Thin

Energy can’t be destroyed
Iron gates can’t stop what God deployed
A toxic giant void
Overly paranoid
Or just just ignored


They’re all for her
Illogical
Every single word
I observe
I’m just a neurotic girl
He uses to rise and stir
And I concur
He wants forever
Just in another world


I come
But then I’m gone
Lost on the run
I understand
But then I’m dumb
I jump
But then I’m stunned
I speak
Then tongue is wrung
I won’t compete
Unless I’ve won


All you ever care about is the life you built
What is it but an island of guilt


You ripple the fabric of time
Dropping poems like pebbles
But who out there should feel each wave
As if were all mine?


My love, I can’t block the fabric of time or my love for you.
I’ve tried endlessly to.
Cutting out the need like truth.
I lie to do.

My love, I smell your fear and read it as silence.
And while my hands are small they hold such violence.
My light gets lost in your iris.
But I would die for this.


Stop using me to bleed
Cut you from my feed
Amputate the need
Your evil seed


Look at me all frail and pale
A ghostly figure freckled with fright
Look at all the shite I write
It’s best if I stay out of sight


I block the channel
But can’t stop the feed
I numb existence
Just not the need


Why do you give out your fruit
To awful prey
She’s dug a root
You’re just her slave


I’ve had just about enough of this bandwagon
Exiting stage right quickly to abandon
Sick of watching other hearts you stuff and over fatten
Meanwhile there’s a spotlight on every fault that’s ever happened

I’ve spent enough time following this circus
To simply know this isn’t our purpose
But your mask is her clown behind an ugly curtain
And you’ll never change, this we know for certain


There’s a thick layer of doubt
Enveloped over more doubt
Hope is now in drought
I’m lost en-route
There’s no love about


He’s all beast in cardigan
Lying every second if he can
All over earth they span
His name is man


I’ve got very fine silks growing from my head
Still they call me dead


Leave me alone to rot
Let hope decay
Find my love an empty plot
The cost too high to pay


You’re better than a pyramid scheme
Riding piggyback over her every broken dream
Her methods outdated and obscene
She’s a copycat queen


I set myself apart
Too many broken feet
Trying to compete
For the best of me
I’m not meat
For them to eat
But they try and feast
In a frenzy
Still tied and chained
To mistakes yet more they seek
Well I’m not weak


You’re better than that wheel of fakery


Not your enemy
Not your friend
You got empathy
Just not my hand

Not your ally
Not your wife
You got power
But still cause strife

Not your favorite
Not your worst
You got popularity
But I’m still first


Why are you still hanging out with that gang?
Riding the fake ass gravy train
Hopping bandwagon after bandwagon under her name
She’s hoping for fame
You’re missing your game


He’s got alot of money, he’ll even call you friend
But he will only make you feel cheaper in the end
He’s got alot of money, but not a spine for him to stand
And I’ll kick his ass if he ever comes ’round here again


Safety ever an illusion
Tiptoeing over delusion
Frozen lakes of confusion
This hand is for losin’


He doesn’t want me for himself
He doesn’t want me with anyone else
He doesn’t want me for himself
He doesn’t want me


Tell me, when mountains crumble beneath your feet
When you’ve got a tongue, but no breath to speak
When your knees are trembling and you’ve fallen weak
Is it ever me you think you need?


He won’t support me month after month for my work
And he’s got more rooms than he can fill
I’m tired of even trying
When to the world I have no worth


I’m all nerve endings
Pockets lined with anxiety


I am pen within pen
Leaking under skin
Bleeding from within
Marching forward
Chained to sin
Our time is thin

© Delia Ross. 2020 @poeeternal #poeeternal


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