I’m not renewing my card stash but I might cuz I found sungrown in the ground with the sun and trademarked! They tell you where the strain comes from! Florida or Amsterdam etc – there is waayyy less packaging and they treat their shop like a medicinal shop instead of recreational. Did I mention they grow stuff in the ground with the sun?
Makes a difference and it works! I still want to quit and my card expires on 4/19, right as all the good deals are coming in.
I don’t have to worry about fentanyl laced products and this is legal and no I won’t share or buy you any (get yer own card$)
Not Delta 8
I still want to quit but this is the stuff that works
Also not seen – vape pens & 2 free pre-rolls I scored
Today I turned on the radio and got lost in 90s alternative and metal doom
I was like THIS IS THE SHIT
I AIN’T DYING LIKE BOB
I haven’t used up my allotment yet and still have 2 days of potential relapse shopping to do
There went the rent money honey
(I scored it ridiculously cheap and am having a panic that I won’t be able to top up without my card)
(I’ll be racing to the doctor, help, hurry, my card expired)
(So I was trying to avoid that scenario by spending my savings)
I hate me but a little less today because the weed is working
I don’t think I’ve ever had this much weed in one sitting before but alas it’s the apocalypse and I’m trying to quit an addiction
I’m feeling less homicidal off the Curaleaf Russian cloned “the state won’t let us grow it in the ground” junk
Only 2 in that stack isn’t “sungrown” and the fact that they had to “TM” their products
Stay away from Curaleaf
I found “sungrown” at GrowHealthy but I don’t know who owns it
But I like that they have LOCAL herbs – grown right here in the “sunshine state”
I picked up another “mystery plant” today – making this number 4
He’s in the mini tin in the windowsill and already had some delicious spring water
I have 4 pots to put them in once they mature but I have no idea how to move them – and still – with directions – couldn’t make the “paper pot”
Also scored more seeds for my land – once owned. These are non GMO, USA seeds. Added some spicy peppers to my collection!
Him: what sort of things do you need?
Me: a goT damn garden
Sungrown
*sigh*
The other store was selling “head space” at a luxury price and all hydroponic crap (which made me want to gut Bob and I was like “but whyyyyyy”)
Today I enjoyed music again (with the help of “sungrown” TM)
I’m hoping I turn my apartment into a food jungle but why am I afraid of plants and all of this?
Like putting a seed into dirt, sun, spring water and watching it turn into food that will nourish me
Like woah
That’s more than my mother did
Anyhoo
Bath time and cannoli’s
I needed something to regret wasting my money on other than weed
Like why were you walking around there at 2:30 at night?
Sources claim you moved via the crime (you helped create) – but yet returned for work – yet was trolling the streets – assumingely – without a weapon – and was stabbed twice with a kitchen knife – and all you can think to do is cling to your Android – you helped create – and chase after cars – instead of sitting down – stopping the bleeding – at least not putting MORE strain on your heart – but no – you just had to keep getting up and walking around
Like bro
You didn’t call your fam?
If John Jones could squirm in his grave, he would.
Clutching that AI device like it was God
Called the cops – didn’t say where you were or keep the on?
Just hmmm where is everybody at bleeding out?
Let me guess, it went like this
“Hi, I’m Bob, the Cash App founder, I’ve been stabbed. I’m bleeding.” *lifts shirt*
And so the cars drive off
It’s a typical after midnight don’t get involved in scenario – you must have missed the memo?
It’s literally the worse-case-scenario and you walked right in – despite knowing how dangerous California is – which is why you moved to Florida – so you could finish turning it to shit
I know you are “in the closet gay” – I have seen these types of relationships in the military – and billionaires don’t fuck fat wives (maybe out of obligation)
Looking at family photos – zero chemistry – but maybe I’m a kunt
I didn’t stab you with a kitchen knife – twice mind you – at 2:30 am
You didn’t even fight back dressed in fashionable apocalyptic wear?
You had the best and most expensive device – cops still took a slow 6 minutes arriving – despite TWO cops in the area
Bro – I’m researching who I’ve been buying my state weed from – turns out it’s the Russians – surprise!
Anything to quit this nightmare
I knew Cash App and PayPal was going down – like bro – I deleted my accounts – not long ago – and now you’re dead
I saw the red flags
America is under siege and you were bleeding out and going into shock – you might still be here – if you had sat down –
This goes without saying but women no longer can walk in broad daylight without being in danger
“It’s a man’s world” and look what you turned it into
I would have drove away too
My first thought, “safety first” and those circumstances do not scream safe – maybe you would have had more of a chance of getting said help – if you were a nobody
If it was a hit job – which would be an instant thought of “cash” “stabbed” – who would want to get involved and become a victim too? It’s the one thing our Boomer parents warned us about. “Don’t go wandering the streets after sundown”. It was our one curfew. “Be home before dark” and even then we crossed the lines. “Boy you were cutting it close” / “there’s still some pink in the sky”
The Mayor or whoever of Cali is edging us on, “you’ll be surprised” she says “at the details”
Somewhere between Bob dying, another someone got beat with a bat, and the FED launched their version of a Cash App
And Big Cannabis is Big Russia who is changing and gutting our policies
I’m ready to get rid of my phone all together
I mean, Bob helped create Android and Apple share videos on how your phone can save your life – but maybe people need classes on how and when to use it – in an emergency – because Bob was a poster board of all the things Not-To-Do
Bob separated from his wife to move in with his father – how gay (no judgement)
A billionaire living at home with daddy
Not impressed
I watched God push you down
You just kept going
Even dying, wouldn’t drop your phone
“In AI we trust”
God gave me eyes to see but not a mouth of silk
“I got a mouth of filth”
I’d really like some milk
So another Gen X white male is gone
We’re not allowed to have anything
Yeah you got that nice big house in misery (potentially) but you also got gutted in taxes and I would’ve hung myself with 10 foot rope (which means it was probably a failed suicide where I broke some bones instead)
Wait. What.
(I’m talking to a GenX who may or may not be a genx and is mostly a ghost in my head)
Your dad claims you were his best friend, but he didn’t teach you not to walk the streets at night!?! Unarmed!?!
You could afford to hire a bodyguard?
Have a gun?
Unless the killer wasn’t some random bum or hitman – but instead someone close – who could stab you in the left side of your chest – with a kitchen knife
Was it the same one from dinner?
I’ve been reading how lots of murders happen when people are dining or in the shower – by “loved ones”
Also – in bed – sleeping
Vindictive
Remorseless
No soul
Which makes therapy and treatment useless – for those who can’t change – and should be shot like a bear
And I’m tired of bear getting shot over you
Bear angry
Bear justified
I don’t believe in cultural diversification
I guess Bob didn’t get the memo
Here’s the thing, it will be so easy to take out the civilians we swore to protect – in the end – weaklings – but the enemy is using them against us
That couple got gutted in the street last year
And now poor Bob, with a kitchen knife, in Cali
Ironic he thought Florida was any safer
But then moved out of Cali for it being unsafe – but goes back for a business trip – to wander around the streets after dark –
Elon probably does have security when/if he leaves his Pedo farm
Elon pointed out something in his tweet tho – per chance hinting it was a criminal – someone with a prior arrest sheet – who offed Bob
So you had that phone the whole time and the cops were the only one you called? While dying? Clinging to your phone?
And John didn’t get a second phone call on Thanksgiving
Which was his dying wish
I wouldn’t take my dog out at 2:30 am on the 4th cuz I said “some shit is going down”, “I can feel it in the air”
I guess what I meant was the ether…
“He was my best friend”
My mom said the same thing about my sister, who recently died age 45
Strange, these Boomers are losing their first borns – almost biblical
(Was Bob a first born?)
Diversification is very very bad
Especially when it means other races are being wiped out
Hi. I’m part of the 244.
Anger is a legit mood when someone dies.
It’s part of the 7 stages of grief – interchangeably
I can stay angry for the rest of my life
“Take me from all this death”
She was chasing the Singularity
“I love you too much, to condemn you”
Wiki has already been updated and you’re not cold in your grave
New carpet arrived. It’s almost like moving but not.
I’ve learned to hate eating out
They reduce the size but charge you more
A tiny cup of ice for $3.99
A kid size
Two sips, gone
Cup o’ ice please for $4.50
I won’t be back
I yelled at the “boss” of the medicinal shop: “I’m quitting” and complained about the overuse of plastic and paper and waste. He replied “the government” and I yelled “I don’t give a fuck about the government”
I care about the rain forest and weed becoming the new plastic problem
Big Pharma and Big weed love to ruin our environment. Enough is enough!!! I will fight this addiction harder!!!!!!! I will not vote to legalize recreational and regret voting for medicinal. I will never vote again (my therapist says I’m polarized)
I tried to fire her but she wouldn’t go
I was like, I’m trying to quit weed
The state gave me an addiction with malicious intent and purpose
She said, “I’m in it for the long haul”
But what part of “I’m ready to jump from a bridge” or “escape society and disappear forever” is hard to understand?
I fucking talk to the Sun
I still want to look at it tho I’m not supposed to
“Not far enough down yet” (midday wearing prescribed tints mind you)
Then I researched why I need to get a look
And learned Galileo nearly went blind taking a peek at the sun with a telescope and no filter – he never quite recovered
In hindsight it’s like duh but otherwise I get it, I do dumb shit like that
I’ve always wanted to look through a telescope but I’m an invasive frog eating stage 2 food for 17 years, until I get stuck in my environment. I would have looked at the sun too, no filter, gone blindish.
But why do I want to stare at it? Just let me have a look!!!!
I’ve never seen the moon through a telescope
I’m never speaking to another man again
You stole my life
My fitness/stretching room
I’m having nightmares about the dog going on the floor.
He’s on house arrest and not allowed anywhere – but enjoys his walks more and time on my bed instead of his crib – which isn’t bad.
It’s either follow the rules or the death warrant is being signed – I mean the “dying on a good day”.
He wants to live to 12. He’s trying.
But he ain’t allowed anywhere. I’m having fucking nightmares. Just need a clean space. I even cleaned the trim and walls (easier than painting).
My cheap curtains from Aldi are hanging up with tape until I get proper hardware
Sometimes I want to move into my fitness room. And the living room is barren. I donated/trashed/sold everything (95%).
4 pack of nightlights on clearance was cheaper than 1 tiny candle – and it also has improved my mental health.
Who knew it took the dog not pissing on the carpet
Not to mention, the carpet was old and outdated and not like the showroom unit. I fought so hard to get the carpet replaced!
I start group therapy soon and my therapist is censoring what I’m allowed to talk about “in group” FYI.
So, the one person who was participating in group therapy will now attend but not really participate, FYI.
I’m trying to get in a mental and physical state where I can work from home – and luckily programs exist for me to attempt this.
At the state and federal level for veterans.
I don’t have a desktop computer, my phone is broken and there’s not enough space to update and it’s too hard to delete photos in a main album and I don’t want 5g and despite buying and spending hundreds of dollars on both a new phone and refurbished MacBook Air – the phone and laptop are no longer compatible and I’m not dropping thousands of dollars every 2 years to upgrade my devices. I’m done!!!
WordPress is dead and the only reason it has active users or X amount of the network is because universities and students now use it and businesses. They don’t need us.
The charts do show WP declining
They basically acted like Instagram and Twitter and sold-out and the users who made it what it was were punished
We said we didn’t like the Block editor, it was forced on us anyway! Surprise!
I don’t want to jump from platform to platform.
I was humiliated at the previous carpet – and though I wouldn’t let God eat from my kitchen, he could walk on my floor now. And sleep (like me).
I’d rather not have carpet at all – but new modern clean carpet has improved my mental health – despite the nightmares.
I also dropped $15 for a cotton mop and I hope it doesn’t break when I give it some “elbow grease”. Apparently people just push dirt around…
Walmart has become too expensive to shop from and hopefully the handle doesn’t give me cancer – everything else sold there has a cancer warning
The candles there are poison
Like the food and exercise equipment
My Jeep is having problems again and I gotta tell my girl goodbye
I think the mechanics are fucking with her though – with malicious intent and purpose
Having a car is too expensive these days – thought I could enjoy one after spending 6 years paying her off. Apparently not. These monsters are obsessed with the latest model and will force you into slavery of every kind.
My fucking small clothes are baggy on me.
I like having the windows open and the light shining through
I kept all 3 mirrors and opted to put the 2 in my fitness room
They have wire to hang – but alas on the floor they remain
I spent thousands of dollars on beds over the years – never really enjoyed one more than 2 months. Surprisingly, my spine likes the clean floor.
This carpet is a lighter color too, and my lease was renewed.
The neighbors hate me more now (updated carpet).
I’m making 2 ingredient cookies soon. My first time. Of course, I’ll add flax and oats and loads of other ingredients (but sugar, no sugar) so they will be more than “2 ingredients” in the end.
But peanut butter and eggs are all you need (to make “sugar free”)
I’m adding unsweetened coconut flakes, oats, flax, white chocolate, peanuts, and probably other proteins. Crunchy peanut butter sugar free cookies (experimental first try)
Should I create an Instagram to “socialize”? I’m not very good at it (autistic) but am trying to be a good humanz.
I take pictures of carpet and squirrels.
New carpet in my space! (Living room)
And I want to grow lots of plants – so will use free non GMO seeds from the seed library at the local hub. I will do my best to minimize costs of startup. Plants help you breathe.
I think going into hiding is best.
What do you think?
Dining room carpet replaced! Mental health boost!
I have a place I rent / but it’s not really where I live / a city of cement / regret, prayer, lament
For instance, yesterday while waiting at a very long stop light on beach street, this immigrant was walking around half-dressed with a baby stroller, he crossed the crosswalk and I yelled “pedophile” (because I’m calling every man I see this now apparently – but especially him) and he looked back, so I yelled louder.
The light still wouldn’t change.
I noticed the car beside me also had their window down/cracked
I was like, “He shouldn’t be alone with a baby” and she laughed and cried, “I know”
I stated, “I don’t normally do that but no man should be alone with a baby” in which she responds again with “I know” and mentions how he was dressed
(It’s summer but every man acts as if they own the world, women are fed up yeeeee)
We got to continue our back-and-forth manhating for at least another 30 seconds or more until the light finally turned and I reluctantly said I had to go
There was a cop ahead at the oncoming light but I still had thoughts of “gasing” my vehicle or honking him rudely as he passed
I behaved but then the body screamed PEDOPHILE and he acknowledged and the car next to me concurred (more than once)
I gotta get out of this city, this town, these people, these policies
I continue to assess my “mental health”, and stay in the now, the cars read ROUGE
I wholeheartedly agree, it’s time
5 monster men just kidnapped an older lady, FBI put out a reward, she’s dead
The news have not reported this, it’s just something I feel
The same way I knew my sister was dead before she died
And all it took was a text from my half-sister, “she’s in the hospital with COVID” and I replied “she’s gonna die”
I didn’t go say goodbye
She died
I had a big ole blood clot and blown left lung – from the deathcare system, and was heading no where near a hospital and never will again
I would get arrested, keep me the fuck away from that god damn Satan house
BE GONE
And stop casting spells on me, they only empower me more
The mirrors are nearly gone, I potentially found a owner for the pair I got
MARK BURGESS is swine and the curse will unfold in time
The Last One of Us is not just a game
I’ve not played it – but according to research, “the elites were plagued with parasites” and there’s a super fungas strain plaguing California (where MB hangs)
FYI
The CDC are blaming “the wind”
Yeah sure and he’s an immigrant from the UK
Well, I’ve no idea his green card status or his whereabouts or whatifs
I dream of justice, real justice
Swift and remorseless
It’s not a sin
Eye for eye
My heart is feeling good enough to kickbox a face or two
Encouraging seeing big boy swim in hurricane swells — I’m learning to tame my own demons – albeit not well
Because I wound up at the park – letting every man know he was either a pedophile in love with a prostitute or “another motherfucker who thinks he owns the world”
One looked up and I instructed him to call the cops cuz it’s the only time I ever “feel anything”
No cops came.
Shame.
Too tiny. Gonna get shot or kidnapped (I’ll rip your hand and dick off)
KEEP 10 FEET BACK
I might finally be getting to see the lung doctor – after nearly blowing my lung out April 2021
Some boy I don’t really know but had a dream about when I was like 8 and he was perhaps still growing in-womb (not mine, eww) – saved my life – kinda
Because he was “kinda there” with his own selfish needs but was apparently everything I needed in moment, because he dumped loads of chemicals into me, which maybe kept my heart from stopping
I was in so much pain
My heart was having mini pre heartquakes – like heart attack – would actually need medical help if my electrical output continued leaning in that way
I literally could not breathe (and have developed new ways of coping as I have a heart condition now)
Furthermore, they may not tell you this per say, but those with heart inflammation are at risk for Adult Sudden Death Syndrome, and so I’m not out of the woods yet, as I can’t do anything that causes elevation spikes in my heart (adrenaline rushes, or even stress/anger) though I can rebound now on my gravity fitness trainer, and mine is made with special straps, not bungee cords, and I finally found more made in those style and hope to upgrade soon
I’m quite bonded with my squeaky trainer and was gonna use it til it had no life left
My body is ready for a new trainer – a tighter pad – maybe smaller too (I think mine is 36 inch)
Men: “women haven’t contributed anything to society and are only good for childbearing or serving me”
Me: I don’t want your fucking electricity
And I’m nearly tired of the $100 oil changes
$5 oil change, 10 minutes
I argued about inflation and maths and economics in college
I knew globalization was bullshite
I wasn’t for it but the would sell the propaganda and the kids ate it up
Evolution theory is bullshit
I’ve been reading books on quantum physics – Cox and his clocks, y’all are delusional pedophile nihilist and NASA is a fraud – stop taxing me
Neil Armstrong never spoke to anyone from the moon, it was recorded on earth, they had no communication towers according to NASA, the moon landing’s were rehearsed, with a fucking Hollywood director, wake fucking up
Women please especially – now before I wind up a statistical
93% of all murders happen by men (their punishment getting lighter while ours gets worse)!!!!
We’re in a 6th mass extinction!
That’s why 500 whales washed ashore, the bombs they keep setting off in our oceans!!!!! Hello!!!!!!!!!! Science is fun!!!!!!!!
Imperialism. Imagine unplugging from the great machine as a Soldier, I’ve come undone!!!!
And now they wanna lock us up for destroying us with malicious intent and purpose!!!
Some vet just murdered his 3 young children – took everything from his ex wife – who left him a key to her home – he shot his children sleeping in their bed
You’re all monsters!!!
They’re selling dicks at the mall in front of children!!!! And online at Walmart in the health and wellness!!! Why you shopping there? Everything is cancer!!!! Read the labels!!!!
We go to war with our neighbors and then let them come live here!!!!! They hate us!!!!!! CMON!!!
White slavery! The Great Replacement theory is real!!! I’m part of the 244!!!
Do you know who I am pedo!!!!!
God is very real and gracious and angry!!!!!!
Mother earth deserves more!!!!
I hate it here!!!! This civilization you claim you created because women are useless!
Fuck you! You wouldn’t be here without us!!!!!
You’re pissed about it!!!
The Developer!!!! Ha ha charade you are!!!
The Great Filter is real! It’s you!!!!!!
I can smell your stench like Agent Smith!!!!
I don’t trust a Chinaman in my country or a white boy or BLM or Latino lives matter – took all our jobs!!!!!!
I’d love to get back to an ethical job but none exists!
Stop asking for my email or digital identity!!!
I’ve sold my TV, the propaganda machine!
And tho my expensive Apple devices aren’t very old, they’ve forced us outdated, I’m not buying again
I don’t love you!!!! Or your society!!!
WordPress sold out!!! It’s all daily prompt in the feed!
I got rid of everything I own!!!!
I’m ready to dawn a robe!!!!
I don’t know how I’m reaching out to you with a brain, heart, lung injury – plus a curse
But alas miracles!!!!!!!!!!
I’m sorry for my weird behavior – it’s just the Matrix is broken, I’m gonna keep not complying!!!!!!
Morrison wanted to fuck/kill his parents and ghosted them
Father Jim
I sold all my vinyl
I tossed out things that I thought had monetary value in the bin
Many I donated or gave away
Some I sold for a quarter knowing I paid extra for the bonus disc and features, but in the end, it’s worth was obsolete
I’m not jumping from platform to platform for the developers who have yellow fever and think they are gods
Fuck social media – it destroyed the fabric of eveything
Our economy
And porn and its filthy consumers
This boy of young teenage age was staring at me in a sexual way, I snarled my lip
In an alternate universe, there is a sinister version of me, cutting of dicks, and leaving little smily faces on the walls – cuz no one has discovered my identity
🙂
So… if I dream of casting spells on someone who entered my life – then let me hang a horseshoe from my door
The same these scientists don’t believe in God but do a blackhole
It is increasingly hard to listen to the dribble of super religious freaks, knowing many are atheists themselves but push it on us anyway
Do this, do that!!!
I don’t really believe Asia was/is the most advanced species anymore
They are our number one threat and should fear the bery ground they walk on here
Here a demon, there a demon, I’m gonna expose you
I hope I settle down soon, the new carpet arrives Tuesday
I’m still focused on healing, spiritually, mentally, physically, financially (they did steal thousands of my retirement during the pandemic while I was disassociating, FYI)
I lost at least half
But those who took it were traveling to exotic locations during the pandemic – buying luxury phones and cars – with my retirement money
JFC
*insert slang*
But then, they cry “Asian hate”
It’s burns a bit deeper than that
I don’t think hate describes what is growing in me
No one ever says they wanna be an elite serial something when they grow up
People who write things like, “those who say they don’t like money but go work an 8 hour job” don’t consider that being homeless is an actual crime
Born into money, never struggled a day in their life
Don’t know hardship
Gotta incite riots to feel anything
Dead inside
Weak spirits
Lost souls
Dead man drowning
Perhaps I the same
I like feeling and seeing the sun rise and fall everyday
I appreciate how happy the wildlife are when I feed em
They tell us not to feed the wildlife but then capture and enslave these intelligent beautiful creatures for our entertainment and sell their teeth for luck
Parasites – narcissism is a plague
Nihilist
That’s all they are
And all me and the white girl can do is laugh about the insanity of it all
I can’t keep yelling and screaming pedophile, I’ll wind up in a swamp or freezer
That’s already a fear because they follow me out of places I shop, they stalk me, because I’m cute to them
I wish my ear would stop ringing
Need out the city
Helps
The crime is so bad where I live
And it’s being gentrified, just like WP
The CEO has yellow fever
P.S. you never needed to block me cuz you never added my number (I hate you)
(It wasn’t even your main two lines)
Last in, first out
Woot
I’ve met a lot of boys but none looked like the boy I dreamed about nor do any make my heart/brain/pp do what you make it do
Don’t make me delete my blog
Some lines I’m too afraid to cross – but do so erratically
She took the house and kids – probably cuz he was bad – but loved him and let him keep a key – probably to see the kids anytime he wanted – so he took everything from her – killed the kids and himself
But go ahead and blame gun laws and everything but what is to blame…
Keep puffing on my house motherfucker…
It ain’t even my house and I’m paying more than a mortgage – another problem man made
So – were you aware – that universities are on WordPress and require students to use WordPress to post and respond to other students post – and receive GRADED reports
Cuz that wasn’t in the Privacy policy or any of the FAQ or payment policies
I’m not just paying to reach my tribe – they are flooding the network however they can – so we can chase our tails – meanwhile the younger generations get fed with a platinum spoon – this society
We’re paying in the upwards of $300 -$600 to maintain our blogs/ websites every three years – to reach students and faculty! (Or around $150 annually)
Did you ever think God needs you here to keep this place from going under You’re light and thunder Relax your plunder I need you longer To wake from slumber Realize the hunger
Could you please let God know I’m exhausted and need to rest a bit longer.
These demons have not stopped pounding me since I was born.
My dreams consist of multiple murder and full vape pens.
The mind normally gets what the mind wants
The face may show sadness, the eyes show rage
“The scientists” say that once bees are dead – all life will vanish
“The scientists” have fucked around with the genetic coding of honey bees, which has resulted in a 50% life reduction drop.
The honeybees only live 50% of the life God had intended for them – now that the “scientists” have reduced their genes to half life.
They thought the bees would be “more productive”. Pay attention
These demons are killing EVERYTHING
I do not fear imprisonment, my heart would self-annihilate or I’d ensure humane ending via a cop ending my life prematurely
Keep swinging your dick on the road like you have more importance than everyone women
Tell me something is wrong with me again
I’ll respond: what’s the matter honey? You in-love with a prostitute?
Yes. We know you all are.
The studies say over 50% of men want love with a prostitute and would legalize prostitution
There’s also a direct link to sex trafficking and prostitution – with testimony from men, “she looked trafficked and frightened and underage but it’s what I want”
Fuck you
Cut me off again, anywhere, anyday
You only treat prostitutes with respect huh
Like this book “racing the light” that I checked out from the library just yesterday – nowhere in the synopsis did I know porn would be the subject.
So far, the writer has used his characters to complain about the daily women, one being a “skinny scarecrow”, the other being “fat” – yet glorifying the porn star on the poster, how she looks amazing wearing “all black”. How they wouldn’t fuck her during a podcast show because they have boundaries
GET IN THE FUCKING SEA
I’m done reading!
Chapter 7! He’s on his way to meet the famous pornstar!
Gag me! I’d rather die than live in this porn infested society!
Stop conditioning!
This book should not be at the library!
Walmart and the mall should not be selling sex equipment in front of children or me!!!!!!!!!
FUCK YOU
Tell God I’m angry!!!!!!!
The honeybees deserve more!
Science is unethical!
Art is sin!
90% of all murder happen by men!!!!!!!!!
The other ten percent I’m contemplating falling in!
So many men are committing crimes they are reducing sentences – opposite for women – hardly any do so punishment is more severe
Rules for thee, not for me
I’m gonna fuck you up if you smile at me incorrectly or refuse to open the door when you see me
Cut me off again
I triple dare you
Money don’t mean shit to me
Ending your pathetic society tho – like Bonnie and Clyde
I dream of it
DAYDREAMS
Of bloodletting
With the de-lite
BLACK LIVES MATTER / ASIAN HATE ✓
All before morning coffee
Born this way
Need him to go where I’m going
The library is no longer a safe place for me – I’m angry and contending with that now
I sensed this with the LGBT and Boomer staff lurking and the “smell of lies” and the street political thugs in gold begging for my signature
Still there was hope
Briefly
It didn’t last very long
People ruin everything
I’m finely crafting my monster and angelic side –
Men have suppressed me from sex and defense
They get sex and murder – with the slap of a hand
Cut me off again
I can’t be the only woman feeling this way
Gonna start a riot
The way doctor lady swallowed when I told her “according to the latest studies over 51% want love with a prostitute and would vote yes”
Gutted her right there in her stool
Continued gutting her with more facts
I’m maybe the Oracle but get treated like Agent Smith
I’m maybe Neo Trinity Morpheus too
“Why me Gabriel” (you’re going to hell for the life you took – you’re fucked)
Should I join the order of Satanism? I was reading over their website – I read the DR book age 16 – it cost money to join – they say titles are earned – whatev, give me Priestess or fuck off – I will keep my $$$
Also, should I join? The order?
Of Satanism?
Revenge is a dish served by an Angel rogue in hell
It’s just another form of narcissism carefully crafted
“We’re not religious but we are, we think we’re Gods”
LAUGHS
Oh yeah?
So adorable
I really enjoy spending time in the sun getting “weathered” and feeding all God’s creatures
Probably causing them more harm but the intention is good
Tell God I’m sorry for being such a fuck up
I know I’m suffering cuz I died via suicide – this hell
But when do I?
I’ve been conditioning myself to do it since in womb
Age 5 on the kindergarten – got in trouble for putting “string around my neck and pulling” – wasn’t allowed sunshine or going outdoors for weeks (fuck you)
You treat prisoners better than civilians
I’ve got scars from cutting on my body
Charming
I worry more about my stretch marks than I do scars over my big veins
It should be illegal anyway – forcing us to pay rent online
Fucking move
Into a tent if you gotta…
I’m still waiting for my rent payment to go through – since the 31st
Paid my rent ahead of schedule – now collecting late fees – new management in the apartment instructed to “not even call Domuso support” and they have to call – to give permission to cancel it – since it’s in an “authorized status” according to Domuso – whom I contacted myself.
I guess they want me chasing my tail about my rent – worrying about fees and whatnot. I’m not.
Back to check writing.
And I dare you to make me homeless for refusal to “pay online” like you are enforcing other apartment buildings to do.
Go check the reviews about this company. They out there stealing money from folks.
It’s now day 9 and my payment is still pending and I’m not allowed to cancel it in an “authorized status” – the apartment complex must call Domuso and give the approval – but management says to “wait” and “we’re not allowed to call…”
Meanwhile, the fees are collecting and I went in with my checkbook ready to fix THEIR MISTAKE (I’m using the same bank I’ve been – no changes, my bank isn’t withholding my payment – nor do they have any reason to) but they refuse to do anything about my pending payment in cyber space and were ready to put a late notice on my door.
Do.
I dare you.
I have contacted Domuso via email and phone – same generic response, “your property needs to accept the transaction” but why should they when they can quietly quit and rack up charges and evictions on poor unsuspecting dumb folk
Those were the questions asked of me after I was rudely cut off on the road, so I rudely began following him, to wherever we were now going.
We wound up in a parking lot for several minutes – he threatened the cops – they never came.
Got his license plate number anyway
Stalked him until he was sweating anyway
But y’all keep giving yourself away
I should have responded “homicidal” but asked “was he in a rush to get to his prostitute.”
Of course, he called me a “manhater” LAUGHS
I’m ready to rip your veins from your neck – and your cock – with my teeth
Please keep risking my life – and then insulting me when I call you out
When he threatened to call the cops, I responded: “I hear restraining orders don’t work – and the more you have the less they work. Please call the cops.”
He retreated to inside his vehicle – but it didn’t stop me circling his vehicle like a vulture
So – y’all are making us depressed with malicious intent and purpose – so we’ll “get a job” and “see a therapist” – something must be wrong – we cry and boys don’t. Ohh boo
90% of all murders happen by men.
Please keep pissing me off
P.S. the jobs and medications to keep me asleep while you live a double and triple evil life – no longer work
Maybe you should have treated ALL WOMEN with respect, not just the prostitutes you’re “in love with” according to the latest studies “most men want love with a prostitute”
*throws up
Fuck you
Cut me off again
I double dare you
P.S.S. That’s TWO days in a row I’ve had the cops threatened on me.
P.S.S.S. Might be meeting my future husband soon and getting a new home. Do you think I’ll get visitation?
I currently can’t contribute to them but I can move them around and they are EARNING intrest
I’m not working currently but I could move them to an outside 401K or IRA
I have them nestled in a “safe” zone and I thought I had drained them and closed them – I had not :p
I had a weird lesson yesterday while waiting on the cops to show up for me – whom never arrived – even after waiting ten minutes in the parking lot – driving off a few blocks – returning and beeping my horn – still no cops – dern.
My future husband may be a cop – and cuffing me would only turn me on – as I’m dead inside with no adrenaline glands to tease me
So please – do as you say you will do – and call
(I did in fact see one turn and head that direction – just like in a video game – I thought – I’m playing real life – the heat is on – retreat.)
But in the games I have adrenaline.
I’m too calm taming the beast.
All these NPC’s getting in the way of my big mission
Cuz I came home and discovered I ain’t broke entirely
I could start the process to withdraw my money – at a 20% taxed penalty.
Or, move my funds into a “high risk” fund.
Maybe start with the smaller account, play around with him first.
I have nearly $12K
One with over 10k (big heart eyes) and one with over 1K (big heart eyes)
Money should make me feel something but it never has
I’m careless spending
I took a loan on it during my transition – thought I pulled it all – apparently I set myself up for success during my fall
AMAZING GOOD GIRL
I do want to take a financial class and I hope my next book I check out will be Americanized and not British – as the book I checked out was all about pounds (it did not say this anywhere on the cover or insert, only in the preface you cunt) – they (the brits) get to sit down on the job – life is different for them – and how they earn thus save. Fuck off, book returned partially read.
I will sign up for free financial assistance – they offer the vets this – fuck us up the ass but say “don’t worry, we offer free advising”
Sign me up
I’m paying attention this time
I still need a husband to manage my finances
I won’t have a husband cuz he’ll message “he’s running late” and I’ll demand a divorce since he’s “seeing a prostitute”
A Skype call will come in 2 minutes later where an entire team will yell “he’s madly in love with you” and he’ll come through the door with chocolate edible roses after the meeting
Since he humiliated me with the Skype call – had me red blushing – the whole office laughing
In 2018 the judge didn’t want to speak to me “until I took three breaths” because “I looked like I was about to jump from the bridge behind us” and I told her my parents didn’t teach me about credit or those kinds of monsters under my bed – she said hers did and she still messed up
But I thought I drained my retirement savings “staying afloat”
BB had on a life jacket apparently
So I called this morning, “I don’t know why I created a new account when there’s no money in it and I can’t do anything with it”
Well, turns out, I do have money – in two accounts – both earning – they can be moved to other funds (some safe, some risky) or moved to an outside 401/IRA.
If I start work again, I can contribute to them (disabled not obsolete)
I could take it all out right now and buy some land or a home
I’m done pawning things and selling things
I have a “savings problem” just like China (it creates inflation)
Monkey see, monkey do
I urge you to start saving too
Let the window clerk quietly quitting give you the fuel you need
Pick up that dirty money on the ground
I may pick up the lost dirty money but I don’t steal tip money you fucking cunt
Let that be the cue you need to quit spending thousands of dollars on weed that don’t work
The audacity
I am not your sanctuary for healing after you’ve committed a bad deed
My soul has boundaries
My thoughts too
I didn’t tell my sister goodbye when she was dying at age 45
So please, call the cops on me after you’ve insulted me multiple times, I will wait
My future husband may be arriving to arrest me
Maybe I will feel something
Uhm, I’m not as broke as I thought I was!?!
I woke up in a different timeline again
Where I have some retirement investments still – despite the Great Economic fall – I had a lifeline
“Life Jackets worn – nobody mourns” HOOAH
I am a wild anomaly
Still might be homeless soon – can’t have a feeling – but definitely be needing that new carpet if I inhabit these grounds another year
Apparently hotel living can cost about as much as a rental each month – but it may include coffee and zero commitment
Now might be a good time to chill out and not get arrested
It’s just, I’m feeling what Edgar felt and responding accordingly
Sure I look like a crazy wild ape, but they need to learn a lesson
God saw what he needed to see
I would have died with thousands of dollars I had completely forgotten about
LAUGHS
What other gold have I hidden in society
It’s been earning me interest all these years
I think it’s important to discuss savings – so many out here struggling for various reasons
I thought I had lost it all
I have over ten thousand dollars in my one fund (not bragging, many years of investing into my fund through hard work) (getting up them early hours) (staying late) (pulling 60/90 hour work weeks)
Working 12 days straight in a row every month – without a day off – for nearly 8 years
And y’all complain when you go a week…
I worked the other weeks in the month too – just with a weekend off or two
I’m exhausted and disabled
But glad you don’t have to worry about quality control or ethics at your job – I’m done supporting society
And you want your tip first – giveme giveme giveme
Fuck you – I’m not tipping you so you can go get a hand job before you even bring me my meal
Poem coming soon. Cuz sometimes your environment makes you sick. I looked into it.
I can read between the fine print.
I was making 65k annually before the government hiring freeze.
Before the manmade pandemic. Before the immigrants stole my job. Then poisoned me with their snake oil.
I’ve been hanging out in a dark void. I can assemble their wicked thoughts.
I see dead people. Without souls. Demons congregating.
The boomers and LGBT working at the library treat me like a thief – cuz I’m genz – woken – and not under their godforsaken spell.
The next time grandpa overuses his power – by staring me down five minutes as I decide on a title to check out – I’ll walk over to the cop and ask him to please ask the worker to stop sexually harassing me with his eyes.
I’ll just skip the chain-of-command, and kick him directly in the balls. Hypothetically with humiliation.
And Mrs Boomer hates scheduling for classes – people miss those – so I’m gonna start – not even cancel.
After spending thousands of dollars at the medicinal shop, the clerk decided to count her tip money before I approached, I thought, look at this righteous cunt, how dare thee.
I’ve swore off my weed spending. The detoxification starts soon – cold turkey – as that was my last bill or tip ever.
I’m told I’ll be getting a renewal invite to remain at the heart of darkness.
It’s been nearly one year since that couple was gutted in the street – by a black immigrant – simply because they were “white” – and now they’re dead – and he gets 3 meals a day, a free roof over his head, dental, and an HOUR of sunshine for his MENTAL HEALTH – on us (the tax slave payers dollars = time/energy)
The political thugs in gold chains now want your signature – soliciting anywhere they legally can: the library, the mall, the medicinal shops.
Overjoyed.
I don’t know where I’m going – but I don’t have to prove anything to “remain here” as I’ve been stuck in purgatory so long now – I don’t have to provide any evidence of my existence.
Just keep paying the rent….
Do as say
But I yelled at the boomer Publix employee, “no bitch, you lost a fucking customer FOREVERRrrr”
Apparently we became a cashless society and she felt the need to rub it in, three times, scolding me in front of everyone around, my cash in hand, unable to pay.
“It says it right there” (honestly, you only need to point out my failure ONCE)
I’ve boycotted Publix forever
There’s poison and sugar and “natural flavor” in everything now anyway
“How did she die”
“Starved to death…”
“White people work out one time and be skinny” (latest neighborhood report on me)
The upside: they think I’ve only worked out once. Skinny. Weak bitch.
Let that be my fucking gain
In fact, at Burger King yesterday, the Mexican manager came out with two of her BLM pimps, when I told her to “step outside”
He was very upset when he heard me say, “oh you had to bring your pimps with you huh”
Very upset he got
Truth in fact hurts
I drove off too calm
The adrenal glands were not working
Even pulling off
“I’m too calm”
“Had to bring your pimps huh” I continue to yell, as traffic at the window was at a stop
They gonna run off all their white costumers with their terrible service
I ordered the “impossible king” and apparently that’s too complicated for certain species to get right
Though I repeated my order THREE times
Fuck it
I like starving anyway
I got my library card tho
And holyshit, that’s where I’ll be at the end of the world
Check the libraries
Leave clues a 5 year old could solve (anything harder and I’ll read the data wrong and wind up stuck in a fucking hole – as is now – with a heart condition – thanks to “television” and government – whom I no longer listen to in any capacity)
At least the library is ad free
I can read in silence
Love the smell of the old books
All them lies
There are perks to not being homeless (yet)
Aside from the thugs trying to solicit my signature in the parking lot – everywhere I go
In their gold chains…
I wanna puke
Stop talking to me
From now on
When someone interrupts whatever I’m doing solo
“Did I give you permission to talk to me”
And the ghosting will begin
And please cross my shadow
I know you’re trying so hard to break me out here
Of being a good Soldier, a good soul
But I swore my hand before the flag and God – and on my heart – and signed the dotted line – took my blood and all – to protect and defend the USA and its citizens – not DEMONS
And right now you stepping all up in the “fine print”
I dated for a lifetime and have nothing to show for it
STOP LOOKING AT ME
I’m ready to spit on these thug politicians in the street
FUCK OFF BRO
You can’t have my signature, my name, or my soul
Go back to your porn and prostitutes
I was trying to enjoy the jazz event – and men breaking their eyeballs to get a look
STOP LOOKING
I had to hold back the tears
Pretend the music was getting to me
Next week I hang with a cop who teaches about a Daytona Beach serial killer
Exciting! They want us living in fear!
Do I want to say yes to the “true encounters Daytona Beach serial killer” event. Yes I do.
I’m not even a jazz fan – but I went – and enjoyed (still cry anywhere)
The audiobook helped me not stalk anyone
But apparently I’m not allowed to order food anymore anywhere
Unless a yuppie place
I found something that sparked joy in me
It matches my values – it offers self-improvement and the entertainment is how it should be – without disruptions or ads
Easy scrolling interface
Eventually I’ll make my way to the science museum
The skate park and rinks
I checked out an express book
I’m 8 chapters in
I’m becoming present – and creating boundaries and discipline
My mind needs exercise – the books provide
The 2 week express lane gives me a challenge
You can’t renew those
I got my library card and it’s bringing me happies – can’t describe
So much to do too – free classes, movies at the auditorium, events…
I was also the youngest person at the jazz event
If you’re thinking about killing yourself – maybe get a library card instead
And be present
Read what you check out
Set time aside to read
Luckily – my first book was large print – that’s made reading a pleasure – no headaches or squinting – though the writer is a pedo – he’s brilliant – it’s no wonder I grabbed his book – of all books on the “new” shelf (express check out and no renewal)
I like all the digital perks that come with my card – as well as the real world perks – and I’m tapping into all
NOT READY TO DIE
But these monsters are ready for me to shed my light
Unfortunately, most animal shelter statistics paint a sad story. Though the progress in the years is evident, there’s plenty that can be done in 2022.
— Read on petpedia.co/animal-shelter-statistics/
Hail Hitler! He’s alive!
I’m old and sick! Euthanize me!!!!!
It’s not 60k annually anymore. The numbers are much much worse.
“Since 1970 68% of all life has gone extinct”
And children are being conditioned as children to support prostitution and porn. That’s why the divorce rate is 100%!
Got 1 vape the size of Texas, a 10 pack of indica blueberry edibles, and 7g worth of “premium ground”
Back home – hit the pen twice – feel the happies
I arrived “can you check my pen, I don’t know if it’s charging/working or in my head”
Gave myself 3 options tho
1. Cold cut quit (aggressive)
2. Not renew my state license in April – ween myself – slow quit
3. Not quit – pay the ridiculous fees – to maintain
4. Vote for recreational (nope, you’ll have to cut my dick off before I ever get out again and vote)
Look where voting for medicinal got me: an addiction
Prior to the government getting involved, weed never gave me no kind of addiction
Unless you count the feel goods
I’m literally more motivated on it
Suddenly, with my new flock of bird neighbors – and the medicinal two toke hit after several days none, I feel like I could clean up the slums
There’s a Gold’s Gym down the road – could like join
I’ll have to disassociate from dudes watching me
I think the guy at the shop is into me
Not sure how I wound up with six bucks back but took my buck and he was like “you got another five”
I only took X amount of cash in to avoid overspending
But between the 50% off deals + another military discount + more cash back than I had calculated, I’m square
Paid like 40 bucks or something
Also, the blueberry eddies are 10mg pieces, so I’ll be eating one with my dinner / evening bath
Not smoking to disassociate, just to function :p
I’m at a crossroads in my life
I decided to throw everything overboard!
I may jump!
Not to die!
To jump ship!
It’s terribly hard being autistic and suicidal: “how yah doing today”
“I ain’t looking for a bridge to leap, and the sun is out!”
Politically probably not correct but honest to the core
The other customer was listening to me order and him give me all kinds of recommendations lol
“I haven’t slept in 3 days and sometimes I just need a sativa”
I think he pretty much ordered everything – I went in as a walk-in
But he seems keen to service me
And she was like “sorry for listening” lol
But I was trying to hurry cuz others arrived and I even offered to get out of line – anyhoo – he listened to what I needed – his suggestions were good – including where I could buy a decent pipe to smoke the flower, cuz the shop I went to sold me a non working glass pipe – and I love wasting my money
Right now I got rice papers from the medicinal shop – and those were tricky to learn – but they are slow burning – and aren’t as strong (very smooth paper but probably poisoned)
Like I registered to vote for recreational a couple months back – but that was before my meltdown
I’m having a midlife crisis
Right now I’m sitting on clean linen and thinking I might could manage this dump a bit longer – if it means land for me in the future
If I were to renew, I’d want fresh paint and carpet.
I mean, the apartment is nearly empty and I’d pay them an extra $200 to lay some fresh paint
(The carpet would need to be a free replacement as part of the renewal agreement – especially as long as I’ve been here – and the COVID pandemic)
This isn’t a good time to be homeless
People aren’t returning emails or phone calls about places I wanna live
And “Astoria” was a big mistake
I don’t want anywhere near this county or HollyWood
I don’t know where I’m going or what I’m going to do
I have a very busy day doing real world stuff
I hate real world and would rather disassociate
Because people are involved
And I have to be civil
I identify as Angelic and this is spiritual warfare
I’m like fight mode 24/7
The birds moved near me
It’s changing me
I don’t disassociate making content and I wanna get in the headspace to get back at it
I’ve been self-loathing
But also working out – I wanna get the peach in shape
The boobs need a little weight
Half my kitchen was donated or trashed
Some is packed – it might get trashed too
Pantry is empty
Everything is on the table remaining
The lease is up in April
There’s been no invite to renew yet nor have I given any 60 day warning
Don’t know what month to month rent would cost (like if I needed an extra 2 or 3 months to find my new home) (and stay without a 12 month lease) (if they still do that the costs go up)
I don’t want to be homeless dying
My bathtub is good enough
As far as rebuilding my financial wealth – I’m working on it
The little cushion I have, doesn’t go far in a 40% inflated economy – realistically – and per research
If I could get to a gym – and get outside these walls
I’m just re-inventing myself – even if to start fresh
I need a sterilized and stable foundation
I prayed to God “I need to be closer to Pretty Bird” and he sent me a flock
Swear to fuck
Clean bed sheets tonight
Weed
I have to be careful with this new age shit, it can trigger my ptsd and suicidal ideation
Sometimes you need to take a break and let other people order for you
I don’t really want folks offing themselves – I say terrible things – I’ve slept with the devil
God knows I sinned
I tell him often I’m not worth anything – while begging “don’t let me die here”
It’s complicated
I’m hungry
Food is good
I have leftover soup and bread
I’m trying to find my place in this world – and balance
I’m a Soldier, I like working out – but now I do things differently since I’m at risk of ASDS
So proud of myself for finally reaching my ten minute rebound goals this week
And then 20… 🙂
I’m glad people notice my efforts in the real world – I’m sensitive about my skin scars and stretchmarks tho
Don’t mind my giggly boobs but they need some foods (been ill but also working out and detoxed too)
Got down to 110 in fact, now putting the weight back on
Was 112 last at the VA (will check soon)
Been several weeks tho and I’ve been rebounding most of January 🙂
I’m starting to see thick in the front – like the quad maybe or thigh area
My leg muscles are forming more and tight
My stomach is pretty flat but could be better
I want more tattoos 🙂
Would help make the new me 🙂
Something feminine and cliche
Flowers
Wouldn’t mind some tasteful flowers on my hip area but I gotta find a real artist
I don’t want to decide what will look good on me and the exact spot
Like bro, do your fucking job
I need to hire a decorator for my new lifestyle
I’m a Soldier and poet
I know war and I know words (terribly)
These days it’s the algorithm fucking me up 95% of the time
I miss being a Soldier
I miss my comrades
Gift giving is the heart of tribal union – exchanging gifts. Now I know why I do this.
It’s not my fault others think it’s “too much” or never return anything. I wasn’t in it for returns.
I give because I want to
It’s tribal
I have the eldest and rarest bloodtype – with only 6-11% of the population having it
Seeing a sex worker for the first time is one of life’s greatest thrills. But it comes with a bit of a learning curve. If this is a recent hobby, you may have noticed two of the most common phrases in the escort industry: ‘girlfriend experience’ (GFE) and ‘porn star experience’ (PSE).
— Read on tryst.link/blog/girlfriend-experience-and-porn-star-experience-the-facts-vs-the-myths/amp/
“Life’s greatest thrills” huh!
Regular women should stop having sex with men. Let them pay for it forever more, the fantasy! They’re so bored with us anyway. They don’t want sensual sex. That isn’t what the porn industry conditions them to do, nor the prostitutes.
And it states right here, “porn isn’t real. Big dicks and endless sex isn’t real”. “You have to treat your PSE professionally”
Meanwhile the divorce rate is over 85%
I feel I was left behind sexually.
The only justice is knowing these prostitutes are actually miserable and disassociating while performing sex work. It’s fake fantasy. Delusions of grandeur. Unrealistic.
But the money is under the table and tax free and many men go during “working hours”
So I’m no longer looking at man in the real world – in any capacity
They’re in-love with the porn stars and prostitutes (according to scientific studies)
Except, it’s not real.
The prostitutes – according to studies – create alternative personas while doing sex work – causes negative mental health – and men do not need to be tested for STD or STI – even though they are the silent carriers – often without any signs or symptoms – which can lay dormant for years – and parasites and cancer can be spread from semem, as well as simple skin-to-skin contact.
I’ve shared every study backing this up.
The prostitutes “rub their back” before doing sex work – and they do not use the same style to connect in their personal lives – they make up personas to get through the sex work – many were abused as children, forced into sex work.
Prostitution is a direct link to sex trafficking – making prostitution legal creates MORE human trafficking – which they now have undeniable proof of.
Many countries have made prostitution legal, while other countries have made it illegal but still sell sex via entertainment – creating street hookers, violence, and other negative social impacts. The doors to America remain open for sex trafficking.
Furthermore, the divorce rate is over 85%.
Prostitutes do not “enjoy” their line of work – disassociating from what they do – separating personal life from work – over 75% remain “single” and “would never marry the men they service” – even though they program them to love them (some maintaining sex relations with “repeat customers for years”)
And the fact that they can’t fall in love or show signs – makes it more exciting to them
They walk in with their dicks hard and ballsack full – ready to shoot them their biggest load
These prostitutes don’t even like the line of work
Porn and prostitution is creating monsters in a soulless society
Women and children at home – suffer extreme abuse
Porn isn’t real – it’s fantasy football. It’s soap operas in the nude on repeat. Porn stars fucking themselves in the ass with a wine bottle for decades – then taking a drink
Same story over and over
And the men get hooked as CHILDREN – many get into porn and prostitution by their own fathers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
They have brain rot! Their primal side of the brain is activated – hence all the crime!!!!!!!!!
It’s the devil!
They’re selling sex toys at the mall and Walmart, CVS, Walgreens, Dolls Kill, and many more! It’s not behind a curtain!!!
It’s a society of sickness
Our very foundation is built on a sin and lie
All so men can go to war in exotic lands and experience exotic women – while the wives are at home
It’s turned into a well-oiled beast
It’s demon vs human down here (likely opinion but I identify as Angel Baby)
They say in the press that “narcissism is rare” but it’s actually a plague
They say psychopaths “are born” but a “narcissist is made”
Yeah, and it starts in the Bible (narcissism is throughout), with porn and prostitution
Big government is to blame
“The sins of the father”
Apparently you will experience 3 deaths: one when you die, the second when you are buried, and third and finally, the last time your name is ever said.
I’ll probably wind back in “Misery” because there’s only one person I want to see me dead – or bury me.
So if I wind up in his yard half-alive, it won’t be long. I will likely be nude – like our dear Edgar, to keep with tradition
Don’t make fun of my emaciated frame
You don’t know what holes I crawled out to get here
I was reaching depth blackout – but I am slowly retreating – and repenting these days – I think that’s what the holes in the wall mean – repentance and awakening
God put me down here on this earth to judge you
Taking my freedom of speech – silencing me from atrocities – will not stop me from truthmonging
But I’m still a woman with needs unmet, with a private strip club, where the devil is kept (poetry)
LAUGHS
Apparently it’s not a good time to move but I feel I will die if I stay here (it’s not just a “feeling”, there are many red flags)
90% of all homicide happen by men (verifiable)
Since 1970 68% of all life has gone extinct (verifiable)
We are in a 6th mass extinction (verifiable) (over never ending porn, prostitution, sex trafficking over 6000 years)
The leaders running things serve Luci
Apparently I was right about the enemy in the White House because the females are upset the law was changed (mostly voted in by men) – that they cannot show their shoulders
LAUGHS
They kept fucking with the female Soldiers changing the regulations telling us how to wear our hair, nails, makeup. I got out.
It was already strict when I swore my life to “America and our way of life” – which has been completely destroyed by immigration
Had no idea the waters I was swimming in
I had no idea the seabed could drag you down due to gravity – and with the pressure of the ocean above – you sink quickly
They are turning Florida into Dubai – but FL is limestone – and sinking – so not a good idea
The floods, the condos collapsing, I ain’t all talk
You have to turn it off if you want to change
I know you think you want how you are – but I don’t buy it
You have to remove predictive programming
I never said it was easy
I’m done supporting toxic masculinity society
I just still have hope I might get through to someone – who might change for the better
As far as the hypocrisy of doing nude art, I’m not compromising my soul, I find it therapeutic, I’m not disassociating to make photography or poetry
At the moment I’m overcoming dying and a major illness – heart inflammation and depression
I’m barely working or putting out content unless you count my blog work – and WordPress says I’m on a 19 day streak or something
I’m also in the middle of getting rid of everything I own – either in an attempt to save my life or end it
The odds are set
I’m just awaiting the verdict
And if I’m gonna be “responsive or reactive”
Don’t judge me
That’s my job, that’s what God put me here to do (potentially)
In the court room: “because God ordered me to do it”
The only thing God should be ordering you to do, is “tender mercy” (tho I’m not obliged to be telling him what you outta do)
They bleach their skin. Cuz Black Lives Matter. And according to the census, White lives don’t. FACTS
Asia number one
And I would’ve probably believed in the whole biblical bullshit had they not tried to convince me about some magical woman getting pregnant without any cum or some dude walking on water and now they want me to believe in dark matter, dark suns, dark worlds, dark planets – I mean you’re fucking delusional and I believe in death.
Narcissism is a plague
Those in “control” are nihilists
Man comes from vagina
Woman does not come from rib of man but vagina
FACTS
The first Bible can be traced back to Asia
“Made in China” – that’s what every Bible should say – not just the version cuz it’s been rewritten to serve Satan a million times
The Good Book with “words of Christ in red” should have never been rewritten. Period. Red flags. It’s conditioning.
And I knew it was all about control when I was just age 5.
I hated the cold atmosphere of school – and the misinformation taught
I even asked my mother, “who is in charge of what they teach us”
People like killing dogs and cats too. Facing my own issues with an animal; I find end-of-life services to be inhumane and Hitler regime.
Many just give up, shelter’s are full – animals will be sacrificed.
I’m not making this up. They are eager to take that money too.
One humane society charges more for you to “go back”. A significant amount more.
I’m autistic, “what do you mean “go back” and she explained – “to watch – to be with them” – “that cost more”.
And, an additional cost if you want a “box or urn”.
He’s had 3 end of life appointments made – one with his primary veterinarian, two with the humane society.
I called eventually a third time and stated, “I won’t be able to do this by appointment, I’m having a hard time letting go”
Because – I researched the chemical used to stop their heart – their bodies jerking around.
When someone ODs they go out peacefully and you can call it humane, but I disagree that End Of Life Services are anywhere but “humane” when their bodies are literally jerking around.
My grandmother let her dog “die naturally”.
Anyhoo – I’m against abortion and apparently against manmade animals from a lab getting sacrificed to the dark entity
My dog has a strong heartbeat and will to live. He may be a hellhound – but he’s my hellhound for “better or for worse”.
He may qualify for end-of-life services, and that may be the “easier” path for me – but it requires ending a life, stopping a heart. I do not comply.
And I’m so fucking depressed and suicidal that I would rather jump off a fucking bridge than figure out what to do with my dog, which means I’ve quit weed so that I can figure out what to do with my fucking dog because apparently this new age weed complicates PTSD (hear, hear) and causes suicidal ideation
Also, these drugs folks are doing, probably have code written in them, that’s why they see “the same thing”. 
Autistic doesn’t mean “dumb”.
Gullible sure. I know that they use art and cartoons to imprint on us.
NASA is extreme religiousness – they “the physicist” now are pushing “dark worlds” with “dark suns” and “dark planets” – made of “dark matter”.
It’s one extreme to the next – from walking on water to miracle pregnancies – to “dark worlds”.
They serve a dark entity.
Can I please have a tech free zone? Tech free state? 
It’s narcissism. They don’t want us in the game when we come from “rib of man” – like they see us as sex objects only. Why would we get equal pay when we belong in the kitchen.
Why do ordinary, respectable men visit prostitutes? Jacquelynne Bailey spoke to customers at Australian brothels to find out. Her interviews provide a rare insight into how some men see not just sex, but women.
— Read on amp.theguardian.com/world/2002/apr/08/gender.uk
It’s all been conditioning – these men have been buying sex since children
And now children can see and buy sex toys – toys aren’t behind a black curtain….
The Devil’s society…
Give it time, LGBT will have an orgy in the street.
Porn has ruined man
They fall in love with an idea – and the porn industry repeats the same story throughout years – with all sex workers.
They need the girls in the pictures so much that they use “commoners” as fleshlights
“No one knows why” – ahem bullshite it’s porn
Porn segregates us from unity, imprinting
Well – these boys are exposed to porn at a very young age and it imprints on them.
And image is important to them – gaslighting – so the Church offers a safe haven for these demons – who want us paying for their housing and meals.
They disassociate when they use porn so it’s like they become a completely different person and that’s why there’s no remorse when they do the shit that they do to you
They have an addiction created by the enemy to break up the traditional family value home – all while the immigrants take throne during “yellow fever”
Suicide is a top leading cause of death worldwide
Porn is the gateway drug to ruin
It could be easily censored like they do my free-speech
All the little commoners who get on onlyfans, they just use us up like they do in the real world 
Most anyway
OnlyFans say most users loose out – it’s only the top folks with value (society is the Titanic)
They steal money from users too
And as much as I love blogging, I don’t want to continue paying the enemy
Pay to play
I’d rather die than give the state another penny
And I can’t even visit Orlando without having to pay four tolls to return and they aren’t cheap anymore 
It’s the same fucking county, but I have to pay to return to the city I’m registered to live in.
Florida is gone
Overrun with evil and immigration
I mean immigrants get here and naturalize faster than we can even procreate or vote 
Native Americans were doing just fine here until my bloodline was nearly wiped out by the fucking immigrants that you say bring so much greatness to our country
I fantasize about dying by suicide in terrible and terrifying ways
I know you’re a nihilist and do not care what happens to me…
”To be seen and not heard” while man destroys everything
But as long as we are making him a meal and doing everything for him
While he jerks off to the pretty women prostitutes
And by telling a man not to fall in love with you, they probably absolutely fucking do fall in love with these prostitutes (not commoners)
Because even the guys without any teeth, think they deserve a ten star 
And I’ve never been rated a 10 or treated with any value
It’s gentrification and narcissism and those in power set the inflation rates.
They are the reason the rent keeps going up.
They weren’t hurting or remorseful when we were suffering. They were spending money on travel, entertainment, phones and cars. We were trying to pay rent and eat.
They’re amused by our suffering.
A 10% difference is a lot when the majority can’t eat while the rest are at play and having fun. Killing the world is fun!!! We’re kings!
I’m done. With everything. I no longer support society. I am withdrawing from everything. It does not serve God or the natural way.
This is so sad. We only get this one life. Our nation was crippled by immigrants who are not crippled.
I know what it says but look at the chart – immigrants have overtaken 3 of those categories and are quickly nearing the other 2 categories of work filled
And, according to the color, Florida is absolutely gone (same as California and New York – all owned by immigrants)
It’s tragic. Our mental health is directly connected to our dicks and vaginas. They sterilized and aborted an entire nation!
They’re still doing it with vaccines!!!!!!
I also learned the vaccines contain aborted babies (it’s real)!
The government needs shut down!!!!!!
This is tragic!!!!
It’s narcissism! It’s all serving the Devil!!!! Or darkness! It’s not unity or being one with earth!
Stop killing everything! Women and babies especially!!!!!!
Y’all are insane but want to commit me!!!
Immigrants have taken over California and New York and they are coming after Florida. Most Floridians say Florida has changed for the worse. 
The VA is corrupt and so is the White House
And according to the official stats, the majority of immigrants vote one way 
I will rise up
And if it takes five people to arrest me, five people will go fucking down
I’m fed up!
The fact that most Chinese thought the one child law policy was a good idea…. 
It also creates narcissism
They’ve ruined America with insurance and taxes and COLA 
They’ve ruined everything and everyone it seems
Too much control
And Genzie and millennials don’t give a fuck about anything so they’re not gonna rise up and fight anything except for the wind to light the fucking lighter for the goddamn weed
And their sex toys
LGBT is a cult
Sex toys are being sold everywhere in front of any age…. little curious boys looking at the anal plugs at Spencer’s
Can buy online at Walmart, CVS, Dolls Kill, Walgreens, ect
China is the biggest political fuck up power in the world 🛑🥴⚠️🫣👀🛑
And they took over America 🇺🇸
Constantly telling us what we can and cannot do
Crippling a nation with divorce, disease, depression!
I don’t fucking trust you if you’re in a position of power or brown-nosing these ridiculous policies.
And I think a lot of Americans are ready for the big immigration push back.
Too much conflict of interest – everything benefiting other nations (who took throne here).
Check the migration stats, jobs, and census. Do you have reading comprehension though?
This is 2023 (not really – it’s a manmade calendar and they took away a month! April fools! The gaslighting in this society never ends.)
Always got us chasing our tail!!!! 
It’s 7 years behind in Ethiopia
I wasn’t learning about that in school when they were teaching about “time zones”
I hated every moment of school and working 90 hours a week (2-3 jobs) to pay my electric and rent
I keep hoping to have hope – that my future includes a real bond with a man, as God intended. A pure love where he isn’t giving his best energy and time to other women.
But, even if a man is going through a Great Awakening, when he settles down, he’ll go for the young one.
All the violence. And we open our borders in America and let them extend the same violent upbringing on us. Porn is an issue but let’s just destroy the world so you can keep gaslighting and jerking off.
He bought his wife and demanded sex four times a day and beat her when she did not comply. Then she fled and left her 3 year old daughter with him.
Pedophilia starts in the home.
“Too many men” and too much violence. Porn activates the primitive side of the brain. Rape, murder, lies.
This society is all built on a crumbling lie.
Those in power want the world end so they can rebuild it under their fucking rule – using AI, and the DNA ark in Antartica.
They are playing god and creating a matrix filter (the great filter is real) where generations born will be made under them.
So they can claim all this as their own – as they believe they are god
The Bible has been re-written many times (it’s called versions dummy) and is Satanic
There is so much fearmongering and narcissism in the Bible. Just like Hollywood and NASA (asteroids are bombs)
I’m not saying asteroids aren’t real, but they can’t stop dropping bombs everywhere….
The way these narcissist delete lives and comments without any remorse
Therapy is just a stage for them to practice lying
Narcissism isn’t rare, it’s a fucking plague…
Spread by the Bible via Yellow Fever propagandist
And scientist say we’re in a six mass extinction and the Bible has been around 6000 years so you do the fucking math or don’t I don’t fucking care anymore
The census show BLM at over 230% rise and White Lives Don’t matter at a 10% decrease
“Since 1970 68% of all life has gone extinct”
Nihilism!!!!!
Women create. Men destroy.
And they don’t give anything enough time to replenish. The sea is not endless food for us. Your Bible is a lie!!!!!!
And it’s been pushed down my throat since I was born.
NASA is a dogma stealing your money
I don’t think CGI cartoon is what I had in mind when being taxed to death – to visit a dead planet because you can’t sit still long enough to stop killing this one
“90% of all murders happen by men..”
Yeah but…. don’t even look at me unless you want WW4
The wars will never end because the people in power have delusions of grandeur and are sending cars into fucking space
And now they’re moving asteroids and shit around?
My cell service continues to drop and lines are all in the ocean…
So basically, if you’re talking to me, you’re lying
That’s how fucking woke I am
Y’all believe aliens are real, and that computers have feelings
I do have one question for God and that’s: do Asians have the smallest penis of all and that’s why they fucking gaslight and do all this!?!
“Mirror mirror on the wall, Asian men have the smallest penis of all”
“So we’ll lie and program the world to think our childlike women have magical vaginas!!!!!!”
It’s all full circle now
It’s a game of the elite and I’m sick of playing delusions of grandeur
The cookie crumb traces back to Asia
And I’m sort of getting to the point if you don’t get me away to my own land and away from these fucking immigrants – things are gonna go fucking west pretty quick, and I don’t give a fuck if I wind up in a goddamn ditch
The fact that they raised taxes so much crippling a nation
But if you read articles about immigration, they will all claim they are doing well family and financially, but Americans will say the opposite, and the low paying wage jobs and homelessness proves it.
But you won’t listen over your green card or Yellow Fever
I’m fed up!
This is why I say I’m homicidal instead of suicidal and this is why I encourage people to just go fucking mad in the streets because fuck everything – they probably had it coming that goddamn street
That fucking morning shift deserved everything they got
How much you like your job again?
You like it that much huh
To treat customers and residents like we ain’t got no value
That calm you see from me
Ain’t really good
But I guess I’m learning to gaslight too
I’m starting to stalk people on the road
And I will wind up on a ditch if I don’t leave the city
At least I’m quitting the new age weed
So more emoness incoming
And poetry too
If God allows me to continue making a mess of everything
Those NASA images are just a fairytale
Elon’s education and hair is fake
He had connections
I can’t believe the fucking moon landings were rehearsed
If the government is talking, I don’t care to hear what they have to say
Let him get back to the holy inquisition yellow fever madness Magical pussies Walking on water Delusions of grandeur
Hello God
*waves*
It’s astounding to me that these yellow fever men do not have the sensibility to see – on the cover itself – which edition of the Bible they are reading
Because there are many versions
And they are different
The Old Testament versus the New Testament
The new revised standard version
The King James version
New International version
New Living translation
Just the fact that it was translated is a red flag – I watch basic movies in both languages – the original or translated – and the translated version most always certainly changes the meaning
Remember that study, where you tell someone something – and by the time it reaches the other end of the room – it’s completely changed.
Something simple like “the sky is red” will turn into “the sky is bleeding”! It’s obviously misleading (The Bible)
(I think I’ve read them all – I have a stack of varyingly different versions, some with the word of Christ “in red” (the conditioning), some that are super tiny, some large, and the first I ever received age 4 – in color, with a map).
Men try to control my every thought and move – but didn’t think I’d be smart enough to study the Bible and learn anything other than “to be seen and not heard”, “women come from rib of man”
No Asia, everyone comes from vagina – and not just magical Asian ones
Men come from vagina
Men cannot have babies
I will go down fighting
God exists outside the yellow fever Bible – that has been re-written many times – and the edition can be found on the cover – it’s not opinion asshole
Furthermore, I do have a degree and did study World Religions.
But because I’m white and female – my word will always just be “opinion” to man who creates and controls this entire delusional world – that I don’t want to participate in!
I don’t have value because I’m not an Asian with a magical sideways pussy.
Y’all are fucking insane
Porn destroyed you
But keep blaming marijuana as the gateway drug OK?
You’ll soon be selling sex toys at the church for health and wellness
The way you are now selling sex toys at Walmart, Dolls Kill, CVS, Walgreens, the mall…
You don’t even need to be 21+ anymore to enter
It’s all been conditioning
And because Asians supposedly are the “most educated and hard working” they come over here and they take all our best jobs too and that’s also not fucking opinion
I’m pretty much done voting, dating, or looking at men
If you are white, I will boldly presume you have yellow fever
If you support the Bible, I will boldly presume you have yellow fever
If you are married to an Asian, you most definitely have yellow fever
If you look at me with any interest, I’m gonna assume you have yellow fever
If you are alive, you have yellow fever
If you act interested in me, I’m just gonna reply “I’m not a ten, I’m not Asian”
“I don’t want to be your fleshlight”
And that’s what living with real autism is like
Many of Genzie and millennials, who claim to be “autistic” are really just emancipated
I’m kinda disgusted with humanity and those “in charge” ruining everything with religion and race
They use art and cartoon to get yeah
And NASA admitted it’s all “CGI artist interpretation”
James Webb only sees in red
I don’t know how else to get through
The rest is just data and numbers
Dots
They assign colors to numbers
It’s not even art, it’s an algorithm
And I’m tired of being conditioned to think that AI is art, it’s fucking not
It’s cutting corners
It’s lazy
It’s cheap (tho expensive lol)
Like I worked really hard to be a decent woman for man
And you all have yellow fever
At least the majority do
The fact that I’m still ascending (descending into hell)
The fact that God doesn’t want me disassociating anymore
“Where do you get your truth”
Not from the Bible – it uncovers the grand lie
The Great Pyramid scheme
The Great Wall of Deceit (is being disassembled on the black market and sold to build homes yassssssss – tear down the wall)!!!!!!!!
Did it ever occur to you that I am the truth
I’m one of God’s angels (I declare this and identify as angelic)
I am a truthmonger
I’ve been questioning my parents and the establishment since I was very young and I knew this was all bullshit
“How do you know the sun is so far away, you’ve been?” (Asked age 5)
“We shon a laser on a wall”
And I hate to be the bearer of bad news, or whatever news it is because you won’t believe me anyway, but the sun is electrical and closer to us than you’ve been told
Now I don’t mean plug in a socket electrical
But water exists as a fourth stage: plasma
Also, the Moon is a dead star (earth probably actually formed from her but whatev)
Again, I never believed the earth-moon theory
Never believed in the Big Bang model
Or the evolution theory
Or, that “women come from the rib of man”
If that somehow makes Asian women better than me – because I don’t believe in delusions of grandeur – and instead equality – then so be it. I’ll die alone without any worth from man cuz I’m not plastic surgery or yellow nor will bow to them simply to bow
Respect is earned
I know my worth even though I’m constantly crying to God “I’m worthless”, “I don’t deserve anything”
Apparently, this new age weed can cause suicidal ideation, and further complicate PTSD.
I’m getting off it now as I’ve never been more suicidal in my life
Big pharma also made me extremely homicidal
I will be real with you – so-in-so needs to go ahead and file multiple restraining orders- and I hear the more you have – the less they work
“90% of all murders happen by men“
But the other 10% – !?!
Are people worth going to jail for? No
But if you’re already dying and dead…
And you’ve sold or trashed everything you own…
What’s to lose!?!
It’s not murder if eye for eye
“You took my life”
But I have faith that God wants more for me than dying on the street or revenge from atrocities
It can go either way
I’m prepared for the worst outcome – dying
It won’t be jail or committed
DO NOT MOURN FOR ME
Porn has made it that man has no value at all – though he is racist to his core
I read into many articles about yellow fever – and migration patterns to the USA
It’s only the immigrants who say that are satisfied with their income and family here – and I summed it up to gentrification.
And now Biden made it so non- citizens can vote.
Americans are slaves to the Asian and Asian Americans who identify mostly as “Chinese American” and mostly only care about Chinese culture
Chinese culture has taken over America including yellow fever
Magical childlike pussies huh
Y’all are disgusting
I don’t wanna look at anybody in the eye
Some guy paying me a compliment: “I’m not Asian, shut up”
Our best jobs are given to the brightest and most brilliant immigrants who move here and naturalize – have children – and give those children the good jobs; the president said “they come here and take our best jobs”. Yep.
Our children (native) must wait 18 years to get a say…
They come here, and ruin Americans with propaganda and take their right to vote away, thousands of Americans are not allowed to vote because of crimes they already paid for.
I love everything
But the immigrants continue to destroy the environment to build a mall or shopping center that will be abandoned in a few years
Narcissism is a plague
Nihilism
I can’t stand it
And I’m tired of people trying to force my mouth closed when I am a soldier and politics is what I’m aware of
Florida is sinking
The whole of America has sunk
This isn’t about your green card!
Native Americans live on plantation’s like suppressed little slaves
Unless Hollywood TikTok has given them limelight
Narcissism
Manmade cats are unnatural for the environment – destroying nature
Dogs and cats spread disease
Also “made in China” and the first Bible can be traces back to Asia
Gonna follow the trails to the caves in Antartica and cut off their heads
(Thinking out loud again)
They keep adding all these additional charges to carry a smart phone and I’m ready to sell mine or downsize to a boring dumb phone.
The Internet is all predator, propaganda, and porn. Spam and spyware. Viruses. And they make us pay for it….
I’m over everything
Voting especially.
It’s all glaringly corrupt
I will not shut up…
Things need to be fixed
People from other countries shouldn’t get to move here and vote sooner than our own children and selves who are native to here
But that’s not what the article’s will say
Just like the bullshite globalism agenda spread through the college professors – that I always argued with – the articles will say non-citizens being allowed to vote is a good thing
I disagree
Conflict-of-interest
Period!
Remember them telling us “don’t discuss your income in the workplace”
That’s because shady business was going down
Now some states are requiring full income disclosure
I don’t believe the government can have transparency without gaslighting and a lie
This whole society is built on lovebombing, triangulation, gaslighting, lying.
“Don’t block me out, Emmet. I know you can hear me!”
Because the Christian God is narcissistic and evil. The Bible today is a fallacy – and to your own accord – a sin.
Emmet was always around the children. And smoking.
He can’t keep a straight face!
Pedo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Scene forward:
“And you can keep the jewelry! It’s fake!” *sinister laugh
And I was holding onto the gold like it had value because I put value on the cheapest things
“The thought NO LONGER counts” fixed
Men have devalued me for so long I no longer wanna look them in the eye
Annie no longer cares about the toys, she stated this.
Annie was depressed because Emmet said she would be
Tough love
“Keep your eye on the toys Annie, you know about toys”
How about stop conditioning me!!!!!!!!
Free will please!!!!!!!!
But not so much free will I jump in a whirlpool on ketamine like Jacob!
God bless what the fuck
I barely can dip my toes in the water without screaming
I don’t like anything in this society
Edgar was right to die on the street – naked – out of his mind
“The children have gone insane” and are boomers in position of power
Gen X the silent dangerous generation
I’m glad we’ve been ghosted by society
Won’t see me coming
And… while we’re on the subject
That cheap junk you’re wearing, that isn’t cotton, actually causes insanity, is extremely flammable and hard to put out
I bet the people in Pompeii were wearing synthetics
People dropping bills to buy foam shoes (which cause cancer/insanity)
All that sports clothing
JUNK
And I hate how they came over here and changed the meaning of silk, satin, and Cordaroy to now mean synthetics
“Men can have babies!!!!”
Well, I mean that’s good and all that you’re growing babies now because you’ve pretty much made most women infertile with nihilism or the death jab or emancipation
Fake tits are gross
Plastic surgery is the devil
Narcissism at its root
I said what I said
Happy to help
I can’t even look at Melanie Griffith anymore, because of what she did to herself
I’m ghosting HollyWood
Grooming everyone to fuck children
Many famous people won’t let their children around TV
Red flag!
Rules for thee, not for me!
I hate it here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Feed the wildlife! They’re crying asshole!!!!!! Stop destroying everything to build a shopping center!!!!
Like how no man has ever seen me with any value – and destroyed everything I owned – while watching me work so hard to prove my worth/existence
But gentrification exists, because the rich hoard everything and they love us watching us fight for the cheap shit
A bone just to survive
I’m resetting my game. I’m allowed.
End game/Quit. Reset/Start over.
This time I go forward knowing my value to man is NONE.
Which is fine because 1-5 have an STD and I can’t look at any of them and take them serious.
Even if I wanted to date, the pool is tainted.
It ain’t worth the dive.
I live for God now. Sorry not sorry.
And I went back to the Mall. Spencer’s had even more hardcore sex toys out – and little boys were around.
I nearly threw up.
I don’t want anything to do with this porn infested devil society.
I’ll never know what it’s like to be valued or loved by a man – because I don’t have fake tits or come with “instant gratification” mode.
Sex with us commoners is boring to them
They hate our existence in general
The divorce rate is 85% and 1 in 5 men have an STD.
I know I’m boring and cheap so why you looking anyway.
You can’t afford me.
Honestly, it’ll take a miracle to get me to date now knowing one in five can give you cancer (there are some known parasites that can be spread through human contact) (they didn’t give us the nitty gritty in school but I got the good education some of the time)
Research parasites that cause cancer – then “human contact” (they won’t tell you it’s in the man’s sperm)
But you can catch a parasite from a cat box or kissing on an animal or eating food
The labs aren’t designed to see them (with malicious intent and purpose)
The elites were plagued with parasites
LAUGHS
I live for God now (unless he finds me a husband without an STI/STD or porn addiction or addiction of any kind unless to me)
🤪
BABES you can do this
It’s not end all
I did a CARMAX offer
If the physical offer holds up near as good as the digital, I may bite
Suddenly want a car…
Love the Jeep to much
Took good care of her, she’s at 75K miles
Feel frighteningly suicidal but at least this way she’s safe out of my hands
I want a little feminine car
And maybe some work from home or a hotdog stand
Do not want to die here
Do not want this hand
RESET GAME
“Are you sure, all data will be removed”
NO YES
No car, no address!
LAUGHS
Needed to lighten my load
Buoyancy
So many people have died exploring caves.
The earth is alive
Stop selling sex toys in front of minors. Like what the fuck
1 in 5 men have an STD and a divorce or three on their belt.
I got new skates for Christmas. Too much value, too much fun.
I once lived for man but they are obsessed with porn stars and always have money to impress and spoil and buy sex workers.
They love the backdoors and backrooms. Even the cleanest of them, the ones you’d never suspect cheating most definitely are. They use burner phones, identities, and make good use of work away from home.
In college I learned one husband gave his wife HIV/AIDS but started medication without telling her thus sealing her fate (it’s illegal to do this but men do not care) (the medication did not work for her because they did not start it together and he kept infecting her)
1 in 5 y’all
I may leave America all together
It’s disgusting here
My neighbors are gross
I want my neighbors to be the crocodiles and the crows
And a man that isn’t infected or at risk or risky behavior
Stop looking at me
Keep back ten feet
(I also researched other countries and their sexual health isn’t any better)
My best friend always said before she died by suicide age thirteen, “don’t be silly, put a condom on your willy” – Meika Capps
So the reason I am so sensitive to sex toys being sold in front of children is because I was sexually abused as a child and my therapist kind of brought this point up to me yesterday, but it was a revelation point – like oh – I started crying.
And I am extremely triggered being exposed to sex toys especially when teenagers and children are around (my recent experience at the mall for example – I’ll never return). Humiliated and frightened to death. I don’t even own sex toys. It desensitizes the area. It’s Satanic (sorry not sorry) (manmade not of original design or use)
That stuff was always behind 21+ adult stores – behind black walls – the secret backrooms have become open orgy in the street.
This isn’t the same country I fought for. My values don’t match with what’s being forced on me.
My therapist has seen the worst of me and is proud of me. FYI. I’m like okay but there’s holes in my wall…
It took a lot to stop disassociating just to figure out what my values were and I know that they are not being a band, groupie propaganda whore, or sex bot
I have done some stripping in my life yes. But I was terrible at it. They all wanted more from me and got pissed when the answer was no. Pretty bias exists. The money no. I was rated a 5 in my 20s. Laughs out loud.
How to get rid of mold? Evacuate the premises. Don’t build on top a swamp ran by an evil Chinese dictator slumlord.
Gentrification is a thing, and the Fair Housing act just means this:
Society is a scam
Base pay + give it time and they will start charging to wipe your ass
So forced to live in deplorable conditions – where white lives are in deletion (check the census asshole, it’s not just how people are reporting)
Black Lives Matter!!! White lives don’t!
Yay!!!!!!!
Being on fixed income doesn’t mean one can’t pay rent but now they are including all this other bullshit to keep people out 🚩
Who the fuck wants to pay $95 a month for cable reruns when the Internet is free?
Who the fuck wants to pay an extra $250 a month just to park their vehicle where they live?
Who the fuck wants someone else controlling their electricity and the temperature of their home?
The rich gents do. Gentrification. The Fair Housing act is bullshit.
Who the fuck wants to pay an extra $40 a month just to have storage space? Oh yeee a garage! That’ll be an extra fifty please. Go to jail. Do not pass go.
And… 100k in insurance for the cheap shit I no longer own!
$100 app fee ($25 in the 90s, it keeps creeping up each year) + now an additional $200 “admin fee”
Tell the pedos to get fucked
I’d rather live in a box
Than under BlackRock who are taking ownership of all the major towns and cities in the ungreat state of Florida, which has quickly turned to shit like California and New York, because the immigrants have fucking ruined it
I said what I said
Narcissism is a plague
Dogs were made in a lab in Asia and now they want to charge you for owning one in your home because pet rent you know and slavery
I hate living here as much as John Jones hates that cave
The map is hangman everywhere I go
And now they are fucking with the Second Amendment and trying to take our guns. By creating rules on who can own one if plagued by a mental illness (that they caused). Just like they changed the definition of a woman to benefit man. Anything to get closer to the children. Porn could be censored like our free speech. The way Elon Musk can censor a picture circulating of himself that he don’t like. Too much control and power. They don’t believe in God and they think they are gods. Just like they edited the Bible to suit their agenda. Condition you, change the rules. History rewritten before our eyes. But as long as you keep hitting your vape pen and being poly cuz lgbt is a cult and Satan is in society.
This timeline ain’t even real. Manmade traps to serve man only. They fucking hate women being in charge of creation and are destroying everything and plan to edit dna and rebuild a new earth where they are gods. It must end. 90% of all murders happen by men. Honeybees have a 50% reduced lifespan now thanks to gene editing. Human population is also down.
Doctors aren’t your friend. I’m not here to make amends; judgment hour: angel. What’s hard to comprehend? It’s hell or ascend.
Follow me if you wanna go off map and get lost….
RIP John Jones (as above, so below)
(What’s happening to me, happened to him)
Patterns are key to survival. Don’t ignore warnings or red flags.
The Great Void isn’t real. I want it to be but then I studied it. It’s made up to fit their expansion model. The Big Bang isn’t real. Science is fake. “We create our own reality”. Computers can’t feel. Please wake up.
I sold my TV.
I might be selling my military uniforms, but then I think oh my God, how fucking suicidal am I now
It’s this or the mold
I’m trying to escape gravity
Mold comes from the deep void
But the void ain’t real and we can’t leave earth
Since 1970 68% of all life has gone extinct
But now the honeybees are at 50% half-life thanks to science 😍
I watched a demon toss a live tree in the trash. Christmas is over. No remorse. What’s next to own and/or destroy? Fuck the poor. Fuck the white.
I went in to make changes to my Amazon Wishlist and they have new features – already selected for you – about disclosing your address to the buyer
“The seller may disclose your address to the buyer”
Wait. What. 👀
I have a brain injury and maybe I’m misinterpreting what that says!?!
I’ve since unchecked the box – and I’ve no one spoiling me – but I very much intend to spoil me – as these are items I want/need.
That’s a dangerous new feature Amazon has added
I wasn’t even aware until I was acting emo and making privacy changes
Anyhoo…
If you have children using it or anyone under the age of 18 and they have an Amazon wishlist account and people spoiling them, then they may be getting access to your home address now.
I care about the unsuspecting adults too (like self) and people with mental illness who may try and obtain an address for harm
I don’t understand how it’s legal for a business to do something like this, it’s fucking dangerous
They are using grams as weight now cuz America belongs to the immigrants and their children born here naturalized
The immigrants get to vote before our children legally turn 18 to do so
LMAO
I wish I had known all this before I started College is a scam.
Quietly LOUDLY quitting society
Information is knowledge so please let folks know that their lives are in danger now – unless they want complete strangers with their shipping address!?!?
I don’t like giving out my phone number or email and now we’re just giving folks our home address huh.
Why not just give the buyer your address and fuck Amazon all together?
Why use a third party at all? Which was the entire fucking point I thought.
Amazon is dead
There’s hardly a place worth shopping
I like thrift stores and antique furniture shops
I will find the most ugly shop in Florida you can find.
This is a special Christian thrift store – you can only visit X amount of times to shop
Sitting near the entrance of the store – cookie instructions
But anyone in the world is allowed to shop free there (free shopping, I know it’s weird)
Loaded the Jeep up – all 3 bags from the Thrift shop 🙂
I never know what I will find and there is a 25 item limit each visit. The Jeep was stocked.
One worker said, “I got a bag fresh in if you want it” cuz I had found a cool vintage wicker basket and they thought I’d like this. They were right. In fact, I’ve been looking all over for something but didn’t like the plastic junk currently out there. Universe said “gotcha, know just the thing you need”. Precisely.
Zero holes or tears. Zips correctly and without aggravation (thus far). I think it might be insulated and for kitchen/food use… not what I’ll be using it for. Or will I? 🤔
Also scored a full size Cannon quilt – these thing’s don’t ever run cheap
It’s comfy and making my terribly uncomfortable bed more comfies. It’ll fit the Jeep when I’m homeless again. I already put it through the wash. Need some sheets to match. Love the colors. Not too thick for Florida. Absolutely nothing wrong with it.
Also scored a hardback dictionary from back in the 70s, before the timelime was switched.
A book I’ll understand.
And got this magical purple velvet box with an angel inside – and one of a kind – she’s resting on clouds – but the art is painstakingly done on the inside of the ornament (I mostly wanted the box)
Purple velvet box with special ornament inside
Because it’s glass and has a mirror effect, it’s hard to get a picture of…
She is special and resting on clouds. I don’t know how to get a better photo. All you see is me in the reflection. Inside under her contains this note.
But the wicker basket was a nice find. I mostly cared about the basket.
Inside was three all cotton embroidered Christmas hand towels from Thailand – along with vintage soup with hand drawn art on it. Vintage.
I removed the soap and washed the towels and cleaned up the wicker basket.
100% cotton Christmas embroidered hand towels from Thailand
Vintage art soap from Thailand (my guess is this was also hand painted)
There was also non-edible cinnamon bark with decorations inside with the towels and soap.
Vintage handwoven wicker basket
Got 2 matching sets of 100% all cotton bath towels
And a couple plates
A ceramic spoon holder (now in the wash)
Some clothing like sweaters and nice fancy t-shirts
A small petite robe by Pink
A very long and beautiful crotchet table runner with my small dream home and a tree
Also this paper tablecover and a little Gospel of John propaganda book about the story of God
It’s a special thrift store and can only be visited a certain amount of times.
Anyhoo. The cost is absolutely free and it’s not junk. I’ve been all over town trying to find a bag.
Online too. God hooked me up. Special delivery fresh in. “It just arrived, thought you might like it”. I absolutely did. God bless. I didn’t know I needed a food delivery bag, but hey, have you watched made in heaven yet?
I don’t know if it’s a food delivery bag, but it would work well for picnics and things like that or to put in the back of my Jeep in the trunk area and put items in it like groceries
You could store blankets and things in it. Love my wicker basket and black travel bag! Absolutely great to store the groceries to and from! If that’s what I’ll use it for…
Mikey didn’t know what to do with the shovel. I’m in a similar boat.
I have things part of my purpose that I haven’t sorted yet.
I don’t know how to store and organize the important things.
Got 3 important boxes. All varying sizes. Velvet and satin lining. Wicker woven. Black potentially insulated. Do I keep the ornament and box together?
I thought that little wicker basket would be great to store my pads and tampons in, but surely there’s a better use for it than that…
Already washed and put out… love that all my towels and blankets are cotton! (Synthetic fibers are highly flammable and hard to put out)
Check out Frog Ministry of Edgewater, Florida (free to anyone in the world – but you get X amount of visits) 🎄
Yesterday I carried the Smart TV to the bin. It’s stupid. The Internet is dead and ran by an algorithm. It should be made 21+. It’s full of propaganda, porn, and predators.
Walmart is selling sex toys in front of children – and online too in the “health” section.
This is not healthy or good. Growing up all my life, that stuff was found in Adult 21+ stores only.
Now I’m exposed to it shopping for essentials. I don’t own any toys. I don’t want to see anal plugs next to Lava Lamps or in the “health” section. Porn has destroyed humanity. FYI. I know you don’t care. 90% of all murders happen by men and since 1970 68% of ALL LIFE has gone extinct.
It’s synthetic everything now. Can’t even find some cotton from my hometown. I feel a stranger in my own land and country I fought for.
It was always the dollar tree, always. That junk was never worth more than pennies. Fucking GAWD. IMMIGRATION
I don’t want any part of toxic America society which has been destroyed by our enemy through globalism and narcissism.
I continue to receive the rainforest in my mailbox to eat at places or to shop at places I will never shop at.
I can’t opt out anywhere from anything. It’s toxic and sick.
They are trying to commit soldiers who are going after 100% disability for mental health through the VA.
I will go all Hannibal Lecter on your ass. I will. God knows. 👀
The suicide rate continues to increase among veterans and military because the OER’s and NCOER’s aren’t matching the Mission statement or what’s going on in the real world
I’m very depressed and suicidal but you’re not gonna lock me into a fucking jail cell because I don’t agree with this dictatorship society and never have
And now when you go out and about there are a bunch of desensitized GenZ and Millennials who only care about instant gratification, quietly quitting, or the LGBT community.
I am quietly quitting society
I’m not gonna sit back and let the enemy commit me for what they’ve done to me
I’m leaving here soon
This identity
It’s all gone
Back to reading books (I still have yours with ripped out pages and I’m still speaking to ghosts)
They want to commit us…
The rubberband is gonna pop
They keep pushing us and FYI we busted our ass more than any generation alive – with nothing but scar wounds to show for it – and they want to commit us – instead of paying us compensation.
It’s sick what the enemy is getting away with because the Millennials are so emancipated
I’m trapped like John Jones only I currently got a toilet which is now under BlackRock ownership
There’s no rent control out here
They are gutting us from the inside with policies that do not fit America
Joining an app or signing up for an account just means they are going to sell your private personal data and you can never fully leave
And being the observant that I am, I read the details. It included a secret on the back. God wanted me to know. I feel it is a universal sign. I’ve been making many stews after all. And today, included cinnamon bark.
(Protein of choice can be used – I’m avoiding lab made proteins – but am Flexitarian and mostly consume a vegetarian/vegan diet. I’m a picky meat eater too; beef, chicken, turkey mostly and fish on the occasion).
Making stew with spring water and cinnamon bark
I made my broth from scratch again – but memaw (my grandmother passed) never tossed out the fat from the meat and today I decided to do the same. Since I keep skin and seeds on, FAT PLEASE.
Ingredients used: spring water, Tomatoes from the Vine, cherry tomato medley (later popped), cinnamon bark, fresh garlic, onion, celery, cilantro, sweet yellow, orange, and green peppers with seeds, rainbow carrots, dry green split peas, wild rice blend, rosemary, thyme, parsley, salt with the necessary nutrients (maybe), pepper, potato with skin on and washed, red kidney bean (but I can’t buy canned beans anymore because they are putting things in them that they should not and I’ll stick to adding dry lentils, split pea, rice, ect). Added half can of tomato sauce too which it absolutely did not need and the stew would have survived without it)
I cooked up ethically sourced organic beef with onion and spices and put 4 spoons of the fat into the stew. I continued cooking the beef to a nice texture and gently added it to the stew – and then a shit ton of cabbage 🤪
I let the cabbage cook down some and then I added even more cabbage
But that wasn’t enough. So more.
IT’S THE BEST SOUP I’VE EVER MADE AND I SAY THAT ABOUT EVERY POT BUT THIS ONE CONTAINS A SPECIAL SECRET INGREDIENT
Cinnamon bark. It’ll be going in everything now. Practicing gratitude. Thank you Lord. Now maybe my stew is fit for a king.
A lump of cinnamon bark in the leftovers
And I put it with the leftovers. Apparently cinnamon is a great anti-parasitic and pet friendly too.
The dog went mad for my soup. He got second’s plus additional bites.
My bowl consumed in light-speeds – did not add a pinch of anything.
So the stew would be good without a meat protein source but the heart demanded. Just don’t add meat.
I made homemade vegetable beef this time. Probably not like anyone else makes it.
I’m terribly full but already greedy for another bowl. I’m stuffed. And definitely wanna enjoy leftovers so gotta ration and need a bigger pot! 🙂
Happy holidays. Still eating my nuts and things. I’m going to a food drive on Friday. Curious to know if the universe will gift me any secrets. I’m invested. 🙂
Oh and, scored my 3 pack detox for the price of 1. Grateful. The detox continues…. the heart journey, the healing.
The dust is on the mirror, not the clothes. I can’t keep up. 🤪
I didn’t really know it was there. It’s only been two weeks since I last dusted it. How dare it. Get dirty. Just sitting there.
Today I shook hands with the Devil. He extended his hand. I took it with grip. Said “thanks for seeing me, Happy Holidays”. Practicing gratitude.
Also, nearly was not seen at the VA clinic because they are under orders to evacuate, as is everyone beachside. Scary storm again. Arrives tomorrow. Been raining two days non-stop.
Instead, a male doc took me on since the female care team are “insert something nice”
EVAC in order. Everyone had to exit the building by noon. Appointment over.
Clocked in at 112 pounds too (weight not speed)
Anyhoo
Everything has been halted again
And I’m still drinking Black Walnut Wormwood religiously
Herbals of the gods
I made the most amazing soup again – had a bowl today – God grows the most amazing things, and I need a bigger pot to put cook them in
I was slurping the broth out of the bowl, “thank you for healing me”
My skirt fits. I may have a future. I may not be yeeted out of society yet.
I’m ready to say yes to some of these side gigs
“I’ll give you 10-12 hours, with the potential for an additional 8, under one condition”
But I also filed for an increase again, and those take time, and it needs to be done right
Tests have been ordered
I’m lucky to be alive
This year has been a straight up fight for my life but no wonder no clothes was fitting me at 112 pounds 🤪
Gingerbread cookies are definitely in my future
Love me skirt. Denim. Perfect fall attire. I went with a medium (size 6). ROMWE. Said it would not be restocked. Doesn’t matter. I’ll wear it til it works no more.
Made the peach look good, not flat. Or maybe that’s the rebound fitness sessions 👀
I’m not allowed to go beachside, it’s shut down and under strict curfew and EVAC orders
Do you think me and that group hanging out on the beach last storm (the dude swimming in it) had anything to do with it?
Because they weren’t this pressed about Ian
According to all the official stats out here, Daytona Beach is going to continue to experience “severe flooding over the next 30 years”
Wanna go skating so bad but it’s been raining so much. Wanna do the outdoor skate parks first. Open air. Sky. Zero costs. Fitness exercise. The rinks cost the dollars. I’ll hit those up eventually.
I’m not wearing a mask skating tho no – just to take it off to eat.
Free skate park built here in 2019. 👍👍
Gonna test the new skates there.
I’m sorta nearly done shopping at Dolls Kill and Shein tho 🙂
Walmart is selling sex toys under the health department online. We once had to visit “adult bookstores” for any adult content.
21+ to enter
If Walmart is selling anal plugs, I guess the gas stations will be doing it next
America is toxic
I want out or far far away from society
And definitely stop supporting the enemy 🙂
I’ve scored some awesome things that will improve my life tho
Kinda need clothing that fits
Or that I want to wear
That isn’t business attire or military related
The whole mothership getting a makeover
Been getting so many job offers in the real world that I know I over qualify for, that’d I’d love to say, “I’ll give yah 10-20 hours”
But I have a hard time breathing 🙂
Skating will be so greattttttrttttrrttttrtr
“It can’t rain all the time…”
Some places it feels like it never ends. And I ain’t complaining. It looks creepy and scary out. Floods incoming again. End of the world.
Shook the devil’s hand today
Hold on, level up! 🤪
Challenge accepted
What are the terms? 🤪
“You go where I go”
112 pounds eh. Still gotta tone up. Shedding fat. But also need to fatten up and plan to include real butter in my diet again. Not vegetable oil. Not soybean. Not natural flavor lab made.
I’m still eating good
Until I fucked things all up with that Halloween candy
And nearly wound up in Urgent Care
And thank fuck the female team couldn’t do their job and the male doctor listened to me and things are moving forward with progress even though everything’s been halted because of the storm and the Evacuation orders
Happy holidays y’all
There are people out here still fighting for their life because of the vaccines and other things
Gulf war related thangs
Real soldier. Real battle wounds.
Friday is Veterans Day! HOOAH
I don’t know if anything will be open for me to go out and get any of the free meals or benefits due to the storm
I do like getting all the free thangs
Subs. Coffee. Donuts. Meals from Applebee’s and all sorts of places. Usually start early in the morn, pace myself, and make a day, evening included.
I am hungry. To eat another bowl had amazing soup.
PoeEternal 