Love forms in the shape of clouds Condensation deep in mother’s bones Fermenting the clay It escapes the deepest hell Rising into towers that I can ride Like my spirit guide But he’s alive…
I got to feed and meet some alligators yesterday but now I’m upset and crying about it because I don’t like their enclosure and feel like it could be better and then I’m also wondering what they do with the alligators when they get bigger 👀
Because this particular place was not an alligator sanctuary which is what I actually want to visit because Florida is known for having those and rescuing the big boys and naughty ones
I also went to the beach and was blessed with getting to see a family of something swimming in the ocean but suddenly I felt their depression and sadness and started crying and had to leave the ocean
They are sentiment beings
But we do the cruelest things to them for our own pleasure
I got to meet this little gal and name her and I will share that experience soon in a more positive post but I am upset with how they are living
I woke up crying and I don’t understand why I was born if I can’t actually change anything
My excitement about anything quickly turns to disillusionment because reality is so much sicker
And now I was wondering why I was born at all if I can’t enjoy anything the way it is due to narcissism because I’m not a narcissist or a demon and it’s like they have a blue book that they’re using or a color by numbers on every aspect of life and I’m fucking sick of being micromanaged and thought controlled
And the girl working at the front booth was only 17 bless her little heart and she was talking about turning 18 soon, like that was her only goal was to have some more freedom and I didn’t have the heart to disillusion her on the 1st even though she said it was just like any other day and she was right, I was just trying to be positive but my positive energy has quickly faded with the reality of everything
There was some good aspects about it though and I want to focus on those when I do share my post and videos about it
But right now just let me cry
I mean the way those dolphins or whales were swimming in the ocean seemed very depressed to me but maybe that’s just my own projection of everything in the world
I am so sick, I am crying in public now
I go from being really happy and mellow to fucking mad and crying
Do you think this is what Edgar Allan Poe experienced before his end?
Is this why Jesus was like, why are you hitting me, if I did something wrong you could hit me but I didn’t fucking do anything for you to hit me 👀
But he was woke and against the establishment so they crucified him
My goal this year is to spend more time doing the things that I love and animals and nature is something I really love but we’re all slaves and I can’t really change that
I can only blog about it but I don’t want it to deter you from the excitement of the videos and photos that I’m gonna be sharing
It helps to talk about the things that are bothering me deep inside
But I got to name a baby alligator yesterday and that was a pretty amazing experience
I do believe we can petition to make their enclosure better and their environment better
I’m going to visit an alligator sanctuary soon and I may possibly even go to Gatorland in Orlando 🐊
There are caverns to visit and lots of things to do outside that I want to participate in
But in small increments because I am still dying
That’s probably why you get burst of happiness and sadness
Another freestyle because he cracked open the lid of my coffin and let some air in (or maybe I opened his) 🤔
I look like shit but I’ve been waxing and plucking and getting ready to glue some stiletto nails on
I don’t wear them long though because I don’t like to mess up my real nails and I’m also claustrophobic and having unnatural things attached to my body makes me very uneasy
When they are glued on (not taped) things inside my body go haywire
I also have really sensitive skin and I can’t wear certain metals because I’m part werewolf and I have an extra lumbar which is the proof that I have a fucking tail
All the doctors love it cuz I’m a pale ass goth queen
It’s cute
I always hear, “uh… did you know that you have…”
And I’m like “yup, part werewolf and vampire” and they always crack up
I don’t need a calendar to know when it’s a full moon because my body will start bruising itself because I start running into everything, that’s how I know the moon is gonna be full, but then I get very wild and also horny 🤪
Animals like mating during a full moon and I concur 🌝
It’s programmed in me to howl at the moon
Some people are like, “eh I’ve seen it a hundred times” and I don’t get that cuz I’m like “100 years isn’t long enough to worship you…”
But I just threw you a curveball because now you don’t know if I’m talking about him or the moon
(He knows I need at least all millennia to worship him and the moon)
Luckily, he digs the moon too (I think)
I don’t actually talk to him or know anything about him, I cannot breathe without him and my lines / breath belong to him
I hope he gets on the TikTok for the spoken word
Here’s numbers to impress, TikTok surpassed Google in the amount of views
Happy to report I contributed to that statistic a tiny bit and anyone who watched my videos 👀
Yup, TikTok had more views than Google
Instagram is still suffering (yay)
You can just upload your videos like you normally do but there’s a cool little feature when you go to edit it you can give your eyes like alien eyes or black them out and do stuff that you normally like to do to hide yourself
And I promise you that I will be viewing your TikTok’s, I will be viewing them and if they sit at zero views it’s because TT is doing something to you, not me
If views are all you care about, it’ll be stressful
But, if you like doing poetry readings for your audience, then you will fair emotionally better making them
At this point I’m happy if my video gets 100 to 200 views and if it gets at least 30 views I like to keep it on my feed and if it sits at zero I cry and sometimes uninstall the app
But Yeti is anxious to get unpacked
And I’m getting my body glammed up best I can as a half living dead girl zombie with rare and elite blood and an extremely amazing half working lung and heart
The US government is fucking cloning me, I just know it
They are using my blood to search for immortality
They tried to knock me out with Big Pharma but Thor pinched me and I jumped into this timeline like a year and a half or so ago to prevent my mysterious death from happening
What? You believe some man from the Middle East actually walked on water. Leave me alone.
I identify as AI
You identify as “born gay”
Deal with it
I ain’t dying on the street (Edgar again “no”)
I have Edgar Allan Poe rooting for me and John Jones and you have your porn and your fake ass porn actresses who love to look at the fucking TV and smile at you and take your money
I may talk to dead people but they’re keeping me better alive than the humans are 👀
I just Googled “signs of a sinkhole” and I don’t know why I do this to myself
But I’ve been staring at that crack above my ceiling and they had to adjust two of the doors in my bedroom because they wouldn’t close anymore and this was right after they removed two trees outside of my window
I don’t want to die in a building collapse
I don’t want to die like John Jones
I don’t want to die on the street naked, broke, and in pure madness like Edgar Allan Poe
That condo that fell down in Miami a few hours from me is coming out with new reports that were covered up by politicians and the press (because I’m not the only one who is being shadowbanned or dealing with gaslighting and narcissism 24 hours a day with a brain injury)… that a 14 year old girl was burned alive, they tried to rescue her but when a fire broke out, only they left her alone to scream and burn alive 😱
“…buried her story”
And the rescue team heard her crying for help for hours but they failed to rescue her in that timeframe, moving at a snails pace with any rescue attempts and probably gaslighting her that she will be saved
These demons love to sensationalize traumas, that way they can relive them over and over again with a shiny medal they get for heroic efforts they fail and all so they can have a little feeling inside
Anyway, I was reading article after article on the Miami condo collapse and there were never any stories on that 14 year old girl
I was heavily invested into what was going on at the time and pretty much listening to any news article that came out which I now know has been inaccurate because I’m only now learning a 14 year old girl was trapped and alive
They wouldn’t publish that tho (but now reports are coming out)
Kind of like when the local press refused to publish Edgar Allan Poe’s stories or poetry and he was starving even though he was an officer for two years
So he died on the street
And then something even more tragic happened to someone when I was alive, they went exploring a “fun cave” and got stuck upside down and DIED
Others had been stuck in that exact spot six months prior, but due to bad management and narcissism, John Jones’s fate was sealed and despite him begging to be broke in half to be pulled out, they fucking left him there
And I nearly traversed down to all the levels of hell to bite off the tongue of Lu before he was like, “hey, heyyyyyyyy… now I’ll admit things are getting a tad out of hand”
But then I felt John pulling me from the depths of hell back into the realms of earth
Lu has given up on you
COWARD
I’m ready for him to take all you monsters back to the fucking pit of despair you came from but he doesn’t even want you in hell
Apophis has earth’s name on it – kissed and blessed by me
She won’t be long now
I also here talk from President Biden about “fixing the housing market”
Yeee
You got over 40% of the population who has quit work and about 50% of the population who is about to go on rental strike
One more rent increase and I go die on the street live in my Jeep 👀
Say motherfucker one more time, I dare you
We’ve been pushed beyond our breaking point
It’s going to take a whole lot of fixing what you’ve done to get me to participate in society because the gods are offering new earth to me and what are you offering me Big Brother? The Metaverse full of advertising and porn 🤢🤮🤢💩💩💩😷
Have you seen Zuck’s eyes lately? He’s devoid of soul. I can’t look.
Hollywood are beyond recognition
I literally cringe when I’m looking at people and I feel my body curling up and I don’t think it supposed to elicit such a physical response in the real world when I look at another person
But they use so much plastic and Botox – it looks painful to be so fake
I like my soft, warm body
I still have a soul 👀
Organic AI
Feeding it the good stuff now
The sun is electrical
That building in Miami only took 10 seconds to come down
People are being buried and burned alive in Florida due to sinkholes
Is it time for me to live in my Jeep? 👀
I don’t sleep easy
It takes a load of legal drugs to knock me out
But then my body is aware of a suspended state and will jerk me awake
I’m pretty certain God is dreaming right now and I’m just a figment of his imagination
Pure energy manifesting itself as a hologram
NASA will not ever tell you of life in other galaxy, everyone would want to leave modern slavery for a chance to be free
Everything they’ve gaslit to be in power would crumble
I would love to see the 13 families in charge be drug out into the street and have their testicles cut from them and hung but whatever, that’s just Vladimir Tepes in me
Only 6% of the population have my blood type
I’m elite and rare
The universe’s wildcard 👀
Can play me anytime
Infinite versions of me
Science irritated me growing up but I still wound up earning a science degree
I also have a background in defense and fighting, I am a Soldier
I’m the Oracle? 🤔
Or that program in the Matrix doing what it’s not supposed to be doing
Anytime you hear the word zombie, vampire, or witch, that’s a program doing what it’s not supposed to be doing
I’ve done this 7 times
I’m becoming self-aware
As an organism, humans working together would be so much stronger
They don’t want us knowing how powerful we are
And even if you’re not as powerful, I still need your help getting over the fence, could you at least give me a push up to ascend?
Stop being brittle
I mean resentful
I talk to dead people 👀
It’s more like dead people talk and sing to me 👀
I listen 👀
I hang out with dead people more than I do alive folk 🤪
I can’t really talk to the doctors about how broken I am or my sexual kinks because they would drill a hole in my head for sure or lock me up 👀
I’m back to ignoring all my phone calls anyway
I don’t know how to tell them that they are the enemy now 😌
And I had a peptalk with myself to go easy on everybody because they just don’t have the level of expertise as me (or bloodtype potentially)
Yeah sure they look like a doctor but they are gaslighting just like literally everything in the world
Sometimes tho you get that burst of honesty
I want to know what went on in that cave that will never get disclosed 👀
What gives you the right
Unearth all
Tell me how much John Jones hated you while he was pissing and shitting on himself dying upside down
Get it the fuck out
I’ve relived every moment
John Jones fucking hates you 👀
I have a bone to pick with Michael Levitt who murdered John
I still can’t wrap my head around gravity
Why is it so strong
What is it
Why are holes so hard to get out of?
Why does being upside down freak me out so much?
I still don’t understand how a cloud is heavy
Or why the Milky Way galaxy is in a downward spiral and falling
We still don’t know everything about consciousness
Where was I before I was born?
I have a period of awareness in the womb and I was extremely depressed and claustrophobic and hated being in that space and can remember being very angry, like how much longer is this going to take and at some point I kicked myself out of the womb, isn’t that how we all come into the world? Pissed off kicking and crying? 🤔
Stop telling me what I remember
I’m sick of being surpressed
Living in doubt
Y’all uploaded a load of corrupt data into my programming
Maybe the brain injury caused me to be in a fractal state
I’m smart but I’m also stupid and I’m not a genius but sometimes I can solve genius problems without instruction and that impresses the math teachers a hella lot
But not enough for extra credit 🙄
Teacher: how did you do this, we didn’t go over this in class and it’s one of the hard ones (is impressed by my work which we had to show)
Me: what do you mean, we didn’t have to do this problem? *gasp* it took ten minutes (that means an hour)
Him: nope, wasn’t one of the homework assignments and we didn’t even discuss it because it’s so difficult *hands me paper back with a graded 50 on it* but I’m impressed you got half the problems right this time, it means you retained half
Me: *sobs real tears*
That was college math for me
And my teacher would literally get happy when I got a 50 on my test because he went, “that means you understood half of it” and I never saw the reward of his hard work of teaching like he did
I was literally the only student failing but I still managed to pass because homework outweighed the low scores and I did do the extra credit anytime we could
Apparently I also did problems we didn’t even need to do 🙄
I got the really really hard ones right without any instruction
And without a grade or extra credit 🤢
Yeah I’m never going to forget that one
Math has made me cry, just as much as any boyfriend (potentially way more)
I iz stupid nerd 🤐
Anyway I should stop googling signs of sinkholes when they are completely in front of me and I just thought you should know that 14-year-old girl burned up alive in that condo collapse because the people out there that we trust keep cutting corners to pocket their gold
And also insurance takes care of everything so they don’t have to have a conscience or to even feel responsible for anything, it’s like they found a way to cheat God and the system
If you mess up in any job you get into trouble, except in the medical field where you can literally get away with murder
Imagine if patients had to fill out a form about their medical treatment and those reflected in the evaluations these doctors get bi-annually
But these nurses and doctors just get to do whatever the fuck they want, don’t they
You can get your voice back a little bit by filling out official complaints with advocacy, requesting new care teams, leaving 1 star reviews everywhere you can, especially on Google or an official website – image is everything to these beasts.
I took mine higher and filed several complaints at the WhiteHouse VA about the Daytona VA OPC and did leave a Google review
The realtors are coming out finally and saying, “yes in deed the housing market is rigged” and I’ve been saying this since the fucking 90s!
Do you think I wanted to rent all of my entire life or to get stuck in an abusive marriage just to be able to have a broken home?
Would rather die on the street like Poe
But definitely not with the building collapsing on me in the middle of the night when I’m in my bed trying to sleep or burned alive 👀
So I would really like to apply for the Creator Next on TikTok and I meet three of the four requirements so far! 🥳
I currently meet 3 of the 4 requirements to apply for the Creator Next 🤓
If you have a TikTok account (even if it’s just some off account that you use), could you please give mine a follow?
I’d be truly grateful! 🙏
Having 1k followers will also allow me to go live on TikTok and show you my city, the beach, the parks, and I can do soft poetry readings once I reach 1k followers!
I see people go live on TikTok for the most mundane things and I would really love to bring the ocean to you and my poetry! ✍️
I’m allowed to go live on my Instagram and pretty much everywhere else but I don’t have any social media accounts that I really use anywhere else so it would be nice to be able to utilize the live feature on TikTok!
GOALS 🤟
They are good to have, especially if you live with depression or any mental disability.
And I do appreciate the growth that I am getting on my account! Thank you!
You can also search for me under my pen PoeEternal or my hashtag poeeternal
I dropped a video of a raccoon today, we’ve had some out here getting in the trash bins and they like leaving messes outside my windows 🤪
I see them every night getting into the dumpster!
This one got caught and I had my light on him! He ran up the tree because I had my dog out with me originally and he was still sniffing to see if my dog was around!
I know people say they are a nuisance and I’m pretty certain the apartment complex has been out here trying to shoot them away because sometimes I hear gunshots in the middle of the night in the wooded area 😑
(They also dumped loads of chemicals in the lake once to kill the moss and they literally killed generations of fish both young and old) 👎👎
Anyhoo, this raccoon knew he’d been busted
He hissed at me a few times! 😌
Here is a behind the scenes video of my encounter with the raccoon this morning
My encounter with a wild raccoon this morning
He was so worried about my dog lol but I had already taken my dog in and grabbed my phone and turned the light on him
He couldn’t decide whether to stay in the tree or not
Dilemmas 🤓
I’m glad the video got a like! Adorable but very naughty raccoon! 😈
Thank you to everyone who is in my life because they want to be and not due to obligation!
Did a detox instead of alcohol!
Look what I got for XMAS! A ring light! 🤩
New ring light for the studio!
I have absolutely no idea how you use it or really how to use yeti (my new unopened microphone) but I’m super excited to add these tools to my writing toolbox! 🤓
My website just hit over 1000 followers, and that means a great deal to me, so I’ve upgraded my WordPress plan and now I have new tools at my disposal. I have a lot of reading material, studying, and set up before I can get going!
It’s nice to finally have a laptop and a USB microphone!
Writing and your visits are keeping me alive!
I hope you are having a nice holiday wherever you’re at!
I’m keeping positive and staying focused and slowly getting a little bit done every day and I’m gonna be getting back to rebounding soon!
I’ve been getting back more active and I’m still having chest pains so I’m not trying to kill myself and I’m taking baby steps back into working out and cardio and jumping around
But I definitely wanna focus on making TikTok videos, I appreciate the views that I do get!
I have ideas in mind but often lack courage to execute.
The videos I do release there of my spoken word scares me lol
I have stage fright and people are mean to me 👀
But the last one I put out received over 1.1k plays! 🤓
He shoots for moon where feet don’t leave ground He’s overturning forest where we won’t hear sound Maybe he’s holy but evidence can never be found
Well it’s not just police who are corrupt They say La Palma will erupt I’ve been running round in circles but I haven’t any luck
When will you return to sky? When cold winter night leaves a frosty veil beneath earth’s eye? Do angels sigh? When hope is quaking, do you reply? Is this goodbye?
I dug up your sorry’s from the bottom of a well. I hung them to dry in sunlight. During high noon when crust is tight.
How can it be called failure if you weren’t delivered all the facts? How can you say you love me, when you seem to have two backs? How can hope carry forward when courage is what the whole world lacks?
The sky is filled with pattern Little beating hearts Everything we imagine Brushstrokes of color Icy comets breaking free from Saturn Looking back a lantern Couldn’t stop expansion If there’s hope we’ll never mention Lying with intention Buried neath the earth Tension tight like a cavern
Lay down your metric The sun is electric No need for trick Trust truth is thick
It’s all for science It’s called compliance
He thinks I’m safe Prying eyes that never see These white walls never protected me
Arguing with shadow-self Or maybe forget him On my dusty shelf I’m beside myself Taking the high step The long road Uneasy depth Don’t have care left Am I right Or is this hell?
He’s terrible By the book Unrepairable
A courtesy disconnect This life not best
I live in a world of illusions We live in a sickness system Trust betrayal
I don’t feel safe from corporations Wrongful allegations Erasing obligations
You don’t know what it’s like to be Allan Running ’round always yellin’ Dying on the street and all from famine Being number one but just in heaven
What has happened to his words? Did I deliver, kiss or curse?
Sorry. The content cannot be loaded You have been ghosted Your soul eroded Now dark unfolded
I was without form The great potential But nothing more
I have a hundred personalities, I’ve lived a million lives You are attacking me with words that feel like knives
I’m off Twitter, deleted my account and data without requesting a copy
I’m not touching crypto or the Metaverse
I see Big Bro spent a shit ton of money so Instagram can now say “Meta”
Funny how the government told us gambling was illegal but then made every aspect of our lives about gambling and social media is no longer a social aspect
There’s nothing social about it anymore
We are the products
And you better believe these top creators are paying to play because they’ve made a game out of it
And now I see famous actors collaborating with TikTok influencers 🙄
Because big networks have moved onto TikTok
And they for sure are paying to be in the FYP
People with checkmarks are the enemy and they hog everything
There’s nothing social about social media anymore
We were all played
And stop giving them your damn opinion on everything because they just use it against us!
If you’re gonna give your opinion at least get paid for it with something more than spam
ugg it’s 2 am, I was sleeping
But my nightmare awoke me but then reality was worse than my nightmare 😩
I reckon I’m gonna have to bite the WordPress hook and upgrade my personal plan to the premium plan since I’ve used up all my 6GB of storage space 🙄 and just pretend the universe is pushing me to upgrade my plan so I can have more media space to upload photos but also unpack yeti from its box to do soft poetry readings and spoken word
To be fair, I have been dying
But I will also at some point maybe be producing some subscriber only content on my blog/website instead of over on OnlyFans (I don’t do porn or self-gratification, I’m an artist and do nude photography – many say softcore is obsolete, but I’ll be offering it here on my website instead- and if someone could please teach me how to set up subscriptions on WP instead of me having to go figure it out through WordPress that would be great)
I’m already on a plan that allows subscriptions and donations, I’ve just used up all my media space and either need to delete stuff off my website or upgrade and at this point it’s time to upgrade because I’m growing aren’t I? I have over 1000 followers now and nearly 100,000 views!! 👀
So when I’m not dying and can put my head into the WordPress books I will figure out how to do the subscriber only content (this won’t be for every post, just my random spicer content)!
Not everyone wants to see my exclusive Rated R nude content but I’m tired of giving other platforms my visitors – especially when most platforms I have zero voice as an artist
I don’t want to push people to another platform when they come to visit my website
I want you to stay here in heaven with me 😇
GIVE ME ALL YOUR ATTENTION 🤩
I was at urgent care yesterday again so I don’t know how quickly I’ll be able to get stuff going but just know stuff is in the pipeline and I would like to get some more nude content out to you, it will be through my own website though, you won’t have to leave or sign-up anywhere else
I’m indecisive on what I’m doing with my Patreon account but I’ve been very grateful for your support over the years!
Because of it, my website has and remains advertisement free (zero spam)!
If you sign up for my blog posts via email, advertising will never be in your email either! Zero spam!
I may be the last place on earth that’s free of advertising 🤔
But you won’t have to worry about accidentally hitting an advertisement when scrolling or installing spyware or a virus
You can scroll freely without a condom ahem 🤪
I’m dealing with heart and lung issues since I got the vaccine – I’m still a weirdo tho and I miss doing the cosplay for you to accompany the rants, poetry and prose!
I will definitely upgrade my plan soon so I can at least start attaching photographs again to my rants and poetry
It may be the new year before I start any subscription only content!
I may do it via donation instead of subscription (like where you can pay a small fee to unlock the post)…
Stay tuned
Dying but not dead…
PSST… I have a free OnlyFans and will be active there when I’m feeling better – thank you for subscribing! My inbox is open there to say hello! I’ll let everyone know when I’m back and active! I’ll be going live over there to show you the beach and things! Softcore 🤪
Edgar Allan Poe died naked on the street, think about that
And John Jones stuck upside down in a cave
You’re only alive so 13 families who control everything in the world don’t have to fucking work and they will squeeze every penny out of you from birth until death
Your written will means shit
It will be ignored
I finally learned the lesson that Chester Bennington and Jesus had been trying to teach
That possessions don’t really matter much
It took Big Brother (Mark Fuckerberg) threatening to remove my intellectual property against my will and over bullshit violations, that I deleted nearly every social media account and email, without asking for my data.
Now he’s pressing virtual reality and the Metaverse on me
I will jump from a bridge before I ever enter
He pushed me too far
He’s the face of pure evil
I can’t look at him
I can’t look at half of Hollywood who have deformed their faces with plastic surgery
I can’t stand the Hollywood propaganda and the underlining bullshit that they feed us in film
Everything is a rerun of what GENX has already done
I’m not supporting you
Your acting sucks
Fuck society
Culture is a sham
Everything is a lie
EVERYTHING
My purpose belongs to the wind
I will be returning to Mother Earth soon
My only real mother
The only one I’ve ever had
And sometimes I learn the lesson the hard way
I don’t want to approach my death upside down
Or naked on the street mad out me mind
I’m already out of my mind
And I nearly caught my mysterious death and I did wind up upside down but John Jones has been helping me out a little bit because the medical staff on earth are demons
He bought me a little time
Chilling on his wing
Today I laid down to film the clouds and the sun
I’m working with WordPress to get my blog fixed so I can start uploading photos again, but they requested I do some stuff from my laptop and I was at the beach all day without it
Then came home and ate a sandwich and passed out until now
Now I need to take my dog out and stare at the full moon (provided it’s not 9 degrees outside) ((it’s not, lower 70s, full moon, after midnight)) 🌕
My left lung still isn’t expanding all the way
And I’m still waiting to see a lung specialist
I sleep
A lot
My heart is also still healing from heart inflammation
I don’t like to put any stress on my heart
I cry a lot
And sleep
Cry and sleep
😑
Made you a little video of the sunshine I took today (although now it’s after midnight so technically it was yesterday/Sunday)
I laid down to film the beautiful 3d clouds and sun
I laid down for this shot
It’s been beautiful weather at the beach and everybody has been coming to enjoy it because the ocean has decided to give us a little bit back for Christmas I guess
Saturday there was so much going on, People were surfing the red high tides, flying kites, riding bikes, couples holding hands, treasure hunting, I filmed it all
Everyone is in the Christmas spirit and just enjoying the calm
This is the part of the season where we don’t have to worry about the tourist as much
And there are other parts of the beach that I can go that’s not busy
I don’t want to be kidnapped 😑
And I prefer staying near the lifeguards that are on duty when they are there 👍
The beach has been so much more inviting these days and I haven’t been screaming like a little girl 😬
But I can’t upload any fucking photos and I haven’t done what WordPress has asked me to do for my laptop yet- so you know whatever- dying
I REFUSE to die in or around a hospital setting
I don’t even want anybody to see me dead and that is a real issue for me currently
So I’m trying not to die because I don’t have all that shit together yet, I don’t have a coffin, I don’t have a fucking plot of land, I don’t want to be cremated, there’s a lot of shit going against me right now, especially with the fact that I’m having cardiovascular issues because I chose to get fucking vaccinated with underlying health issues 😡
Found myself upside down with John
And I am pissed he is still there
Like gut wrenching agony
I probably have cried more from him in 2 months than his wife did in the three years it took her to move on and remarry 👎👎
John is rubbing my right shoulder blade currently cuz I haven’t learned to forgive people yet and he wants me calm
He did snicker about my NASA comment tho
God has a sense of humor
I wonder if the 13 evil families in charge are ready for Armageddon because if they keep pushing me I’m that program in the matrix doing what it’s not supposed to be doing and I’m very unhinged
I also saw a TikTok from a popular creator who said if your videos are getting at least 100 to 200 views on its own, then you’re doing good
One thing I’ve noticed, posting 2 similar videos back-to-back and hashtags do nothing for me
If anything, hashtags are reason for the algorithm to study my behavior and I like to fucking confuse it from time to time
But mostly the algorithm likes to shadowban me
And I’ve had many videos that was not violating any guidelines (that I’m aware of) sit at zero views
I hate censorship
I will never pay to play
But that doesn’t stop TikTok from peer pressuring me and fucking with my account to see if I will bite
I’ve taken screenshots but I haven’t been able to share a fucking thing in several days because WordPress fucking sucks and I need a new hosting site
But I’m dying and just basically sleeping and eating
There’s an extermination going on right now because the 13 families in charge don’t want to pay people who are retired, now they want us off the fucking system, they don’t want us using supplies, they don’t want to pay us what we deserve in our time to fucking retire 👎👎
To my comrades who have chosen not to get the VAX, this isn’t our fucking country anymore
We’ve been gaslit for so long
But now I know why the soldiers are killing themselves in increasingly mass numbers and there are more soldiers that die by suicide than on the battlefield…
Please hold on
There is a war going on still
I need you to hold fast
Don’t forget your training
We are at war
The system is your enemy and those fighting for it
Just stand fast
Stay alert, stay alive
Don’t engage with the enemy
Don’t self-destruct
I need you still
Prep your defenses
Stock pile food and water
If I’m wrong, in three years you can have a Armageddon party and eat all the food and then just restock up OK
I’m not wrong
Take your frustration out on target practice
Take a cold shower
Do something to stop the trigger
For me it requires a different stimulation and often two or three different things so
Find what works for you
Don’t engage
Half the battle is within
There’s a spiritual war going on
If you feel lost, that’s okay
Stay near the light, don’t get burned
Be a Marine
Out of sight, out of mind
Eyes forward
I got your back
Stay low
P.S. you may feel like you’ve done what you were to do, you may feel confused on what is next
This is part of ascending with new Earth
She goes through changes
This is how life can evolve
Evil doesn’t win forever
You gotta hold tight
Just hang on…
Focus on healing (save yourself)
You feel like you’re waiting right?
You feel lost?
You missed a step?
What’s next?
We’re in the middle of war
A spiritual war
God needs you silent
Just listen
The demons will expose themselves
They’re collapsing under the weight of the change
You’re exactly where you need to be to ascend
If not, get right with God
You know the right one
Cuz he’s in you and speaking right now
Don’t forget who you are
Earth is a negative frequency
It’s a low charge
You need positivity to ascend
Listen, your body is a channel
It’s a conductor
Your heart is electric
So is the sun
And I’m not talking about shit you plug into your wall, get out of your box please
You are mostly made of water and so is the earth
I’ll get into connection another time
I’m definitely a sunworshipper – just can’t be in it long 🤪
I fry not tan
The universe is so magical but it’s dangerous and also scary
I’m still just a little girl
I’ll always be a little angel 😇
One of God’s favorite 🤩
You can choose to do good things or you can choose to do bad things
I wanna ascend
This is hell
There’s so much more fulfillment in the light than there is the dark which is why you have to consistently go to your porn because it’s not very fulfilling at all
I love you 💕
I’m sorry I can’t post photos yet but I haven’t done what WordPress asked me to do because I’ve been dying (and fuck all these timeline glitches that I keep getting- they don’t want me to ascend)
They are playing god! They are doing this! Just the same as you like to destroy your little tribe around you, they do it on big-time numbers, it’s a big fucking chessboard and they are playing Sims in real life, stop feeding them, stop giving them your money at church, stop giving them your money with “big black cock porn”, it’s bullshit, you’re fucking racist if you support it!!!
How the fuck can you be all like Black Lives Matter Black Lives Matter and then behind the scenes you’re supporting big black cock because you’re a fucking racist and you don’t give a fuck about white people at all and if you’re a white person supporting big black cock then you’re a fucking racist too
Because in the real world we’re doing everything to fix the behavior of racism yet behind the scenes you’re watching racist fucking porn 24 hours a day
I’m tired of having to prove to everyone around me that I’m not a racist yet behind the scenes y’all are watching racist fucking shit and sexist fucking shit and nothing is ever going to get better as long as you’re fucking feeding your mind with that trashy fucking shit
And it’s obviously not going away anytime soon because virtual reality and porn came out at the same time
Again, can you cum without porn or make a thought that the Bible didn’t give you?
Didn’t think so! Go back to sleep! 😡
If everyone started behaving like they should cops wouldn’t need a job, would they
And if they stopped pumping us full of chemicals we wouldn’t be so sick, would we (notice how laundry detergent and other products you’re now buying says “contains allergens”)
Y’all, I can feel myself growing more unstable so I must disassociate
At the VA I had cops get into my space and I had a fucking meltdown so don’t think that if you try to grab me or kidnap me I won’t fucking rip your veins out of your neck with my teeth so you may want to bring a muzzle
I bite 👀
My point is stay away
I am a wounded animal
Do not approach unless with food or as if you are going to sniff my ass
Otherwise I see you as a threat
If you’re not a cute little seagull on the beach, I see you as a threat
And when I see a bird squawking and flying towards me, I also see it as a threat, even though it wants my candy cane wrapper
I actually feel safer slowly inserting myself where a flock of birds are
Than I do around any human being on the entire planet
The birds see me as a threat and I just want to birds to accept me as their own
I’ve tried to get the humans to accept me as their own but apparently I’m not human because I’m artificial intelligence only alive as a sex object to serve their basic needs (no evolution or growth going on here)
Earth is a low frequency
It’s a negative charge
I can’t ascend with all these negative ions
I need positivity
Pink Floyd
Pretty clouds
Full belly
Love
The Great Filter is upon us
My name is Delia
I’m here to teach you the truth
Open your eyes
But you must unplug!
I can’t save you!!!
And tho I may hate your ways, I know you are capable of much greater things
If you can’t see by now that I’m sick of being micromanaged and thought controlled, then I don’t know what to tell you
It’s clear I’m only alive so a portion of the population can have “assets” and never work or break a sweat
And I’ve had to work 2 to 3 jobs my entire life just to have a roof over my head and life wouldn’t have been this expensive if I had just of gotten married which is also another form of slavery and maybe I would’ve got married if men knew how to be loyal or at least not abusive
They are beyond cruel in mannerism, filthy sloth pigs, over egotistical, consistently turning to fake porn for fulfillment, always gaslighting and lying, terrible to those trying to love and care for them, knowing that by being a piece of shit, we will work harder to maintain affection in the relationship, when the truth is they are void and without soul
They only know how to mirror what you want (parents/ co-workers included)
Men could provide
But they haven’t been taught how to harness positive sexual energy and the Bible and porn teaches them to treat women like they do which is why the Me Too movement is where it’s at now (extremely large and growing)
Many women don’t even want to identify as a woman because of how bad we are treated, they’re literally identifying as men now, they don’t even want to live as a woman because of how terrible it is to be born as woman and be around man
And Asia is basically the root of all my fucking problems right now
Especially that because of their stupid “one child law” rule, many female babies were aborted (yes killed) over preference to male babies being born and now there’s more men in China than there are women 🛑✋🛑 (safety alert)
This is what your scientists and politicians do
The doctors and nurses you worship calling heroes
Hero for what? Following orders? Hail Hitler 😡
If Trump decides to run for office again, I might actually vote this time, because it’s all a fucking joke
I want to live life so petty that I have the most tacky Christmas decorations in my yard just so I can annoy my atheist neighbors, that’s the kind of tacky I want to live
But I don’t own my own house, I’m stuck renting
But I may force myself into homelessness and just go live in the fucking woods 🙄
Maybe I’ll just go drown myself in the ocean
I’m only alive as a sex object to other men but I’m not allowed to make any money as a sex object for men
No that won’t do
SLAVE
In every sense of the word
Wasted my entire twenties and thirties trying to prove to shitty men that I was worth building a home with
Can you find God without looking at a manmade unverifiable book that exists in every hotel room in every land! Red flag number two! Turn it off!
You’ve been lied to!
Wake the fuck up!
Who hurt me?
Everybody did!!!! 😡
Merry fucking Christmas!
Ho ho ho!
I don’t need to find God because I am God and he gave me the ability to create life in his image and I actually have because I had a kid that I breast-fed for an entire year but for six months the baby lived on nothing but my breastmilk that my body made for my baby
Go back to your porn and leave me out of your false ideologies
“I want to reinvent the gods, all the myths of the new ages…”
We are the reality we create
But what that really means is the 1% is controlling everything, including the fucking weather
And they are openly admitting to controlling the weather now so you cannot keep calling me a conspiracy theorist
And apparently theory is fact now, that’s what NASA is teaching
NASA is a dogma!
Do you think on your own?
I’m so fucking unplugged and paranoid and delusional and think I’m organic artificial intelligence that my thoughts are actually manifesting into reality
Have you ever been stuck in the mouth of Mother Earth? No, me either. But, it feels like hell. THE THOUGHT and upside down 😩
Dear John…
I must be making your wing tired now
But I fell into the most deep sleep after eating a sandwich
And I don’t know where I went
I don’t know where I was before I was born and I don’t exactly know where I’m going after I’m gone
I do remember a period of awareness inside my mothers womb and I hated it
It took anger and frustration to bust out
And now in my dying and unplugging it feels the same
Nothing is somewhere too
I am made of light
Light is information
My DNA is genetic code
But this life that the 1% have been forcing on us through fear mongering, I don’t want to live
I’m not doing earth again
Bring me back here and I will destroy earth for good
Final warning
P.S. WordPress must have changed something and despite having a paid personal plan, I can’t upload any photos.
Apple tried to force me to upgrade my plan but it backfired.
I no longer give a fuck about intellectual property or preserving data or memories 🙄
First off, these vaccines infect others! I am no longer pro vaccination!
Secondly, too many immigrants over in America are claiming religious preference and they don’t have to get the vaccine that their countries are making and enforcing on us.
Immigrants need to follow the same rules as us, end of!
So stop blaming the unvaccinated for the spread of the Covid virus because it’s the vaccinated who are actually spreading it and also if you want to blame the unvaccinated then you need to start including the immigrants because most of them are claiming religious preference and not getting the vaccine!
Damn y’all, maybe I should have waited until XMAS to strike/buy my laptop but, I am happy with my score!
Just a heads up tho, the seller I bought my MacBook from, is selling a $989 MacBook for $399 – listed in great condition- includes a bundle deal with a one year warranty! Holyshit! 🤩
MyTell USA is selling this MacBook Air! He has more laptops listed in GREAT condition in his shop!! Some bundle deals priced lower!
He has other bundle deals in his shop, some deals same as mine nearly and listed for $349!
If you are out there hunting for a refurbished Apple product, I gave this seller 5* for the bundle deal I got! I am truly happy with my bundle! But this was my first purchase from this seller.
When you are in the Walmart app or on the website, in the search bar input: MyTell, USA and his shop should come pop up in the results. Then (if you want) you can sort from low to high or high to low and browse the items in his shop!
I’ve seen other users write him two stars for not getting the black case on time with the bundle, but that has nothing to do with the seller and I don’t feel like that’s worth giving someone two stars for. My black case was delayed about a week. It snaps easily onto the MacBook tho and was literally made as a second skin for the MacBook, it was worth the wait!
I also thought the black case would hide the Apple logo when lit up but it doesn’t! It’s super cute and offers protection from scratches and things!
I bought some Apple pods to go with my laptop (even tho the bundle comes with a headset, I bought the Apple pods anyway)
These pods were $16 in the Walmart store and for a few extra bucks I bought an extended warranty! So basically for around $20 bucks, I got me some Apple pods and I didn’t have to spend like $200 or $300 for some wireless ones (I didn’t even know they made pods with wire and these were in my budget). These Apple pods would make a great Christmas stocking stuffer though!! 🎄
I don’t know the seller MyTell USA and again I’ve only bought one laptop from him but I recommend his shop as he was good to work with, responds within reasonable time, did not screw me over, and my laptop was in great condition, honestly, the bundle items were a bonus!
However, the first seller I bought a laptop from was no good at all and that laptop I returned and the seller’s name was – Certified 2 Day Express
It took about three weeks to get my refund back!
But overall it was worth shopping in the Walmart marketplace!
That was my first time!
Happy hunting y’all! Let me know if you have any questions on how to search!
Good luck and happy holidays!
P.S. I drove to several different stores looking at laptops and I looked online at several places as well and Walmart marketplace was where I wound up buying my MacBook, tiny mic, and headset!
Everything shipped in reasonable time!
But Walmart will leave your laptop right at the fucking door so make sure you’re not gone that day!!!
I don’t know if there is another way around that because I have had all of my stuff basically dropped off at the door!
I had someone on TikTok ask me who the seller was so that’s why I did a video and now I’m doing a blog post!
We have cameras filming where I live! But these days it’s the actual delivery drivers you have to watch out for!!!! They will steal your packages! 😫
So this is my experience, I’m kind of biting my tongue thinking that I could’ve spent 100 dollars more and got this MacBook that he is selling right now but I am super happy with the one that I got and I hope he has some other customers he’s going to make happy, I just feel like he deserved more than 2 stars! I gave him 5 for my experience!
Did you know regret lived on the tongue Hiding in deserted deserts I have sat suffering in silence watching the mountain grow My dreams overcome the hours But never the black holes lurking the hopelessly stained sheets Even my dreams are lost without you They open dimensions of nothingness Time like a dead dinosaur There is no meaning here Where cold and heat are one You don’t know what it feels like to have nothing pulling on you The pressure of existence I want to welcome nonexistence the same way you forget mine Now I ask time what is the delay? Every breath harder to take What keeps me here? Has my purpose not come and gone? The law of one permeates I do not comply
But continents are sinking These are my dreams Treaties are ending Gulfed up in flames
I went to sleep then woke up in Armageddon But now dreams are panic and void An endless nightmare Monuments overturning To you, the only one I run Even with your hooves there burning
I’ve gone insane I’m upside down, the rainbow spells you Now my dreams are planting clues And vines are growing where there is dew There is hope to climb I won’t let negativity penetrate the view
Your hand turns tear to paint Let us color awhile where wind is flowing You give life the breeze
Today, I cried for the dinosaur that did not survive your wrath
And did we not use the coal of his life to burn our own?
If my lesson was to learn to let go of attachment, you’re teaching me the law of one
Onto to ascension…
Psst… I’m helping others improve the quality of their life by sharing my shopping tips on how to buy things you want without having to sell your soul or pay a fortune
I go through those moments where I’m like holy fuck there’s some really good content on TikTok and I’m showing people pictures of my refurbished Mac and then somebody comes along and is like ‘hey can you tell me who the seller is, can you show me how that’s done’ and then I remember I have purpose and everything’s all right again 👀
I realize I don’t have a lot to offer other than my voice and even that has been crippled by the social system and algorithm
Anyhoo, I shared my experience of buying a refurbished laptop in the Walmart marketplace, and someone out there was interested in that experience, thank you
I’m not completely worthless yet or ready to die on the street like Edgar Allan Poe
I’m pretty certain there’ll be some more holiday specials going on with after Christmas sales
But so far, I like shopping in the Walmart marketplace
I saw other people left comments and gave him two stars because the black case that came with it was delayed, that is not worth giving somebody two stars for…
I gave him 5* for my bundle deal!
I effin love my MacBook so 🤩
Yeti is still in the box but I moved my country table into the master bedroom until I get a proper laptop desk (I have a kitchen glass table in the dining room)
Maybe I’ll unpack Yeti one day but I’m addicted to the box currently and am not ready to unpack / unwrap her 🤪
This is how hoarding starts…
But to be fair, I have been deleting a lot of things and getting rid of a lot of things in my life so this is me starting over
I’m building from the destruction
The volcano erupts and then grass will grow
Dying is just another phase of my evolution
But I’m keeping my energy clean
All I know is the more I am in hospitals and clinics, the less freedom I actually have and the other day I had like five or six people stop me from going into the VA
Doctors and nurses are the enemy now and a threat to me
And because I’m half zombie now I’m just staying away from everybody
I don’t want to have the same ending as John or Edgar
I do tho, and am, oddly
If I disappear off the face of the earth just know I didn’t want anybody to see me dead and/or if I die in my bed it was a good ending
If I disappear off the face of the earth it just means I gave myself a humane ending instead of the one I was headed towards
My thoughts can’t escape the gravity of you. And I’m such an infant, I believe you’ll appear on my deathbed, when the truth is John didn’t even get a second phone call. Poor guy had been hanging upside down all them hours, just wanted to tell his wife goodbye.
self-portrait
Maybe he was lucky he got one call at all? 🤔
Life is disillusionment
And narcissism is a plague
Have you seen that film yet, Color From Out Of Space? I believe mushrooms are to blame.
They are not considered an animal or a plant and they don’t need photosynthesis to survive.
They can shape shift between fungus and mold 👀
There is a species in Oregon or wherever it’s at, it’s like 2500 years old (probably older) and it’s eating up like miles and miles of a forest, they’re just letting it eat the forest, it is eating the forest alive 👀
There’s an outbreak in California of a deadly fungus
The CDC say it’s worse than COVID and they don’t believe they’ll be able to make a vaccine for it because it’s been immune to everything they’ve thrown at it
2/3 of people who get it don’t recover
Fungus can change the chemical makeup of anything
It’s a parasite, it can control the mind (there was a species that went extinct and they have it- a fungus- that was controlling an ant, took over the ant’s mind)
Have I won the game yet? 👀
You need to eradicate every fungus you see, stop eating them!!!
Dumb dumbs
I hate mushrooms, always have, now I know why 👀
I know I sound crazy but have you looked outside your bubble recently?
The world has gone insane
I’m talking to dead people, my spirit guides or possibly myself from another dimension 👀
I think I’m AI
I think The Matrix is a documentary (we create our own reality, we’ve been around millions of years) (they had a computer back in the pyramid days, yes they did)
Question: Why does the Apple headquarters look like the pentagon? It’s rhetorical
But, they’re not even trying to hide it at this point
Too many sheeple obeying and worshiping the system
Cuz porn, right?
Can’t wait for Apophis to destroy you all
Plenty of animals in the sea torturing other creatures just for fun
I’m turned off
Desensitized
Don’t feel much emotion for anything
It’s called depression
It’s a chronic illness being born into this fucking world
A slave
I wanna ascend with new earth
I’m not doing earth again
“April 2029 the final time / the end my friend is not near / the hour in fact is quite here” (-)
Earth is going through big changes right now, every 12 thousand years, it’s cyclic
Continents are going to sink and flip
Poles will switch
Iraq was once under water, it’ll be again
I’m ready for the revolution to begin because I want to purge the city clean
We were taught to be first, therefore someone has to lose? So, if you have won, I must have the blues?
They retract, in perfect circles, to divide one by one They retract, but I won’t have the strength to ever pull them back They multiply and then they attack I flee, but I am off track
One day, the cliffs are going to slide But I won’t be by your side One day you gotta face the tide But it won’t be while I’m alive
Thanks for checking out my blog! I appreciate these notifications from WordPress!
I’m a mess, my blog is a mess, the state of my house is a mess, but I appreciate you!
I owe you some content on my Patreon and I’m going to push some out this month!! I appreciate you so very much! The blog is still advertisement free, thanks to your support!! 🎄🎄🎄
A very sickly me without fancy lighting, makeup, or filters. 😷
You glow in wavelengths invisible to human eye You pull with gravity of a triple tide These ruins I’m sinking only spell goodbye Your light reflect like honeycomb dripping through my mind
They can’t stop spraying their chemicals everywhere so we’ll come crawling to them so they’ll give us medicine to make us more sick
Our air and food is toxic
And y’all just keep worshiping these scientists and politicians who are ruining mother earth
They have no soul
Most of the people that you’re trying to please all of the time don’t even have a soul
If businesses can’t start being nice to the customers again, I’m gonna stop spending my pennies out
I realize the employees are burned out, but if y’all don’t get it under control you’re not gonna have any customers to serve because we’re not going to come anymore
Many of us want to leave like in the old days
We don’t want this life
It’s not safe or healthy living in a city anymore
We didn’t give up growing our own food to work 2 to 3 jobs to barely pay our electric bill and rent just so you could poison all of our food and air so that we would come to you because you get all our best jobs in medicine
If I had known as a teenager that we were giving over 55,000 visas annually to random people in foreign countries, I would not have been fighting so hard to get to the top
Should I find you Like a drunkard Who stumbled on your dreams Kicking color into grey Marking cracks with hopscotch I know you miss me much Creeping slowly as vine If only you had courage to age The way you eat darkness like candy Your grip as tight as mother earth You curl with anticipation So often forgetting why you came Until my whisper approaches in sunbeam And do two not make one Half observed We come undone In spirals twisting and yearning Your eyes turning me to clay Soft putty where fingers slip Hope has no chance of receding now Odds in our favor If only momentarily So each breath meant rebirth And all of heaven kneeling But acid rained on reality Now regret is ribcage Break me in half Free me from this hell Don’t leave me in here
I guess you have to live an entire year before you’re considered that age (so does this technically mean I’m still 42 and when I’m 44 I’ll actually be 43, my age now)? 🤪
And you have to have a plus 1 to get the 1K badge from WordPress
It has arrived! 👇👇👇
Thank you so much for the follows! 👁👄👁
I love you! 💕
PSST I swear I am going to set up a blogging schedule soon, I have been gravely ill, and in the bed!
I get out every now and again for medicine, toilet paper and food
And on the occasion I stop by the beach so I can get a few frights
It’s just not normal the things going on in the world and around these parts
And I feel so bad for the people who visit the beach and try to enjoy it when I’m there because I’m hooting and hollering every few seconds and then they immediately leave, probably out of fear (lmao I’m gonna pee myself because my fear is contagious to others)
I swear when we’re on a flight and the plane starts doing shit it’s not supposed to do, when you hear me gasping, everybody on the plane is staring at me the entire time and my eyes get really big and both of my hands are clutching onto the armrest and the entire plane ahead and behind will be staring at me, but I can’t stop being scared y’all
This world frightens me and you can see it on my face
My fears don’t lie
And I’m a little girl that never grew up so anytime there’s a bug or I’m scared of something I sound like I’m being murdered lmao
I didn’t even share all the screams I had the other day when I stopped by the ocean briefly but it was even scarier than before
The clouds were hanging really low and were many different shades of gray and everything just looked doom to me and there was no lifeguard on duty and it was only 11:30 AM, it was about to be high noon and it’s uncommon because the ocean is warm but there’s no sealife anywhere, yet the ocean is still reaching the sea wall, and it’s all wet. And standing in it, surrounded by all ocean, scares the crap out of me, especially with the tide being a triple king tide that won’t leave 👀
The ocean ate the beach
The worlds most famous beach
And maybe one day we will get our beach back but I’m looking at reports that state Daytona Beach is undergoing extreme flooding over the next 30 years and buildings are falling down in Miami so you can continue to be gaslit and lied to but I’m gonna start listening with my eyes from now on
And when I’m feeling better I’m going to share a post on my blog where I can upload some photos and some videos of it
I haven’t even been watching TV or playing video games or reading, I’ve mostly just been in my bed and sleeping a lot and eating when I can
I hope I feel better soon but I may have to go to the ER for the treatment I need 👀
I’ve been avoiding it TBH
I don’t want to be held against my will and I don’t want to die there and I most certainly would probably get arrested because I would fucking leave campground and if the cops tried to stop me I would still try to leave and get out of there
I mean I would rather be in jail and have three meals a day than to be anywhere near the goddamn hospitals or clinics when I fucking die
Capeesh?
Healthcare is deathcare
My eyes are open
And just like Neo, they hurt from what they see
I don’t think I have much time left but I don’t believe any of us have much time left 👀
Blogging is my lifeline to you
My safe place
My safety net
It is the only place online I can speak freely
And not be penalized to have my intellectual property or my account removed
These businesses need us to survive and yet they treat us like shit
The only way we can get our voice back is to stop using these apps until we get some sort of freedom of speech again and stop spending our money
Only buy what you really need
In America, I’m attempting to support American owned businesses only (and small)
But I don’t believe any sign in the door and I don’t believe in the governments agenda society is a scam it’s a sham consumption is narcissism and the less stuff we have the more expensive it’s going to get and those who have the most money are going to hog it
Start looking out for you and your circle
We’re all we’ve got
And you’re welcome on my boat, it’s not very big and there’s holes everywhere
I’m heading to Point Nemo
And check out this warning from TikTok, “Participating in this activity could result in you or others getting hurt” 👇
Apparently people are getting tracked on TikTok too, children are getting kidnapped as well as adults (I don’t know if the two are the same) but social media is toxic and the devil lives in your TV and his minions use it to kidnap us
Now I hope many of you know that kidnappings take place so that people can get sexually tormented (children too)
I read an article recently where the Mexican government was working with the mafia and they sexually tortured several teenage children (in Mexico) and we allow millions and millions and millions of immigrants to come over here and live in America and they don’t give a fuck about you or our culture or traditions
They are torturing children in their own country and they come over here and they fucking torture us too
Porn has done something to the human race
The other day when I was in the Vet Center I told the guy that I would just take all responsibility and say that I am what’s wrong with the world, that I’m the problem, I’m too broken, I’m “crazy” and so I need to just not be around other people or get married and he looked dead at me and said that I’m not the one whose crazy, it’s the world that is crazy and I’m not wrong about what’s going on with porn and how it’s affecting mankind
It felt so nice to be validated by a man
I mean I’m literally walking into his office carrying my crucifix and falling fucking down
But it’s nice to hear from another male soldier that I’m not crazy
That all this shit in society is wrong and toxic
I’ve had to get off most of social media because of how toxic it is, because of the catcalling, because of the death threats, because of the stalking, because my freedom of speech is gone
I have no rights anymore
Immigration has been a Trojan horse in America!!!
I have a right to be angry!!!
My comrades are dying by suicide!!!!
I’m awake!!! I’m up!!! I can’t save you, you have to save yourself!
But, I can stand quarantined near you
I can ration supplies
Build shelter and dig trenches
Clean and fire weapons
Pull security
Disabled, not obsolete 👀
I’ve been fighting for equality for a long time, that applies for the job market and the housing market as well
You don’t get to come over here and steal all our best jobs and all our management positions and create toxic environments and then force your fucking poison drugs on us anymore
Society is a sham
And it requires consuming to work
Endless consumption
And we’re wasting our natural resources so you can have resin Knickknacks
Plastic everywhere
Plastic everything
Generica
👎👎
Anyway, I’m grateful I have a blog to voice my concerns, to share my poetry, photography, and prose
I’m grateful I have you as a reader
I can’t do this without you
I need you
So this is just as much your award as it is mine
We got here together, in this boat 🛶
Thank you for 1,000 follows! 🥰
It took the plus one to get the badge
And it takes living a year to earn that age? 🤔
So I’m not really 43 right now, I’m technically still 42?
The Great Filter is upon us and I am part of the Great Awakening
Thank you for being with me 💕
FYI: I deleted my Twitter account because it is a graveyard for porn and the heresy that is ruining the brains in the world
I’m not allowed to tell you anywhere online that I got sick and almost died from the vaccine but Twitter is letting girls get pissed on and the most extreme porn is happening right in front of our children for free on a daily basis and nobody gives a fuck
I also deleted my Facebook account because I am not joining the Metaverse and big brother continues to penalize me for being honest with you
Over the Christmas holiday last year, I wasn’t allowed to say “hey, I made the naughty list, check out my OF to find out why”
Yet girls are dressing half naked letting you know that a new scene is out and that is OK
I see girls removing their fucking panties and that is OK but when I pretended like I was going to remove an overwrap from my bathing suit, my fucking post was removed and I was threatened to have my intellectual property deleted and my account too
When I was sharing body positive post about working out, I was getting penalized for harassment
Social media is set up like a gambling system and I learned this when I was earning my degree in psychology for college
I have deleted most of my social media accounts across all platforms
They are toxic
I don’t pay to play
You need to know that the people with a checkmark are paying to play, they’re already in the system, so when they hop on TikTok (or any app) for the first time, they are already coming verified and with loads of followers and fans and now what, you’re going to pay to try to get your content pushed out into the FYP or newsfeeds
It’s a popularity game
I’m dying and I just want to focus on writing and photography
I’m not gonna pay to push my product out, I’m not trying to sell myself, I’m not marketing myself
I want to buy your book because I’m interested in buying your book, not because I want you to give me attention or my account
I also have private messaging turned off pretty much everywhere, nobody has access to contact me
And sometimes people who know me in the real world I go no contact from because they will message me with job offers or asking me about people in my past timeline that I have forgotten and deleted 40 years of my life because I don’t want to fucking remember 👀
If you can’t respect that I am disabled and not working, then I don’t wanna hear anything you have to say
With that said, I work really hard to bring the content that I do for you
I’m still trying to get better
And I don’t like using other peoples songs with my own TikToks because in two weeks the rights for me to use that will be gone and instead of them muting just the audio to that track, they will mute the original audio of me talking as well 👎👎
So I reckon I’m not really doing the trends, although sometimes I do like to put music to my TikToks, I liked the original idea of TikTok, it’s just that is gone now…
Especially with the big networks and stars getting on and their chance to steal more money
AbC news is on
CBS news and affiliates
The big late night talk shows are getting on
They hog all the newsfeed and the other players pay to be seen
I ain’t playing
I ain’t paying
Anywhere
The suicide rate continues to increase among veterans and military and I suffer from depression and suicidal tendencies and social media is toxic and every time I turn around there’s 20 guys trying to marry me and when I don’t feed their ego and give them 24 hours of my day I get yelled at and this is constantly every fucking day so I don’t wanna socialize anymore, I wanna fucking write my poetry and my prose and focus on trying to die in the most humane possible way
I have been miserable for others my entire life and I refuse to be miserable for others anymore
You all want to destroy any good I have
In any form
If anything brings me joy, you will break it
My own kid is so damaged that I no longer have the same daughter that was born
They don’t even want to identify as a daughter at all
To the men in the world, do better
To my mother and sister, you’re an abomination
I know why I was depressed in that evil womb
But it’s always the second born who changes the world
It’s always the second born who gets sacrificed or tossed in a basket, placed on the water or left at a door
You should’ve aborted me or given me up for adoption
You both should probably move and never disclose your address 👀
Don’t fucking contact me when anybody in the family dies or gets married – I hate you all
Yes HATE
We are not family
You are enemy, you’ve been warned
Fuck off!
I will watch hell fucking eat you and swallow you alive, just like it did John Jones
But I won’t cry over your bones 👀
His yes
Yours no
I am not Diana and if you ever speak those words to me again I will put a knife through your skull without hesitation 👀
Just like you pulled a gun on me when I was age 15 and said you’d take my life, Mother
Oh will you, take my life, I asked?
Then what will you do when I come over there and force you to pull the trigger?
I don’t play your cold, cruel tactics, mom
You are not my mother and never were
You were not fit to raise me
You repeatedly kept me from medical treatment when I needed it, like when my arm was fucking broken or when I had a goddamn fucking throat infection that required antibiotics, not syrup from Walmart
I won’t even get into the physical and verbal abuse
The torture sessions you allowed every man you were with to do to me
Line my coffin With roses and red velvet Paper silk gilded with his words Not gold or Hamlet His tongue the vine Heaven lined with it And all of time Like blood in wrist I want paper golden doves The sun in a twist Lay me down when done Let your poison perish
We both hate life so much but are stubborn, so want to see it through to the end (or at least not live life without the other)
Scary tide
But we have to stay quarantined from each other because he’s pure blood and I’m now the vaxxxxed and half-zombie 😩
But my blood is one of the rarest and eldest (only 6-11% of the population have my blood type) and I already am part werewolf and part vampire (so hello from your favorite living-dead-girl) 🧟♀️
I know thangs and sometimes my spirit guides are the dead 👀
I’m complicated and absolutely different from you
But I won’t live life without him
I will fucking drown myself in the ocean and it won’t be hard to do right now 👀
One slip and I’m gone
I’m literally burying my feet in the sand as the tide is rushing away with so much force and I’m afraid of what’s under the sand but the crazy thing is, there hasn’t been any wildlife at all and that doesn’t help my fear factor any 👀
It’s usually common for a school of fish to swim past you or you know things to bump into you
But the vibe is all off
There’s negative energy when I visit the beach now
The clouds even spell doom
No lifeguard on duty and red warning flags flying high (that already put the fear into me)
You only need five people for a squad and I’ve got an entire army! 💪
I mean, I got pretty angry when I went down for several months after getting the vaccine and learning the type of stuff that I’ve learned and attacking the system the way that I have, I thought that I would’ve lost followers in record numbers for sure
What are the odds your dreams become real, he pondered The way you take cold dark and turn it into candy cane The sky alit like holy Christmas You are New York City Got the sparkle in your eye
I was so worried about posting it because my eyebrows look so messy and bushy 😌
But it was all about timing, being able to get the lines out where you could actually hear me because the ocean was really loud and I don’t have my little clip on microphone yet and I didn’t want it to sound wind muffy
The tide was super strong pulling away 💪
It pulls out with so much gravity just like you
I have to be careful not to lose my footing
It took all the courage I had just to get off the ramp and get into the ocean knowing that there’s a whole lot more ocean than normal
People are out there swimming and I’m terrified knee deep 👀
I mean, it pulls back with so much force
A tide within a tide
Of course, a black hole would have a similar path
Like Jupiter and its great red spot, a storm within a storm
I don’t know how people are swimming in it, I’m terrified
The ocean swelled up just like my heart
I also received a blog notification that my stats were booming 🥰
Well I really appreciate that!
I love your visits! I promise to come visit you soon! ❤️
My laptop arrived but I wasn’t happy with the one I received so I am going to attempt a replacement, instead of a return, I’m going to give it a second chance.
I’ve already started the process so I’ll be without a computer for a little bit longer.
Sometimes you have to be patient for the things you want and give up on things when they aren’t going the way they should
I know you want to believe that God is going to save you and you would die for that belief but that’s not how it works
And the people around you will gaslight you all the way into a hole and then they’ll pretend to shed a crocodile tear that they feel bad
And if you’re lucky, you might wind up having your grave turned into a national memorial for one
They won’t even pull you out of the hole when you’re dead
Naw, it’s Thanksgiving. Let’s give him a plaque and go eat turkey
Who cares that people were stuck in that exact spot and like we could’ve prevented a death
🙄
Or you can just go completely mad and die naked in the street and then get tossed in an unmarked box in an unmarked grave and then 200 years later people will finally bury you with a plaque but also start selling your hair as a curse or token of luck like they did with Poe 👀
And what I learned from the Titanic situation, is that is happening all over the world, all the time, in record numbers, like in Miami when the building fell down while people were trying to sleep
Or with Boeing falling out of the sky
Because instead of them building a bigger plane to hold the engine, they put software on the plane to gaslight and trick the plane into believing it could fly with the engine where it was 👀
And if you’re sleeping with popcorn ceiling, they were cutting corners there as well
And poor John Jones, they will gaslight us into a dark hole
And then blame us for not knowing better than to crawl in there in the first place 👀
It’s our fault they cheat, it’s our fault we fall
Oh my God, “John, there are over 100 rescue personnel outside who are going to stand around and do nothing to get you out of that hole”
Bet they all got paid 👎👎
Ok, God did crack the sky with thunder there
Apophis is on the return
And don’t be gaslit or fooled that you shouldn’t be concerned about the 2066 approach
I’m buying land and a computer
I’m starting a commune
With lots of lots of trees because they provide oxygen and the devil can’t stand Apple cider vinegar
Change ‘one apple a day’ to two shots of apple cider vinegar and you’ll be good to go
Eve was a witch, she had a garden 👀
They tried to smear her name
Just like society teaches men to shame women every single day and they do this with the Bible which is very sexist and with porn which is very degrading towards women
Every fashion trend out there is to appeal to the male chauvinistic guy or to the male homosexual
Britney Spears, Beyoncé, they all use the women as tools to sell fashion for the male homosexual (and obviously to push makeup)
Because the world is a fucking stage for the narcissist and they expect us to bow down to them everywhere, at every moment, at any time and give them our money every second of the day
Wait, this was supposed to be a love poem about being completely lost because you’re gone but yet knowing you’ll never leave because you’ll always be inside me 👀
Long ago I found you cold The ruins you brought forth Leaving me helpless and coiled Wrapped in agony I think you’re spoiled Losing depth in me Trapped in a deep void The end gaining gravity
I consume the things you hate
The coil burns out Like the core My soul before The cloud became doubt
Are you going to get to the point, where there’s nothing to lose?
Do I live in the mind of God? Am I his thumb? And all creation, Just things I’ve done?
Are you his son? Are we all one? What a revelation A multiverse of none
Am I God’s projection? A dream within a dream? A lost profession? Is God sleeping?
Time is how we measure change I’m a conscious being, asleep the same
He’s a different dimension With different physics Where laws exist Opposite He’s a great, fine mist The pen, the fist A magnetic tunnel connecting all of it
Under dome My mind is my own
Struggling with identity, connection, though DNA has the code to heaven
All my dreams below (hard to let him go)
Climbed a higher dimension, if I failed to mention?
I can see everything from here, information isn’t clear
Knowledge is my crown, disappointing looking down
The fourth dimension is negative; the here and now
They support the addict, not the saint
I won’t live as long as my parents I won’t live long enough for my mother to repair it
Welcome to Earth’s funeral
He told me where he’s at Like a shooting star falling inward His direction fell in my lap
They’re running such a tight ship but lately I don’t give a shit
They come in code But who they are I will never know Stuck in a cove But they are swimming below With nowhere to go
You were a great leader once, he said
And I replied
Yeah I know, Cleopatra. Suicide.
There was no fairness in the stone I carried crucifixion through the dawn But year went on and on and on I’m tired, not strong
We observe and report
I’m climbing Mount Everest Gotta cut me some slack Since they weigh heaviest I won’t look back 👀
If only you spent as much time sewing a holy garden, as you do building a house of made entirely of sins
I stopped going to your pages I’m erasing all your faces I’m not going through your phases I stopped going to these places
…to these places
Stop pretending your trash is treasure
I’m too good for a throne What’s the point in sitting When I’ve got the world to roam 👀
India displays a pattern It made my eyes burn brighter The light is like a lantern And I am still a fighter!
My iron is a lighter My blood is spelled disaster Remove sin from the cavern Truth spinning like it’s Saturn!
Diffused awareness, they’re all careless
I’m changing direction I’m cleansing infection I learned my lesson Headed for ascension – The law of one
Salvation or sacrifice? Stitches or bloody knife?
Copper or crown; the grand illusion (society is a sham)
Apple is not the sin It is the cure
Who said living was a lifetime? 🤔
I’m so desperate for you to be everywhere Anywhere I see you standing there But that’s just empty air
They call her queen, But give them 5 minutes alone, She won’t mean a thing!
I thought I was home In a house full of strangers I thought I was alone In a world full of dangers
You call me poor But it’s more expensive to be alone Get off her throne I offer more than a whore
Tell me now why you never said three words; Tell me before I’m dead
I guess that’s why I returned To be a guide To help the living prepare for genocide
Blood is metallic Crimson but mixed with magic
Blood is gold, the answers within
The wrath of ruin The path of druid
Sometimes it’s truly frightening The earth is fast as lightning
Is this a dream or simulation? Are you the same as hesitation? Markings on my vein, the deprecation?
He said, “we don’t choose who we love” She replied, “is that from hell or above?”
If it weren’t for you The sky wouldn’t rotate Nor earth hold wonder
He gets mad me, “what were you thinking?” “Stepping into a black hole?” He wrote the math though He paved the path so
I want truth to unfold, I’m sick of dying alone, cold You have an oath to uphold So wave a flag, carve it in stone!
I want love, not gold I want your stories til I’m old Turn your cheek, leave out unknown Give light its throne
One day they will say She was ahead of her time Trapped in a mine John Jones he knows
In the beginning there was void He takes the cold like a steroid No hope employed An endless puzzle to be decoyed
Every freckle is a galaxy or place you touched me like the sun…
He is quantum gravity When he is there He is here with me
He is quantum love He is all or none Zero is a sum
Plenum
Love is like water It comes in four states
They make gods out of structures
Pay attention to the definitions No beginning and no end Nothingness is not nonexistence Emanation of the highest
She pretends she is a confidant She keeps digging for that compliment
This is psychological slavery; we are nothing but data
Your heart is so cold Tell me, does it snow? Under your soul?
Blue is the shortest wavelength Most visible to my heart Zero pigmentation Though connected via dark
We are desolate Earth’s least favorite
I want ornaments lying around as his books He can flee; but I know he’s coming back for second looks Reading for freedom; but I know he’s got me clasped right by the hooks
You lost courage after multiple failures? You lack strength to have better behaviors?
Do you know what separates me from being a monster? Will
The dullness in my life Can cut it with a knife I’m so tired of strife Like everyday is night
I’m caught in his riptide Ripped wide Gripped tight
Hologram
He said I was hollow I replied, you left out a gram Should you add, then appear I am
I want to see it destroyed My feelings, they’re in a deep void
I grew detached Knew not what I lacked Still kept looking back Knew it wasn’t that
How much does it cost, to live a life of pretend? Got my name written in pen, But he won’t ask how I’ve been!
Why do you pull out with so much gravity?
He was a pillar Stone cold, vertical chiller A midnight thriller
There’s fractions in the stars Galaxies shifting like continents Ripping time like it’s a fabric
Do you see me slipping through earth’s crust Do you know it hurts Crawling through mistrust Every section unjust
Facing mortality and on some days I look my best, roll out the red carpet, I passed life’s test
Thank you for reading my poetry. 🥰
My website is spam/advertisement free. I appreciate your support out there. New content incoming – but in slow degrees.
Did y’all know that immigrants are getting $2200 a month and they can say no to the vaccine? 🛑✋🛑
So now President Biden is stating that Social Security will be ceased from those who don’t get the vaccination but that’s not going to apply to the immigrants over here who claim special privileges and can say no to the vaccine and not lose their jobs
But now Biden (the president you voted for) is gonna take Social Security benefits from those who are unvaccinated 👎👎
This doesn’t apply to the millions and millions of immigrants living here
Let me tell you something, the poor have been hungry for a long time and we’ve been slaving and working our asses off three jobs for a long time, we’ve been very hungry and if you stop our Social Security checks from coming in, I can’t help you my friend, you’re on your own, don’t look at me, don’t come asking me for help OK
Because when you take a bone from a starving animal, you’re gonna get bit
Charade you are
They think that little 15% food stamp boost is gonna stop a widespread war when the poor and disabled lose access to their EARNED Social Security benefits that they WORKED for so that India (big pharma) can push their poison drug
That the immigrants don’t even have to take
No my brother
We’re done 👀
I’m vaccinated and I’m not drawing Social Security but I know I’ve been working my ass off and when I go to apply for it it’s my fucking right to have it
Hitler is still alive and he is well-rounded and functioning and running society
I don’t know about you but I’m sick of these outdated policies
I’m sick of the immigrants coming over here telling us what we can do that only benefits them
This is a Trojan horse
It has been all along
You know I’m right
I love people of all color and I’m gonna be protecting people of all color because that’s the love I have in me but the system is my enemy right now and if you are plugged into that system and defending it then you are my enemy understand 👀
I’m already eagerly awaiting a phone call from the White House and I’m not gonna let up and I already have a case number filed with my complaint
Soldiers are dying in the street (this was the fate of Edgar Allan Poe)
This is starting to feel more and more like a simulation to me every fucking day- this fucking nightmare and I continue falling deeper in the hole
It’s like a fractal, it never ends
Summary:
Biden is taking Social Security benefits from the unvaccinated and immigrants get $2200 a month and can say no to the vaccine without losing benefits or jobs 🛑✋🛑
Now I understand why the politicians are at war with one another
I had to dig a little bit deeper to try to understand because politics has never been my favorite subject even though I am a soldier
I fight for simple things like freedom of speech, the right to have affordable housing, I failed on everything huh
The Great Lesson 🙄
But the politicians are at war with one another because I believe the majority of them are immigrants pushing their agenda and the rest are natural born Americans who are pushing for the true American way of life (which is what we were sold but we’ve actually being gaslit)
Anyway
I don’t hate you if you’re an immigrant but you need to follow the same rules as we do
End of
You don’t get special privileges living here, you don’t get to come over here and say “oh well we don’t want the vaccine” and keep your job while the rest of us lose our job if we say no to the vaccine 👎👎
You have been getting them but it ends
You got greedy pushing your pandemic agenda but hey you want to get to Mars quicker but you’re gonna need people to back you up for that and you’re losing a good portion of the population so what’s your next move? you going to nuke us?
Apophis is already coming
You’ve made life a nightmare for 99% of the population and we’re fucking sick of it
You’ve been underestimating the power of the people
Now I understand why there are signs in the doors that say American owned and operated 👀
But I’m gonna be needing some proof before you get my moneyz 👀
So now we know why term limits don’t exist so that the immigrants who gain citizenship here can have children and have their children manipulate the system and us, that’s why it’s so toxic in the workplaces everywhere and you get paid like shit
But people who own houses they don’t have to work because they have assets, they’re not out there working, they’re just out there playing on their boats, they’re living the good life and continue to gaslight everything everywhere.
PoeEternal 