nightmare encasing
I’m not well, can’t you tell? But like a comet I fell For you
Even angels fall Even angels crawl I am not that tall Underneath it all
I look for him in places he won’t be I’m not perfect like she I’m not anything Alive for humility So tired of suffering In cloaks of invisibility Why does he torture me He loves her infinitely I am nobody No one worth to see I am dying
There are galaxies growing full on regret with spiral arms chasing all it can get.
I should have been more careful with words The way they hollow out the bone And some forgive, some repent, most return the stone
His words are a ruse, perhaps a bruise, a broken home, where I still choose
He is my muse, a sun or fuse, a high with blues, regret in two’s
He’s got bullets for hands Fingers like loaded magazines With a mouth full of conniption His life is nothing but fiction And he’s all but evil in his genes
I’m so tired of carrying this cross; the weight of everything I’ve done. These last steps have only shown loss; and coming last, the loneliness I won.
Will you remember me when I’m only dust? When failed dreams are all but rust? Will you remember what we discussed? Will you keep safe my love of us?
Take your broken piece Take my broken bits Align them together Broken pieces that fits
The good die The wicked live The faithful cry The sinful don’t forgive
There’s only room in the world for the wicked Trust might be earned but you won’t keep it
Shuddering since the day my eyes befell you
What are you if not the every breath I take
The sight of his lip makes me weak The sound of his voice makes me tremble The way the blue in his eye makes me hunger Trip and fall under
He came stumbling in half-drunk on whiskey and regret Any feelings he hadn’t killed them yet
His voice in a low rumble Makes my atoms jumble Feel them roll and stumble How I crumble Now I’m humble
I could listen to his voice for hours Swallowing all eternity He plants words in me like flowers Growing taller is the love we need
You step out of my dream and into existence and take me for a moonlit walk With night flowers blooming and hours still looming the Moon carefully gawks My hands you are holding with energy flowing your lips where my kisses dock And our shadows growing where love comes out flowing our hearts beating like clocks
I’ve got 5 grams of darkness left for sale And an army of fears in a pale There’s a case of worry over there And for an upgrade you can go to hell
I can feel my face literally breaking From the pain in my chest where my heart is still aching Roads become regrets we are constantly taking
I wonder what color my hair is underneath all this shame
Come back my love Where my wild winds are blowing
It’s the end of the world today A sad parade And marching out slowly the hope that will fade
Sometimes he hurts me just to watch the sea level rise
I have night terrors and unholy cries My worth so little not worth goodbyes The days might be changing but not these grey skies
But for moments lost with you I forgot about the war
Or what I’m searching for
I open every door
Love me now Before you can’t anymore
I’m his bird Carefully observed Pecking away at his every word My hope reserved And hell deserved But love is here And well preserved
Your words have sharp edges The tips are poison They pierce my skin like butter How easy they hit my heart You the Trojan Horse And your army of lies I dance for them like a buffoon Their laughter drowns my cries But still my head is to the moon I stare at wonder I remember hope It once was a playground I ran around with naivety They mock what they can’t control I am still free Going places with the stars They can’t touch me Words are arrows yes But feet are healing Truth my blanket Saturn knows and her rings Cracks upon my frozen face She knows That’s why her northern poles glow She’s crying, longing and cold But even wrongs need embraces And that’s why light-seconds existed Galaxies out there granting wishes I know more than you know
I love the wonderful feedback about my poetry, that’s why I’m now on Patreon which is an excellent platform for writers and artist. If you dig my stuffs, please check out my campaign & subscribe!! www.patreon.com/poeeternal
He’s only there to watch me suffer Feeds on sorrow like it’s supper Winter might as well be summer ‘Cuz nothing stops me going under
Please take me back to the beginning Where just for once my life had meaning My head was quiet and heart was leading And doubt was sound asleep and dreaming
Scrub my heart ’til it’s clean Love is now a fragile dream Cracked and broken at the seam Replay the start, end the scene
For those who care, and for those who are asking, I’m okay. Practicing social distancing by keeping six feet and wearing a mask and gloves when I must + staying home. My community is not allowed any visitors for 30 days and my town is still in shutdown/isolation/quarantine mode. I hope you are okay too. Sending love. And a bit of sunshine from the Sunshine State. xoxo
I have an entire galaxy of freckles on me. I come flawed with natural hazel eyes. No one’s ever given a shit about my eye color though. Or me in general. I’m too petite and all the guys want thick girls or Barbie’s. Or modified with plastic and I prefer to feel things. So I am 100% all natural and rare. No longer dye my hair either. No fake nails, eyelashes, tans, breast, or hair. Just me. And I’m okay with me. I think it takes a lot of courage to be real these days. Peace out, yo.
The emptiness settles over me like fog rolling over hills and mountain tops And space, there’s not enough to keep him from my thoughts He’s got the world in his hands while my soul it sits and rots Round and wound he tunes us up like we are clocks And reason not as simple as connecting dots So doubt fills my head now thick as clots
Hi my loves. My introvertness has met maximum overload and I feel I am about to go cause some trouble in town. Maybe a toilet paper riot is what I need after all? This social distancing is starting to do my head in. How are you holding up? Tells me!!
MANDATORY SOCIAL DISTANCING. UGGGGG OVER IT! 2 AM BOREDOMSI mean, it’s a good idea if you don’t want to catch the Corona I iz boreddddddd (2 AM insomniac who sleeps in her eye makeup and wakes up looking like a $2 whore)Make it stopsIf you’re going crazzzzy out of your mind during this mandatory social distancing, just remember, it’s a normal response.
I have glimpses of a life I’ve never known There’s stitches in my heart where he has sewn There’s wishes leaking out of every bone There’s pieces of me in him I call home
There’s fences keeping eyes where they belong There’s chances never learning right or wrong And dances never settling in song Circumstances keeping everyone withdrawn
For the record, all my poems are new. I bleed poetry.
Mysubconscious or other worldy being is creating memories of a life with him that never existed because it can’t bear to live any part without him, and the regret is carving deeper rivers than I care to run. Love is love. But why is he scared of it? He’s just too selfish to part with his ways and he’s got a sex addiction he needs to get a grasp on. I mean God damn if Trent Reznor can be kinky and loyal why can’t there be other dudes!?! He’s the only guy I’ve ever asked to marry me by the way (Reznor that is) and it’s in the Nine Inch Nails archives somewhere and Trent Reznor did not say no and he answered my music questions too. That’s actually a nice real memory as opposed to the fake memories my brain is having to create because it loves a dude that won’t have anything to do with me…
I asked Trent Reznor to marry me, LOL I love me so much… that was back when he had an actual fanclub and he was active in the NIN message boards. You had to be in the club to get there. And when he did way with fanclubs, he made us permanent members (kinda of). I haven’t logged in, in a minute, I need to get over there. And to another gig. I’ve had stage every time, but have never officially met Trent. He’s on like kid number 5 now!?! She is popping out them babies god bless her, lucky bitch…Anyhoo, I’m totally gaga for the dude this poem is about, he knows who he is. Hi. I love you still. You know I’m your favorite love. Masks won’t hide fate. Or you from me. Sorry, not sorry. “I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo, what the hell am I doing here…”
What do you think an angels tear is worth? I’ve cried a million for him…
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Tell me, how many do you love? Is it one, is it two, or maybe 12 from above? Tell me, who do you spend your time thinking of? Is it Sue, is it Penny, do I ever occur? Tell me, am I ever her? Is there anything about me that might make you stir?
He digs any gal with panties around their ankles. Which isn’t me. No, I’m not worth noticing at all because I’M NOT NAKED or age 13. He also needs a constant supply of “yes” people. He doesn’t live in reality. He’s delusional. And his entire life is literally centered around his cock. Every move. How will his cock get off? That’s it, that’s all he’s good for. Cumming. And not one baby… He’s basically the scum of the universe and I’m moving into the “I hate him” phase. Hey, this is HIS BED, NOT MINE. He can run and hide under another blog but he needs a spaceship to the nearest black hole. GET IN THE SEA NOW, TAKE ALL YOUR BROWN NOSES WITH YOU.
If you dig my writing, you can support my blog by subscribing to my Patreon here (please & thank you): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
If you dig my writing, you can help keep this blog running and advert free by subscribing to my Patreon here (thank you beloved Patrons): https://www.patreon.com/poeeternal
All alone on another Eve
Does it matter if I’m well or sickly?
Loneliness is eating through my soul like a disease
I wash it down with eggnog and whiskey
I’ll be lucky if I make it to fifty I feel so exposed yet empty On and on my tears will stream I feel it all yet feel nothing
My purpose is few and far between
Climbed through his window, it’s getting darker it seems
Fighting for more than jewellery for the queens
Lost somewhere between nightmare and a dream
Is this purgatory?
For the living?
Monsters keep following me
I feed them honey
It came, it saw, it went
All my energy is spent
And I’m drowning in debt
With the economic collapse, I slipped
I’m such a catch you bet
Haven’t met my enemy yet
His name is death
I’m sorry you feel I am not worthy Of anything A lesson of, “I too agree” But please keep laughing….
Let me take a knee…
You are the king
Of the filthy
Let me kiss your ring
I’M BOWING
YOU ARE WINNING
Don’t visit me at the cemetery
Where I’m going…
I mean, you already killed me
His words hit like an EMP
A shock wave rushing over me
Unwrapping tears under the tree
Fears this Christmas eve
Rain and invisibility
The very essence of me
The light cast a web of shadows and doubt Losing time trying to figure it out Forging through worry with rarely a shout Aging like oak and bitter like stout Hardened inside with lines showing drought Incomplete circles with no love about Roots growing weaker with every new route Clinging to hate though loving devout Feeling so lonely while lost in a crowd Busting down rules where I’m not allowed Wishing for once I hadn’t figured it out The trouble with eyes they come with a mouth The problem with fate it comes with a vow I’d gift forgiveness but I don’t know how I’d run today but I am still bound You’d look away but you’re still around Looking in others what we already found Feeling uneasy but knowing not what to do now
If you climb the mountain of despair I will greet you there For my home is made of sorrow And it’s found everywhere No purpose for tomorrow Here there’s little air Watch him praying to the sparrow Well, I still don’t care
Top, bottom, or in between
It’s the still same routine
Kiss them now or never
Been numb since I was fifteen
Blinded or with sight
Still can’t feel anything
With cure or a poison
There is no vaccine
She hides her face
So the dark can’t see her pain
She needs embrace
But the tears come with the rain
She fell from grace
So they call her insane
Lost to a rigged race
Her heart was cheaply slain
By a monster who disappeared without a trace
And he’s not worth a name
Another year alone on this road I go
And why he never cared
I may never know
Eyes that often stared
No space for hearts to grow
Every moment shared
A price that I still owe
My soul forever impaired
Just want love to flow
You know, I still cry over the fact that he never even wished me a happy birthday this year and it was the only thing I even wanted. But I watch him tell other girls happy birthday. He makes me feel small and insignificant. He always does, he always has. As if he were born to make me regret ever being born. Crying now but whatever. As long as he sleeps at night, right?
I’ve never hurt like this before And I have hurt a hundred different ways Deserted near his open shore And I have lost 300 days Darkness now my only oar And so I sail his hopeless maze Hoping there is something more And a chance to catch his rays
The wind blows through with piercing cold sorrow The challenge is finding a purpose for tomorrow His lies burrow deep into a heart now hollow I once was his light but now I’m just his shadow
Out there on the horizon
A glimpse of redemption
While crawling over ice thinning
And tethers strained from the tension
As the distance slowly lengthens
Where the darkness comes to listen
Reflections rarely glisten
Just a sight of mostly deception
And fragile connections
No regrets for him I’m guessing
And I failed another lesson
Thinking love was a blessing
Not another interception
Not a secret obsession
Gifting only depression
His attention another direction
I get no affection
Not even a chance for selection
Just a ghost in another dimension
And my hate for him I’ll mention
Over and over in confession
With or without aggression
I’m at peace in this session
Writing bygones and rejection
What again was the question?
If shame were a crime, you reached perfection
Now go focus on another erection
And you better get tested for infection
Because you’ll stick it wherever there is exception
How much pussy is in your collection?
Disgusting vile worthless tool with zero potential
Back to where I started
Love evacuates for the broken hearted
Now assembling all the shattered pieces
Fuck forgiveness, I have a grievance
Hopeful is the day I’m laying in a plot
Worry is the love now tangled in a knot
Forgiveness is a treat and I never have that much
Love is the answer but you’ve clearly lost your touch
Rewind, fast forward, start again
All I wanted was a friend
I found myself within your world
I guess I’ll always be that girl…
What a despicable thing you have become
The tether rotted, the damage done
I’m not the only thing from which you run
My tears are flowing but you are having fun?
She’s with you now I know she is
I would rather die than keep going through this
I wish I had never felt your virtual kiss
I wish your name I could forget
The crest on my chest
It means faithfulness
Loyalty cannot be bought
But it is hard fought
I loved you whole didn’t I
So why the blood no matter how I try
I am stuck at your crossroads
In pieces and fragmented shadows
Over and over I go over this lesson But no answers tell where the pain will lessen Just as I’m stable you throw another grenade I’ve been wounded in ways you can’t hurt with a blade
Lost may you be but I love you the same Hate is your hand but love is my aim Stuck in quicksand and on a frozen route Clouds of confusion but still love you devout
I suppose it’s more than a name, more than a code of honor, more than a tattoo…
Loyalty and faithfulness, it doesn’t really mean anything this day and age…I live in the minority… (but Faith is my middle name)There was a time long ago when a name meant something… Loyalty is about as rare as my smile…How many more stones are you going to toss at me? Dead again…
Look away from the boy lost in his cell Look away from the monster creating his own hell Look away from the blood pouring from where we fell Look away from the moment his heart made your heart swell Look away from the pimp who never cares to ask if you are well Look away from the girls he has under his constant spell
Why doesn’t he care about me I wonder
Why does he fill my heart with thunder
Why does he disappear and I step with blunder
Why can’t I ever be his favorite number
Where does the sun hide when it goes under
Would he be interested in me if I were younger
Will his disease always keep him a runner
Can he crawl from his dark and squeeze into my summer
Please give me back the me that you stole
Please give me back the me that you control
Please give me back the me that makes you whole
Please kill the rest of me that you left cold
I need a gentle lover who is tough I need a firm hand that isn’t rough I need him to give me more when I’ve had enough I need him to remember I do stupid stuff
Always pain but never pleasure
The misery goes without measure
Found his love like a buried treasure
If I were to hate him, it would be never
Underneath that makeup her life is a wreck
I watch her dance with a noose tied around his neck
It seems he’s in a hurry to bounce her check
And if I’m ever seen, I must look a tiny speck
Does he know I’m different from other girls
I’ve never even owned a set of pearls
Where is the direction his love unfurls
Put me underneath him where my spirit swirls
I was in search of healing
My wings damaged, my knees in kneeling
A war with a monster, I never was winning
Narcissism will keep your head spinning
I was cleansing the root of my soul
I was tossing those sins in a hole
I was stitching my heart to feel again whole
And a couple years passed would you know
But one day there he was, I noticed, oh yes, I noticed His crown dragging behind his feet, it was a bust I’m not sure if it was his sin or a thick layer of dust Maybe it just hides behind a wall of his lust
I heard him mouthing words from his tongue like thunder Such fury, where does it come from, I still wonder Crashing down curiosities is where I fell under I slipped into his words, then love, and I became her
I remember the day I left him a compliment
I thought it was a bomb the way he responded
My hand was bitten and he was so blunt
I still stick around but he is on the hunt
Sometimes I would find pieces of me in his words The dinner bell rang and we rushed in like buzzards Little seeds of hope we would nibble like birds There may have been red flags but we ignored all the hazards
Like favorite pets except for me
I come around, he gets angry
But I still don’t know how to leave
It’s impossible, I love him you see
Does he hate me because I see through his mask, or because I see through his mask and still love him? Maybe, just maybe, I’m not a bird he wants to eat? Or does he hate me because I stole her shoes? I’m not giving them back, they fit my feet and I have tiny feet. I found my missing slipper, gosh dang it, he needs to get over it. They’re mine now. MINE I SAID. Just like I belong to him, he just doesn’t know it yet. He is lost. But I found him so I’m hoping he’s only half lost now. Knock knock, Neo, it’s me, the one…open the door
I am changing, but can others see?
When looking at other pictures, that cannot be me
Spent a lifetime trying to figure out who I was and now I am free
Free from all the locks and chains where I never had a key
And while there is still sorrow, I am an open sea
I am drowning on my back but I am floating carelessly
Underneath, the pull of the current A shark is circling with massive courage And dark is the sky and my eyes keep burning And long are the lessons we never are learning Life will drown you if death is a burden But I will fall down loving him, one thing is certain…
Do I ever make you feel good? Do you focus on the bad, longer than you should? If you trusted me, could I peek under your hood? If you don’t love me, do you ever think you could?
Every cloud passing by another prayer
In your thoughts, I wonder, am I there?
Is there ever a moment, where you care?
Of all the ones you’ve loved, how did I compare?
Slipping down now is the rain
Coming down to greet me another pain
Unfamiliar, surrounding terrain
And here I linger, here I dwell, here I remain
Life is just full of decay
I slowly watch love fade to grey
And if I die well I was dead anyway
If I die, that’s just the price we pay
Halloween has passed and still themes of death, oh goodie, I’m still me. Survivor of spells and curses, adding that to my portfolio. Let’s compare resumes. The new modern age of dick comparing. My debt is bigger than yours. Oops, I meant dick, I mean house. Wait, what the fuck are we talking about again? Dick, yes, need. CHOCOLATE, I NEED CHOCOLATE (shut up hormones) ((my ovaries are literally in a knife fight right now, I would apologize but my cycles follow the Moon))
This tho, yasssss HORNY CREEP yeps, not gonna apologize about that either. My drive ain’t hurting nobody. IS YOURS?
What islands must we breach, in a faraway dreamland, where the habits we keep, are safely out of reach, and the love we share, is a language we can finally comprehend?
What mystical gardens must we sow, where joy and hope is the grain that we grow, and your hand is the vine, connected to the very root of my soul?
What maps must we hunt, what fear do we uncover, that leads me to the forest where you are my lover?
What secrets do we bury, so your mask is less heavy, and my shadow will feel more like a friend not in a hurry?
What ship must I sail, on what troubles do we travail, will you follow me out of hell, can you live to tell our tale (what if I fail)?
What skin must we shed, what sorrow do we part, show me through the doors, that will lead to your heart, past the halls of the longing, through the deeds where we get our first start?
PoeEternal 